# Attention Hetero's: Please take back America **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [February 11, 2004, 5:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608 "2004-02-11T05:09:53Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Siege](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dbc845/32.png) [@Siege](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siege)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 11:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/21 "2004-02-11T11:25:13Z")
You know, I am a big-breasted, straight woman who loves big, burly men who are a bit macho. I even love and understand football, though not quite as much as I enjoy sex (hey, two balls are better than one!). I also don’t understand why women don’t enjoy giving blowjobs. I’m also quite definitely pro-homosexual, if such a position exists. **Brandus** , a post like yours makes it clear to me, that, much as I enjoy men, I will never have sex with you. It’s a bit of a shame. You see, I think giving guys multiple orgasms is fun! CJ ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 12:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/22 "2004-02-11T12:16:07Z")
Siege: Brandus is not going to miss having sex with you, either. Brandus is gay. ---
**Author:** ![Jervoise](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d2c977/32.png) [@Jervoise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jervoise)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 12:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/23 "2004-02-11T12:17:00Z")
> [@](#): > > It is _so_ tiring. > [@](#): > > … that’s just _super_ > [@](#): > > Hot damn! > [@](#): > > absolutely _impossible_ Man, it’s even happening to this thread! Ah! Gay everywhere! ---
**Author:** ![robertliguori](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/46a35a/32.png) [@robertliguori](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robertliguori)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/24 "2004-02-11T13:26:36Z")
> [@Siege](#): > > You know, I am a big-breasted, straight woman who loves big, burly men who are a bit macho. I even love and understand football, though not quite as much as I enjoy sex (hey, two balls are better than one!). I also don’t understand why women don’t enjoy giving blowjobs. I’m also quite definitely pro-homosexual, if such a position exists. > > **Brandus** , a post like yours makes it clear to me, that, much as I enjoy men, I will never have sex with you. It’s a bit of a shame. You see, I think giving guys multiple orgasms is fun! > > CJ On the grounds that this is far more revalent to my life than this lame-ass OP: Surely you don’t refer to multiple-orgasms as the term is commonly applied to women? Because if so, I’m going to have to demand a cite, or at least a how-to manual. ---
**Author:** ![JRDelirious](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jrdelirious/32/9531_2.png) [@JRDelirious](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRDelirious)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 2:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/25 "2004-02-11T14:40:27Z")
> [@Bricker](#): > > Siege: > > Brandus is not going to miss having sex with you, either. \*\*\* Brandus is gay\*\*\*. (emphasis mine) People seem to be missing that bit of info (that **Brandus** himself provided), in their red-faced ire. I read the OP as a rant about how he perceives the media as making Gay the flavour-of-the-month that is thrown into the mix to “kick it up a notch” – Which makes it kinda weak because, well, this sooner or later happens to almost every segment of the population and sure many of them will also react with “oh, great, now all my white-bread neighbors/coworkers are going to be asking me if all of us really do/act like that…”. To which the answer is, of course, “it’s just a TV show, they’re playing it up” and I switch to the Discovery Channel. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/26 "2004-02-11T14:55:34Z")
Is watching TV mandatory in America now? ---
**Author:** ![Earthworm\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/f07891/32.png) [@Earthworm\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Earthworm_Jim)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 3:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/27 "2004-02-11T15:02:21Z")
> [@Mangetout](#): > > Is watching TV mandatory in America now? Yes. The FDA recommended daily allowance is 4 hours. ---
**Author:** ![RexDart](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b77776/32.png) [@RexDart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RexDart)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/28 "2004-02-11T15:04:27Z")
> [@Bricker](#): > > Siege: > > Brandus is not going to miss having sex with you, either. Brandus is gay. Yeah, when I posted at #3 I didn’t know that and got really sarcastic, and **Brandus** took care of that in post #7, clearing up the ambiguity. I considered posting a “D’oh, sorry for the misunderstanding” post. What puzzles me are the posters who posted _after_ his bit of extra info yet didn’t seem to have read the entire thread before posting. I know that can be tough with a 4-page thread, but around 25 posts or so it’s not all that unreasonable an expectation. ---
