# Atre Bikinis Appropriate for Backyard pool Parties?

**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [April 13, 2003, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489 "2003-04-13T20:01:19Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![ralph124c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/8797f3/32.png) [@ralph124c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ralph124c)
#### Post date: [April 13, 2003, 8:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/1 "2003-04-13T20:01:19Z")

</div>

We just got ourpool installed-and I am going to invite the neighbors. I’m wondering if these gals will show up wearing dorky swimsuits, or if a few would be so nice as to wearthongs. Is it polite to specify attire on an invitation? I wouldlike our female friends to be a bit adventurous as far as swimwear goes.  
Anybody with experience with pool parties?  
How can I SUGGEST that smaller swimsuits wouldbe welcome?  
A dirty old man!

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)
#### Post date: [April 13, 2003, 8:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/2 "2003-04-13T20:08:09Z")

</div>

I don’t think it’s appropriate to suggest that your neighbours wear small swimsuits. But if you put “Swimsuits Optional” on the invitations, they might get the idea. 😉 (Of course, they may not show up _at all!_)

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)
#### Post date: [April 13, 2003, 8:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/3 "2003-04-13T20:18:38Z")

</div>

Now this is my kind of Great Debate.

“I just got my pool installed. Let’s kick off the summer-- bring your best swimsuit and let’s have a party!”

I’m sure your female freinds will know that “best” means “skimpiest”.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/50afbb/32.png) [@Duck\_Duck\_Goose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duck_Duck_Goose)
#### Post date: [April 13, 2003, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/4 "2003-04-13T20:19:11Z")

</div>

Female here. If you really, seriously wanted to specify tiny swimsuits without offending anyone, you could hold an “Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini Pool Party” and specify “bikinis”. Or you could have a “Thong Song Pool Party” and specify “thongs”.

And, you’ll have to be a non-discriminatory host and accept, and expect, bikinis and thongs on your **male** guests, too.

IMO it would be tacky, not to say outright offensive, to specify, “All you gals, show up in as little clothing as possible”, because that’s sexist, and tantamount to saying, “I want lots of nekkid wimmin at my pool party”. And I know you probably do want lots of nekkid wimmin at your pool party, but the way to get nekkid wimmin at your pool party without offending anybody who might not have realized that’s what “be adventurous” meant is to make it an official Nekkid Pool Party–and, again, you’ll have to be prepared to see your male guests nekkid, too.

Not to mention being ready to display your own manly charms to the assembled multitude. 'Taint fair to keep your bathrobe on when everybody else is in the buff. 😃

And if it’s a Bikini Party or a Thong Party–you’ll be suitably costumed, too, woncha? 😉

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![Stoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stoid/32/272_2.png) [@Stoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stoid)
#### Post date: [April 13, 2003, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/5 "2003-04-13T20:23:19Z")

</div>

What kind of pool, Ralph? How big, how much, what part of the country? (I just bought a house with the intention of building a pool, looking for input)

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)
#### Post date: [April 13, 2003, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/6 "2003-04-13T20:28:06Z")

</div>

A couple of guys were cruising the beach in their Speedos in search of women. One of them, a bulb of especially low wattage, complained that he had been discouragingly unsuccessful. The other said, “You need to impress them. Do as I do, and put a potato in your Speedos.”

A couple of hours later, Dim-Bulb came back nearly in tears. “I can’t understand it! I put a potato in my Speedos; and now, not only are the women not talking to me, they’re _running away!_”

The other glances down at his friend and says, “You’re supposed to put the potato _in the front!_”

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)
#### Post date: [April 13, 2003, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/7 "2003-04-13T21:29:01Z")

</div>

Put “No dorky swimsuits, thongs required” right on the invitations. That will guarantee that all the women who attend will be in thongs.

I should probably mention that we just covered vacuous truths in my logic class.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![Sam\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Sam\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sam_Stone)
#### Post date: [April 13, 2003, 9:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/8 "2003-04-13T21:38:10Z")

</div>

> [@](#):
>
> Put “No dorky swimsuits, thongs required” right on the invitations. That will guarantee that all the women who attend will be in thongs.

It’ll probably also guarantee that the number of women in attendance will be approximately zero.

My advice: It’s awkward enough to get into a bathing suit and go over to a neighbor’s home for a pool party. If the women get any sense that you have an ulterior motive (to stare at their fine semi-naked forms), they’ll avoid you like the plague.

Invite the neighbors over. Don’t worry about the bathing suits they are wearing. You’ll live if you have to stare at a woman in a one-piece.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![DoctorJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctorj/32/2904_2.png) [@DoctorJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DoctorJ)
#### Post date: [April 14, 2003, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/9 "2003-04-14T00:43:56Z")

</div>

Make it a patriotic thing.

“Support your country–show some American skin!”

“If we can’t see your bare ass, the terrorists have already won!”

