# Ask the Gay Guy V! (The next generation) **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 23, 2014, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762 "2014-04-23T05:08:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2014, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/61 "2014-05-19T20:27:38Z")
Yeah! Why can’t we all just shut up and hide in the closet like normal people and stop making **Imnotivan** get those funny feelings down there? ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2014, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/62 "2014-05-19T20:28:39Z")
> [@Iamnotivan](#): > > I have travelled 43 nations for 50 years, many multiple times and many underdeveloped. I don’t know whether so-called “gays” here have any idea that for millenia men have had intimate relations with other men without ever having a parade, flag, insufferably overwhelming publicity, constant whining and making demands and perpetual and infinite outrage at anything and everything. Many, possibly the vast majority were not even homosexual in the longer term. > > But now, largely because of the U.S. and Canada, men in non-western countries fear being labelled as “gay” if they do what young men have done for all time. For so long, men did not want to be labelled, but now the label is suddenly so important, arrogant and militant. > > I read of a great mayor of some town in Sicily who said he is not “gay” just homosexual. He wants nothing to do with parades, gay marriage etc. Hats off to the mayor for refusing to hop on the lemming band wagon. Bully for him. Yes, I’m well aware that men have hooked up with each other since the beginning of time. For many of them it was just about sex, but we’ve realized that we don’t have to marry a woman that we’re not interested in, have children that we may or may not even want and can live openly as couples and have the same legal rights that any other couple has the right to. I want those non-western countries to stop jailing or executing people simply because they’d rather be with someone of the same sex. If some people don’t want that, they don’t have to take advantage of it. I want to, I want my partner to have the right to inherit my estate (not that it’s that much), make medical decisions for me as needed and all the other thousands of things that my brother and his wife are able to do. I’d rather be one of those ‘lemmings’ that are helping same sex couples have the same rights than a coward that believes they don’t deserve it. ---
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2014, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/63 "2014-05-19T20:31:22Z")
> [@Antinor01](#): > > I’d rather be one of those ‘lemmings’ that are helping same sex couples have the same rights than a coward that believes they don’t deserve it. Or a coward who sees homosexual/bisexual orientation becoming a minority norm and will no longer be able to hide behind “I’m only doing this because my girlfriend is being a frigid bitch”. The whole “I’m not a homosexual! I always pitch, never catch!” is still pretty prevalent worldwide. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2014, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/64 "2014-05-19T20:32:39Z")
> [@jayjay](#): > > Or a coward who sees homosexual/bisexual orientation becoming a minority norm and will no longer be able to hide behind “I’m only doing this because my girlfriend is being a frigid bitch”. The whole “I’m not a homosexual! I always pitch, never catch!” is still pretty prevalent worldwide. Or that girlfriend that always is mysteriously out of town. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2014, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/65 "2014-05-19T20:56:56Z")
Oh, and if you’re talking about Rosario Crocetta (once mayor, now governor of Sicily), it’s true that he doesn’t personally want to get married but he is in support of same sex marriage in general. > [@](#): > > Last March, on the evening of the election of Pope Francis, Crocetta appeared on a popular talk show, “Le Invasioni Barbariche” (“The Barbarian Invasions”). The plan was to do an interview about his life, but he ended up commenting — this was before Pope Francis’s recent conciliatory gestures — on the Catholic church’s aversion to gay marriage. “We should start talking about a church where a woman can become pope,” Crocetta said, “where priests can marry, where even gay marriages can be performed. A church that is an expression of — I won’t say contemporary life, but an expression of humanity. I don’t think you can get close to the sacred by denying the human being.” At that point the host, Daria Bignardi, interrupted him to ask if his confessor knew that he thought that way. “Of course he knows,” Crocetta answered. “If not, what are we talking about?” Bignardi pressed on, “And he absolves you anyway?” Crocetta replied: “Why shouldn’t he absolve me? Confessors give absolution to Mafiosi who have killed people. Why shouldn’t he absolve someone who frankly admits that he doesn’t feel it’s sinful to consider that love is a gift given by God?” ---
**Author:** ![Calatin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/439d5e/32.png) [@Calatin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Calatin)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2014, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/66 "2014-05-19T22:18:29Z")
> [@Antinor01](#): > > Or that girlfriend that always is mysteriously out of town. Well, when you are dating an international supermodel, you have to understand that she’s going to be traveling a lot for her job… ---
