# Attack of the Butter Ninjas **URL:** \ **Category:** Factual Questions\ **Created:** [July 11, 2003, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-of-the-butter-ninjas/187599 "2003-07-11T00:43:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 3:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-of-the-butter-ninjas/187599/21 "2003-07-11T15:37:56Z")
(of course the recoil would be something pretty shocking - our butter-gun will probably not turn out to be a hand-held weapon) ---
**Author:** ![gazpacho](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/6f9a4e/32.png) [@gazpacho](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gazpacho)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-of-the-butter-ninjas/187599/22 "2003-07-11T15:41:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Mangetout \* > \*\*Yes, but the energy that the bullet-proof vest is dissipating is only that of a relatively small mass; if you were able to accelerate the block of butter to the same velocity (leaving aside for a moment the problem of it remaining intact during flight), it would impart a great deal more energy to the target. \*\* So you agree with me you would have to throw the butter really fast. ---
**Author:** ![Trinopus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/2bfe46/32.png) [@Trinopus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trinopus)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 4:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-of-the-butter-ninjas/187599/23 "2003-07-11T16:18:17Z")
Fry food in it for the victim and hope his arteries clog? Is using a sling legal? How about a blow gun? If limited to me, my victim, the butter, and nothing else in the world (no tools, no strips of cloth, no nothin’) I think I might be best off tossing the butter in his face to distract him while I attack him with my bare hands. I can do a _lot_ more damage with my fists than I can with the butter, as far as I can figure. Trinopus ---
**Author:** ![Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/e8c25b/32.png) [@Really\_Not\_All\_That\_Bright](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Really_Not_All_That_Bright)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-of-the-butter-ninjas/187599/24 "2003-07-11T19:16:13Z")
I imagine a stick dropped from a plane would disintegrate before it ever reached the unlucky butteree… but if it worked… you could call it assault and buttery 😉 Gross (or grievous in Britain) buttery harm, even… Sorry, sorry, the butter puns end here… ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-of-the-butter-ninjas/187599/25 "2003-07-11T19:29:28Z")
If we’re only allowed the butter and bare hands, then I think **BraheSilver** ’s strategy is the most promising, if we’re allowed machinery, then accelerating the butter into some sort of high power dairy ion beam might be better. ---
**Author:** ![Finagle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/b19c9b/32.png) [@Finagle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Finagle)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 8:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-of-the-butter-ninjas/187599/26 "2003-07-11T20:59:20Z")
To amplify what Mangetout said, look up “High pressure injection injury” to get an idea of what a high pressure stream of solvent or grease can do. With the proper equipment, a stick of butter is entirely suitable for shortening someone’s life. ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-of-the-butter-ninjas/187599/27 "2003-07-11T22:17:17Z")
**Finagle** " a stick of butter is entirely suitable for **shortening** someone’s life." Ghee that was bad! ---
**Author:** ![frixxxx](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@frixxxx](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/frixxxx)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2003, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-of-the-butter-ninjas/187599/28 "2003-07-11T22:37:49Z")
“Boot to the head” All of you! ---
**Author:** ![casdave](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c6cbf5/32.png) [@casdave](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/casdave)\ **Post date:** [July 12, 2003, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-of-the-butter-ninjas/187599/29 "2003-07-12T15:00:06Z")
If you got lots of butter sticks, and melted them in one huge tank, you could drown someone in it, the density is much less than water so I doubt it would be possible to swim to safety. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-of-the-butter-ninjas/187599.md?page=1)