# Astronaut kidnapping scheme **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 6, 2007, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043 "2007-02-06T04:12:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![UKCatGirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/a88e57/32.png) [@UKCatGirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UKCatGirl)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/1 "2007-02-06T04:12:10Z")
Here’s a [link](http://www.wesh.com/news/10937732/detail.html). Just saw this story on the news. Basically this astronaut found out the guy she was in love with, also an astronaut, was dating someone else and she decided to kidnap the other woman. She drove all the way from Houston to Orlando to make it to the airport by the time the woman’s flight was getting in. The attempted kidnapper pepper sprayed the woman and wore a wig and a trench coat as a disguise. On the news they said she also wore a diaper while on her roadtrip to save time :eek:, but that’s not in the article for some reason. Bizarre. _She’s_ certainly not someone I’d like to be stuck in a space shuttle with. ---
**Author:** ![Santos\_L\_Halper](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/santos_l_halper/32/1_2.png) [@Santos\_L\_Halper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Santos_L_Halper)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/2 "2007-02-06T04:26:15Z")
I was just coming here to post that. I’d have to say when I heard it on the news that I definitely had my WTF moment for the month. The bit about the diaper is mentioned in [this report](http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,250415,00.html), and here’s her [NASA bio](http://www.jsc.nasa.gov/Bios/htmlbios/nowak.html). The whole thing is very bizarre. You don’t suppose she could be suffering from… SPACE MADNESS?! ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 4:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/3 "2007-02-06T04:30:34Z")
[Dr. Nowakurter]Or else my mind may well snap![/Dr. Nowakurter] ---
**Author:** ![Dag\_Otto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/439d5e/32.png) [@Dag\_Otto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dag_Otto)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 4:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/4 "2007-02-06T04:42:03Z")
First, hats off to Lisa for that first rate Nick Nolte style mugshot. That will be a classic one day. Thanks, Lisa! Second, read this bit by Fox News: > [@](#): > > When she found out that Shipman was flying to Orlando from Houston, Nowak decided to confront her, according to the arrest affidavit. Nowak drove the 900-mile trip from Houston to Orlando wearing diapers, police said. WTF? Shipman was flying from Houston to Orlando. Nowak drove from Houston to Orlando and made it in time to confront Shipman? That takes more than diapers, man. That takes one hell of a fast car. ---
**Author:** ![E-Sabbath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e19adc/32.png) [@E-Sabbath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-Sabbath)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/5 "2007-02-06T04:43:22Z")
Remember, all astronauts wear diapers in spacesuits. Or, at least, the last time I checked they did. It’s about as unusual for one to wear one for a long drive as it would be for me to have a spare operating system somewhere around my person. ---
**Author:** ![Ogre](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/ecb155/32.png) [@Ogre](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ogre)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/6 "2007-02-06T04:50:33Z")
[QUOTE=E-Sabbath] Remember, all astronauts wear diapers in spacesuits. Or, at least, the last time I checked they did. It’s about as unusual for one to wear one for a long drive as it would be for me to have a spare operating system somewhere around my person. [/QUOTE] Yeah, but instead of jumping on a plane and using the restroom conveniently provided on the aircraft, _and_ saving many, many hours in the process, she went to the store, got some diapers, then jumped into the car for a cross-country drive…_so she could save time_. She has, unfortunately, cracked. ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 4:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/7 "2007-02-06T04:56:25Z")
The CNN link with bedraggled mugshot: [Astronaut arrested on attempted kidnapping charges - CNN.com](http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/02/05/space.love/index.html) This story is just a cornucopia of weirdness: astronauts, classic mugshot, diapers, and the fact that the CNN URL titles the article “space.love” ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/8 "2007-02-06T05:09:30Z")
Whoa. That space tourist who was going to go up dressed as a Gundam character doesn’t look that crazy now, does he? Maybe it’s time to start that “Weird Astronaut Tricks” thread—so far I can think of Captain Adult-Undergarments here, the mission specialist who’s buried somewhere on Everest, and that Air Force X-15 pilot who went on to fly combat missions in 'Nam. ---
