# Attention numbskulls! Get edumakated right here, y'all.
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [December 11, 2003, 7:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415 "2003-12-11T19:37:01Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 5
### Author:  [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)
#### Post date: [December 12, 2003, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/81 "2003-12-12T19:45:10Z")
It’s “atheist” and “Israel”, not “athiest” or “Isreal”.
Clinton was not impeached for adultery.
“Christian” is not synonymous either with “fundamentalist” or “creationist”.
Bush won, Gore lost. Get over it.
There is no such thing as free health care. Anywhere in the world.
If he cheated on his first wife with you, he will cheat on you with someone else.
Some ideas are so stupid that only an idiot would believe them. Unfortunately, the world will never run out of idiots.
Regards,
Shodan
---
### Author:  [@l1I235](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/l1I235)
#### Post date: [December 12, 2003, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/82 "2003-12-12T20:26:33Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Shodan \*
> \*\*
> Bush won, Gore lost. Get over it.
> \*\*
Couldn’t agree more. Bush won the electon of 5 to 4 FAIR AND SQUARE.
---
### Author:  [@Neurotik](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Neurotik)
#### Post date: [December 12, 2003, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/83 "2003-12-12T20:37:54Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Lars Aruns \*
> **All right, let’s. “Parmesan” is an erroneous approximation of an Italian word, made up by people who couldn’t bother with the correct pronunciation. Going in the other direction, “Hot dog” stays “hot dog”, it does not become “cane caldo”. Same for “cd”, “film”, and other words. If a word is imported, it is usually not mangled - otherwise, why does pizza stay pizza and doesn’t become pyzz? 🙂**
No, Parmesan is English, parmigiano is Italian. For the same reason that football is futbol in Spanish, baseball is beisbol, roast beef becomes rosbif, etc.
Sometimes, the words are imported unmangled. Sometimes, they are not. But the word is still correct in the new language.
---
### Author:  [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)
#### Post date: [December 12, 2003, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/84 "2003-12-12T21:22:48Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by lieu \*
> It twern’t no vast, right wing conspiracy neither.
I dunno, **lieu,** I don’t think Richard Melon Scaife was spending all those millions on Girl Scout Cookies.
---
### Author:  [@WonTon\_Sean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WonTon_Sean)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2003, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/85 "2003-12-13T01:01:39Z")
1. The South lost the fucking war. It’s over, fellas. I live in Arkansas and I have to put up with the “South will rise again” bullshit all the time. Not to say that all Southerners are like that, however.
2. Slapping a “Type-R”, “NOS” or “Turbo” sticker on your car will _not_ make it go faster.
3. If you sleep everyday in class and do no homework, you will most likely fail. Quit complaining, you stupid fucking shitstick.
4. The United States is not the only country in the world.
---
### Author:  [@Jenaroph](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jenaroph)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2003, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/86 "2003-12-13T01:04:41Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Shodan \*
> \*\*It’s “atheist” and “Israel”, not “athiest” or “Isreal”.
> \*\*
And similarly, it’s “deity”, not “diety.”
Heh. When I see it I half expect to read “I lost 50 pounds with the help of the Lawd Awmighty!”
---
### Author:  [@JeffB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JeffB)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2003, 3:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/87 "2003-12-13T03:33:42Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by r\_k \*
> wishy-washy descriptivism. Well, I apologise if “miniscule” (ugh!) is an acceptable U.S. spelling… I was writing from a British perspective, and no British English dictionaries that I have seen accept this spelling, so British numbskulls have no excuse.
Does the OED count? It has:
> [@](#):
>
> Variant of MINUSCULE a., prob. arising partly from shift of stress from the second to the first syllable, and partly from association with MINIATURE a., MINIMUM a., etc.
I prefer _minuscule_, but _miniscule_ is coming on strong.
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Neurotik \*
>
> > [@](#):
> >
> > \*Originally posted by Lars Aruns \*
> > All right, let’s. “Parmesan” is an erroneous approximation of an Italian word, made up by people who couldn’t bother with the correct pronunciation. Going in the other direction, “Hot dog” stays “hot dog”, it does not become “cane caldo”. Same for “cd”, “film”, and other words. If a word is imported, it is usually not mangled - otherwise, why does pizza stay pizza and doesn’t become pyzz?
>
> No, Parmesan is English, parmigiano is Italian. For the same reason that football is futbol in Spanish, baseball is beisbol, roast beef becomes rosbif, etc.
>
> Sometimes, the words are imported unmangled. Sometimes, they are not. But the word is still correct in the new language.
Have to agree with **Neurotik** – _Parmesan_ has been in the English language back to the 1500s.
---
### Author:  [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2003, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/88 "2003-12-13T04:26:17Z")
Yup. If you’re refusing to say Parmesan, you’d better be saying Firenze, Venezia, Genova, Roma, Sicilia, and Sardegna.
---
### Author:  [@Chanteuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chanteuse)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2003, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/89 "2003-12-13T04:52:08Z")
1. There is no such frozen dessert as sherbe **r** t. It is sherBET, **B-E-T**.
2. People who deal in real estate are re-AL-tors, not re-LA-tors.
3. Necklaces, bracelets, and earrings are jew-EL-ry, not jew-LA-ry.
4. No one has periphreal vision–they have peripheral vision.
5. Alot is not a word, any more than abunch would be. A lot–TWO words!
6. You put clothes in a chest of drawers, not a chester drawers.
---
### Author:  [@ratty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ratty)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2003, 5:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/90 "2003-12-13T05:33:12Z")
-It is a chaise longue, not a chaise lounge.
-“Red touch black, venom lack” is only true east of the Mississippi River and north of Mexico.
-Cats do not always land on their feet.
-Bacteria is plural. The singular form is bacterium.
