# Ask the Guy who has become Death, the Destroyer of Worlds

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [September 10, 2003, 4:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691 "2003-09-10T04:40:06Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 4

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**Author:** ![LurkMeister](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3da27b/32.png) [@LurkMeister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LurkMeister)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 12:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/61 "2003-09-11T12:52:19Z")

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Are you aware that there’s a guy named Remo Williams who’s claiming to be you?

Or is that one of your aliases?

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**Author:** ![EddyTeddyFreddy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eddyteddyfreddy/32/18796_2.png) [@EddyTeddyFreddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EddyTeddyFreddy)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 1:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/62 "2003-09-11T13:07:18Z")

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If you’re not allowed to be proud, can you at least be cocky?

Do you live in a charnel house? Is your library full of charnel knowledge?

When no one’s around, do you roll the bones?

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**Author:** ![slortar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@slortar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slortar)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/63 "2003-09-11T13:22:16Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Shiva418 \*  
> [snip]
> 
> I am the **tree eyed** lord of all that is; the Creator, Preserer, AND DESTROYER! Yet you, a mere mortal has the **gaul** to assume MY title!
> 
> We shall have to arm-wrestle for it.

What does a tree eyed person look like? I’m not convinced. You sound kinda wooden.

And I don’t think Andylicious is French…

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**Author:** ![Knowed\_Out](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/knowed_out/32/7380_2.png) [@Knowed\_Out](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Knowed_Out)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/64 "2003-09-11T13:35:32Z")

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Since you’ve opened up this thread, you can answer the question we’ve been pondering since Revelations…when is Armageddon? Who is the Antichrist going to be? Is Jack Chick right? And please don’t make any vague thief-in-the-night allusions. We want to know exact date, time and location for best seats.

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**Author:** ![Ich\_Bin\_s](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Ich\_Bin\_s](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ich_Bin_s)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 2:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/65 "2003-09-11T14:36:33Z")

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What’s your relationship with the Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come? The two of you seem to dress similarly, you’re equally soft-spoken, and then there’s the dramatic pointing. The only difference seems to be the absence of the scythe.

Are you, in fact, the GoCYTC? If so, is it a union thing that you’ve done this work largely uncredited?

If not, is he any relation to you? An underachieving sibling, for example?

Or are the two of you in the midst of a legal tangle for rights to the billowing dark cloak?

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**Author:** ![Peregrine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a6a055/32.png) [@Peregrine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peregrine)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/66 "2003-09-11T16:10:20Z")

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Can I have a drink from the River of Forgetfulness? I need to get that stupid Candyman song out of my head again.

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**Author:** ![Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satisfying_Andy_Licious)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/67 "2003-09-11T17:43:59Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by ArchiveGuy \*  
> \*\*What time does your mommy tuck you into bed? And what’s the name of your imaginary friend? \*\*

My mummy tucks me in at 8 every night. Mummy gives me cocoa and rubs my back until I fall asleep. I have the best mummy in the world. I stole it from the Valley of Kings.  
My imaginary friend is [url=http://www.screamteam.com/newpage/clownlaugh.jpg]Happy Sam Smiley,[/url who comes with me on my job to make the people laugh and make everything go nice.

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**Author:** ![Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satisfying_Andy_Licious)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/68 "2003-09-11T17:46:10Z")

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Happy Sam Smiley is my imaginary friend. But Preview is my real friend.

> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Satisfying Andy Licious \*  
> \*\*My mummy tucks me in at 8 every night. Mummy gives me cocoa and rubs my back until I fall asleep. I have the best mummy in the world. I stole it from the Valley of Kings.  
> My imaginary friend is [Happy Sam Smiley,](http://www.screamteam.com/newpage/clownlaugh.jpg) who comes with me on my job to make the people laugh and make everything go nice. \*\*

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**Author:** ![Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satisfying_Andy_Licious)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/69 "2003-09-11T17:48:15Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by tisiphone \*  
> \*\*Hmmmm.
> 
> Pardon my impiety, however…isn’t the phrase supposed to be “I am created Shiva, the Destroyer! Death, Shatterer of Worlds!”  
> \*\*

I tried saying it that way once when I wanted to make a big, dramatic entrance. Then I got stuck on “Shatterer – erer – erer – erer.” I sounded like my old Buick trying to start.

