# Ask the gay KID **URL:** \ **Category:** Great Debates\ **Created:** [June 10, 2003, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958 "2003-06-10T20:35:27Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![KidCharlemagne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ed8c4c/32.png) [@KidCharlemagne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KidCharlemagne)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/21 "2003-06-11T14:50:04Z")
Does asking if someone is a “pitcher” or a “catcher” lack decorum? ---
**Author:** ![musicguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ba0ec/32.png) [@musicguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/musicguy)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/22 "2003-06-11T14:59:38Z")
Just a bit, **KidCharlemagne**.🙂 _IMHO, of course_ ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/23 "2003-06-11T15:00:45Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Esprix \* > I suddenly feel very, very old… Me three, Spree. I knew it was coming, but it depresses the hell out of me to see Stonewall going the way of Selma. ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/24 "2003-06-11T15:20:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by KidCharlemagne \* > \*\*Does asking if someone is a “pitcher” or a “catcher” lack decorum? \*\* Just look at [my shirt](http://www.kleptomaniac.com/product/?prod_id=5138) and you don’t have to ask. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Lucki\_Chaarms](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9de0a6/32.png) [@Lucki\_Chaarms](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucki_Chaarms)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/25 "2003-06-11T16:22:29Z")
**musicguy** - My school had no such official club, but there was certainly a group of us (bis, gays and lesbians) who sort of had each other’s back. This group was rather centered around the theater/arts department, as I imagine things like this often are. **KidCharlemagne** - Depends on the situation. Well, I’d say it’s always going to lack decorum, but in many situations, that’s acceptable. And **Homebrew** , those shirts rock. Also check out [http://www.thatoneshirt.com](http://www.thatoneshirt.com). LC ---
**Author:** ![dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dorkusmalorkusmafia/32/7266_2.png) [@dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dorkusmalorkusmafia)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/26 "2003-06-11T16:34:25Z")
As a former gay person in a big city (not Austin) in Texas, I can tell you about so much redneck harassment it isn’t funny. I had bad experiences in every big city in Texas for being gay, except for Austin. Austin is an oasis of culture for the rest of Texas, get over it. It is similar to how the democrats in Texas are like Republicans almost everywhere else. ---
**Author:** ![dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dorkusmalorkusmafia/32/7266_2.png) [@dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dorkusmalorkusmafia)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/27 "2003-06-11T16:39:37Z")
Oh and thanks Lucki for the responses! 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dorkusmalorkusmafia/32/7266_2.png) [@dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dorkusmalorkusmafia)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/28 "2003-06-11T16:48:48Z")
I almost forgot to add in my post two above that Austin is so tolerant that homeless drag queen,[Leslie](http://www.austinchronicle.com/issues/dispatch/2000-09-15/boar_test7.html) [Cochran,](http://members.tripod.com/~steadfast/cochran.html) ran for mayor and received 7% of the votes. In other cities in Texas she would have likely been lynched at the worst or called names at the best and any votes that would have been cast for her wouldn’t have made an actual percentage point much less 7. The only other place I can see anything remotely similar happening in the US is San Francisco. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/29 "2003-06-11T17:01:24Z")
> [@](#): > > I almost forgot to add in my post two above that Austin is so tolerant that homeless drag queen, Leslie Cochran, ran for mayor and received 7% of the votes. […] The only other place I can see anything remotely similar happening in the US is San Francisco. With the right press team, I think she could probably beat Mike Bloomberg here in NYC. ---
**Author:** ![Esprix](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/esprix/32/7899_2.png) [@Esprix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Esprix)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/30 "2003-06-11T17:21:46Z")
> [@](#): > > _Originally posted by **dorkusmalorkusmafia** _ > > As a former gay person in a big city… You’re not gay anymore? :eek: Esprix ---
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 5:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/31 "2003-06-11T17:57:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Esprix \* > \*\*I suddenly feel very, very old… > > _creaks away_ > > Esprix \*\* If it makes you feel any better, **Esprix** , my senior year in high school I was in a production of _Execution of Justice_ – the biggest show my high school ever put on. The whole cast was required to read _The Mayor of Castro Street_. So you’re not quite yet The Old Gay Man, babbling about people and events the young kids have long since forgotten. 😉 If I still count as a young kid, that is. I’m just graduated from college, and am feeling like Old Lady Lamia already. ---
**Author:** ![dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dorkusmalorkusmafia/32/7266_2.png) [@dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dorkusmalorkusmafia)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/32 "2003-06-11T18:15:41Z")
Whoops, still gay, no longer in big Texas cities. Forgive me sisters! I won’t tell the straight people out there about “the penance.” You know the one… The one when we forget that we are gay and tell the world? Yeah, that penance. ---
**Author:** ![Lucki\_Chaarms](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9de0a6/32.png) [@Lucki\_Chaarms](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucki_Chaarms)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/33 "2003-06-11T19:14:37Z")
nitpick, **dorkus** - Leslie is not homeless. Leslie lives in Westlake (the new-rich part of Austin). I understand that it’s just because someone felt like giving him a place to stay, but still, he’s doing better than most. I spoke to Leslie for quite a while during his mayoral campaign, he was out distributing leaflets for himself, and he stopped by our table at Flipnotics (local semi-hip coffee shop). I also put on a play a couple of weeks ago in a theater at 7th and Congress, so he was never far. Not a bad person, but more than a touch odd. But I think you’re right: Austin is a magnificent oasis of weird in the middle of a state that has a whole lot of great things about it, but tolerance is not high on that list. DFW has lots of culture and a pretty big gay scene (bigger than here, I’ll bet, but lower percentage-wise). I have no knowledge of the San Antonio scene, but based on feel alone, I bet if you knew where to look you could find plenty. But the point is, Austin is the only city in the state where you wouldn’t have to watch your back. LC ---
