# Ask the Middle Aged Curmudgeon **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 11, 2010, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325 "2010-07-11T20:11:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![KennerTheGreat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/a8b319/32.png) [@KennerTheGreat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KennerTheGreat)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2010, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/21 "2010-07-11T21:41:09Z")
Is there a line, age or otherwise, between being a curmudgeon and being an old coot? ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2010, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/22 "2010-07-11T21:42:38Z")
> [@picunurse](#): > > Siddown and shudup, old man, if you want lunch. > > (Courtesy of the curmudgeonly old woman) šŸ˜ƒ Lunch? Made by an actual woman that doesnā€™t mind? I reckon I could take the garbage out before the game or at halftime for that. Got any bugs you need squished or jars opened? ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2010, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/23 "2010-07-11T21:44:42Z")
> [@Chefguy](#): > > Amateur! I have a shiny red ā€œNo Solicitorsā€ sign stuck to my mailbox. Woe betide the college kid with a petition. But doesnt that also drive away a curmudeonā€™s best friend, the ā€œworkingā€ woman? ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2010, 9:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/24 "2010-07-11T21:45:05Z")
> [@KennerTheGreat](#): > > Is there a line, age or otherwise, between being a curmudgeon and being an old coot? Old Coots can do ā€œpull my fingerā€ to young innocents with impunity. Curmudgeons still have to blame the dog if women are present. ---
**Author:** ![Enuma\_Elish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5e9695/32.png) [@Enuma\_Elish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enuma_Elish)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2010, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/25 "2010-07-11T21:51:15Z")
Are you not answering the beer question because you are afraid a bunch of kids will see it, decide they like your brand, and raid the big round-door 1950ā€™s beer fridge in your garage? ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2010, 9:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/26 "2010-07-11T21:52:32Z")
> [@billfish678](#): > > But doesnt that also drive away a curmudeonā€™s best friend, the ā€œworkingā€ woman? At my age and disposition, the only working gals I have any real interest in are the Dealers, or the ones that bring me food or booze. I tip them well, and they flirt a little. Maybe next time, they remember what I order, and slip me a piece of cake on the house. Or they accidentally pour a double, and hate to be wasteful. Or the Dealers get the Pit Boss to summon the drink girl, because they know Iā€™ll be needing bourbon & coke while I play. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2010, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/27 "2010-07-11T21:53:08Z")
Do you live in a castle and wear suits of armor? Are you looking forward to the Renaissance? ---
**Author:** ![mascaroni](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/dc4da7/32.png) [@mascaroni](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mascaroni)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2010, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/28 "2010-07-11T21:53:17Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > Old Coots can do ā€œpull my fingerā€ to young innocents with impunity. Curmudgeons still have to blame the dog if women are present. Donā€™t do it in the kitchen thenā€¦ ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2010, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/29 "2010-07-11T22:00:21Z")
> [@Enuma\_Elish](#): > > Are you not answering the beer question because you are afraid a bunch of kids will see it, decide they like your brand, and raid the big round-door 1950ā€™s beer fridge in your garage? No, because I live a a stand your ground/castle doctrine state, which means if I catch kids steeling my beer, I can whip their ass. Or worse, put em to work in the yard. Without any candy ass Ipodtweetermybook crap distracting them from tending my damn lawn. And I answered the beer question. Beer should be regular, and cold. Unless itā€™s English or German and dark, it which case it can be room temperature. ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2010, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/30 "2010-07-11T22:03:11Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > Do you live in a castle and wear suits of armor? Are you looking forward to the Renaissance? My home is my castle. My armor hasnā€™t been shiny in decades. My Noble Steed is actually a lawnmower. Dulcinea turned out to be a lesbian. And yet I keep tilting at windmills. Which are clearly designed by loud young lawn abusers. And I am not looking forward to the Renaissance. Change is bad. Look what the Designated Hitter rule did to baseball. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2010, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/31 "2010-07-11T23:00:29Z")
