# Asking an African-American woman to give up a bus seat in the handicapped section makes me racist?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [November 17, 2013, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137 "2013-11-17T19:02:24Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/1 "2013-11-17T19:02:24Z")
So I was told Friday night. The bus was crowded, but there were some seats in the back. Being both elderly and handicapped, I asked two teenaged African-American girls to please let me sit down.
They refused, saying “This ain’t the 60’s. I ain’t gotta sit in the back of the bus, you racist.”
I told them I was both older than they were and handicapped. But no. “You just want us to sit in the back, like a racist.”
Sign. Life is hard sometimes.
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### Author:  [@Amateur\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amateur_Barbarian)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/2 "2013-11-17T19:17:40Z")
I would have said, “Well. I see neither Rosa Parks nor Dr. King - if you should happen to know who they are - taught you nothing about respect.”
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### Author:  [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/3 "2013-11-17T19:18:13Z")
I think I’d have gotten the bus driver involved, if these ignorant young jerks were sitting in the “seating for elderly/handicapped people” section.
Maybe your response should have been, “Well, you’re about 40 years younger than I am - how about you just stand then? Or didn’t your parents teach you to respect your elders?”
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### Author:  [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/4 "2013-11-17T19:21:02Z")
Not that I’m saying you did anything wrong, but how was it that you picked those particular individuals out of the rest of the “crowded bus” to ask?
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### Author:  [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/5 "2013-11-17T19:26:51Z")
I always ask the youngest looking adults. And when the elderly white male driver asked them to move, they ignored him.
Finally, a white middle aged woman got up and gave me her seat. As I sat down, I said “Maybe they’re pregnant.”
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### Author:  [@bobot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bobot)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/6 "2013-11-17T19:35:54Z")
There were some seats in the back? Do I have that right? I’m confused, or missing something… Why didn’t you simply sit in the available seats??? I must be missing something, please clarify.\
Handicapped. Ah. Now I see it.
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### Author:  [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/7 "2013-11-17T19:38:44Z")
Because I am elderly and handicapped. Walking on a moving bus is very hard for me, cause of a wrist injury which makes it very hard to hold the bars and keep my balance. I am terrified of falling.
Sue me.
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### Author:  [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/8 "2013-11-17T19:56:33Z")
Next time wear blackface.
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### Author:  [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/9 "2013-11-17T20:24:58Z")
They’re just young, arrogant and stupid.
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### Author:  [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/10 "2013-11-17T20:52:34Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#):
>
> I always ask the youngest looking adults.
While i understand the reasoning behind this strategy, i think you might be better off making a more general announcement to people in the reserved seats, saying that you’re disabled and asking if anyone would be willing to give up their seat for you.
If i were black, and you asked me, specifically, to move when there were also a bunch of white people in the same part of the bus, i might take offense. That doesn’t excuse the way these kids acted, but the fact is that, apart from the issue of being elderly and/or disabled, there is (as far as i know; correct me if i’m wrong) no rule that the youngest person has to give up their seat.
When i was a school student, growing up in Sydney, Australia, we were provided with tickets that allowed us to ride the buses and trains at heavily subsidized rates. In fact, it was so cheap as to be almost free. One of the conditions of this discount was that school students traveling on their subsidized tickets were required to give up their seat to any adult who needed one. Not just the disabled or elderly, but any fare-paying adult. I thought this was a good system: kids ride cheap, but have to stand when the bus or train is busy.
> [@VinylTurnip](#):
>
> Next time wear blackface.
I laughed.
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### Author:  [@Amateur\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amateur_Barbarian)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/11 "2013-11-17T21:36:25Z")
> [@mhendo](#):
>
> That doesn’t excuse the way these kids acted, but the fact is that, apart from the issue of being elderly and/or disabled, there is (as far as i know; correct me if i’m wrong) no rule that the youngest person has to give up their seat.
Most public transit I’ve been on in recent years (mostly light rail/subway) has seats near the doors specifically reserved for handicapped, with notices that it must be given up on request to anyone with movement difficulties.
Along with my above suggestion, I would have told the girls, “Be sure to tell your parents all about this when you get home.”
