# Ask the Felcher **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 26, 2000, 10:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561 "2000-06-26T10:11:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![eggo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c4cdca/32.png) [@eggo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eggo)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2000, 10:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/1 "2000-06-26T10:11:52Z")
What! I didn’t mean me… ---
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/2 "2003-09-16T22:21:36Z")
Would I be called a felcher in the pit by hordes of people if I asked you a question 3 years too late? ---
**Author:** ![truthbot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e9bcb4/32.png) [@truthbot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/truthbot)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/3 "2003-09-16T22:39:13Z")
Jack Handy, is that you??? ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/4 "2003-09-16T22:40:04Z")
No, you’d be called the person who resurrected a more-than-three-years dead thread by several less-than-happy Mods., is my guess. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 10:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/5 "2003-09-16T22:47:16Z")
Query: why did you search for the word “felcher”? ---
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/6 "2003-09-16T22:52:59Z")
I didn’t. I was reading a topic the other day that had “Watershed” Moments of the SDMB. One of the links in there linked to a topic where every single “Ask the” topics were posted. Clicking on the most interesting one, I must admit, I didn’t pay attention to the date when I replied a few minutes ago. I must remember that preview is my friend. :o So I’m sorry for bumping up such an old topic. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/7 "2003-09-16T22:54:27Z")
:dubious: You know, if you’re curious about felchers, you could just ask. You don’t have to construct these elaborate stories. ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/8 "2003-09-16T22:56:01Z")
(And what do you mean you didn’t pay attention to the date? You only posted **one sentence** , which almost exclusively focused on the date of the OP.) ---
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/9 "2003-09-16T22:58:39Z")
Ouch, caught in a lie. Okay, Okay, You’re right, I really did want to know about felchers but The Pit intimidates me. I had no idea (and still don’t) what one may be. But since we are on the subject right now anyway…could you enlighten me? ---
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/10 "2003-09-16T23:01:30Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Giraffe \* > \*\*:dubious: > > You know, if you’re curious about felchers, you could just ask. You don’t have to construct these elaborate stories. \*\* By the way, _that_ really wasn’t a story. 😛 [This is where I found it.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=79439) ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/11 "2003-09-16T23:09:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Idle Thoughts \* > \*\*Ouch, caught in a lie. > Okay, Okay, You’re right, I really did want to know about felchers but The Pit intimidates me. > > I had no idea (and still don’t) what one may be. > > But since we are on the subject right now anyway…could you enlighten me? \*\* What’s so funny about the whole thing is not only lying about what you said on a message board (i.e. written medium), but that the lie was four posts back. I enjoyed it very much. As for your question, it’s my understanding that a felcher is a wacky guy, usually played by Chevy Chase, who upon realizing that there’s more to his friend’s murder than meets the eye, uses a variety of clever subterfuges and quips to crack the case wide open, in the end both catching the murderer and getting the girl. No wait, that’s Fletch. I have no idea what a felcher is. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/12 "2003-09-16T23:15:21Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Giraffe \* > \*\*What’s so funny about the whole thing is not only lying about what you said on a message board (i.e. written medium), but that the lie was four posts back. I enjoyed it very much. \*\* Yea, I apoligize. I think it’s mostly because this whole place just imtimidates me. I don’t post much, I just lurk. I’ve printed out and read about 300 topics so far over the last 3 months…all of them being about 60 posts or above and being anywhere from between 1999 and today. Just recently I’ve been doing this in the Pit…and man alive, I feel almost scared to say anything in these forums lest I be totally reamed against. The intelligence here is scary. > [@](#): > > \*\*No wait, that’s Fletch. I have no idea what a felcher is. 😛 \*\* And I thank you for putting a smile on my face on an otherwise dreary day. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Giraffe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/giraffe/32/129_2.png) [@Giraffe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giraffe)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2003, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/13 "2003-09-16T23:36:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Idle Thoughts \* > \*\*\*\*Yea, I apoligize. > > I think it’s mostly because this whole place just imtimidates me. I don’t post much, I just lurk. > \*\* No need to apologize – my posts were intended as light-hearted jabs, not criticism. And you really shouldn’t be intimidated about posting, especially in MPSIMS and IMHO. (Stay away from Great Debates, though, that’s where the Bad People are.) I agree that the Pit can be rough, but as long as you can admit when you’re wrong and tell people to fuck off when you’re not, you’ll be fine. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Stage\_Manager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stage_manager/32/7267_2.png) [@Stage\_Manager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stage_Manager)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2003, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/14 "2003-09-17T00:20:03Z")
Felching: ejaculating into the anus of another and then sucking out the semen and any other fluids (or solids) therein. Careful what you ask. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2003, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/15 "2003-09-17T00:22:55Z")
You should listen to **Giraffe**. He once ate something he peed on. So he knows all about gross things. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![lel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8797f3/32.png) [@lel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lel)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2003, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/16 "2003-09-17T00:28:31Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Idle Thoughts \* > \*\*Would I be called a felcher in the pit by hordes of people if I asked you a question 3 years too late? \*\* Oh, my eyes! :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2003, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/17 "2003-09-17T00:49:05Z")
Oh my…Thanks for telling me at least…:eek: ---
**Author:** ![quiltguy154](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/ad7895/32.png) [@quiltguy154](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/quiltguy154)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2003, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/18 "2003-09-17T02:14:09Z")
So I guess this isn’t the place to find instructions on how to make arrows? ---
**Author:** ![Rabid\_Squirrel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Rabid\_Squirrel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rabid_Squirrel)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2003, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/19 "2003-09-17T02:28:49Z")
\<=== ===\> \<==\> ??? 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Idle\_Thoughts](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/838e76/32.png) [@Idle\_Thoughts](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Idle_Thoughts)\ **Post date:** [September 17, 2003, 2:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561/20 "2003-09-17T02:46:54Z")
I wonder if eggo is still lurks… [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-felcher/23561.md?page=2)