# Athena and Byzantine's Naked Pillow Fight

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [January 5, 2000, 8:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750 "2000-01-05T20:17:00Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 7

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**Author:** ![Frankie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/258eb7/32.png) [@Frankie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frankie)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/121 "2000-01-07T19:41:00Z")

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Frankie thinking feverishly exclaims “Eureka!” and throws a sock at Cyan.

He then says “Looks like you’ll have to pin me down too, Cyan!”

* * *

-Frankie

I’m not a shrimp, I’m a King Prawn.  
-Pepe the Prawn

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**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/122 "2000-01-07T19:42:00Z")

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Yeah, I know Byz. it’s that competitive side of me. That being said…

SQUIRT!

Ohh, THAT looks like it hurt!

\< Flips Byzantine over, pins her arms down \>

you see? good will always lose to evil, because good is dumb!

\< Grins down \> Now, let’s try that _again_. “Sealemon88 is my king…”

* * *

You say “cheesy” like that’s a **BAD** thing.

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**Author:** ![Byzantine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/dfb087/32.png) [@Byzantine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Byzantine)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/123 "2000-01-07T20:01:00Z")

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Byzantine, being very greased up at this point, easily slips out from under Sealemon. Luckily, the oil has also protected her private parts from the hot sauce. It slides right off.

“Then it’s a damn good thing that I’m evil!”

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**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/124 "2000-01-07T20:22:00Z")

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\< Beaning Byzantine with a sock \>

Yeah? I’m not done yet! I’ll-- \< trips, because he forgot his ancles were still bound with the peanut butter covered sock \>.  
\< Looking around at all the evily grinning women \>

Well, shit.

* * *

You say “cheesy” like that’s a **BAD** thing.

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**Author:** ![Vestal\_Blue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/5e9695/32.png) [@Vestal\_Blue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vestal_Blue)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/125 "2000-01-07T20:57:00Z")

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VB, coming to sealemon88s’ rescue, comes screaming in out of the sun: “Yah, sheena!” he yells, as he lays about him with two dripping, cheesy socks. "take that, you wonderfully evil, slickery women! And that! And that! That’ll larn ya!

* * *

VB

TANSTAAFL!

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**Author:** ![Byzantine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/dfb087/32.png) [@Byzantine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Byzantine)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/126 "2000-01-07T21:07:00Z")

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“Hi keeba!” Byzantine yells, flinging herself bodily at Vestal Blue. “Athena, quick, wrap those socks around their hands and feet! Orangecakes, smother them BOTH with peanut butter.”

* * *

Best!  
Byz

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**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/127 "2000-01-07T21:40:00Z")

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**"GYMKATA!!!"**

\< With a shoulder roll, Sealemon escapes Athena’s clutches. It seems that all that oily stuff Byz is covered with rubbed off on Sealemon too. \>

"Hmmmm. VB and myself against three women? Sounds like fun, but hardly fair.

Flypside? where are you?

**WE NEED PILLOW NINJA POWER, NOW!!!**

* * *

You say “cheesy” like that’s a **BAD** thing.

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**Author:** ![Vestal\_Blue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/5e9695/32.png) [@Vestal\_Blue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vestal_Blue)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/128 "2000-01-07T22:07:00Z")

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Yeah, right Orangecakes! Catch me if you can! (As VB split-esses away)You’re not getting near me with that PB, at least, not without the chocolate syrup! BTW, who took my Cinnamon oil?!

C’mon Sealemon, the day we can’t handle three slippery, naked amazons hasn’t dawned!

* * *

VB

TANSTAAFL!

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**Author:** ![Athena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/35a633/32.png) [@Athena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Athena)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/129 "2000-01-07T22:08:00Z")

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With a quick flick of her wrist, Athena invokes her Goddess powers and instantly all the slippery gook is OFF of the girls, and onto VB, Sealemon, and Flypside (who has just wandered into the room, and has no idea what’s going on, why he’s covered with oil, or what all the feathers are for.)

“heheheehe, we got 'em now, girls.” she cries, and launches a pillow at the three!

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**Author:** ![Surgoshan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@Surgoshan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Surgoshan)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/130 "2000-01-07T22:17:00Z")

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Surgoshan comes in and starts blushing horrendously.