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### Author:  [@mhendo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mhendo)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/12 "2013-11-17T21:41:52Z")
> [@Amateur\_Barbarian](#):
>
> Most public transit I’ve been on in recent years (mostly light rail/subway) has seats near the doors specifically reserved for handicapped, with notices that it must be given up on request to anyone with movement difficulties.
I’m well aware of that, and it doesn’t contradict anything i wrote
The signs do indeed reserve the seats for people with disabilities, and the signs do say that seats must be given up on request. I was simply noting that the signs say nothing about requiring that the first person to give up his or her seat must be the youngest person sitting. For this reason, i simply suggested that the OP might be better served by making a more general request for a seat, rather than singling out the youngest people sitting, especially if the youngest people happen to be a pair of black kids among a group of white faces.
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### Author:  [@monstro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/monstro)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/13 "2013-11-17T21:46:56Z")
The girls were very rude and stupid, but I agree with **mhendo**. I am usually very quick to offer up my seat to someone who needs it. But I wouldn’t want someone to make assumptions about me based on how youthful I look. Disability has no age limit, and a younger person can be just as tired as an adult.
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### Author:  [@Bill\_Door](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bill_Door)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/14 "2013-11-17T22:33:34Z")
> [@Amateur\_Barbarian](#):
>
> Most public transit I’ve been on in recent years (mostly light rail/subway) has seats near the doors specifically reserved for handicapped, with notices that it must be given up on request to anyone with movement difficulties.
>
> Along with my above suggestion, I would have told the girls, “Be sure to tell your parents all about this when you get home.”
Sadly, I would have said, “Be sure to tell your parents all about this if you ever meet them.”
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### Author:  [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/15 "2013-11-17T22:43:46Z")
> [@Amateur\_Barbarian](#):
>
> I would have said, “Well. I see neither Rosa Parks nor Dr. King - if you should happen to know who they are - taught you nothing about respect.”
I’d have asked them if they would have given up their seats to a handicapped black person.
If they said yes, I’d tell them they were the racists.
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### Author:  [@TBG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TBG)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/16 "2013-11-17T22:48:36Z")
Sounds like they were mentally handicapped, and thus felt entitled to sit there.
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### Author:  [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/17 "2013-11-17T22:49:45Z")
> [@mhendo](#):
>
> \ For this reason, i simply suggested that the OP might be better served by making a more general request for a seat, rather than singling out the youngest people sitting\
That’s actually a good idea - a healthy middle-aged person like I am would be terribly ashamed to be sitting while an older/disabled person was standing. These young punk asses don’t have any shame yet, apparently (and may never get any if they continue to go through life with the idea that anything that doesn’t go in their favour is due to racism).
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### Author:  [@Simplicio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Simplicio)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/18 "2013-11-17T22:53:42Z")
> [@Colibri](#):
>
> I’d have asked them if they would have given up their seats to a handicapped black person.
>
> If they said yes, I’d tell them they were the racists.
Eh, its just teenagers messing with people. They don’t really think **Annie** is racist, and trying to somehow trap them with clever rhetorical devices isn’t somehow going to cause their logic-circuits to overload.
They’re basically playing a slightly different version of “I’m not touching you…I’m not touching you…I’m not touching you”. Best to toss off an insult and then get someone more reasonable to give up their seat and ignore them. Which it sounds like is what **Annie** did.
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### Author:  [@planetcory](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/planetcory)
#### Post date: [November 17, 2013, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/19 "2013-11-17T22:57:08Z")
> [@Chimera](#):
>
> They’re just young, arrogant and stupid.
This. Plus the fact that they were singled out.
I’d be suspicious too. But being neither young nor arrogant, I’d avoid the hassle of an argument, give up my seat then stand uncomfortably close. Because I am indeed stupid. And also an able-bodied dude.
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### Author:  [@Bear\_Nenno](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bear_Nenno)
#### Post date: [November 18, 2013, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/asking-an-african-american-woman-to-give-up-a-bus-seat-in-the-handicapped-section-makes-me-racist/674137/20 "2013-11-18T00:13:48Z")
> [@Annie-Xmas](#):
>
> As I sat down, I said “Maybe they’re pregnant.”
That’s racist.
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