-Bats are not blind.
-The correct plurals of words such as brother-in-law, surgeon general and court martial are formed by pluralizing the noun only:
brothers-in-law, surgeons general, courts martial.
-The word fuck is not an acronym of any kind.
-Typing in all caps, in different colors or sizes, or repeating exclamation or question marks does not make what you are typing any more important, interesting, or true.
-There is no such thing as race, save as a somewhat archaic synonym for species. There is a human race, period.
-Coloring the edge of a CD with a green marker will not improve sound quality.
-Putting butter on a burn will not help it to heal faster, and may actually cause an infection.
-You cannot treat a viral infection with antibiotics.
-You cannot prove a negative.
-You cannot lose weight by rubbing some sort of cream or ointment on your body.
-No magnetic bracelet is going to cure your health problems.
-Neither is colored water, breathing deeply, or grass clippings in compressed pill form.
-Sharks do, in fact, get cancer.
-Africa is a continent, with many different countries, cultures, religions, and languages.
-Large carnivores such as tigers, lions, bears, etc. do not make safe pets. Ever.
-The young people that are pissing you off today with their bad manners, loud music, shocking lack of moral values, and poor fashion sense will one day be people your age who are in their turn pissed off by another generation of young people with bad manners, loud music, a shocking lack of moral values, and poor fashion sense. Just wait.
-We are all going to die sooner or later. There is no magic pill, no exercise regimen, no special diet, and no breakthrough surgery that will prevent this.
---
### Author:  [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2003, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/91 "2003-12-13T05:52:19Z")
Inuit are not Indians. Inuit is a plural. The singular is Inuk.
---
### Author:  [@I\_can\_t\_believe\_that\_s\_butter](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/I_can_t_believe_that_s_butter)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2003, 6:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/92 "2003-12-13T06:08:11Z")
Well, since I have “miniscule”, I thought I’d give ol’ **r\_k** another example instead: enthusiasticness. Yes, I said this word just now in conversation. I had no idea why it felt wrong at the time, but when I was prompted to say “enthusiasm” by a friend, I was promptly disturbed and hoped that my state of alertness from having just woken up was wholly to blame.
---
### Author:  [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2003, 6:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/93 "2003-12-13T06:16:03Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Mariemarie \*
> \*\*34. Garcon means boy. \*\*
Actually, the word is “Garçon”, you ignorant peasant.
I fart in your general direction.
1. (if anyone is still keeping track) Quoting Monty Python is not a mark of wit.
---
### Author:  [@Super\_Gnat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Super_Gnat)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2003, 6:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/94 "2003-12-13T06:41:47Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Mayflower \*
> **3. Necklaces, bracelets, and earrings are jew-EL-ry, not jew-LA-ry.**
Everyone I know pronounces it with two syllables: JEWL-ry. We pronounce “jewel” like “joule” (or “jewl”), so there’s a consistency there. What’s your take on that?
---
### Author:  [@Astra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Astra)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2003, 7:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/95 "2003-12-13T07:02:56Z")
Hair and nails do not continue growing after death. The skin pulls back, giving the illusion.
If it is on CSI, it probably has a 0.001% of happening in real life. This includes dead divers in treetops, perfectly conclusive lab results, and most of the well-timed puns.
---
### Author:  [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2003, 7:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/96 "2003-12-13T07:03:19Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Bryan Ekers \*
> \*\*38. (if anyone is still keeping track) Quoting Monty Python is not a mark of wit. \*\*
1. Quoting Margaret Cho, however, is.
---
### Author:  [@Derleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Derleth)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2003, 8:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/97 "2003-12-13T08:03:39Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Dooku \*
> \*\*You’re right. It’s a touchy subject for me and I overreacted. I apologize for the hijack. \*\*
Damn. Now I have to apologize to you. 😃 I’m sorry about the “pissed in your IV” bit and the “penetrate your skull” bit.
I won’t apologize for denegrating Microsoft software, but I will state calmly why I dislike it so much. Just not here.
**matt\_mcl** : Indians are not Indians. Unless they’re Indian Indians. Obviously.
**mademoiselle** : Snobs are one thing. Education is something else. Education doesn’t make snobs of people, nor does lack of formal education make one wise. In my experience, and according to all of the evidence I’ve seen, education is the single best thing a person can do to improve his own chances in the real world, and that having a college diploma is more than just having a piece of paper.
---
### Author:  [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2003, 8:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/98 "2003-12-13T08:16:20Z")
> [@](#):
>
> matt\_mcl: Indians are not Indians. Unless they’re Indian Indians. Obviously.
I know, but if you’re dealing with someone who thinks that Inuit are “Indians,” the preferable terminology is probably gonna be lost on them anyway.
---
### Author:  [@Chanteuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chanteuse)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2003, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/99 "2003-12-13T13:34:23Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Super Gnat \*
> \*\*Everyone I know pronounces it with two syllables: JEWL-ry. We pronounce “jewel” like “joule” (or “jewl”), so there’s a consistency there. What’s your take on that? \*\*
To be honest, this is the way I pronounce it. I just despise when people twist the letters around to mispronounce it and I emphasized the middle syllable in order to highlight the difference! 🙂
---
### Author:  [@Kalimero](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kalimero)
#### Post date: [December 13, 2003, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415/100 "2003-12-13T14:01:19Z")
Ariel Sharon is not doing the same thing Hitler did.
Neither does George Bush.
Socialism does not necessarily mean oppessive dictatorship.
“Modern medicine just treats the symptoms, not the causes of disease” is a statement both stupid and incorrect. If there is no cure then treating the symptoms is a perfectly reasonable strategy.
[Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415.md?page=4)
[Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-numbskulls-get-edumakated-right-here-yall/218415.md?page=6)