He grins.

“Gee…”

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**Author:** ![Frankie](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/258eb7/32.png) [@Frankie](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Frankie)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/131 "2000-01-07T22:20:00Z")

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ok now its 3 oiled up guys…

Time to turn off the camera!

* * *

-Frankie  
Lack of charisma can be fatal

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**Author:** ![Surgoshan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@Surgoshan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Surgoshan)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 10:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/132 "2000-01-07T22:38:00Z")

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Now, where should I go fir

OW! Mom! Ow! I wasn’t watching! Honest! I, um, I Ow!

No, don’t tell Daina, no mom no please no no no no

No, honey, nothing But… I mea… Come o… Don’… Bu… bu… I lo… no, I wasn’… bu… Awwww. _click_

Well, shucks. Now that that’s over, anyone at all sore from al this exertion and need a massage? Oil? Socks? I’ll mop up back there for a favor.

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**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/133 "2000-01-07T22:55:00Z")

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Do you want creamy or chunky?Ha!  
Alright Byz!wheres the pillows now??!  
\<jumps on Byz!Piggyback ride!\>  
(this is fun,I’m not going home!Yahoo\*

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**Author:** ![Vestal\_Blue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/5e9695/32.png) [@Vestal\_Blue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vestal_Blue)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/134 "2000-01-07T22:57:00Z")

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VB, pouring 90 weight gear oil over Athena:

There! take that! Let’s see your ersatz goddess powers get rid of that stuff!

Bwaaahahahahah!

* * *

VB

TANSTAAFL!

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**Author:** ![Athena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/35a633/32.png) [@Athena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Athena)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 10:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/135 "2000-01-07T22:58:00Z")

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\<Vestal Blue crumples in a ball of lightening\>

“Where’re all the other Gods? How come I’m here by myself? Satan? Catrandom? Cowgod?”

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**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/136 "2000-01-07T23:00:00Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> “heheheehe, we got 'em now, girls.” she cries, and launches a pillow at the three!

And Sealemon catches it!

“D’oh!” Exclaims Athena, just before getting whaled in the head by her own pillow.

VB and Sealemon stand ready, pillows swinging.

“So where _is_ Flypside anyway? Aww screw it!”

“ **GYYYYYYYMMMKAAAADAAAAAA!** ”

* * *

You say “cheesy” like that’s a **BAD** thing.

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**Author:** ![Vestal\_Blue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/5e9695/32.png) [@Vestal\_Blue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vestal_Blue)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 11:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/137 "2000-01-07T23:08:00Z")

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As VB and Sealemon dive in swinging, Athena is wiping gear oil out of sensitive places and the other two scatter!

We’ve got’em on the run!, Exults VB.

* * *

VB

TANSTAAFL!

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**Author:** ![Athena](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/35a633/32.png) [@Athena](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Athena)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/138 "2000-01-07T23:38:00Z")

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“Damn!” exults Athena, as she realizes that it’s 4:30 on a Friday night. She slowly begins fading, moaning all the while “my home modem is broken! I can’t defend myself until Monday! Keep the spirit alive, my mighty comrades!”

She becomes blurry, then fades more, and suddenly, she’s gone…

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**Author:** ![Vestal\_Blue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/5e9695/32.png) [@Vestal\_Blue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vestal_Blue)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/139 "2000-01-07T23:56:00Z")

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A cheap way for Athena to leave the fight, however, alas, I too must depart until Monday.

Refresh, recuperate, rearm!

* * *

VB

TANSTAAFL!

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**Author:** ![Sealemon88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c68b51/32.png) [@Sealemon88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sealemon88)\
**Post date:** [January 7, 2000, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athena-and-byzantines-naked-pillow-fight/15750/140 "2000-01-07T23:58:00Z")

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Oh, gee. Athena left. That just leaves Byz and orange it looks like. VB, you get orange.

I’ve got a whole tallboy of whoop ass for Byzantine.

\< Swinging a pillow in each hand, in the traditional Shoulin Praying Mantis/Rabid Panda hybrid style of Pillow Fu \>.

* * *

You say “cheesy” like that’s a **BAD** thing.

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