# At what age did you lose your virginity? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 30, 2009, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058 "2009-09-30T01:26:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2009, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/1 "2009-09-30T01:26:26Z")
Wanted to try the new polling feature, so that’s mainly what this is for. Knock yourselves out… ---
**Author:** ![norinew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/eb9ed0/32.png) [@norinew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/norinew)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2009, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/2 "2009-09-30T01:34:35Z")
I was repeatedly sexually molested as a child (from approx. 8YO until approx. 15YO). My mother knew about the abuse, but would not put a stop to it. (Her solution? “Stay away from him”. When, in fact, the abuser lived with us, and when I needed a ride anywhere, he would volunteer to drive me, and she would say “OK, then!”) By age 14, I was looking wherever I could for affection and validation. Turned out to be sex. Or at least I _thought_ that was affection and validation. After the deaths of everyone involved in that abuse, and years of therapy, I’m better now. Thanks very much. None of my business if single young women (insert your own definition of “young”, but _not children_) decide to be sexually active. But I have always advocated ‘waiting for a special person’ for my daughters. IMO, I slept with _too many_ guys. And for all the wrong reasons. ---
**Author:** ![chaoticbear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f07891/32.png) [@chaoticbear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chaoticbear)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2009, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/3 "2009-09-30T04:04:15Z")
Hmm, I am the ONLY one who answered 12 or younger? I had a neighbor when I was very young, he was maybe 3 years older, and we engaged in penetrative sex of various sorts. Not again after that until I was 18 and fully legal though. Looking back, I wasn’t really fully aware of what it was, but I assume I have to call it sex for virginity purposes. ---
**Author:** ![Asimovian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asimovian/32/172_2.png) [@Asimovian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asimovian)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2009, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/4 "2009-09-30T04:20:24Z")
I can never quite remember if it was _on_ my 18th birthday, or exactly a week before my 18th birthday. So I may have inadvertently lied on my poll answer. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2009, 5:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/5 "2009-09-30T05:41:18Z")
I got my first BJ when I was 15. Didn’t have vagina sex till I was 16. Wasn’t sure how to answer. I picked “14-15” on the poll. This poll should have included gender BTW. Male here. ---
**Author:** ![Sunspace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sunspace/32/1250_2.png) [@Sunspace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunspace)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2009, 6:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/6 "2009-09-30T06:09:16Z")
Age 29 at art school. Wiccan women are open-minded and flexible. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![AboutAsWeirdAsYouCanGet](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/22d042/32.png) [@AboutAsWeirdAsYouCanGet](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AboutAsWeirdAsYouCanGet)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2009, 6:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/7 "2009-09-30T06:18:18Z")
> [@](#): > > But I have always advocated ‘waiting for a special person’ for my daughters. IMO, I slept with too many guys. And for all the wrong reasons. OT but norinew that is good. Nothing wrong with sleeping with a lot of guys or girls…but it does seem like a lot of the people (NOT ALL before I get attacked) who do indulge in that sort of stuff, have a lot of emotional issues that they need to work out. Just seems that a lot of it is people looking for love and affection in the wrong way. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2009, 6:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/8 "2009-09-30T06:25:57Z")
> [@SHAKES](#): > > I got my first BJ when I was 15. > > Didn’t have vagina sex till I was 16. > > Wasn’t sure how to answer. I picked “14-15” on the poll. > > This poll should have included gender BTW. > > Male here. BJs count, especially for those of us who have never had vaginal sex. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![manila](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e5b9ba/32.png) [@manila](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/manila)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2009, 7:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/9 "2009-09-30T07:49:32Z")
> [@chaoticbear](#): > > Hmm, I am the ONLY one who answered 12 or younger? I had a neighbor when I was very young, he was maybe 3 years older, and we engaged in penetrative sex of various sorts. Not again after that until I was 18 and fully legal though. Looking back, I wasn’t really fully aware of what it was, but I assume I have to call it sex for virginity purposes. Nope me too! 11 years old with babysitter ( at my not much older sister’s instigation) Didnt really understand much what was happenning either. ---
**Author:** ![HeyHomie](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/heyhomie/32/207_2.png) [@HeyHomie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HeyHomie)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2009, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/10 "2009-09-30T15:25:26Z")
A few weeks shy of my 18th birthday. And damn was it some good sex! :eek: Girl knew what she was doing! 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Drain\_Bead](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e47774/32.png) [@Drain\_Bead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drain_Bead)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2009, 3:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/11 "2009-09-30T15:30:08Z")
I say 13-15, but it was on Spring Break and my birthday is in early April, so I was almost 16. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [September 30, 2009, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/12 "2009-09-30T15:32:00Z")
I’m not sure there’s a definition of virginity that’s going to apply to all Dopers. Oddly, in a circle of about 20-30 girls I was friends with during high school and for a few years after I can only think of one who had vaginal sex with a boy before the age of 18. And these were mostly crazy hot, horny, well-adjusted girls from good homes in a major city with lax drinking laws. Part of it may have been that not many people dated one-on-one, so I suppose there was less opportunity. ---
**Author:** ![joyfool](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@joyfool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joyfool)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2009, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/13 "2009-10-02T14:52:35Z")
I picked the age that I was when I had actual intercourse (24) versus all the other heavy petting / fooling around stuff that preempted it (18). Hope that didn’t mess with your results. ---
**Author:** ![Beware\_of\_Doug](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/278dde/32.png) [@Beware\_of\_Doug](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beware_of_Doug)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2009, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/14 "2009-10-02T15:57:30Z")
1. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2009, 4:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/15 "2009-10-02T16:38:36Z")
Hard question to answer for me. Petting at 13. BJ at 14. Penetration and cunnilingus at 18. Penetration to orgasm at 21. It was a slow process. ---
**Author:** ![Colophon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f05b48/32.png) [@Colophon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colophon)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2009, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/16 "2009-10-02T16:42:53Z")
19 for me. A smattering of fooling around, BJs etc before that, but that’s not losing your virginity by any stretch of the imagination. I was just glad to get it done while I was still a teenager! ---
**Author:** ![gurujulp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ba9def/32.png) [@gurujulp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gurujulp)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2009, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/17 "2009-10-02T16:44:14Z")
Too bad there isn’t a way to attach the age ranges of those who selected ‘never’. If you are sixteen and selected that, it is a bit different than being sixty and so choosing. ---
**Author:** ![Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/malleus_incus_stapes/32/3293_2.png) [@Malleus\_Incus\_Stapes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malleus_Incus_Stapes)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2009, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/18 "2009-10-02T19:37:43Z")
I’m 20, I picked “never”, and I’d probably still pick “never” twenty years from now. I’m just not interested. ---
**Author:** ![pravnik](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8edcca/32.png) [@pravnik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pravnik)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2009, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/19 "2009-10-02T19:42:32Z")
17, which was oddly enough the same age I got my driver’s license. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [October 2, 2009, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058/20 "2009-10-02T19:43:15Z")
About 17 or 18 IIRC. Just plain ole normal sex with a girl I had been dating. Probably would have been a few years earlier if I was less awkward at the time. I’m sure we all knew that kid who had a full-on beard in middle school who was banging a 35 year old, but pretty much if you had sex before age 14 or so, that’s pretty fucked up, right? [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/at-what-age-did-you-lose-your-virginity/512058.md?page=2)