# Attack squirrel on meth **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 19, 2019, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746 "2019-06-19T15:46:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 18\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2019, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/1 "2019-06-19T15:46:29Z")
[Man Gave Meth To ‘Attack Squirrel’ To Keep It Aggressive](https://www.huffpost.com/entry/alabama-methamphetamine-squirrel_n_5d092492e4b0f7b74427e2b5) > [@](#): > > An Alabama man accused of drug possession allegedly fed methamphetamine to a caged squirrel in order to keep it aggressive, police said… > > Whether the squirrel was actually fed meth may remain a mystery. Sheriff’s office spokesman Stephen Young told reporters there wasn’t a safe way to test the animal for drugs. The squirrel was set free. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2019, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/2 "2019-06-19T16:07:09Z")
There go his revival plans. ---
**Author:** ![MEBuckner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mebuckner/32/2896_2.png) [@MEBuckner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MEBuckner)\ **Post date:** [June 19, 2019, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/3 "2019-06-19T20:06:05Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > The squirrel was set free. Oh, great. Now there’s a meth-addicted squirrel running around loose in Alabama! (I’m sensing a great idea for a SyFy Channel movie, here.) ---
**Author:** ![VOW](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/vow/32/3043_2.png) [@VOW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VOW)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2019, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/4 "2019-06-20T04:11:47Z")
You can always stick it in your mouth and light it on fire! ~VOW ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2019, 7:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/5 "2019-06-20T07:58:16Z")
I only attack bears on meth. Never works out like it want it to. Meth is bad, Kids. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2019, 11:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/6 "2019-06-20T11:53:12Z")
Huh, I thought this thread was going to be about one of my least favorite radio personalities. ---
**Author:** ![Two\_Many\_Cats](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8dc957/32.png) [@Two\_Many\_Cats](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Two_Many_Cats)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2019, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/7 "2019-06-20T13:28:27Z")
What does a squirrel on meth say? “Here Doggy! C’mere boy!” ---
**Author:** ![Hopeful\_Crow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/da6949/32.png) [@Hopeful\_Crow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hopeful_Crow)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2019, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/8 "2019-06-20T17:41:02Z")
> [@VOW](#): > > You can always stick it in your mouth and light it on fire! > ~VOW Now where would you get that idea? ---
**Author:** ![Hopeful\_Crow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/da6949/32.png) [@Hopeful\_Crow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hopeful_Crow)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2019, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/9 "2019-06-20T17:46:54Z")
I think the hamsters are smoking something, too. Sometimes I can see my signature and sometimes I can’t. It should read this: Cigarettes are like squirrels. They’re perfectly harmless until you put one in your mouth and light it on fire. ---
**Author:** ![Steve\_McQwark](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4da419/32.png) [@Steve\_McQwark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_McQwark)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2019, 5:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/10 "2019-06-20T17:48:59Z")
> [@Darren\_Garrison](#): > > There go his revival plans. I thought Pascagoula was in Mississippi. ---
**Author:** ![KarlGauss](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/karlgauss/32/3713_2.png) [@KarlGauss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGauss)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2019, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/11 "2019-06-20T18:58:56Z")
> [@Johnny\_L.A](#): > > [Man Gave Meth To ‘Attack Squirrel’ To Keep It Aggressive](https://www.huffpost.com/entry/alabama-methamphetamine-squirrel_n_5d092492e4b0f7b74427e2b5) > > “An Alabama man accused of drug possession allegedly fed methamphetamine to a caged squirrel in order to keep it aggressive” > > The squirrel was set free. Reminds me of Pooh Bear (a fantastic Vincent D’Onofrio) and [his pet badger in Salton Sea](https://youtu.be/yUIekCsc3pU?t=50) (an underappreciated movie). ---
**Author:** ![carrps](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carrps/32/2957_2.png) [@carrps](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrps)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2019, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/12 "2019-06-20T20:19:30Z")
> [@KarlGauss](#): > > Reminds me of Pooh Bear (a fantastic Vincent D’Onofrio) and [his pet badger in Salton Sea](https://youtu.be/yUIekCsc3pU?t=50) (an underappreciated movie). I love _Salton Sea_. I’d never heard of it until I found it on cable a number of years. Liked it so much I bought the dvd. ---
**Author:** ![KarlGauss](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/karlgauss/32/3713_2.png) [@KarlGauss](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGauss)\ **Post date:** [June 20, 2019, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/13 "2019-06-20T20:36:10Z")
> [@carrps](#): > > I love _Salton Sea_. I’d never heard of it until I found it on cable a number of years. . . I blame [the critics](https://www.metacritic.com/movie/the-salton-sea/critic-reviews). ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 2:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/14 "2019-06-28T14:30:57Z")
…& he’s been [caught](https://www.al.com/news/2019/06/attack-squirrel-suspect-mickey-paulk-captured-in-limestone-county.html). ---
**Author:** ![Moriarty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moriarty/32/49_2.png) [@Moriarty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moriarty)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/15 "2019-06-28T19:35:11Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > I only attack bears on meth. Never works out like it want it to. Meth is bad, Kids. But how do you first get them to ingest it? ---
**Author:** ![MEBuckner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mebuckner/32/2896_2.png) [@MEBuckner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MEBuckner)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/16 "2019-06-28T21:19:43Z")
> [@Spiderman](#): > > …& he’s been [caught](https://www.al.com/news/2019/06/attack-squirrel-suspect-mickey-paulk-captured-in-limestone-county.html). But what about the squirrel? Has the _squirrel_ been caught? ---
**Author:** ![DinoR](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dinor/32/2821_2.png) [@DinoR](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DinoR)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 9:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/17 "2019-06-28T21:20:04Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > I only attack bears on meth. Never works out like it want it to. I’ve find it’s [del]better[/del] less horrible to attack the bears with a meth addiction. At least they are skinnier and have fewer teeth than the other bears. ---
**Author:** ![Moriarty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/moriarty/32/49_2.png) [@Moriarty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moriarty)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attack-squirrel-on-meth/835746/18 "2019-06-28T21:39:45Z")
> [@DinoR](#): > > I’ve find it’s [del]better[/del] less horrible to attack the bears with a meth addiction. At least they are skinnier and have fewer teeth than the other bears. They are also easier to find, since these are the bears that come up to you at the gas station and ask for money. “I have cubs back at my den and I just ran out of honey”