**Author:** ![Shawn\_K\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c67d28/32.png) [@Shawn\_K\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shawn_K_1)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2014, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/67 "2014-05-21T03:18:07Z")
The Fanatics thing wasn’t directed at anyone here in particular, just in reading various internet things over the years and a few people I’ve met over the years were very… strong in their beliefs on homosexuality and didn’t always seem to interested in discussing things and answering questions so much so as stating their beliefs and pretty much saying that’s the way it is. If my poor phrasing offended anyone I apologize as it definitely wasn’t meant that way 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2014, 3:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/68 "2014-05-21T03:43:35Z")
> [@Shawn\_K\_1](#): > > The Fanatics thing wasn’t directed at anyone here in particular, just in reading various internet things over the years and a few people I’ve met over the years were very… strong in their beliefs on homosexuality and didn’t always seem to interested in discussing things and answering questions so much so as stating their beliefs and pretty much saying that’s the way it is. > > If my poor phrasing offended anyone I apologize as it definitely wasn’t meant that way 🙂 I wasn’t offended, just curious what that meant. 🙂 It takes a hell of a lot more than that to offend me. ---
**Author:** ![Echo\_Charlie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b5e925/32.png) [@Echo\_Charlie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Echo_Charlie)\ **Post date:** [May 21, 2014, 9:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/69 "2014-05-21T09:01:09Z")
> [@Iamnotivan](#): > > I have travelled 43 nations for 50 years, many multiple times and many underdeveloped. I don’t know whether so-called “gays” here have any idea that for millenia men have had intimate relations with other men without ever having a parade, flag, insufferably overwhelming publicity, constant whining and making demands and perpetual and infinite outrage at anything and everything. Many, possibly the vast majority were not even homosexual in the longer term. Yeah, who needs to fight for such fripperies as marriage rights, protection from being violently attacked, and consumer and workplace non-discrimination laws when you can suck dick with other closet cases. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Dinna\_Fash](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/7ea924/32.png) [@Dinna\_Fash](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dinna_Fash)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2014, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/70 "2014-05-24T01:10:34Z")
> [@Bozuit](#): > > Yeah, it sort of does help. It’s still a bit difficult to understand or relate to the idea that sexuality can be so fluid, but then many things are until you experience them for yourself. > > Thanks to everyone for their replies. They were all informative. I agree that it’s hard to relate to until it happens to you. I spent my whole life thankful that I’m straight, that I don’t have to endure the hardships of others. I was married, had three kids, then divorced. I had had some degree of attraction toward women, but physically only, I didn’t want to date a woman (especially because, in general, women drive me crazy :rolleyes:). Then at the age of 33 I found the person that I truly want to spend the rest of my life with, who happens to be a woman. The world looks at me and calls me lesbian, which is fine, but I don’t like the label because I simply love who I love. If I were to find myself single again, possibly I would stick with women, but I may also date men again. For me, it’s the person, not their gender ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2014, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/71 "2014-05-24T03:05:31Z")
> [@Iamnotivan](#): > > I have travelled 43 nations for 50 years, many multiple times and many underdeveloped. I’m surprised you weren’t tossed out of more than 43. ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2014, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/72 "2014-05-24T06:33:23Z")
Is it because you like men or just dont like women? I mean why you guys dont like women? They smell better than we do. They talk different. They see things different. They have different mindsets. They have body parts we dont have. I’ve just never understood why you cannot find a woman to share your life with? ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2014, 6:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/73 "2014-05-24T06:44:46Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > Is it because you like men or just dont like women? > > I mean why you guys dont like women? They smell better than we do. They talk different. They see things different. They have different mindsets. They have body parts we dont have. I’ve just never understood why you cannot find a woman to share your life with? I do like women, I just have no sexual interest and have no desire to share a life with them. I found a man to share my life with (13 years and counting!) and we have different mindsets, see things differently, talk differently, smell different…and while we have the same body parts, his are interesting to me in different ways than my own are. To turn it around a little, do you like women or just don’t like men? They smell great, have the same body parts so know exactly what to do with them, have different mindsets and see things differently because every person does. ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2014, 6:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/74 "2014-05-24T06:58:55Z")
