# Aslan v. Sauron **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 11, 2004, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129 "2004-11-11T02:24:38Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Kel\_Varnsen\_Latex\_Division](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/aeb1de/32.png) [@Kel\_Varnsen\_Latex\_Division](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kel_Varnsen_Latex_Division)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/1 "2004-11-11T02:24:38Z")
Who wins in a fight? My money is on: Aslan ---
**Author:** ![teleute12](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@teleute12](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/teleute12)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/2 "2004-11-11T02:26:59Z")
I’m gonna say the Lion. He’s got more intellegent minions. ---
**Author:** ![Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/qadgop_the_mercotan/32/83_2.png) [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/3 "2004-11-11T02:27:38Z")
C’mon, Sauron’s a weenie! Beaten by a _giiiirrrrrrrrrrlllllllllllll!_ (Luthien) Also by an elf and two guys. (Erenion Gil-Galad, Elendil, and Isildur) Of course, Aslan’s a pussy, so who really knows? ---
**Author:** ![Lilacs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Lilacs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lilacs)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/4 "2004-11-11T02:27:58Z")
Well, I would have to go with Aslan. I mean Sauron is evil, of course, and powerful, but the Lion would win. Now, if we’re talking Morgoth vs Aslan…then that’s a more even match. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![toadspittle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c0e974/32.png) [@toadspittle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/toadspittle)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/5 "2004-11-11T02:38:15Z")
Sauron when? Sauron at the time of the War of the Ring? Sauron, hands-down. He’s got thousands of troops! Big smack-down for Aslan. One-on-one (or Sauron at any time he didn’t have an army)? Aslan, easy. Sauron’s a coward, basically. ---
**Author:** ![Malodorous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e47774/32.png) [@Malodorous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malodorous)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/6 "2004-11-11T02:40:51Z")
Does Sauron have the ring? The books certainly made that out to be an important point. ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/7 "2004-11-11T03:06:03Z")
Aslan is God. Aslan wins. ---
**Author:** ![Kythereia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e8c25b/32.png) [@Kythereia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kythereia)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/8 "2004-11-11T03:13:48Z")
Sauron is Evil Incarnate, the representative of Morgoth, the “Devil” of Tolkien’s books. Aslan, as noted above, is God, and all that is good and noble. The good guy _always_ wins. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![qubed](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/f07891/32.png) [@qubed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/qubed)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/9 "2004-11-11T03:27:49Z")
Well, incidently, Sauron is a god of sorts, or maybe more of a spirit. He’s a Maiar (which, incidently is the same race that Gandalf is). They’re sort of third in line - 1. Illuvatar (1 entity) 2. Valar (14 entities) 3. Maiar (Many entities) Although, technically the Valar and Maiar are the same race - Ainur ---
**Author:** ![Jonathan\_Chance](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jonathan_chance/32/701_2.png) [@Jonathan\_Chance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jonathan_Chance)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/10 "2004-11-11T04:32:55Z")
Yeah… Sauron = 3rd tier Aslan = farking GOD, man. Oscure reference: “Psst, laugh, dude! That’s **God**.” ---
**Author:** ![Terrifel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c68b51/32.png) [@Terrifel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terrifel)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/11 "2004-11-11T04:36:08Z")
I was under the impression that Aslan was the son of the Emperor-Over-Sea, rather than the Emperor himself. Although he is described as enormously powerful, Aslan is still evidently mortal and can be killed. At least that’s the way I seem to recall how the books made it out to be. Sauron wins if he’s prepared. ---
**Author:** ![Electronic\_Chaos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Electronic\_Chaos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Electronic_Chaos)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/12 "2004-11-11T04:48:28Z")
Why don’t we just [ask](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/member.php) [them](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/member.php?userid=31157) ---
