# Attention Safeway Shoppers... I have HUGE balls. **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 15, 2002, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521 "2002-09-15T05:52:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Feynn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ecb155/32.png) [@Feynn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feynn)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 5:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/1 "2002-09-15T05:52:10Z")
It has been a very long day, I’ve been on the run since early this morning moving furniture from my father-in-laws house. He passed away in January and we just sold his place so it’s been my job to sort, pack, and move everything here. It would be diifferent if his place was within the city but it’s a 350km round trip. I’m exhausted and everything hurts, especially my knees. Before I could settle down here and relax a little I had to make a quick trip to Safeway for some essentials. Every step I take hurts and by the time I hit the back of the store my knees are killing me. Why does Safeway put the fucking milk and bread at the back of the store anyways?? I was walking down the dairy aisle which is adjacent to the bakery and I ran into an older couple, I would guess they were in their late 50’s. Now, it is not unusual to run into people who are over 50 at 9:30 pm but it is unusual to watch a man berate and belittle his wife/girlfriend in the middle of the bakery. The guy was well over six feet while the woman’s head only came to his shoulder. I didn’t catch all of what he said but he did tell her to put something back that she had picked up and then very loudly said, “What part of put it down don’t you understand?” WTF??? Perhaps because I was tired I must have inadvertently been staring at this guy and I know I was thinking this guy was a grade a fucking dink for treating this woman so. We were only six or seven feet away from each other. So he looks over and down at me (I would only come to his shoulder) and says, “Can I help you?” Without even thinking I said, “Yeah, stop acting like a dink”. I was sure his head was going to literally explode as it turned a very vivid shade of red, he stammered out “What??” to which I replied, “What part of that didn’t you understand?” Then his eyes kinda bugged out as I must have shocked the fuck out of him… he didn’t seem like the kind of person that was used to being talked back to. It’s amazing I can walk with balls this big. I am amazed there wasn’t a brawl between this guy and me between the milk and the bread. For some reason he just turned away and continued on with his shopping. My only hope is that the guy is just a noisy asshole and doesn’t take his frustrations out on this woman because then I’d be the dink for not knowing to shut up. I hope I can be reassured by the fact I saw this couple walking through another part of the store with the guy pushing the cart and the woman snuggled up to him. She did turn once and looked in my direction, she flashed me a furtive smile when “dink-man” was looking at tomatoes. Maybe he was having as long and as crappy a day I’ve had. Maybe he didn’t realize his behaviour was beneath contempt until I pointed it out. I hope he apologized and things will be better between these two people. Well, that’s it. I’m off to bed as I have to hit the road again in five hours to finish up the packing and moving. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 5:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/2 "2002-09-15T05:55:53Z")
**applause** ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 5:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/3 "2002-09-15T05:59:33Z")
Why did I think your post was going to be about some sort of injury you had incurred after having an altercation with a shopping trolley?? 😃 But Very Well Done Sir!! Your balls are heroes mate, HEROES. ---
**Author:** ![Juniper200](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df788c/32.png) [@Juniper200](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Juniper200)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 6:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/4 "2002-09-15T06:35:28Z")
My goodness, you must need specially tailored trousers to house testicles of that magnitude! Good show! ---
**Author:** ![JRT](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/3e96dc/32.png) [@JRT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JRT)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 10:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/5 "2002-09-15T10:30:16Z")
You must use a wheelbarrow for those suckers! Good job. ---
**Author:** ![Siege](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dbc845/32.png) [@Siege](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siege)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 11:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/6 "2002-09-15T11:16:57Z")
Nice to know we still have heroes among us. ---
**Author:** ![Elenfair](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/cc9497/32.png) [@Elenfair](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elenfair)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/7 "2002-09-15T13:04:46Z")
Good for you, Feynn. 😃 It’s good to see that some people will stand up for what they believe in. You’re right, it’s fairly rare that you’ll see that kind of behavior openly displayed in a _grocery store_ of all places. This chap had probably never had anyone snap back at them. E. ---
**Author:** ![Alexxandra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/278dde/32.png) [@Alexxandra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alexxandra)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/8 "2002-09-15T13:15:36Z")
I work at Safeway, and it’s NOT rare to see this kind of behavior. Or to see a physical or verbal fight between customers in the lineup. (two women were fighting in my line last night.) And Feynn…good for you and your huge cohones! ---
