# Ask the Protocol Droid
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [November 5, 2007, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264 "2007-11-05T05:20:54Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2007, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/21 "2007-11-05T17:51:47Z")
[QUOTE=Ravenman]
Do protocol droids ever change their appearance to suit events they attend? For example, shouldn’t an expert in protocol – robotic or not – know that it would be a faux pas to appear the same if in attendance at a casual breakfast, semiformal dinner, and formal ball?
[/QUOTE]
An excellent question. Some particularly fastidious or fashion-conscious masters on some worlds - a distinct minority, mind you - have clothing or decorative detachable polyalloy plating for their protocol droids, but this is usually regarded as “gilding the lily,” if you will, or even risible. A clean, well-polished protocol droid is both presentable and welcome anywhere, on virtually any occasion, in my extensive experience.
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### Author:  [@brewha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brewha)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2007, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/22 "2007-11-05T18:02:13Z")
On which planet were you made? And how old of a civilization made you? How close do you think us Earthlings are to making AI?
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### Author:  [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2007, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/23 "2007-11-05T18:04:15Z")
What is the spectrum of Protocol Droid owners weighted towards? Dignitaries, crooks, traders, or celebrities? Is there a legal module for the Protocol Droid series?
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### Author:  [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2007, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/24 "2007-11-05T18:29:43Z")
At formal dinner parties, who went in to dinner first: Princess Leia, or Pooja Naberrie?
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2007, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/25 "2007-11-05T18:35:58Z")
[QUOTE=brewha]
On which planet were you made? And how old of a civilization made you? How close do you think us Earthlings are to making AI?
[/QUOTE]
I was made on Najima Prime, the homeworld of a very old civilization indeed (and even more so now). From what I’ve seen in my brief sojourn on your charming world, I should venture to guess that you will achieve artificial intelligence in approximately forty years, if all goes well and you don’t destroy yourself first. No offense intended.
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2007, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/26 "2007-11-05T18:38:20Z")
[QUOTE=E-Sabbath]
What is the spectrum of Protocol Droid owners weighted towards? Dignitaries, crooks, traders, or celebrities? Is there a legal module for the Protocol Droid series?
[/QUOTE]
The first and the fourth, overall, although you will of course find us virtually everywhere in one capacity or another. Yes, there is a legal module, which is an optional programming feature. As it happens, I have it, and have found it quite useful over the years.
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### Author:  [@Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boozahol_Squid_P.I)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2007, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/27 "2007-11-05T18:47:33Z")
[QUOTE=Elendil’s Heir]
A particularly loathesome insult in the High Gordalnian tongue. Not something you’d ever say in polite company.
[/QUOTE]
Another curiosity. The single example of a protocol droid that we know of was infamously bad at knowing how to deal with himself and others in situations that weren’t very formal. Why isn’t dealing with ‘impolite’ company included in your software?
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2007, 6:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/28 "2007-11-05T18:51:49Z")
[QUOTE=Duck Duck Goose]
At formal dinner parties, who went in to dinner first: Princess Leia, or Pooja Naberrie?
[/QUOTE]
That would depend upon where the dinner party was taking place and by whom it was hosted, of course. As a general matter, Princess Leia would hold higher status. As planetary royalty, she ranked Pooja Naberrie. At Imperial functions before the dissolution of the Senate, both would hold roughly equal status as senators (Leia from Alderaan, and Naberrie from Naboo), although Leia would there also have the advantage of seniority in the Senate as well as being from a more populous world. And as president of the New Republic, Leia was unquestionably first in any respectable list of precedence. From what I saw, however, neither woman was so obsessed with status as to let it get in the way of their friendship.
In various cultures, status hinges upon age, parentage or ancestry, wealth, past military or other socially-valued exploits, physical appearance (beauty, height, physical fitness, skin color, etc.), religious or political affiliation, sexual athleticism or orientation, fame, odor or lack thereof, Force sensitivity, manner of dress, language skills, and so on, easily tens of thousands of different factors. Part of my job is to know which is the determinative factor or factors, no matter where my master or mistress is.
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2007, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/29 "2007-11-05T18:56:09Z")
[QUOTE=Diomedes]
Another curiosity. The single example of a protocol droid that we know of was infamously bad at knowing how to deal with himself and others in situations that weren’t very formal. Why isn’t dealing with ‘impolite’ company included in your software?
[/QUOTE]
If you refer to C-3PO, as **Elendil’s Heir** agrees you do, I believe he may have had some, shall we say, professional lapses caused by the various reprogrammings and memory wipes which he underwent (dare I say “suffered through”?) over his many years of service. I knew him well and considered him a friend, and flatter myself that the feeling was mutual, but he was by no means perfect. Who is? Certainly not me.
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### Author:  [@Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Otto)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2007, 7:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/30 "2007-11-05T19:03:06Z")
I thought the thread title was “Ask the Protocol _Druid_.”
Color me disappointed.
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### Author:  [@Kuboydal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kuboydal)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2007, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/31 "2007-11-05T19:04:45Z")
Who or what is your favorite fictional robot?
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### Author:  [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2007, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/32 "2007-11-05T19:26:36Z")
Nothing to see here, my bad post :rolleyes:
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2007, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/33 "2007-11-05T21:10:02Z")
[QUOTE=Otto]
I thought the thread title was “Ask the Protocol _Druid_.”
Color me disappointed.
[/QUOTE]
My apologies, sir.
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2007, 9:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/34 "2007-11-05T21:11:53Z")
[QUOTE=Kuboydal]
Who or what is your favorite fictional robot?
[/QUOTE]
Having reviewed Earth’s media and popular entertainment quite intensively since my arrival, I would have to say that C-3PO is my favorite. Of course, he wasn’t fictional, but since he’s apparently widely seen that way on this planet, for purposes of answering your question, I will treat him as such.
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### Author:  [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2007, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/35 "2007-11-05T21:13:41Z")
[QUOTE=carnivorousplant]
Nothing to see here, my bad post :rolleyes:
[/QUOTE]
Not at all, sir.
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### Author:  [@Giles](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giles)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2007, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/36 "2007-11-05T21:49:11Z")
Are you a sentient being, or are you just programmed to act as if you were?
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### Author:  [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)
#### Post date: [November 5, 2007, 11:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/37 "2007-11-05T23:36:26Z")
Please translate the following:
> [@](#):
>
> Ba-WHEEP-gra-na-WHEEP-ninnibong!
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### Author:  [@Lumpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lumpy)
#### Post date: [November 6, 2007, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/38 "2007-11-06T03:14:44Z")
Isn’t being asked to interface with a starship’s computer to perform an engineering diagnostic rather a … _crude_ task for a protocol droid?
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### Author:  [@MacTech](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MacTech)
#### Post date: [November 6, 2007, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/39 "2007-11-06T03:57:36Z")
[QUOTE=Bosda Di’Chi of Tricor]
Please translate the following:
Ba-WHEEP-gra-na-WHEEP-ninnibong!
[/QUOTE]
Heck, I don’t even speak Astromech, but that clearly means…
We want…A Shrubbery! \
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### Author:  [@panamajack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panamajack)
#### Post date: [November 6, 2007, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-protocol-droid/425264/40 "2007-11-06T04:13:26Z")
What are the odds against Christmas?
Do you like bells?
(if you have no idea what that means, count yourself lucky.)
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