> [@Antinor01](#): > > I do like women, I just have no sexual interest and have no desire to share a life with them. I found a man to share my life with (13 years and counting!) and we have different mindsets, see things differently, talk differently, smell different…and while we have the same body parts, his are interesting to me in different ways than my own are. > > To turn it around a little, do you like women or just don’t like men? They smell great, have the same body parts so know exactly what to do with them, have different mindsets and see things differently because every person does. I just knew you would turn it around. Yeah I like men as buds. But to live with one the rest of my life sharing the same bed, closet, and bathroom - no. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2014, 7:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/75 "2014-05-24T07:00:50Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > I just knew you would turn it around. > > Yeah I like men as buds. But to live with one the rest of my life sharing the same bed, closet, and bathroom - no. Same for me with women. As much as you can’t imagine wanting to be with another man, I can’t imagine wanting to be with a woman. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [May 24, 2014, 7:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/76 "2014-05-24T07:30:50Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > Do you ever get annoyed with certain members of the gay community for being so in your face to straights about it or other behavior? Has this been answered yet? What the hell do you mean? What is “in your face” other than behavior which would be perfectly acceptable from someone straight? ---
**Author:** ![PurpleClogs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f04885/32.png) [@PurpleClogs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PurpleClogs)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2014, 1:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/77 "2014-05-25T01:25:32Z")
I have a family member who I just _knew_ was gay since he was 3 years old. Another family member and I have even talked about it, secretly of course, and she agreed I was probably right. There was just something about him, personality, emotions, even his little smiling face, even as a baby, sitting in his little high chair. I can’t explain how i knew. But i was positive. As he aged i became more convinced, the way he played, drawings he drew, things he was interested in. He was so good looking all through jr and HS. Very popular. Lots of friends of both sexes. Very outgoing. Years go by and now he’s in his first year in college. Still not a single girlfriend. There have been a couple girl friends that he took to dances and stuff. But i askedshia mom if it was a romantic date and she said no they were just good friends. I can’t help but feel so sorry for him that he might feel he has to either fight it or hide it. He should have had the joy of a boyfriend. I would hate it if he missed out on love through his young years. But what can you do? It’s truly none of my business. And I certainly am not going to be one to pressure him, out him, or make him uncomfortable. We love him terribly no matter what. I just want him to be happy. So i patiently wait for the day when he finally tells us, or brings someone home. ---
**Author:** ![Antinor01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecae2f/32.png) [@Antinor01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Antinor01)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2014, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/78 "2014-05-25T02:27:16Z")
You sound like a great relative. :). All you can do is wait until he figures it out and feels comfortable talking about it. ---
**Author:** ![Urbanredneck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/ea5d25/32.png) [@Urbanredneck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Urbanredneck)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2014, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/79 "2014-05-25T04:52:16Z")
> [@PurpleClogs](#): > > I have a family member who I just _knew_ was gay since he was 3 years old. Another family member and I have even talked about it, secretly of course, and she agreed I was probably right. There was just something about him, personality, emotions, even his little smiling face, even as a baby, sitting in his little high chair. I can’t explain how i knew. But i was positive. As he aged i became more convinced, the way he played, drawings he drew, things he was interested in. He was so good looking all through jr and HS. Very popular. Lots of friends of both sexes. Very outgoing. Years go by and now he’s in his first year in college. Still not a single girlfriend. There have been a couple girl friends that he took to dances and stuff. But i askedshia mom if it was a romantic date and she said no they were just good friends. I can’t help but feel so sorry for him that he might feel he has to either fight it or hide it. He should have had the joy of a boyfriend. I would hate it if he missed out on love through his young years. But what can you do? It’s truly none of my business. And I certainly am not going to be one to pressure him, out him, or make him uncomfortable. We love him terribly no matter what. I just want him to be happy. So i patiently wait for the day when he finally tells us, or brings someone home. But you dont really know do you? He might find a wonderful woman. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [May 25, 2014, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762/80 "2014-05-25T05:11:15Z")
> [@Urbanredneck](#): > > I mean why you guys dont like women? They smell better than we do. They talk different. They see things different. They have different mindsets. They have body parts we dont have. I’ve just never understood why you cannot find a woman to share your life with? Exactly. That’s why I chose to be straight. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-guy-v-the-next-generation/686762.md?page=3)