# Assbandit's Creed - how do you say "dogshit" in Arabic? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 15, 2008, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/assbandits-creed-how-do-you-say-dogshit-in-arabic/463671 "2008-09-15T05:58:50Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2009, 7:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/assbandits-creed-how-do-you-say-dogshit-in-arabic/463671/61 "2009-05-08T19:53:11Z")
**Max Torque** ’s video just illustrates how dumb easy this game is. That’s one of its major downfalls. ---
**Author:** ![Agent\_Foxtrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9fc29f/32.png) [@Agent\_Foxtrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Agent_Foxtrot)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2009, 8:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/assbandits-creed-how-do-you-say-dogshit-in-arabic/463671/62 "2009-05-08T20:48:28Z")
> [@Max\_Torque](#): > > I liked it overall, although it was certainly repetitive. The best bits, of course, were the assassination missions, which of course are just a small part of the overall gameplay. On the plus side, you can pull off some really great moves sometimes, which can give you a quick hit of gaming euphoria. Mine came on the second to last mission, Sibrand, who is a real bugger because he’s paranoid and sees assassins everywhere. I had to get aboard his boat, so I took the long way around, jumping from pole to pole, and finally reached the boat, hanging from the side as I waited for an opening. As luck would have it, Sibrand soon walked right past me yelling at his crew, and he began to climb up the stairs to the rear deck. That was my moment; I heaved myself onto the railing and leaped for him with my hidden blade. I heard a guard yell “ASSASSIN!” while I was in the air, and Sibrand turned around, just in time for me to hit him halfway up the stairs, land full on his chest, and ride him to the ground with the hidden blade in his neck. That was freakin’ beautiful. Thanks for mentioning this. Sibrand was my absolute favorite target, for two reasons: One, my experience was much like yours, though it took me about 15 times to get to the boat and hit him unnoticed. I simply refused to take him out with anything other than a low-profile stealth hit. When I did, though, my God was it sweet. The second reason? I loved that hit because Sibrand was such an unmitigated bastard. 😃 > [@Max\_Torque](#): > > Anyway, I’m a completist, so I finished the whole darn thing, 1000/1000. Those last few flags were a bitch. Got 1000/1000 on **Banjo-Kazooie: Nuts & Bolts** , too, if you need blueprints in the future. Not that mine are great or anything, but some are okay; got a couple of great racers, at least. Still working on the “Lost Challenges” expansion for that one. Completionist here, too. I obtained all 25 Assassin Flags from Masyaf, and that took about an hour and a half. I can’t imagine how much time I’d spend trying to collect 100 King Richard Flags. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Max\_Torque](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Max\_Torque](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Max_Torque)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2009, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/assbandits-creed-how-do-you-say-dogshit-in-arabic/463671/63 "2009-05-08T21:43:40Z")
> [@Agent\_Foxtrot](#): > > Completionist here, too. I obtained all 25 Assassin Flags from Masyaf, and that took about an hour and a half. I can’t imagine how much time I’d spend trying to collect 100 King Richard Flags. ☹ I don’t know if you consider stuff like this “cheating”, but in my opinion it’s sometimes very necessary: there’s a website called [Assassin’s Creed Maps](http://www.assassinscreed-maps.com/Maps.htm) that has excellent maps for finding all the flags. Each map includes a checklist, so you can click to mark the flags off as you collect them (saved in a browser cookie). The most useful bit is, you can mouseover each flag on the map and get a picture showing exactly how the flag appears in the game. The Templars are on the maps, too. Since I don’t have a computer near my Xbox, I used some printable maps I found [elsewhere](http://www.gamesradar.com/ps3/f/assassins-creed-templar-and-flag-guide/a-20071220151814545010/g-20060502162716256014), but some of their information about where the flags and Templars are is just flat-out WRONG, which was extremely frustrating; when I was down to my last few, I had to double-check things against the first site. At least I had the foresight to double-slash through flags as I found them, and single-slash through flags that weren’t where the guide said they were (meaning either it was wrong or I’d already gotten it), which cut down the cross-referencing considerably. Still, it took a couple hours a night for close to a week to collect everything. ---