**Author:** ![DeaganTheWolf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/49beb7/32.png) [@DeaganTheWolf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeaganTheWolf)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/29 "2004-02-11T15:26:43Z")
> [@matt\_mcl](#): > > It’s often because “making a show of our gayness” is usually code for “finding it interesting in some way and occasionally talking about it, and behaving as though we had _gasp_ a community and a culture.” > > Or else it’s code for “visibly outside the bounds of socially-approved behaviour, dress, and speech for our gender, which makes others uncomfortable.” > > Or else it’s code for “pig-headedly insisting on having our consensual sexual, social, and gender choices being treated as equally worthy of celebration as those of others, in every picky detail.” > > Or else for “refusing to be quiet like a good’un when it’s perfectly obvious that our discussion of the roots of our oppression and identity are making polite people uncomfortable.” > > Yes, how rude. Or possibly, it could be code for “Those gays who insist on screaming about how gay they are at every oppourtunity, regardless of whether or not they are in accepting or supporting company. That percentage of the community and culture that embarrasses the other majority by their constant whinging about persecution and unacceptace and over compensates for it by behaviour that’s obnoxious by ANY standard.” I don’t see why it’s not acceptable to be a little tired of hearing about Gay rights. For those of us who DO support the cause and don’t give a crap if you’re gay or not, the rhetoric gets boring. We want to know all the facets of your personality, not just the bit that needs to scream “Im here, I’m queer and I’m not gonna dissappear!” all day long. Not every Hetero supporter feels the need to be an activist. If it comes to votes I cast mine in favor of Gay Rights, and that’s as far as i’m interested in it. Why? well I don’t have a personal interest in it. I agree that the OP is whinging about something trivial though. ---
**Author:** ![Genghis\_Bob](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/45deac/32.png) [@Genghis\_Bob](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Genghis_Bob)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/30 "2004-02-11T15:27:47Z")
> [@Brandus](#): > > . . . Media was much more bearable when hettie’s were in charge. Please take it over again. I’ll let you in on a little secret (and I hope my fellow hetero’s don’t find out I’m telling tales out of school): we never gave up control. Contrary to your assertion, the incidence of homosexuality in TV is statistically quite small. We maintain a small sample population of gays in popular entertainment for educational purposes - people who may never have encountered a gay in their life need to know what to look out for. That’s why we keep Jack around, the Queer Eye guys, and that guy on Entertainment Tonight with all the teeth. . . as examples of exemplary gay behavior. (That’s also why Ellen’s sitcoms have tanked – she just refused to act gay enough, so we had to take her out – she was confusing the masses). So, the primary reason we maintain an inventory of gays on TV is so heteros know how to spot 'em. The second reason is so gays will know how to behave. Yep, they’re role models so the Gay population will know how to comport themselves. We can’t have 'em acting all “normal” and everything – next thing you know, they’d just be like everyone else, and then where would we be? ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/31 "2004-02-11T15:28:06Z")
> [@Beelzebubba](#): > > Yes. The FDA recommended daily allowance is 4 hours. First compulsory gun ownership, now this. I told them, this would never have happened if you lot hadn’t made such a fuss over that whole silly ‘independence’ thing. ---
**Author:** ![Spiff](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiff/32/9852_2.png) [@Spiff](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiff)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/32 "2004-02-11T15:39:08Z")
> [@Super Gnat](#): > > Clay Aiken is gay now? Since when? Clay made that lifestyle choice while still in his mama’s womb. ---
**Author:** ![Ilsa\_Lund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/a6a055/32.png) [@Ilsa\_Lund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ilsa_Lund)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 3:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/33 "2004-02-11T15:41:10Z")
> [@Mangetout](#): > > First compulsory gun ownership, now this. > > I told them, this would never have happened if you lot hadn’t made such a fuss over that whole silly ‘independence’ thing. Ahh, you’ve still got your knickers in a twist 'cause we won’t give you your pwecious colonies back… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![FriarTed](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/friarted/32/1052_2.png) [@FriarTed](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FriarTed)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 3:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/34 "2004-02-11T15:49:01Z")
