# Ask the man who knows nothing **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 6, 2012, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323 "2012-06-06T22:39:39Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Alonzo\_John\_Blitz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@Alonzo\_John\_Blitz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alonzo_John_Blitz)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2012, 10:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/1 "2012-06-06T22:39:39Z")
Is this the right forum? Ask the man who knows nothing. Might not get back to you right away, 'cause I probably won’t know how to find this thread. But, carry on. Should be one or two of you with the same credentials. ---
**Author:** ![Senegoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senegoid/32/6606_2.png) [@Senegoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Senegoid)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2012, 10:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/2 "2012-06-06T22:46:00Z")
Once upon a time I _thought_ I knew nothing . . . Then one day, I LEARNED SOMETHING !!! I learned that I had it right the first time. So now I know exactly ONE thing, namely that I know ZERO things. [sub]Don’t ask for details, because I don’t know any.[/sub] (Wasn’t there a movie once that featured a scarecrow like this?) ---
**Author:** ![HoboStew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/f17d59/32.png) [@HoboStew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HoboStew)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2012, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/3 "2012-06-06T22:48:12Z")
What exactly don’t you know? ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2012, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/4 "2012-06-06T22:51:19Z")
Where are my car keys? ---
**Author:** ![not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_what_you_d_expect/32/3246_2.png) [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_what_you_d_expect)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2012, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/5 "2012-06-06T22:52:51Z")
What is the secret to a happy life? ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2012, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/6 "2012-06-06T22:57:46Z")
What price bananas? Are you my angel? ---
**Author:** ![Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@Maggie\_the\_Ocelot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maggie_the_Ocelot)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2012, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/7 "2012-06-06T23:03:00Z")
How many potatoes? ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2012, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/8 "2012-06-06T23:20:55Z")
What time is it? ---
**Author:** ![Rico](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rico/32/3582_2.png) [@Rico](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rico)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2012, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/9 "2012-06-06T23:30:59Z")
Do you know that you don’t know anything? Because if you do then you know something. (wanders off, head explodes…) ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [June 6, 2012, 11:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/10 "2012-06-06T23:49:03Z")
Sgt. Schultz? Is that you? – Commandant Klink ---
**Author:** ![Simple\_Linctus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Simple\_Linctus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simple_Linctus)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2012, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/11 "2012-06-07T00:10:46Z")
what is not the meaning of life? ---
**Author:** ![campp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@campp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/campp)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2012, 12:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/12 "2012-06-07T00:35:01Z")
Are you registered to vote? ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2012, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/13 "2012-06-07T00:40:41Z")
Whatta ya know? mmm ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2012, 1:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/14 "2012-06-07T01:17:11Z")
nm ---
**Author:** ![ShelliBean](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f9ae1b/32.png) [@ShelliBean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShelliBean)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2012, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/15 "2012-06-07T02:32:12Z")
Go back to the wall, Jon Snow. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2012, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/16 "2012-06-07T02:35:40Z")
How many fingers am I holding up? ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2012, 2:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/17 "2012-06-07T02:42:20Z")
'Sup? ---
**Author:** ![Lumpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lumpy/32/446_2.png) [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2012, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/18 "2012-06-07T17:48:52Z")
You’re a Nativist? ---
**Author:** ![Alonzo\_John\_Blitz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/85e7bf/32.png) [@Alonzo\_John\_Blitz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alonzo_John_Blitz)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2012, 6:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/19 "2012-06-07T18:21:09Z")
Thank you all for responding. I don’t know who you are, but I’m sure you’re very nice people. Well, no… I don’t really know that, either. In the short time since I started this thread the boundaries of my ignorance have spread to include ‘I haven’t a clue’, ‘Couldn’t tell you’, and ‘Better ask him’. I’m hoping for a trail of bread crumbs to lead me to a conclusion, but not holding my breath. ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [June 7, 2012, 6:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323/20 "2012-06-07T18:30:45Z")
Someone, maybe it was Socrates, said that a wise man is one who knows what he doesn’t know. My question to you is: are you a wise man? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-man-who-knows-nothing/624323.md?page=2)