# Attn: Hiring Penis Police! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 22, 2000, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attn-hiring-penis-police/13088 "2000-01-22T17:46:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2000, 4:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attn-hiring-penis-police/13088/41 "2000-01-23T16:57:00Z")
Just trying to work in “Assault with a friendly weapon” here… ---
**Author:** ![techchick68](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea5d25/32.png) [@techchick68](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/techchick68)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2000, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attn-hiring-penis-police/13088/42 "2000-01-23T19:24:00Z")
Gawd you people are funny! My ribs hurt from laughing! Last night I woulda been busted for indecent exposure in the front seat of one of my best male friend’s 99 Corvette… And to think I was the one that posted the absurd law, just think what would have happened had we got caught! 😃 ROFLMFAO ---
**Author:** ![techchick68](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ea5d25/32.png) [@techchick68](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/techchick68)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2000, 7:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attn-hiring-penis-police/13088/43 "2000-01-23T19:26:00Z")
course, there is no back seat in a Vette \< duh \> \< grin \> ---
**Author:** ![Surgoshan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@Surgoshan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Surgoshan)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2000, 7:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attn-hiring-penis-police/13088/44 "2000-01-23T19:31:00Z")
This law is a PERVERSION of the PENILE system! Cold dead hand. Giggle. * * * I sold my soul to Satan for a dollar. I got it in the mail. ---
**Author:** ![system](https://global.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/original/2X/e/e489c3b7d8fce19c4b355dd4fc3f88cc39c34b87.png) [@system](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/system)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2000, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attn-hiring-penis-police/13088/45 "2000-01-23T22:06:00Z")
Gee, I – I certainly hope the judges in such cases won’t be _hard on_ the first offenders . . . Ohhehehehehehehehehehehehehehehehe . . . whew, that’s some _guuuuudddd_ shit! 🆒 * * * If you knew what **I** know, everything would make sense; and if it didn’t, you’d know enough to know not to worry about it – _ **The God of Somebody Else** _ ---
**Author:** ![labradorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3ec8ea/32.png) [@labradorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/labradorian)\ **Post date:** [January 23, 2000, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attn-hiring-penis-police/13088/46 "2000-01-23T22:50:00Z")
Will defense attorneys be able to argue that the evidence is purely circumcisional? * * * **Dee da dee da dee dee do do / Dee ba ditty doh / Deedle dooby doo ba dee um bee ooby / Be doodle oodle doodle dee doh** [http://members.xoom.com/labradorian/](http://members.xoom.com/labradorian/) ---
**Author:** ![Sassy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e47c2d/32.png) [@Sassy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sassy)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attn-hiring-penis-police/13088/47 "2000-01-25T01:03:00Z")
:::bump::: you should excuse the expression ---
**Author:** ![John\_Corrado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a88e4f/32.png) [@John\_Corrado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Corrado)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attn-hiring-penis-police/13088/48 "2000-01-25T01:11:00Z")
Little Nemo said: > [@](#): > > I say we should steal some NRA slogans. “My erection has killed less people than Ted Kennedy’s car.” “Erections don’t arouse people. People arouse people.” * * * JMCJ Just confirming that my ass is, in fact, the wisest part of my body. ---
**Author:** ![labradorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3ec8ea/32.png) [@labradorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/labradorian)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attn-hiring-penis-police/13088/49 "2000-01-25T01:57:00Z")
“Keep your laws off my erection.” * * * **Dee da dee da dee dee do do / Dee ba ditty doh / Deedle dooby doo ba dee um bee ooby / Be doodle oodle doodle dee doh** [http://members.xoom.com/labradorian/](http://members.xoom.com/labradorian/) ---
**Author:** ![Bricker](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/977dab/32.png) [@Bricker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bricker)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attn-hiring-penis-police/13088/50 "2000-01-25T04:52:00Z")
That had _better_ be a gun in your pocket! (Leno, not me). ---
**Author:** ![UncleBeer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/977dab/32.png) [@UncleBeer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/UncleBeer)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 1:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attn-hiring-penis-police/13088/51 "2000-01-25T13:29:00Z")
> [@](#): > > **Priapus** , the god of procreation Now there’s a nifty screen name. Almost makes me want to relinquish UncleBeer. ---
**Author:** ![TwistofFate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/cdc98d/32.png) [@TwistofFate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TwistofFate)\ **Post date:** [January 25, 2000, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attn-hiring-penis-police/13088/52 "2000-01-25T13:37:00Z")
Sounds like those arrested would be doing “hard” time… I am very sorry for the abysmal pun * * * John Larrigan “82.35% of all statistics are made up on the spot”–Vic Reeves ---
**Author:** ![jab1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ee7513/32.png) [@jab1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jab1)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2000, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attn-hiring-penis-police/13088/53 "2000-01-26T01:27:00Z")
It’s obvious from the link provided by **tiny cow** that it’s just a way to get strip joints banned. In Central Florida, when Seminole County, north of Orlando, decided to get rid of strip joints, they simply said it was illegal for adults to be naked in public places other than doctors’ offices and changing rooms in clothing stores. (I’m sure there are other exceptions to this law. I’m not trying to be exhaustive here.) All the strip joints in Casselberry, FL, saw their business go limp. (And that’s the last pun I’m gonna make on this thread!) My prediction: This Mississippi law will eventually be found un-Constitutional. And I bet the ol’ politician who wrote it knew that going in. He’s just trying to get attention, but I think it’s gonna backfire. People are gonna think he’s an idiot wasting his time. * * * \>\< DARWIN \> \_\_ **L\_\_\_L** ---
**Author:** ![Spud](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spud/32/347_2.png) [@Spud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spud)\ **Post date:** [January 26, 2000, 2:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attn-hiring-penis-police/13088/54 "2000-01-26T02:20:00Z")
Thanks to a poster on the snopes board, here is the Indiana law: -IC 35-45-4 Chapter 4. Indecent Acts and Prostitution IC 35-45-4-1 Sec. 1. (a) A person who knowingly or intentionally, in a public place: (1) engages in sexual intercourse; (2) engages in deviate sexual conduct; (3) appears in a state of nudity; or (4) fondles the person’s genitals or the genitals of another person; commits public indecency, a Class A misdemeanor. However, the offense is a Class D felony if the person commits the offense by appearing in the state of nudity with the intent to arouse the sexual desires of the person or another person in or on a public place where a child less than sixteen (16) years of age is present. (b) “Nudity” means the showing of the human male or female genitals, pubic area, or buttocks with less than a fully opaque covering, the showing of the female breast with less than a fully opaque covering of any part of the nipple, or the showing of covered male genitals in a discernibly turgid state. Don’t know how long it has been on the books, but I can say that there has not been a rash of arrests in the Junior High Schools here that I’m aware of. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/attn-hiring-penis-police/13088.md?page=2)