> [@Siege](#): > > You know, I am a big-breasted, straight woman who loves big, burly men who are a bit macho. I even love and understand football, though not quite as much as I enjoy sex (hey, two balls are better than one!). I also don’t understand why women don’t enjoy giving blowjobs. I’m also quite definitely pro-homosexual, if such a position exists. > > **Brandus** , a post like yours makes it clear to me, that, much as I enjoy men, I will never have sex with you. It’s a bit of a shame. You see, I think giving guys multiple orgasms is fun! > > CJ OK, since no other manly man has responded… So Siege, how you doin’? _G_ RE the OP- I’d rather the Heteros & Homos not be in charge of Entertainment anymore- I want the Hebrews back running the shows! ---
**Author:** ![Chastain86](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Chastain86](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chastain86)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/35 "2004-02-11T15:53:23Z")
Every so often, you find an OP that is so preposterous, you can’t help but wonder if you’re being whooshed. :rolleyes: However, I’m going to take a moment to attempt to make some sense of what he’s saying. **Brandus** seems to feel as if Gay is the Hip, New Thing on TV and the media, and you know what? He’s partially correct. Gay IS the hip, new thing for Mass America. However, just because it’s the Hip New Media Thing doesn’t mean it hasn’t been around for a long time – just that media coverage and, with it, Mass America’s acceptance of it has come a long way since, say, the 1950’s. However. Your tone is such that you seem to think it’s acceptable to imply that gay people should get the fark back in the closet and give television back to the breeders. This, my misled chum, is why the people on the SDMB will be calling for your head next to Alfredo Garcia’s. Your words are standing in the way of your point. I think what you want to say is: “Why are there so many shows about gay people, and gay characters on sitcoms, and such? When did every show have to have on gay character in order to be a realistic slice of life?” And the answer to your question is: “Since networks discovered that by adding at least one gay character, they can bring in an entirely new demographic.” I hope that helped. The rest of you may continue with the flame-war you’re so eager to incite. ---
**Author:** ![Super\_Gnat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e274bd/32.png) [@Super\_Gnat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Super_Gnat)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/36 "2004-02-11T16:21:41Z")
> [@Spiff](#): > > Clay made that lifestyle choice while still in his mama’s womb. Actually, I was looking for a cite of some sort. IIRC he has consistently maintained that he is het, and if I’m mistaken then I’d like to know about it. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/37 "2004-02-11T16:22:10Z")
Janet Jackson bared her boob just for you. How much more “het” do you need? 😕😃 ---
**Author:** ![Diane](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/2acd7d/32.png) [@Diane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diane)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/38 "2004-02-11T16:22:16Z")
> [@](#): > > Please read the rules of the Pit. > > Lynn > For the Straight Dope Besides, lawn chairs are sooooo het. It should have been “pushing up a stool”. ---
**Author:** ![Malacandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Malacandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malacandra)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/39 "2004-02-11T16:33:30Z")
> [@Siege](#): > > You know, I am a big-breasted, straight woman who loves big, burly men who are a bit macho. I even love and understand football, though not quite as much as I enjoy sex (hey, two balls are better than one!). I also don’t understand why women don’t enjoy giving blowjobs. \ You see, I think giving guys multiple orgasms is fun! > CJ So… **Siege** , how’re _you_ doing? ---
**Author:** ![Brandus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/898d66/32.png) [@Brandus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brandus)\ **Post date:** [February 11, 2004, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608/40 "2004-02-11T16:41:14Z")
> [@Siege](#): > > much as I enjoy men, I will never have sex with you. It’s a bit of a shame. You see, I think giving guys multiple orgasms is fun! I’m sorry it took me a while to respond, I had to supress my gag reflex. It’s behavior like this why we’re gay in the first place. Women trying to hold dominion over males through sex is the most degrading thing ever in the history of everything. Oh no! She won’t lift up her skirt for me! Must bow to her will! I’d rather be a nullo than by pussy-whipped! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-heteros-please-take-back-america/228608.md?page=3)