**Author:** ![Zabali\_Clawbane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/ecd19e/32.png) [@Zabali\_Clawbane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zabali_Clawbane)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/9 "2007-02-06T05:58:42Z")
[Here](http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/16997958/?GT1=9033)’s MSNBC’s coverage of this, they have video. MSNBC says Oefelein isn’t married. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 9:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/10 "2007-02-06T09:23:34Z")
The first one I saw was the report linked in the second post. To think that someone so wrong in the head (assuming the reports are correct etc etc) has made it all the way to Navy Captain is kind’a scary. For some reason I always hope that managers whose jobs include Things That Go Boom won’t be as dumb as the rest of humanity… (Sorry, haven’t slept enough and that always makes me cranky) ---
**Author:** ![Kalhoun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3bc359/32.png) [@Kalhoun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalhoun)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 12:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/11 "2007-02-06T12:11:47Z")
The last stronghold of the American Hero is now firmly wedged in the shitter. ---
**Author:** ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/12 "2007-02-06T14:21:53Z")
Her behavior is perfectly consistent with astronaut and Navy pilot training. They’re always ordered to go for it, to get out there and GET THE JOB DONE NO MATTER WHAT! This is what the woman was doing. Her behavior is perfectly consistent with being an astronaut, in fact, I’m surprised this sort of thing doesn’t happen more often with astronauts. ---
**Author:** ![Trunk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/87869e/32.png) [@Trunk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trunk)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/13 "2007-02-06T14:28:32Z")
The further you let their leash extend from the kitchen, the crazier they get. Women in space. What will they think of next. . .a monkey in space? ---
**Author:** ![slortar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/6bbea6/32.png) [@slortar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/slortar)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/14 "2007-02-06T14:31:15Z")
Heh. Why don’t they post **this** on Spaceref? Are they going to play the trial on the NASA channel? 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![lieu](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/c2a13f/32.png) [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/15 "2007-02-06T14:31:31Z")
_Houston, we have a Nasahole._ ---
**Author:** ![Pushkin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/ee59a6/32.png) [@Pushkin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pushkin)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/16 "2007-02-06T14:51:28Z")
The [BBC](http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/americas/6333975.stm) confirm the wearing of a nappy/diaper and add that she was also armed with a steel mallet in addition to the airgun and knife. ---
**Author:** ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 3:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/17 "2007-02-06T15:58:21Z")
**And** the four feet of rubber tubing. **And** the latex gloves. **And** the Hefty sacks. Frankly I’m not surprised they initially held her without bail. The whole ensemble of tools creeps me out in a not-fun way. Maybe I just watch too much TV. And copies of love-letter e-mails from Shipman to the gent in question. How you suppose she got hold of those? And what do you suppose her kids are thinking right now? “My mom had the hots for this astronaut, so she went to see the Other Woman armed with rubber gloves, a knife, and Hefty sacks.” ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/18 "2007-02-06T15:59:27Z")
> [@](#): > > Yeah, but instead of jumping on a plane and using the restroom conveniently provided on the aircraft, and saving many, many hours in the process, she went to the store, got some diapers, then jumped into the car for a cross-country drive…so she could save time. The more disturbing possibility is that she’s been carrying diapers, pepper spray, rubber tubing, wig, trench coat, mallet, and knife in her car all along in anticipation of this type of situation arising. ---
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/19 "2007-02-06T16:03:24Z")
[QUOTE=Muffin] [Dr. Nowakurter]Or else my mind may well snap![/Dr. Nowakurter] [/QUOTE] crackel pop ---
**Author:** ![mks57](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b9bd4f/32.png) [@mks57](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mks57)\ **Post date:** [February 6, 2007, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043/20 "2007-02-06T16:03:26Z")
It’s a bad day to be a PAO (public affairs officer) at NASA. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/astronaut-kidnapping-scheme/391043.md?page=2)