# Atheists and Biblical Familiarity **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [February 8, 2019, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179 "2019-02-08T15:20:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2019, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/81 "2019-02-09T16:59:56Z")
I’m actually looking for a non-smarmy\* audiobook of old and/or new testaments, but I want a more accurate translation than King James, and not one that interpolates its interpretations without noting this. Recommendations from among [these](https://www.cambridge.org/be/bibles/bible-versions), or others? \*fakey pompous religious radio voice ---
**Author:** ![Voyager](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/voyager/32/133_2.png) [@Voyager](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Voyager)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2019, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/82 "2019-02-09T18:38:04Z")
> [@Tatterdemalion](#): > > I read somewhere the the bible should be republished as an old fashioned Ace double. One side would be, “War god of Isreal,” and the flip side would be, “The thing with three souls” I love it! Don Wollheim is smiling down on you. Voyager, who has 2 shelf fulls of Ace Doubles. (Now, who does the covers?) ---
**Author:** ![garygnu](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/garygnu/32/2924_2.png) [@garygnu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/garygnu)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2019, 10:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/83 "2019-02-09T22:16:25Z")
There’s an ocean of options between “skimmed” and “read” an 800,000-word compilation. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2019, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/84 "2019-02-09T23:00:03Z")
> [@Novelty\_Bobble](#): > > Is that to me? If so, I don’t get the reference. Post 65. ---
**Author:** ![Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slow_moving_vehicle/32/291_2.png) [@Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slow_Moving_Vehicle)\ **Post date:** [February 9, 2019, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/85 "2019-02-09T23:56:55Z")
I voted “other”. I’ve read the Gospels and Acts out of curiosity, and dipped into the Torah, just to find out what the fuss was about. But for shits and giggles in college, I chose Biblical Hebrew as my foreign language requirement, and by the fourth semester was reading bits of Kings, Chronicles, and Samuel in the original. Can’t say that reading the Bible made me an atheist - Stephen Jay Gould, Terry Pratchett, and Mircea Eliade are more responsible for that - but seeing how parts of the Hebrew texts are corrupt, and having to do my own research as to what the text was actually saying, certainly put paid to any notion that it was of divine origin. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2019, 12:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/86 "2019-02-10T00:01:48Z")
> [@k9bfriender](#): > > Trouble finding a cite for it, so take it for what it’s worth, but, I was raised Lutheran, and I do remember my pastor talking about many parts of the bible that are never used in Lectionary Readings. > Hmmm, not specific to Lutheran, [but this talks about the lectionaries in general.](http://www.crivoice.org/lectionary/lectionlistot.html) > > Someone else can do the math to see how much of the rest is covered. For instance, I am not seeing kayaker’s favorite passage, in fact, it seems to go straight from Ezekiel 18 to 33, skipping over everything in between. > > You’ve read it cover to cover a bit, so you’ve got it covered, but anyone who just shows up and listens is only getting a part of the whole. The Episcopal Church does occasionally have readings from the Apocrypha. ---
**Author:** ![HelenGawn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a88e4f/32.png) [@HelenGawn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/HelenGawn)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2019, 7:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/87 "2019-02-10T07:14:24Z")
> [@Larry\_Borgia](#): > > I’m closer to read than skimmed, so that’s what I put. I’ve read the entire new testament a couple of times and a lot of the old, but I skimmed a lot of the genealogy and Jewish law. > > I’m kind of with **EscAlaMike** on the historical fiction bit. How can you say that the Psalms, for example, are historical fiction? That’s like saying Leaves of Grass is historical fiction. > > If anyone is interested, I found [This book](https://www.amazon.com/Bible-Designed-Literature-Testaments-Version/dp/0671879596) to be a great way of getting at the meat of the Bible without having to deal with the repetitive boring bits or the inexplicable tiny print and numbering system. That page says it has a “new introduction.” How do you update “In the Beginning…”? And thanks for that link, Larry. I like that it’s KJV, which is what I grew up with. I expected something more modern. ---