**Author:** ![RandMcnally](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b782af/32.png) [@RandMcnally](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RandMcnally)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2009, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/assbandits-creed-how-do-you-say-dogshit-in-arabic/463671/64 "2009-05-09T01:01:04Z")
I enjoyed he game well enough, but never finished it because I wanted to trade it in for credit for Call of Duty: Modern Warfare. What I liked best about Assassin’s Creed was that it was something different. What I didn’t like was all the fighting you had to do. I wanted to assassinate people, not go in there with sword blazing. And I hated all of the cut scenes, right before and after. Those were not needed. ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2009, 4:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/assbandits-creed-how-do-you-say-dogshit-in-arabic/463671/65 "2009-05-09T04:02:46Z")
Dogshit. Mount and Blade - this is where it’s at. Seriously, it’s addictive. Download it (it costs like 5 dollars for the full version) then get the 1217 AD mod. You also really need the Armed Rebalance mod but the problem is you can’t have that and the 1217 AD mod running at the same time. SO… I went to the trouble of going through the resource files and merging the two mods together by editing the item file in Notepad (which was a real pain in the ass) so YOU don’t have to! If you want a custom Mod for Mount and Blade that combines the vastly improved textures and aesthetics, not to mention gameplay mechanics, of the 1217 AD mod, with the ridiculous variety of different armors and horses offered by the Armed Rebalance mod, PM me and I will find some way of sending you the file (though it may have to be broken down into several archives.) ---
**Author:** ![Jragon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e19b73/32.png) [@Jragon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jragon)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2009, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/assbandits-creed-how-do-you-say-dogshit-in-arabic/463671/66 "2009-05-09T05:47:03Z")
> [@sturmhauke](#): > > Isn’t Alt-F4 a command handled at the Windows level though, rather than the application level? Meaning, it tells Windows to terminate the application immediately without saving any data or anything like that. It’s at least possible to override it to some degree, I’ve played one or two games where Alt+F4 prompts a save dialogue prior to exit (and I’m almost certain I’ve played at least one game where it did something completely different). > [@Argent\_Towers](#): > > I liked the original Banjo Kazooie for N64, and I also loved the first Ratchet and Clank game. Is it kind of like that? It’s not like the original in playstyle, but is in spirit. (Also, you were the last person I expected to be a Banjo-Kazooie fan, what with quotes like: > [@The Nintendo Wii is the Celine Dion of this generation of consoles.](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/the-nintendo-wii-is-the-celine-dion-of-this-generation-of-consoles/447296/103): > > No, I’m not having a laugh. There’s nothing funny about it. I don’t like fantasy, I hate Zelda, I hate cartoony Mario type shit ) The thing I thought was cool though is that’s it’s not a “racing game” it’s, as best as I can describe it, a vehicle based platformer/puzzle game. 'Sides, I made a MOTORCYCLE PLANE THAT DROPS BOMBS, that made the whole thing worth it. Luckily the engineering is simple, two engines go twice as fast, you don’t need to make sure your fuel is connected right to your engine, and you don’t need to make sure your cockpit has a line of sight to the terrain (since it’s third person), everything is just about making the right vehicle and having fun seeing how crazy you can make stuff. Also… and I’m not usually one to point this stuff out, but I was that surprised: [new and improved Humba Wumba](http://xbox360media.ign.com/xbox360/image/article/872/872681/banjo-kazooie-nuts-and-bolts-screens-and-art-20080508022751563_640w.jpg). ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2009, 6:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/assbandits-creed-how-do-you-say-dogshit-in-arabic/463671/67 "2009-05-09T06:40:24Z")