> [@picunurse](#): > > Siddown and shudup, old man, if you want lunch. > > (Courtesy of the curmudgeonly old woman) šŸ˜ƒ ā€œOld man, if you give my food the dog one more time, Iā€™m gonna kick you till youā€™re dead.ā€ ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2010, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/32 "2010-07-11T23:04:56Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > I reckon I could take the garbage out before the game or at halftime for that. Got any bugs you need squished or jars opened? Do you date much? How often to you get anā€¦er, make whoopie? ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2010, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/33 "2010-07-11T23:16:45Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > Do you date much? > How often to you get anā€¦er, make whoopie? I may be a curmudgeon, but I am also a Southern Gentleman. We donā€™t post about such things. Unless weā€™re drunk. Which Iā€™m not. Yet. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2010, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/34 "2010-07-11T23:18:43Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > I may be a curmudgeon, but I am also a Southern Gentleman. We donā€™t post about such things. Unless weā€™re drunk. Which Iā€™m not. Yet. I beg your pardon, Sir. :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2010, 11:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/35 "2010-07-11T23:21:03Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#): > > I beg your pardon, Sir. > :rolleyes: Now see? Thatā€™s mannerly. Well, except rolling eyes guy, which I choose to overlook. The world needs more mannerly behavior. Or legalized dueling. ---
**Author:** ![Enuma\_Elish](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/5e9695/32.png) [@Enuma\_Elish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Enuma_Elish)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2010, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/36 "2010-07-12T01:26:55Z")
Have you ever actually yelled these words: ā€œGet off my lawn you stupid kids!ā€ or any reasonable variation ofā€¦ ---
**Author:** ![kidneyfailure](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9f8e36/32.png) [@kidneyfailure](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kidneyfailure)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2010, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/37 "2010-07-12T01:47:20Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > And I answered the beer question. Beer should be regular, and cold. **Unless itā€™s English or German** and dark, it which case it can be room temperature. What? You mean you actually pay heed to those Brit panty-waists whose asses we saved and them damn Kraut sausage-eaters whose asses we kicked? Iā€™m disappointed, thatā€™s not curmudgeonly enough. ---
**Author:** ![swampbear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampbear/32/467_2.png) [@swampbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampbear)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2010, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/38 "2010-07-12T02:00:25Z")
> [@Oakminster](#): > > Iā€™m middle-aged and grumpy. I watch football, eat red meat, probably cancel your vote most elections, smoke, drink, screw, gamble, curse, used to own guns prior to that tragic boating accident, and otherwise enjoy being thoroughly, unabashedly male and heterosexual. Got me a riding lawnmower, weedeater, leaf blower, hammers, axes, shovels, tents, knives, fishing poles, big ass TV, and just a plain old big ass. > > Ask whatever you want, but stay off my damn lawn. And turn that shakey-booty music down. Hell, except for the heteorsexual part you could be me then! Wanna come over and hang out at my pool big boy? The backyard is privacy fenced so the neighbors wonā€™t know if our bathing suits ā€œaccidentallyā€ slip off in the pool. I got beer! Real beer! ---
**Author:** ![ExTank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/35a633/32.png) [@ExTank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ExTank)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2010, 2:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/39 "2010-07-12T02:31:20Z")
> [@kidneyfailure](#): > > What? You mean you actually pay heed to those Brit panty-waists whose asses we saved and them damn Kraut sausage-eaters whose asses we kicked? Iā€™m disappointed, thatā€™s not curmudgeonly enough. While you cetainly have something resembling a point, and speaking only for myself here, good beer is good beer. Germans didnā€™t invent it, but they went a long way towards perfecting it. The Brits do pretty damned well by the stuff, too. As someone who was damned near weaned on Anheuser-Busch products (my mom worked at the St. Louis brewery for 29 years), I have to honestly say that, for the most part, American mass-produced beers just donā€™t stand up to European brews. ---
**Author:** ![j666](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9de0a6/32.png) [@j666](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/j666)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2010, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325/40 "2010-07-12T02:36:44Z")
Can you explain the riding lawnmower to me? Itā€™s hard to hone, louder than those damned subwoofers, and means you have to buy a treadmill, too (or you will not achieve cootdum). And itā€™s slower! You have a leaf-blower, too, donā€™t you? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-middle-aged-curmudgeon/546325.md?page=3)