**Author:** ![Novelty\_Bobble](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Novelty\_Bobble](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Novelty_Bobble)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2019, 9:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/88 "2019-02-10T09:31:42Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Post 65. :smack: I just assumed yours was sober explanation of the theological issues and that no-one else would be as flippant as me. ---
**Author:** ![F.U.Shakespeare](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/aca169/32.png) [@F.U.Shakespeare](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/F.U.Shakespeare)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2019, 11:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/89 "2019-02-10T11:53:15Z")
I actually \*became \*an atheist as a result of reading the bible for confirmation class when I was about 14. (More accurately, I realized that I had always been an atheist, but had previously been repeating what I’d been told to when asked if I believed in God). We read the entire New Testament, and parts of the Hebrew Testament, over the course of a year and a half. We also memorized passages like the 23rd Psalm, the Apostles’ Creed, and First Corinthians 13. The latter fascinated me, because of the similarity of “without love I have nothing” to the Beatles’ “all you need is love”. The dealbreaker for me was the magic: I didn’t have a problem with (most of) the moral arguments, but I saw no evidence for the supernatural claims, just like I’d never believed in ESP, astrology, ghosts, etc. ---
**Author:** ![Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mean_mr.mustard/32/3865_2.png) [@Mean\_Mr.Mustard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mean_Mr.Mustard)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2019, 12:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/90 "2019-02-10T12:38:37Z")
I voted ‘other’ because there was no ‘less than skimmed’ option. mmm ---
**Author:** ![DesertDog](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/desertdog/32/11503_2.png) [@DesertDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DesertDog)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2019, 1:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/91 "2019-02-10T13:13:32Z")
Read it once, when I got a Kindle so I could pick up exactly where I left off. It took almost three years. I term myself a strong agnostic (tr. a pedantic atheist\*) > [@k9bfriender](#): > > He certainly implied that an atheist would not know what a “good samaritan” was, were it not part of our culture. When I was active in the Libertarian Party, our county put on the state convention one year. I don’t _know_ if one of the members of the committee was an atheist – the subject never came up – but he was definitely counter culture. His father was with Jack Kerouac when he was “[on the road](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/On_the_Road).” Anyway, With Meals was an option offered and when the budget was getting tight for the biggest meal, the Saturday banquet, somebody made a crack about loaves and fishes. The guy in question had no idea why the rest of us were chuckling. \*I find the proofs some atheists put up for the non-existence of any gods to be less than convincing (it is hard to prove the negative) but find the evidence provided by theists to be specious, to the point where I have stopped looking. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2019, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/92 "2019-02-10T13:49:08Z")
> [@EscAlaMike](#): > > Hmm…you might want to learn a little bit more about it before claiming that a collected library of 73 separate books can be classified under one genre, not to mention a genre that, for all intents and purposes, didn’t even exist until the 17th century (historical fiction). No thanks. I don’t watch RomComs, but people are always suggesting a movie that I know I won’t like because it’s a RomCom. “But (famous actress) shows some boob!” Heh, I don’t like RomComs. I am so thankful that I was raised without religion. My mom was Jewish, my dad was P-something (Protestant or Presbyterian I never get it right). They exposed me to a bit of all religions and it all seemed nuts to me. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2019, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/93 "2019-02-10T14:39:52Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Post 65. > [@Novelty\_Bobble](#): > > :smack: > **I just assumed yours was sober explanation of the theological issues** and that no-one else would be as flippant as me. Don’t worry about it; it’s completely understandable. I’m famous for those… ---
**Author:** ![Napier](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ce73a5/32.png) [@Napier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Napier)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2019, 3:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/94 "2019-02-10T15:14:54Z")
Waded through it because it’s significant in my society, but, the begats and all the violence are certainly tedious. It was decades ago and I retained little. ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2019, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/95 "2019-02-10T16:30:55Z")