Yeah, I don’t know what I was thinking when I wrote that about the “cartoony Mario-type shit.” I was probably really drunk, stoned, or under the influence of some other substance, because that’s just hyperbole. I played the shit out of Super Mario 64 and I still do, whenever I get the chance. I was probably really hung up on the notion of “gritty,” realistic action adventure games (which I do enjoy) when I wrote that (and keep in mind it was a pretty long time ago, relatively speaking.) Generally when I play action/adventure games, I do like them to be realistic and strive to emulate the characteristics of real life, but I like them to also retain a degree of artistic style. It doesn’t need to look EXACTLY like real life, but the overall atmosphere should be one that’s believable and not fantastical. But I have a place in my heart for fun games like all of the old N64 ones. I especially love Blast Corps and Wave Race. (The Wave Race theme song is badass!) ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Some\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ad7895/32.png) [@Just\_Some\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Some_Guy)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2009, 8:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/assbandits-creed-how-do-you-say-dogshit-in-arabic/463671/68 "2009-05-09T08:37:30Z")
As long as people are complaining about this bimbo of a game (my review: “It’s really neat… and if only they had put a game in there it would be fun”), there’s one thing I just love in it. And by love I mean “Mock mercilessly because it’s so terrible.” It’s the way the designers seem to dote on story. Not only are all the cut scenes completely unskipable, long, filled with terrible dialog, but they they flicker garbage in them to try and get the player to dance around the scene like Michael Bay. They obviously thought the story was so brilliant that you as the player should be weeping tears of joy to encounter it. It’s the worst overwritten game story since the Metal Gear series. It’s a trite, predictable, shallow story that they tried to dress up with incredibly weak philosophy and failed badly at it. ---
**Author:** ![Agent\_Foxtrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9fc29f/32.png) [@Agent\_Foxtrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Agent_Foxtrot)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2009, 3:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/assbandits-creed-how-do-you-say-dogshit-in-arabic/463671/69 "2009-05-09T15:01:17Z")
**Argent Towers** , I understand you didn’t like the game, but isn’t your vitriol poured on a little thick? Jesus. ---
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2009, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/assbandits-creed-how-do-you-say-dogshit-in-arabic/463671/70 "2009-05-09T18:15:13Z")
> [@Agent\_Foxtrot](#): > > **Argent Towers** , I understand you didn’t like the game, but isn’t your vitriol poured on a little thick? Jesus. Heh, it’s a crappy and poorly executed game that doesn’t live up to the potential promised by it’s awesome premise and cool gameplay style. _shrugs_ It really missed the bar it sets for itself by a wide margin. And the whole Desmond plot really is hokey as fuck. One can follow a theme of Templars vs Assassins throughout the ages without the silly DNA memory crap. ---
**Author:** ![Argent\_Towers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e8c25b/32.png) [@Argent\_Towers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Argent_Towers)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2009, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/assbandits-creed-how-do-you-say-dogshit-in-arabic/463671/71 "2009-05-10T02:37:52Z")
I have to lulz at that question. “Vitriol poured on too thick” - obviously he’s either never read, or doesn’t remember, some of my past rants when it comes to movies or video games. I believe “yak cock” was one keyword that popped up a lot. ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2009, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/assbandits-creed-how-do-you-say-dogshit-in-arabic/463671/72 "2009-05-10T05:52:21Z")
> [@Miller](#): > > I thought it was a good review. Although it confused the hell out of me at first, because I got you confused with the OP. Same here. Also, from the description of the game, although I haven’t played it, and probably never will (not really my kind of game), I’m more inclined to agree with you and Foxtrot. The game the OP apparently thought he was getting sounds positively boring…at least the stuff he’s whinging about adds some level of interest. ---
**Author:** ![mswas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e99b99/32.png) [@mswas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mswas)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2009, 9:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/assbandits-creed-how-do-you-say-dogshit-in-arabic/463671/73 "2009-05-10T09:50:30Z")
> [@Tengu](#): > > The game the OP apparently thought he was getting sounds positively boring…at least the stuff he’s whinging about adds some level of interest. You like obsessively compulsively collecting flags huh? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/assbandits-creed-how-do-you-say-dogshit-in-arabic/463671.md?page=3)