# Ask the guy who's been to 41 weddings
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-whos-been-to-41-weddings/681269
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [February 13, 2014, 6:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-whos-been-to-41-weddings/681269 "2014-02-13T18:46:38Z")
**Posts on this page:** 14
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@Ellis\_Aponte\_Jr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellis_Aponte_Jr)
#### Post date: [February 16, 2014, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-whos-been-to-41-weddings/681269/21 "2014-02-16T22:23:35Z")
Two more:
1. From a planning standpoint, what’s the one thing you recommend people NEVER do at their receptions?
2. Of all the mishaps you’ve witnessed, which was the most worthy of America’s Funniest Home Videos?
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### Author:  [@Rune](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rune)
#### Post date: [February 16, 2014, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-whos-been-to-41-weddings/681269/22 "2014-02-16T22:51:58Z")
Have anyone ever said anything after the vicar came with the speech “speak now or hold your tongue forever,” or is that something vicars only say in movies?
Of the 82, did anyone change their mind at the altar and decided to say no?
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### Author:  [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)
#### Post date: [February 16, 2014, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-whos-been-to-41-weddings/681269/23 "2014-02-16T23:41:19Z")
> [@thelurkinghorror](#):
>
> How many (or rough percentages) were open bars? Cash bars? Sad, humorless teetotaler weddings?
At least 75% were open bars, at least for part of the night. Exactly one was no-bar, but that was because the location didn’t serve alcohol. The bride and groom actively encouraged people to bring flasks and the like. I don’t think I’d enjoy a dry wedding at all.
> [@Ellis\_Aponte\_Jr](#):
>
> Which songs are the biggest dance floor fillers?
>
> Conversely, what’s the most bizarre song you can remember getting played?
Ooh, an easy one: songs where they tell you how to dance. The Electric Slide, the [Cha-Cha Slide](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cb6pJ4AEOoI), and the [Cupid Shuffle](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h24_zoqu4_Q&feature=kp).
Not bizarre in and of itself, I guess, but at one wedding the bride got hammered and insisted that the DJ play [Like a G6](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4s6H4ku6ZY&feature=kp) over and over again - like at least six times. Then at a more recent wedding the DJ played [I’m On a Boat](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7yfISlGLNU&feature=kp) so the groom and his college buddies could sing along and perform a dance number they had cooked up to it.
Probably the best song I can remember being played was [A Kiss Before You Leave Me](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSe1Takt5FU), just because the groom was a huge fan of _Fallout_. I suspect the two of us may have been the only people who “got it”.
> [@Ellis\_Aponte\_Jr](#):
>
> Two more:
>
> 1. From a planning standpoint, what’s the one thing you recommend people NEVER do at their receptions?
>
> 2. Of all the mishaps you’ve witnessed, which was the most worthy of America’s Funniest Home Videos?
Don’t have your reception (or ceremony) on a public beach. We went to a wedding in Fort Lauderdale on a public beach which was roped off for the occasion. However, the city didn’t rope off enough beach and a large crowd of hecklers gathered to shout “don’t do it” and other witticisms. That wasn’t so bad, but then a guy threw a bag of Doritos toward the altar to get seagulls to gather. That was fucking awful. Come to think of it, don’t have the reception outdoors, ever, unless there is an equally large indoor reception space right there for bad weather.
In the funny-but-uncomfortable category, there’s the bride who had stage fright and couldn’t get the words “I do” out for a good 15-20 seconds. We all thought she was going to run from the altar but it was just nerves.
In the just-funny category there was the bride who came down the aisle in a dark cloak and witch’s hat to _Back in Black_, then threw them off halfway so her dad could walk her the rest of the way in the traditional white gown. Also, the 76-year-old minister who performed the [Stanky Leg](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RiSrd9i2PCw) and other assorted hip-hop routines with his daughter - for their father/daughter dance.
> [@Rune](#):
>
> Have anyone ever said anything after the vicar came with the speech “speak now or hold your tongue forever,” or is that something vicars only say in movies?
>
> Of the 82, did anyone change their mind at the altar and decided to say no?
The “let them speak now” bit has only been done at one or two of the ceremonies. I think they were both traditional Catholic weddings.
As to the latter, no, but one wedding was cancelled a week prior because the groom backed out.
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### Author:  [@thelurkinghorror](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thelurkinghorror)
#### Post date: [February 17, 2014, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-whos-been-to-41-weddings/681269/24 "2014-02-17T00:18:41Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#):
>
> I don’t think I’d enjoy a dry wedding at all.
There’s another reason for weddings? :eek:. The only one I’ve heard of (I didn’t go) was a mixed Mormon-Catholic wedding. It was easy to tell what side of the family you were on.
> [@](#):
>
> Probably the best song I can remember being played was [A Kiss Before You Leave Me](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PSe1Takt5FU), just because the groom was a huge fan of _Fallout_. I suspect the two of us may have been the only people who “got it”.
I like “[Maybe](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wp2Hwi9qM48&feature=kp)” better but I can see how that wouldn’t be appropriate at a wedding. I don’t plan on ever having a big wedding if I can help it, but I’d love to play “[the Rains of Castamere](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sa9CvDPXYNI).” It should be easy to tell who “gets it.”