Parable: every summer, my best friend and I travel around, stop off the beaten track and collect stones that are there. She mostly focuses on the ones that are prettiest, whereas I am attracted to the ones that tell a story. The language of the million/billion-year story that a particular stone reveals may, possibly, be translated into text, but it is much easier to reach without that investment. It is better to let the ages and torments of which it speaks to just wash over you in a vague sense. The concepts held by a deity would have a similar relationship to human language. It would lose way too much in translation for the translation to have any useful value. I have read and perused many parts of the bible, and if the words claim to be the wisdom of a superbeing, the translation is terrible. ---
**Author:** ![k9bfriender](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/k9bfriender/32/3283_2.png) [@k9bfriender](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/k9bfriender)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2019, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/96 "2019-02-10T16:35:13Z")
> [@HelenGawn](#): > > That page says it has a “new introduction.” How do you update “In the Beginning…”? String theory? > [@DesertDog](#): > > Read it once, when I got a Kindle so I could pick up exactly where I left off. It took almost three years. I term myself a strong agnostic (tr. a pedantic atheist\*)When I was active in the Libertarian Party, our county put on the state convention one year. I don’t _know_ if one of the members of the committee was an atheist – the subject never came up – but he was definitely counter culture. His father was with Jack Kerouac when he was “[on the road](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/On_the_Road).” Anyway, With Meals was an option offered and when the budget was getting tight for the biggest meal, the Saturday banquet, somebody made a crack about loaves and fishes. The guy in question had no idea why the rest of us were chuckling. > > \*I find the proofs some atheists put up for the non-existence of any gods to be less than convincing (it is hard to prove the negative) but find the evidence provided by theists to be specious, to the point where I have stopped looking. I’ve worked with a number of ignorant theists. A joke that I sometimes tell, that is actually kinda pro-religion, is about the scientists competing with god. They say that they can do anything that God can do. When god challenges them to make man as he made man, they begin gathering dirt, at which point god interrupts, and says, “No, you get your _own_ dirt.” 😃 To which, an ignorant theist co-worker of mine responded, “That’s sacrilegious, besides, god made Adam from a rib.” :dubious: Another time, when I had asked this same person if he had swept the walk-in, and he replied “Yes.” even though I could still see the broom in the same spot that I had left it, I said, “Doesn’t that bible thingy have some mighty strong words about lying?”, “No.” , “Nothing in the Ten Commandments about bearing false witness?” “Huh, what does that mean?” 😕 But he took his religion very seriously. ---
**Author:** ![robardin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/43a26b/32.png) [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2019, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/97 "2019-02-10T19:05:50Z")
> [@HelenGawn](#): > > That page says it has a “new introduction.” How do you update “In the Beginning…”? Interesting question. It reminds me of the pic I have somewhere on my iPhone of leatherbound new editions of the Bible on a shelf at a Barnes and Noble reading “Signed By Author”. ---
**Author:** ![Wheelz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wheelz/32/5718_2.png) [@Wheelz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wheelz)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2019, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/98 "2019-02-10T19:41:11Z")
I tried reading it a few years back, figuring it’s something everybody should do once, even if I don’t believe what it says. Never even got through Genesis. Man, is that a dry read. ---
**Author:** ![eschereal](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eschereal/32/18939_2.png) [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2019, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/99 "2019-02-10T19:47:22Z")
> [@Wheelz](#): > > Never even got through Genesis. Man, is that a dry read. Dry, except for that one extremely wet part. ---
**Author:** ![susan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/susan/32/17537_2.png) [@susan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/susan)\ **Post date:** [February 10, 2019, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179/100 "2019-02-10T19:54:40Z")
> [@Wheelz](#): > > I tried reading it a few years back, figuring it’s something everybody should do once, even if I don’t believe what it says. > > Never even got through Genesis. Man, is that a dry read. Try [this version](https://www.amazon.com/Book-Genesis-Illustrated-R-Crumb/dp/0393061027/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1549828447&sr=8-1&keywords=crumb+genesis) of Genesis. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atheists-and-biblical-familiarity/829179.md?page=6)