# Ask the Psychic **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 21, 2003, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977 "2003-09-21T15:25:32Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Shai\_tan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Shai\_tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shai_tan)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2003, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/1 "2003-09-21T15:25:32Z")
Due to a freak accident involving a rubberband, a radio-active possum, and Micheal Bolton - I have developed a certain psychic ability. I will now use that gift to answer questions for posters _before they actually post…_ I will attempt to answer them sequentially, i.e. answer the post which will immediately follow mine, prior to moving on to the next one. Okay… relaxing… relaxing… and… go… **Yes. Check your top left desk drawer.** ---
**Author:** ![jjimm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba8739/32.png) [@jjimm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jjimm)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2003, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/2 "2003-09-21T15:27:32Z")
Where did I put that zip disk? This is truly incredible. ---
**Author:** ![Shai\_tan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Shai\_tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shai_tan)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2003, 3:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/3 "2003-09-21T15:29:19Z")
Just trying to help out… **You should probably see a doctor. The left one is infected.** ---
**Author:** ![SpyderWoman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc8723/32.png) [@SpyderWoman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpyderWoman)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2003, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/4 "2003-09-21T15:32:01Z")
Dammit, I just knew something was wrong. My left eyebrow has been perpetually arched for weeks now. ---
**Author:** ![Musicat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/musicat/32/20189_2.png) [@Musicat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Musicat)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2003, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/5 "2003-09-21T15:34:07Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Shai’tan \* > You should probably see a doctor. The left one is infected. Which honey should I take to bed tonight – the one on the right or on the left? ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2003, 3:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/6 "2003-09-21T15:35:56Z")
Oooh! Oooh! I’ve got psychic powers too! Really! See… **Scott Baio, but it was a long time ago.** ---
**Author:** ![Shai\_tan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Shai\_tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shai_tan)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2003, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/7 "2003-09-21T15:36:05Z")
_nods sympathetically_ 1,365. But don’t eat them all at once. ---
**Author:** ![Shai\_tan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Shai\_tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shai_tan)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2003, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/8 "2003-09-21T15:39:28Z")
Damn coding… (and Scott Baio? Honey. I’m sorry. He only LOOKED like Scott Baio…) ---
**Author:** ![SlickRoenick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e68b1a/32.png) [@SlickRoenick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SlickRoenick)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/9 "2003-09-22T06:20:17Z")
How many candy-coated marbles are in my mom’s underwear drawer? ---
**Author:** ![Shai\_tan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Shai\_tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shai_tan)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 6:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/10 "2003-09-22T06:31:12Z")
delightful. **I refuse to answer the question. I once had one lodged in my nostril, and their “hotline associate” was not very sympathetic…** ---
**Author:** ![Stage\_Manager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stage_manager/32/7267_2.png) [@Stage\_Manager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stage_Manager)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 6:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/11 "2003-09-22T06:37:50Z")
Amazing. How can I clean my lucky golf ball? ---
**Author:** ![Shai\_tan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Shai\_tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shai_tan)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/12 "2003-09-22T06:41:43Z")
Astounding isn’t it? The whistling in the left nostril is incredible. **Twice. Once before you were even born!** ---
**Author:** ![Shai\_tan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Shai\_tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shai_tan)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 8:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/14 "2003-09-22T20:40:09Z")
Okay… that was very disturbing. (and I didn’t even see it coming) I need to log out for a while. My thanks to the mods for getting rid of that guy so quickly… ---
**Author:** ![CaptBushido](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a88e4f/32.png) [@CaptBushido](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CaptBushido)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/15 "2003-09-22T20:47:21Z")
What do you need and who are you grateful to? ---
**Author:** ![Shai\_tan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Shai\_tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shai_tan)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/16 "2003-09-22T20:58:37Z")
Funny. I didn’t get it at first. Thanks for not letting the thread die on that last reply. There are some very disturbing individuals out there. I’m grateful that the mods are so attentive in keeping this board “poster-friendly”. Great job. Now if the hamsters would only pick up from their example. \*\*Two bananas, a quart of yogurt, and a dozen eggs. \*\* ---
**Author:** ![davidm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidm/32/225_2.png) [@davidm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/davidm)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2003, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/17 "2003-09-22T21:24:50Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Shai’tan \* > \*\*Two bananas, a quart of yogurt, and a dozen eggs. \*\* What’s this slimy mess all over my keyboard? ---
**Author:** ![Shai\_tan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/f4b2a3/32.png) [@Shai\_tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shai_tan)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 6:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/18 "2003-09-23T06:14:15Z")
**Ah… yes… I hate to be the one to tell you, but _Coldfire_ did it. Last november.** ---
**Author:** ![Syntropy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/65b543/32.png) [@Syntropy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Syntropy)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 6:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/19 "2003-09-23T06:23:15Z")
Should I pit that heinous wench I was arguing with earlier? ---
**Author:** ![Askance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/askance/32/8281_2.png) [@Askance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Askance)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2003, 6:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/ask-the-psychic/202977/20 "2003-09-23T06:27:34Z")
My wife had a baby in July. I’m sure it’s not mine. How did that happen?