I saw one beach wedding. At least in Tahoe onlookers were respectful, if gawking too much. I’ve attended a few that were on the water, but usually grass. Sand sounds awful.
> [@](#):
>
> The “let them speak now” bit has only been done at one or two of the ceremonies. I think they were both traditional Catholic weddings.
[Recentish thread](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=699666).
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### Author:  [@Ellis\_Aponte\_Jr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ellis_Aponte_Jr)
#### Post date: [February 17, 2014, 12:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-whos-been-to-41-weddings/681269/25 "2014-02-17T00:36:17Z")
Great answers, thanks. I like the Doritos and seagulls story.
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### Author:  [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)
#### Post date: [February 17, 2014, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-whos-been-to-41-weddings/681269/26 "2014-02-17T21:49:50Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#):
>
> I’m going to #42 on March 1st, and #43 on March 23rd.
You seem to be open on March 15, my daughter’s wedding date. Want to make it 44?
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### Author:  [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)
#### Post date: [February 17, 2014, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-whos-been-to-41-weddings/681269/27 "2014-02-17T22:44:16Z")
Did you get any crass remarks after the 37th wedding?
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### Author:  [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)
#### Post date: [January 29, 2018, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-whos-been-to-41-weddings/681269/28 "2018-01-29T21:01:20Z")
Bumping this thread to note that I am now up to 49, and I will be officiating #50 next month 🙂
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### Author:  [@Sir\_T-Cups](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sir_T-Cups)
#### Post date: [January 29, 2018, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-whos-been-to-41-weddings/681269/29 "2018-01-29T21:36:34Z")
I don’t know how much has changed since you started this thread, but you said a majority of them were where you live, which is now where I live, so I’m curious: What’s the most popular location around Orlando that people get married in?
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### Author:  [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)
#### Post date: [January 29, 2018, 9:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-whos-been-to-41-weddings/681269/30 "2018-01-29T21:50:11Z")
> [@Sir\_T-Cups](#):
>
> I don’t know how much has changed since you started this thread, but you said a majority of them were where you live, which is now where I live, so I’m curious: What’s the most popular location around Orlando that people get married in?
There are surprisingly few places where more than one wedding I attended was held. One was the [Lake Mary Events Center](http://www.lakemaryeventscenter.com/), where I actually attended two the same weekend (one Saturday, one Sunday) and a third a few years later.
Another is [Tuskawilla Country Club](http://www.tuscawillacc.com/), where I attended one of the first out of the 49 in 2005, and where my wife and I got married in 2010.
Two were in the Disney Wedding Pavilion, though I think it was called the Disney Wedding Chapel back then (and though marrying at Disney World is not to my taste, I have to admit the chapel is quite beautiful).
Two were at the Mission Inn in Mount Dora - if my memory doesn’t fail me, you had a girlfriend who worked there.
I think there were two at [Leu Gardens](https://www.leugardens.org/), but I only remember one of them. We may have turned down an invitation to one that was there.
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### Author:  [@Sir\_T-Cups](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sir_T-Cups)
#### Post date: [January 29, 2018, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-whos-been-to-41-weddings/681269/31 "2018-01-29T22:10:44Z")
> [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](#):
>
> There are surprisingly few places where more than one wedding I attended was held. One was the [Lake Mary Events Center](http://www.lakemaryeventscenter.com/), where I actually attended two the same weekend (one Saturday, one Sunday) and a third a few years later.
>
> Another is [Tuskawilla Country Club](http://www.tuscawillacc.com/), where I attended one of the first out of the 49 in 2005, and where my wife and I got married in 2010.
>
> Two were in the Disney Wedding Pavilion, though I think it was called the Disney Wedding Chapel back then (and though marrying at Disney World is not to my taste, I have to admit the chapel is quite beautiful).
>
> Two were at the Mission Inn in Mount Dora - if my memory doesn’t fail me, you had a girlfriend who worked there.
>
> I think there were two at [Leu Gardens](https://www.leugardens.org/), but I only remember one of them. We may have turned down an invitation to one that was there.
Damn dude that’s a HELL of a memory. Mrs. Cups worked caddy corner to Mission Inn when she moved here, it’s what brought her down here, but that was over 3 years ago and I probably mentioned it, like, once. Props to you.
We had that course on our list of places to visit when we were looking at venues but we never made it out there, Universal’s appeal was just too much 🙂
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### Author:  [@samclem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/samclem)
#### Post date: [January 30, 2018, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-whos-been-to-41-weddings/681269/32 "2018-01-30T00:39:54Z")
Did you choose your screen name as a sop to your affinity to attending so many weddings? :rolleyes:
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### Author:  [@snfaulkner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snfaulkner)
#### Post date: [January 30, 2018, 1:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-whos-been-to-41-weddings/681269/33 "2018-01-30T01:06:41Z")
How many murders are acceptable when the chicken dance/electric slide gets played?
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### Author:  [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)
#### Post date: [January 30, 2018, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-guy-whos-been-to-41-weddings/681269/34 "2018-01-30T01:58:56Z")
When I got married the “speak now or forever hold your peace” was NOT part of the ceremony. But after the vows had been spoken the minister told us “If you know anything which would alienate your union, let it now be left behind to the mercy of God” And the congregation was cautioned that if “anyone seeks to divide their heart and soul from each other, let them do so at the peril of offending a creation of God.”
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