**Author:** ![Baker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bb73d2/32.png) [@Baker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Baker)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/13 "2004-11-11T04:50:21Z")
Ah, yes, but Aslan came back from the dead! Who does _that_ put you in mind of, hmmmm? 😃 Aslan would win. ---
**Author:** ![HPL](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/3da27b/32.png) [@HPL](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HPL)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/14 "2004-11-11T04:51:50Z")
> [@Jonathan Chance](#): > > Yeah… > Sauron = 3rd tier > > Aslan = farking GOD, man. Actually, I think Aslan is Jesus, but it probably doesn’t make much difference. After all, Jesus and Moses used AK-47’s to defeat the Roman Empire. ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/15 "2004-11-11T04:53:56Z")
> [@Terrifel](#): > > I was under the impression that Aslan was the son of the Emperor-Over-Sea, rather than the Emperor himself. Although he is described as enormously powerful, Aslan is still evidently mortal and can be killed. At least that’s the way I seem to recall how the books made it out to be. > > Sauron wins if he’s prepared. Aslan creates Narnia (and by implication, our Universe also) in THE MAGICIAN’S NEPHEW. And after getting killed in LION, WITCH & WARDROBE, Aslan gets resurrected. You know Aslan is Narnian Jesus, don’t ya? ---
**Author:** ![Malodorous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e47774/32.png) [@Malodorous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malodorous)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/16 "2004-11-11T05:16:38Z")
> [@FriarTed](#): > > You know Aslan is Narnian Jesus, don’t ya? Then I vote Sauron. History has shown that Jesus if in fact quite easy to kill. ---
**Author:** ![Terrifel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c68b51/32.png) [@Terrifel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Terrifel)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/17 "2004-11-11T05:22:12Z")
> [@FriarTed](#): > > Aslan creates Narnia (and by implication, our Universe also) in THE MAGICIAN’S NEPHEW. And after getting killed in LION, WITCH & WARDROBE, Aslan gets resurrected. > > You know Aslan is Narnian Jesus, don’t ya? I’d heard something to that effect, yes. I’d bet that Sauron would win against Jesus, too, actually. I don’t recall whether the Scriptures have much to say about the Son of Man’s brawling ability, but if they mentioned it at all in Sunday School it was a very passing reference. Granted, the guy was a carpenter, which probably indicates a fair amount of upper body strength, but Sauron had burning hot skin and a huge war hammer. Plus he probably wore a full helm, so defeating him a la Goliath isn’t going to be as viable an option on the battlefield. Just because you can create a universe doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re any good at defending it. On the contrary, if your universe is so carelessly designed that you have to intervene personally to keep it from destroying itself, then I think this might be seen as reflecting poorly on your abilities–and if you manage to let yourself get killed while doing so, what does that say about your long-range planning skills? I hardly think that having the ability to resurrect yourself after your enemy destroys you is equivalent to a guarantee of victory. ---
**Author:** ![MrDibble](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mrdibble/32/114_2.png) [@MrDibble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrDibble)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/18 "2004-11-11T06:40:21Z")
> [@Terrifel](#): > > I don’t recall whether the Scriptures have much to say about the Son of Man’s brawling ability, but if they mentioned it at all in Sunday School it was a very passing reference. Well, he certainly laid the smackdown on the money-changers in the temple, with A WHIP no less. A Whip? OMG, JESUS = BALROG! ---
**Author:** ![moriah](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b2d939/32.png) [@moriah](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/moriah)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 7:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/19 "2004-11-11T07:16:27Z")
They both keep coming back from the dead. Now, we know from South Park, that Satan can take Jesus in a boxing match. So, in a Sauron-Aslan bout, we can probably see a lot of Aslan deaths with an occasional Sauron death. Is this being judged on points? ---
**Author:** ![toadspittle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c0e974/32.png) [@toadspittle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/toadspittle)\ **Post date:** [November 11, 2004, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129/20 "2004-11-11T13:06:40Z")
> [@Baker](#): > > Ah, yes, but Aslan came back from the dead! So did Sauron. Twice, actually, so he’s got one up on Aslan. But Aslan’s much prettier, at least by the time of the War of the Ring. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aslan-v-sauron/274129.md?page=2)