For those people who recommend not explaining anything to kids: Yikes.
Kids who want to know answers should be encouraged in that pursuit. And the best answer is that truth. Why do you celebrate Christmas if you don’t believe in Christ? Your answer can be “any excuse for a party,” “Christians stole the Winter Solstice celebrations and I think it’s important to not let them win,” “it’s a cultural thing, and when other people give gifts to people they cherish I think it’s nice to do the same thing, because people are important even if that Jesus nonsense isn’t,” or whatever.
Lots of good answers, thanks to all who responded. I’ve got lots of time to ponder my final answer, as my son is only 14 months old. However lots of food for thought.
And Dan Norder, I agree with you, and intend to encourage my sons’ curiosity.
My kids have never asked. I suppose if they do I’ll reply “You’re right. No more christmas gifts for you!”
I’m not a very good atheist, but I just tell them (when a grandmother starts in with the religious junk) that we’re observing the traditional mid-winter celebration and launch into a explanation about the tilt of the earth and the length of day increasing and they wander off and play xbox until I stop explaining things.
It was never an issue. My wife and her mother went to church, but they know I wasn’t Christian, so my father in law (who is an atheist also) and I stayed home. The reason for them going to church was to hear the songs. In general, Christmas was a time for presents and food, and religion never got mentioned. We had a tree, but no angels or stuff like that.
Since that was the way it was from the time they remembered, no issues.
“As we all know, Christmas is that mystical time of year when the ghost of Jesus rises from the grave to feast on the flesh of the living! So we all sing Christmas Carols to lull him back to sleep.” Peter Griffin.
Friends are just enemies that don’t have the guts to kill you.
Probably my strongest advice on childrearing is to always fully answer any question they ask to the best of your ability - and if you don’t know, show them how to look up the answer.
Yeah - my little heathens never had a problem with x-mas having its origin as a winter celebration of lights around the winter solstice that was usurped by the christians. Even to a child it makes a hell of a lot more sense that the whole virgin birth son of god nonsense!
“Human beings worship the great God Santa - a creature with fearsome claws - and his wife Mary. And every Christmas Eve, the people go to war with the country of Turkey. They then eat the Turkey people for Christmas dinner.”
Isaac Asimov was a lifelong and very vociferous atheist, but that didn’t stop him from cheerfully celebrating every religious holiday in the calendar – especially if it involved food. He loved to sing Christmas carols.
Although I’m an atheist, for me Christmas is about celebrating light in the midst of darkness and hope in the midst of despair. I think the Nativity story is a lovely way to illustrate that–here’s this little baby, born in a barn to a poor woman who’s not even married, and he brings joy and hope to the whole world. I don’t believe it really happened, but it’s a sweet story.
I don’t have kids, but I once had a coworker question me why I celebrated Christmas as an atheist. My answer was that I was culturally Christian. My dad was raised Catholic and although I was raised in a secular household, we always celebrated Christmas. It is tradition.
Christmas is such an overwhelming secular holiday/festival that it’s perfectly easy to celebrate it without even thinking about the religious aspects. If anything, I would think Christians would be offended by the profane commercialism.
There was never a tie between religion and Christmas in Casa de Hook. As mentioned above it was just one of those cultural things. The Little Hook, age 39 never got around to questioning it.
I prefer to think that my ribcage was three sizes too big…
I cordially detest Christmas and all the attendant glut and mercantilism–but I do celebrate the Solstice and everybody’s fine with that. My grandson makes me Solstice cards, cutest things you’ve ever seen!
My kids and I have a tradition of putting a bear on top of the tree, since we’re pagans celebrating the winter solstice.
Like others have said before me, the mid-winter celebration has been around a lot longer than Christianity.
I’ve never been in this situation, being neither an atheist (at this point), nor a parent. But this is what I think my dad would say:
“Pede, I may not believe Jesus was the son of God, but he was certainly a very good man, who helped change the world with his actions and beliefs. And every year, to honor his accomplishments, we all try to act a little more like him, by helping each other and giving gifts. Kinda like Martin Luther King Jr. day, but bigger.”
Broadly, we are, and say we are, observing and enjoying a delightful cultural holiday. More specifically, depending on age, we realize it has religious origins, including some Christian history, and some mythology, and we can even enjoy that mystique (I find the climax of Polar Express perfectly charming even though it is about belief in Santa).
My favorite thing about Christmas is that it is the most important holiday in the USA and that it is celebrated primarily by spending time with family and friends and, particularly, by giving them gifts to try to bring them joy. How exquisitely wonderful is this? I mean, there are places where the most important holiday celebrates military strength and sudden changes in political structure!
Our kids are now nine and ten. Past Santa believing. I was raised Catholic. Brainiac4 was raised atheist. He says he didn’t know that Christmas was about the birth of Christ for a lot of people until he was a teenager. We are “cultural Christians” - we are practicing Unitarians.
I even have a manger. And tell the Christmas story. I tell it as “some people believe this” - the whole Son of God stuff. Its a story. A family travels with a pregnant wife…no room at the inn…baby born in a manger…will grow up to save the world…" Its almost like Harry Potter. As they’ve gotten older they’ve built on a variety of religious foundations. I think its important to teach non-believing kids to respect the beliefs of others. My kids went through a stage where they were both “believers” (in what, they really couldn’t say - but everyone else believed in God), and I think are both back to “it doesn’t make much difference.” Little agnostics.
The Christmas story can wait another two Christmases or so - about four is when the baby thing is a little interesting - if you care to be the one to tell it. Expect some confusion between Santa and Jesus. There are plenty of children’s books that tell the Christmas story - and your own words around reading it will place the story in context for your kids.
