# Athletes with the most appropriate names **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [August 21, 2008, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762 "2008-08-21T03:34:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 19\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Ichbin\_Dubist](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/51bf81/32.png) [@Ichbin\_Dubist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ichbin_Dubist)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2008, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/61 "2008-08-23T22:49:54Z")
[Gerd Bonk](http://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gerd_Bonk) is such a mellifluous name for a weightlifter. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Controvert](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dec6dc/32.png) [@The\_Controvert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Controvert)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2008, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/62 "2008-08-23T22:55:54Z")
As a hurdler, Lolo Jones could not jump high high enough. ---
**Author:** ![TheBoltEater](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/779978/32.png) [@TheBoltEater](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheBoltEater)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2008, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/63 "2008-08-24T03:03:40Z")
[QUOTE=wheresgeorge04] [Alge Crumpler](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Alge_Crumpler). Not a defensive player, unfortunately, but an awesome American football name… Joe [/QUOTE] I always preferred his older brother Carlester Crumpler. ---
**Author:** ![jovan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/0ea827/32.png) [@jovan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jovan)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2008, 5:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/64 "2008-08-24T05:18:04Z")
I’m watching the volleyball final between Brasil and the US. The American team has a player named Lloy **Ball**. ---
**Author:** ![It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/it_s_not_rocket_surgery/32/312_2.png) [@It\_s\_Not\_Rocket\_Surgery](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/It_s_Not_Rocket_Surgery)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2008, 1:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/65 "2008-08-24T13:08:50Z")
[QUOTE=robardin] Or J.J. Putz as a closer for the Mariners. The first time I heard of him was while looking over the box scores and saw him listed as the losing pitcher with a blown save. “L: Putz (BS)”. I now know it’s pronounced “Pyoots”. But all the same, it’s a good thing he’s not blowing saves while playing for a NY team. [/QUOTE] I remember the time when Putz lost a game to the Yankees’ Chien-Ming Wang! Unfortunately, Wang’s name is pronounced “Wong”. ---
**Author:** ![brownie55](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f14d63/32.png) [@brownie55](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brownie55)\ **Post date:** [August 24, 2008, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/66 "2008-08-24T15:49:07Z")
I just remembered Marco [VELO.](http://www.versus.com/tdf/riderinfo/riderinfo.php?ss=rider&id=159) He placed 44th in the Tour de France. Velo is French for bicycle. ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2008, 7:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/67 "2008-08-26T19:09:14Z")
The Australian women’s basketball team in the just-concluded Olympics had a player named Jenny [Screen.](http://www.usatoday.com/travel/cruises/item.aspx?type=photo&photo_id=08iSgLQfJH3ql&tid=0ePy51D3Zm6kk&pn=27) Two decades ago, an appropriate choice to set a screen was [Carlton](http://fausports.cstv.com/sports/m-baskbl/spec-rel/092304aaa.html) of the Providence College Friars. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [August 26, 2008, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/68 "2008-08-26T19:30:11Z")
[QUOTE=robardin] And isn’t there a tennis player named Smashnova? Though perhaps her true calling is in Demolition Derby. [/QUOTE] There is a now-retired Israeli player named Anna Smashnova. She was married for a few years during her career, which temporarily changed her name to the less appropriate Pistolesi or Smashnova-Pistolesi. But at least she didn’t marry a guy named L’Oeuf or Long or anything. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Comfy\_Chair](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/9de053/32.png) [@The\_Comfy\_Chair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Comfy_Chair)\ **Post date:** [August 27, 2008, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/69 "2008-08-27T20:16:58Z")
I have a few. Mack Strong - What better name could you possibly think of for a fullback? This is like straight out of a movie. Webster Slaughter - The name ‘Slaughter’ on the back of an opposing jersey no doubt brought happy fuzzy feelings to quarterbacks everywhere. Not an athlete but still a fantastic name. One of the reporters out here is named Wei Wong. At the end of her bit she’d go, “…and that’s the weather for today, I’m Wei Wong. Back to you”. Made me giggle every time. ---
**Author:** ![robardin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/43a26b/32.png) [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)\ **Post date:** [August 28, 2008, 12:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/70 "2008-08-28T00:15:22Z")
[QUOTE=The Comfy Chair] Not an athlete but still a fantastic name. One of the reporters out here is named Wei Wong. At the end of her bit she’d go, “…and that’s the weather for today, I’m Wei Wong. Back to you”. Made me giggle every time. [/QUOTE] I remember two friends of mine in college hooked up to play bridge one evening at a tournament. One was named Sari (Latvian) and the other was named Rong (Chinese), and they were both rather inexperienced. Being nice people at heart, rather than excoriating partner for making costly mistakes, each would instead apologize for making their own costly mistakes (a rare virtue among bridge players of any level of experience). We joked that their conversations all went like this: “I’m Sari, really I am…” “No no, It was I who was Rong…” ---
**Author:** ![Phatlewt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a698b9/32.png) [@Phatlewt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Phatlewt)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 6:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/71 "2008-09-03T18:54:31Z")
[Scott Speed](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scott_Speed) is a racing driver. He has been in Formula One, GP2, A1GP, and now races in [ARCA](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/ARCA). ---
**Author:** ![Mince](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecd19e/32.png) [@Mince](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mince)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/72 "2008-09-03T22:05:02Z")
There was **Triathlete Startrackrunner**. He played baseball IIRC. ---
**Author:** ![cmkeller](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmkeller/32/118_2.png) [@cmkeller](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmkeller)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/73 "2008-09-03T22:14:09Z")
Just last night, the Oakland Athletics sent a pitcher named Josh Outman to face the Royals - he lived up to his name pretty well. ---
**Author:** ![Mince](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecd19e/32.png) [@Mince](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mince)\ **Post date:** [September 3, 2008, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/74 "2008-09-03T23:59:00Z")
Then there was **Johnny Givesupgrandslams**. Wisely, he chose a career in football. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Controvert](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/dec6dc/32.png) [@The\_Controvert](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Controvert)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2008, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/75 "2008-09-04T04:53:05Z")
The Georgia men’s beach volleyball team at the Olympics were the duo of Geor and Gia. ---
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2008, 2:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/76 "2008-09-04T14:24:04Z")
My college had a cheerleader named Felicia Bumpass. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2008, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/77 "2008-09-04T14:25:24Z")
> [@Marley23](#): > > There is a now-retired Israeli player named Anna Smashnova. And Sybille Bammer is now highly ranked. ---
**Author:** ![Ponch8](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponch8/32/9883_2.png) [@Ponch8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponch8)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2008, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/78 "2008-09-04T17:32:40Z")
There was a pitcher for the Pirates, Mariners, and several other teams named Blas Minor. Not surprisingly, he spent a large portion of his career in the minors. ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2008, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762/79 "2008-09-05T13:31:29Z")
For the first season in which steals were an official NBA statistical category, the league leader was Portland’s [Larry Steele](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Larry_Steele). [Will Wynn](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Will_Wynn_(football_player)) happened to be a football player, but his name would have been appropriate for any sport. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/athletes-with-the-most-appropriate-names/460762.md?page=3)