**Author:** ![Myrr21](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e495f1/32.png) [@Myrr21](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Myrr21)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/9 "2002-09-15T14:45:25Z")
> [@](#): > > Why did I think your post was going to be about some sort of injury you had incurred after having an altercation with a shopping trolley?? You know, I’ve done that; it sucks. Here I am, doubled over against a bread rack in horrible screaming agony, and all my friends can do is laugh at me while the cart rolls off into the frozen foods section. Never mess with shopping carts. ---
**Author:** ![Una\_Persson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/una_persson/32/346_2.png) [@Una\_Persson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Una_Persson)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/10 "2002-09-15T14:55:00Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Feynn \* > **It’s amazing I can walk with balls this big. I am amazed there wasn’t a brawl between this guy and me between the milk and the bread. For some reason he just turned away and continued on with his shopping.** But a lot of bullies are like that - as soon as someone stands up to them and shows they are unafraid, they fold like a cheap dress. And then, of course, there is that 10% who beat you until you are senseless and gang-rape you anyways. Yee haw. > [@](#): > > **My only hope is that the guy is just a noisy asshole and doesn’t take his frustrations out on this woman because then I’d be the dink for not knowing to shut up. I hope I can be reassured by the fact I saw this couple walking through another part of the store with the guy pushing the cart and the woman snuggled up to him. She did turn once and looked in my direction, she flashed me a furtive smile when “dink-man” was looking at tomatoes.** It’s always a very hard decision to know whether speaking up will cause more trouble. I don’t know if anyone can predict that. That having been said, I will always tend to speak up rather than not, and I applaud your doing so. ---
**Author:** ![elshatan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/41988e/32.png) [@elshatan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elshatan)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 3:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/11 "2002-09-15T15:19:21Z")
Ahh, friends. There to laugh at you when you get hit in the nuts, and there to never, ever let you live it down. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/12 "2002-09-15T16:20:15Z")
He’ll take it out on her, you know. When you’re not there. ---
**Author:** ![elucidator](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/8edcca/32.png) [@elucidator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elucidator)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 4:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/13 "2002-09-15T16:22:34Z")
Oh, and they put the bread and milk in the back 'cause _everybody_ buys bread and milk and this way you have to walk past all the other temptations to get there. How many people go to the store with a list and come back with precisely what they went to get. ---
**Author:** ![MrPeabody](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7cd45c/32.png) [@MrPeabody](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MrPeabody)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/14 "2002-09-15T17:08:26Z")
I some times embarrass my daughter. She asked me why I sometimes feel the need to act when I witness hugely egregious behavior. I simply said “sometimes you have to let a person know that what they are doing is stupid. If you don’t they can do it forever with impunity. But once you call them on it they always think twice”. ---
**Author:** ![capacitor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e47774/32.png) [@capacitor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/capacitor)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/15 "2002-09-15T19:24:33Z")
Wish I can do that where I go. But where I am, saying what Feynn just did is a prelude to a shooting. ---
**Author:** ![Mercury](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e95f7d/32.png) [@Mercury](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mercury)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 7:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/16 "2002-09-15T19:58:56Z")
Dead cool. I hope he realised that what he was doing was really wrong. -M ---
**Author:** ![GrizzRich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7ba0ec/32.png) [@GrizzRich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrizzRich)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/17 "2002-09-15T20:21:18Z")
\<6’4", 350#, 22"neck, 24"biceps speaking up here\> “I got yer back, Feynn.” ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/18 "2002-09-15T21:37:27Z")
Feynn, do you have “Official NBA” stencilled on those enormous 'nads? You must tear in inseams on your jeans. ---
**Author:** ![pesch](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pesch/32/4925_2.png) [@pesch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pesch)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 9:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/19 "2002-09-15T21:40:55Z")
Bart? Nice work, man. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2002, 9:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521/20 "2002-09-15T21:56:46Z")
Very nice, **Feynn**. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attention-safeway-shoppers-i-have-huge-balls/128521.md?page=2)