# Atheist: If you HAD to chose a religion, what would it be? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [January 14, 2011, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556 "2011-01-14T03:07:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 17\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![AppallingGael](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9bd4f/32.png) [@AppallingGael](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AppallingGael)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2011, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556/81 "2011-01-15T05:05:40Z")
Chicism. ---
**Author:** ![missred](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/missred/32/14096_2.png) [@missred](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/missred)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2011, 5:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556/82 "2011-01-15T05:17:58Z")
Probably something centering around earth/nature worship. For something more organized, Reconstructionist or Reform Judism. As it stands, if I’m so inclined to get up early on a weekend morning, I’ll head to the local U.U. congregation. ---
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2011, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556/83 "2011-01-15T05:23:21Z")
Probably [Crom](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crom_%28fictional_deity%29) worship. Low reward, but low investment. ---
**Author:** ![Ruby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/13edae/32.png) [@Ruby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruby)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2011, 5:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556/84 "2011-01-15T05:49:37Z")
I think I would find some new-age, nature-honoring, naked-in-the-moonlight religion. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [January 15, 2011, 10:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556/85 "2011-01-15T22:53:29Z")
I am only prevented from worshipping Athena and Thor by their obstinant non-existence. ---
**Author:** ![Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/left_hand_of_dorkness/32/7156_2.png) [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Left_Hand_of_Dorkness)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2011, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556/86 "2011-01-16T03:05:24Z")
> [@kanicbird](#): > > OK, here is a scenario that may help. God comes to you, takes you for a tour of the heavens, you know that he is the real deal. He tells you that he is doing away with Atheism. He lets you know that you will not remember this event at all, but he is willing to give you your choice of what religion you would like. Given something kinda like this but vaguer (I come to know that in 20 minutes I’ll be incapable of atheism, and that I can choose what beliefs will fill the religious spot in my head, I’d go with Paganism, probably find myself a nice mystical branch of Druidism that doesn’t take itself terribly seriously, and be happy there. ---
**Author:** ![Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/q/f04885/32.png) [@Qin\_Shi\_Huangdi](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qin_Shi_Huangdi)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2011, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556/87 "2011-01-16T04:15:14Z")
> [@control-z](#): > > Probably Buddhism or some sort of quiet reserved Christianity (Methodist?) Ehrm John Wesley was the greatest revivalist of his age. ---
**Author:** ![Rushgeekgirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rushgeekgirl/32/3715_2.png) [@Rushgeekgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rushgeekgirl)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2011, 8:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556/88 "2011-01-16T08:08:09Z")
I started Cynthianity quite a few years back so I’d have no reason to change. ---
**Author:** ![Kobal2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kobal2/32/20_2.png) [@Kobal2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kobal2)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2011, 8:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556/89 "2011-01-16T08:37:52Z")
Sun worship, with a side of prayers to Joe Pesci. ---
**Author:** ![Apollyon](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/apollyon/32/4238_2.png) [@Apollyon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Apollyon)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556/90 "2011-01-17T03:03:52Z")
Tough call. The major monotheists are all out… at least in their mainstream versions. Bearing in mind I have a rather warped impression of Islam from the days of having a Muslim flatmate who liked his red wine and bacon… mmm… I could perhaps get behind the concept expressed in the Gospel of Thomas: “Split a piece of wood, and I am there. Lift a stone, and you will find me there”, if it didn’t come with the rest of the baggage… practically animism. > [@Caricci](#): > > if you’re worshipping nature you can at least see the tree or the sky or the water and you know it’s generally working to your advantage. It makes more sense to sing to the trees in your back yard than going to church… Though it could turn trimming the hedge into a religious crisis. 🙂 > [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > I am only prevented from worshipping Athena and Thor by their obstinant non-existence. Is that classic or Simonson Thor? In either case both Athena and Thor seem decent options… I’ve sometimes felt that had I lived in an earlier age with old-time religion Thor would have been good enough for me. 🙂 The only other real option would be to believe in the Great Old Ones… and cherish the hope that they never return. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556/91 "2011-01-17T04:15:01Z")
> [@pepperlandgirl](#): > > Even a planet and omniscient power isn’t worth it. > > Is there any religion that requires absolutely nothing from me? No, but there is [one](http://www.subgenius.com/) that requires absolutely nothing more from you than $30.00. ---
**Author:** ![BrainGlutton](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/82dd89/32.png) [@BrainGlutton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrainGlutton)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556/92 "2011-01-17T04:17:06Z")
I want something like Buddhism, but with more explosions. ---
**Author:** ![drachillix](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/48db29/32.png) [@drachillix](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drachillix)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 6:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556/93 "2011-01-17T06:51:35Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > I want something like Buddhism, but with more explosions. Jedi? ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Fight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/90ced4/32.png) [@Cat\_Fight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Fight)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 6:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556/94 "2011-01-17T06:56:46Z")
Probably some sort of paganism so vague it just involves a lot of good food and campfires. ---
**Author:** ![Trepa\_Mayfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/edb3f5/32.png) [@Trepa\_Mayfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trepa_Mayfield)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 7:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556/95 "2011-01-17T07:08:09Z")
I already have a sort of unconscious proto-religion, despite being an atheist. I supposed, if pressed, I would develop it into a full-fledged religion. ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 8:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556/96 "2011-01-17T08:38:25Z")
> [@BrainGlutton](#): > > I want something like Buddhism, but with more explosions. Would you settle for self-immolation? It’s flamey! ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2011, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556/97 "2011-01-17T14:45:46Z")
The Bahai seem like the least obnoxious believers. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheist-if-you-had-to-chose-a-religion-what-would-it-be/567556.md?page=4)