You could always make “Democracy! Whiskey! Sexy!” the theme of the party.

Dr. J

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)
#### Post date: [April 14, 2003, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/10 "2003-04-14T00:52:59Z")

</div>

The best way is to have a teenage or college age daughter, and let her have the party.

My friend with just such a daughter appoints himself lifeguard and enjoys the sights.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![David\_B](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/51bf81/32.png) [@David\_B](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/David_B)
#### Post date: [April 14, 2003, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/11 "2003-04-14T01:13:26Z")

</div>

[Moderator Hat: ON]

This is **not** a Great Debate. I’m moving it to MPSIMS.

* * *

David B, SDMB Great Debates Moderator

[Moderator Hat: OFF]

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![Evil\_Captor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f17d59/32.png) [@Evil\_Captor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Evil_Captor)
#### Post date: [April 14, 2003, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/12 "2003-04-14T01:15:51Z")

</div>

I’d say your best shot at getting women to wear thongs at your pool would be to have the feeling relaxed, comfortable and at home at your pool. “Encouraging” them to wear thongs is not likely to produce such a state of mind.

BTW, unless you’re in some kind of “adults only” enclave, the vast majority of guests at your pool are gonna be kids.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)
#### Post date: [April 14, 2003, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/13 "2003-04-14T02:37:04Z")

</div>

> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Sam Stone \*  
> \*\*It’ll probably also guarantee that the number of women in attendance will be approximately zero.  
> \*\*

Exactly. That’s what makes it a vacuous truth.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![Lobsang](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobsang/32/4067_2.png) [@Lobsang](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lobsang)
#### Post date: [April 14, 2003, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/14 "2003-04-14T04:09:13Z")

</div>

> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by David B \*  
> \*\*[Moderator Hat: ON]
> 
> This is **not** a Great Debate. I’m moving it to MPSIMS.
> 
> * * *
> 
> David B, SDMB Great Debates Moderator
> 
> [Moderator Hat: OFF] \*\*

Surely your moderator hat is permanently on?

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)
#### Post date: [April 14, 2003, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/15 "2003-04-14T04:36:57Z")

</div>

The only way I can see that you can order attractive women to show up at your swimming pool wearing skimpy bikinis, is to have previously arranged to be Hugh Hefner. Otherwise, success is unlikely.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![InternetLegend](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/internetlegend/32/13154_2.png) [@InternetLegend](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/InternetLegend)
#### Post date: [April 14, 2003, 6:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/16 "2003-04-14T06:36:28Z")

</div>

I don’t know what kind of neighborhood you’re in, but I would pay money **not** to have to see any of my neighbors in a thong. In fact, I’d really prefer everyone, men and women alike, to wear those suits with the little skirts attached. And maybe blousy full-length tops.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)
#### Post date: [April 14, 2003, 6:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/17 "2003-04-14T06:55:05Z")

</div>

**Johnny L.A.** I loved the joke but wouldn’t a sausage be better than a potato?

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![Audrey\_Levins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Audrey\_Levins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Audrey_Levins)
#### Post date: [April 14, 2003, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/18 "2003-04-14T07:07:33Z")

</div>

> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Scylla \*  
> \*\*The best way is to have a teenage or college age daughter, and let her have the party.
> 
> My friend with just such a daughter appoints himself lifeguard and enjoys the sights. \*\*

**Scylla,** this is gross. I can see why Your Friend would _want_ to do this, in a sick midlife crisis kinda way, but it’s still gross.

Appointing yourself lifeguard over your teenage daughter’s pool party, for the express purpose of staring at her teenaged friends’ scantily clad asses, is Just Gross. These girls are Your Friend’s daughter’s age! How would Your Friend feel if he knew some other fifty-something father was ogling _his_ daughter? “Oh, honey, are you going over to Samantha’s house? Make sure to put on your skimpiest bikini! Samantha’s dad’s gonna be there! Spread the joy!”

UGH.

Buy a Playboy. That way you don’t know _any_ of 'em.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![Audrey\_Levins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Audrey\_Levins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Audrey_Levins)
#### Post date: [April 14, 2003, 7:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/19 "2003-04-14T07:09:24Z")

</div>

By the way, I stared at this thread title for a good five seconds, wondering why I wasn’t cool enough to know what “Atre Bikinis” were, and why they wouldn’t be appropriate for a backyard pool party.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

### Author: ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)
#### Post date: [April 14, 2003, 7:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489/20 "2003-04-14T07:10:39Z")

</div>

According to what I’ve seen on TV, opening a bottle of the approprite brand of beer will cause numerous bikini-clad women to arrive at your party and begin frolicking. TV wouldn’t lie, now would it?

(I will leave it for someone else to make the necessary Schmidt’s Gay joke)

[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/atre-bikinis-appropriate-for-backyard-pool-parties/168489.md?page=2)