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**Author:** ![Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satisfying_Andy_Licious)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/70 "2003-09-11T17:52:30Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by EddyTeddyFreddy \*  
> **Do you have a sidekick? A dumb young comical sidekick, or a wise old comical sidekick?**

My imaginary friend is [Happy Sam Smiley.](http://www.screamteam.com/newpage/clownlaugh.jpg) My real friend is Preview.

> [@](#):
>
> \*\*Why don’t you put Pale out to pasture and ride Binky? \*\*

Because “And Death Came Riding Binky” lacks a certain gravitas.

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**Author:** ![Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satisfying_Andy_Licious)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/71 "2003-09-11T17:56:37Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Ranchoth \*  
> \*\*Are you, by any chance, a “Goth”?
> 
> Or do you spend time kneeling on top of a charred hillside, head thrown back, eys closed but streaming tears, arms outstretched, and howling in utter grief and anguish as “Adagio for Strings” plays in the background? \*\*

I was Goth before it was cool.

Try going to school as the _only_ kid with a pale white death’s head. Kids today have it easy.

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**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/72 "2003-09-11T18:03:13Z")

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I’m thinking the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come _definitely_ isn’t married.

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**Author:** ![Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/50afbb/32.png) [@Satisfying\_Andy\_Licious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satisfying_Andy_Licious)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/73 "2003-09-11T18:13:27Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Muldoon’s Squishiness \*  
> \*\*Have you come about the reaping?
> 
> Do you prefer to be called Death, Mr. Death, the Grim Reaper or something else?\*\*

I am Death. I am the end, the master of the pit. Charon. Friends call me Andy.

Just don’t call me the ferryman or I’ll really get pissed.

> [@](#):
>
> \*\*Do you like bunnies? \*\*

Yeah. Especially Miss April.

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**Author:** ![Ponder\_Stibbons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponder_stibbons/32/343_2.png) [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 6:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/74 "2003-09-11T18:19:36Z")

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You know, it’s a good thing you’ve moved up in the world. Back when you were **Uncomfortable Silence, Killer of Conversations** you caused me a lot of trouble! I was going to file a complaint with the committee, but what with your new position and all, I wouldn’t dare. Nope, it wouldn’t do to draw attention to myself _at all_ … Oh, wait a minute … :eek:

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**Author:** ![evilhomer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/43a26b/32.png) [@evilhomer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/evilhomer)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/75 "2003-09-11T18:49:48Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by tisiphone \*  
> \*\*Oh yeah, **GIGObuster** , the dwarf that Shiva stands on is named Ignorance, AFAIK. I haven’t heard the story yet, so I can’t summarize for you, sorry. Other than of course, Shiva destroys Ignorance as part of his job as well. \*\*

Ok, now I’m confused. **Cecil Adams** is Shiva? So calling him “the World’s smartest human being” is kind of misleading, isn’t it? And what about this:

> [@](#):
>
> I am the end, the master of the pit

Does that mean you’re a mod? Is the entire Straight Dope run by Shiva? I’ve seen pictures of Shiva with four arms, but it’s still got to be tough keeping on top of everything. Or is Cecil Shiva, and Death is a moderator in the Pit?

I think I need to go lie down.

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**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/76 "2003-09-11T20:23:17Z")

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I’m thinking the Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come _definitely_ isn’t married.

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**Author:** ![Waenara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/50afbb/32.png) [@Waenara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Waenara)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/77 "2003-09-11T20:54:42Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*\* Hah! Five bucks won’t get you Death, the Destroyer of Squirrels.\*\*

What about Death of Mice?

And why don’t you TALK LIKE THIS, IN ALL CAPS. I would have thought that Death would have a more intimidating voice.

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**Author:** ![Ich\_Bin\_s](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Ich\_Bin\_s](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ich_Bin_s)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/78 "2003-09-11T21:29:05Z")

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I’m getting the impression that Ludovic is pretty certain the Ghost of Christmas Yet To Come is not, in fact, married.

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**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 11:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/79 "2003-09-11T23:15:45Z")

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What would the world be like if Hitler was still alive? (obscure Family Guy reference)

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**Author:** ![panamajack](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/47e85d/32.png) [@panamajack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panamajack)\
**Post date:** [September 11, 2003, 11:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-who-has-become-death-the-destroyer-of-worlds/200691/80 "2003-09-11T23:46:04Z")

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Was Edward Teller surprised by the lack of irony when it turned out to be _you_?

Also, where’s your sting?

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