**Author:** ![dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dorkusmalorkusmafia/32/7266_2.png) [@dorkusmalorkusmafia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dorkusmalorkusmafia)\ **Post date:** [June 11, 2003, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/34 "2003-06-11T20:45:25Z")
That was my point Lucki. I have lived in San Antonio (good food, bad politics, bad police), Houson (good city, way too big, decent politics but so big that you can’t avoid swarms of assholes), Dallas (big gay scene but the surrounding areas keep Dallas from feeling completely safe), Corpus Christi (Cops there were the worst), and stayed for an extended period of time in Kingsville (a few months, small town in the valley = bad) and Del Rio (small town on the Mexico border also = bad). I have also lived in Austin, it was the only place I didn’t feel like I would get beat up for holding hands with my lover. Everywhere else, I had done it a few times to derisions such as “fags!” and even random police searches/detentions. ---
**Author:** ![Ooner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/c67d28/32.png) [@Ooner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ooner)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2003, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/35 "2003-06-12T04:13:11Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by KidCharlemagne \* > \*\*Does asking if someone is a “pitcher” or a “catcher” lack decorum? \*\* Only if you don’t know them. If you’re talking about sex type things and it’s a comfortable conversation, then sure, ask away. That’s just me though, I can easily understand why others might not be comfortable discussing it. ---
**Author:** ![Lucki\_Chaarms](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/9de0a6/32.png) [@Lucki\_Chaarms](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lucki_Chaarms)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2003, 5:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/36 "2003-06-12T05:14:12Z")
Just sort of a notice, I’m being admitted for surgery in about 6 hours, (don’t worry, very routine, not too big a deal), and I’m told that it’ll be about a week before I’m like, out of bed and sort of tooling around the house. I’m not sure how long I’ll be unable to use a 'puter, but I just wanted to tell you that I’m going to be disappearing from this thread for a while, and I didn’t want to be thought rude. The other factor keeping me from posting would be that I’ll be on a lot of pain meds, which would be likely to reduce the quality of anything I chose to post. Rather than that, I’ll probably just stay off for a while. LC ---
**Author:** ![Daoloth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/82dd89/32.png) [@Daoloth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Daoloth)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2003, 6:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/37 "2003-06-12T06:34:12Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by dorkusmalorkusmafia \* > \*\*As a former gay person in a big city (not Austin) in Texas, I can tell you about so much redneck harassment it isn’t funny. I had bad experiences in every big city in Texas for being gay, except for Austin. Austin is an oasis of culture for the rest of Texas, get over it. It is similar to how the democrats in Texas are like Republicans almost everywhere else. \*\* Apparently Houston wasn’t the city in question. ---
**Author:** ![musicguy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ba0ec/32.png) [@musicguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/musicguy)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2003, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/38 "2003-06-12T18:51:23Z")
Here’s wishing you a speedy recovery, **Lucki**! ---
**Author:** ![Scott\_Dickerson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f04885/32.png) [@Scott\_Dickerson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Dickerson)\ **Post date:** [June 12, 2003, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/39 "2003-06-12T20:14:06Z")
Yep, Lucki, good health to ya! Here’s a question. (I’ll probably start a thread on a related topic, but maybe you wouldn’t mind responding here.) I’ll guess that you’re somewhere in your late teens. Is there anything that an “older gay guy” (I’ll let you define the term) could do that would help you feel comfortable and relaxed around him? (And maybe him around you, too.) I’m asking because, back when I was pre-old, guys more than just a few years older always seemed to me to be unsexy father figures and more than a little offputting. Every physical flaw and wrinkle seemed magnified, every comment seemed forced, every question seemed stupid and invasive, every move seemed “yeah, he wants into my pants,” every reference to something current seemed calculated and patronizing… I think you get the idea. And these old codgers were under thirty! My guess is that a lot of “The” young can’t get around thinking of guys who are older as versions of their fathers, school teachers, religious figures (ie, God), and so on. It seems sad to have such a barrier in place–yet it also seems perfectly natural, and I honestly don’t see that anything can be done. (By the same token, I s’pose us venerable types impose a template over younger gay men based on the best bud they had in high school that they had a crush on, the prom they never went to, etc.) As you seem somewhat of a “thinker,” what are your thoughts on this? Obviously this is a very classic, heretofore-unsolved human problem… ---
**Author:** ![Snite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e0b2c6/32.png) [@Snite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Snite)\ **Post date:** [June 13, 2003, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958/40 "2003-06-13T00:30:00Z")
Other than Scott’s question, the only reason anyone else posted here was to be politically correct and to show their “support” for homosexuality. F\*\*\* that. This thread is bullshit. One post out of… 37 is legit? I feel that the whole purpose for this thread is bullshit also. Lucky(however you spell it) is just out for a little attention knowing he’ll get it and plenty of Heart-Felt Sympathy along with it. And Texas being a sea of rednecks? F\*\*\* you. I know we ain’t perfect, but don’t ever f\*\*\* with my State. Yeah, in some areas, the stereotype can be true/“true”, but that goes with every State in the country. Psychopachik Vampire [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-gay-kid/180958.md?page=3)