# August August minirants! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [August 1, 2012, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068 "2012-08-01T16:21:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 7
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2012, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/121 "2012-08-06T14:59:47Z")
> [@flatlined](#): > > **aruvqan** , what are sealegs? [Surimi](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Surimi), fakeish seafood based on blending actual crab or lobster with whitefish and starch. A reasonable substitute if you are making something like seafood salad or crab rangoon. Or adding to alfredo sauce. ---
**Author:** ![aruvqan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aruvqan/32/2891_2.png) [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2012, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/122 "2012-08-06T15:04:07Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Or, you could hire yourself out as a passenger to truckers who want to use the HOV lane. They get to drive the carpool lane while you sleep, back and forth along the interstate. > > Win-win! Nice idea but I have trained myself not to sleep in moving vehicles … a good precaution when you do lots of late night driving. Hence the pulling over to nap. [actually back when I was young and stupid I used to drive to the other work locations instead of fly so I had my own car, and I did more cross country trips where I would drive until I got sleepy then pull over and nap for an hour or so, then drive again. I could solo across country in 5 days without stopping at a hotel, saving my per diem =)] ---
**Author:** ![eenerms](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/cdc98d/32.png) [@eenerms](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eenerms)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2012, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/123 "2012-08-06T15:33:19Z")
> [@laina\_f](#): > > Abreva is a miracle drug for cold sores. It’s expensive, but you only need a little and can save the rest. I keep a tube in my purse. If I apply it as soon as I sense a cold sore coming on, it prevents the sore from opening. It will definitely make your massive canker heal more quickly. Thanks for this, but it isn’t a cold sore it’s on the inside of my lip, where I bit it. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2012, 3:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/124 "2012-08-06T15:59:53Z")
Ouch! ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2012, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/125 "2012-08-06T16:23:57Z")
> [@flatlined](#): > > . . . Bill doesn’t get it. He says that because he is used to handling heavy equipment, he should be able to control a bike. I say that we should get married now so that his obit with have a line about the greaving widow flipping the casket off and shouting I TOLD YOU SO, YOU FUCKING IDIOT!!!" Oh, dear. That will not cross over well. Do you know anyone who both rides a motorcycle and works with heavy equipment? They’d be able to say with authority that the two are not the same. And even if his experience does change the shape of his learning curve, the curve is still there. Do not discount the curve. ---
**Author:** ![Kimballkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5a626/32.png) [@Kimballkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimballkid)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2012, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/126 "2012-08-06T16:28:53Z")
> [@flatlined](#): > > my rant: I think I’m going to be a widow before I’m a bride. Bill is talking about buying a Harley. Of course, he’s not content with something small and nimble like mine, he’s looking at [800 lb UltraGlides](http://www.harley-davidson.com/en_US/Content/Pages/2010_Motorcycles/2010_motorcycles.html#/home/NB). > > The man has never owned a motorcycle before. I’d never owned a motorcycle or even a scooter before a couple of months ago when I bought a little 50cc scooter to tool around town with. I was kind of surprised at how heavy that little thing is, I can’t imagine trying to finagle around an 800 pounder. Especially if you put a passenger on with you. ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2012, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/127 "2012-08-06T16:32:54Z")
Here’s my mini-rant of the day: apparently my state bar association doesn’t recommend lawyers in my county! What! ---
**Author:** ![SnakesCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4af34b/32.png) [@SnakesCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SnakesCatLady)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2012, 4:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/128 "2012-08-06T16:42:42Z")
Ok, it’s Monday and I have had my quota of “ewwwwwww” for the entire week, if not the month. I went to complete my payment for my hockey season ticket. In a cheerful mood I got home to discover Chernobyl, the outside cat who really belongs to a lady down the street, had left a gift on the door mat. A rat. Or rather, pieces of a rat. The little ratty head carefully placed where the head would go if the front third of the rat wasn’t missing - next to the back two thirds of the rat. It’s still there. Mr SCL can deal with it when he wakes up. I will hurl if I have to touch it. ---
**Author:** ![Kimballkid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/b5a626/32.png) [@Kimballkid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kimballkid)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2012, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/129 "2012-08-06T16:45:38Z")
> [@aruvqan](#): > > As I drove into the rest area, I saw the sign about idling and illegal. So what is there? A full up parking lot for trucks with every damned one idling. They even make it illegal for semis to idle? That seems strange. ---
**Author:** ![Cinnamon\_Imp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/58956e/32.png) [@Cinnamon\_Imp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cinnamon_Imp)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2012, 6:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/130 "2012-08-06T18:07:21Z")
> [@kaylasdad99](#): > > Could be. Our pregnancy wasn’t a multiple, but the first order of business when we got to the OB/GYN was to have **kaylasmom** ’s IUD removed. > > Well, second, actually. First was for her to pee on a stick that hadn’t been purchased the previous Friday night at Rite-Aid. Hmm, they took my word for it on the Superdrug™ and local mini-market cheapo tests, but the scan showed that any occupant has since vacated the premises. Ah well, at least I know now! Although I’m wishing for once I hadn’t been prompt and taken the first test, if I’d left it another 4 days I’d have just assumed it was a late weird period, and saved various people a lot of stress ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2012, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/131 "2012-08-06T18:12:36Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > Looks like the Temple Shooting is Domestic Terrorism. Sadly, this board will only see another “every motherfucking thread devolves into Gun Control” week. Yesterday’s horrible event sure didn’t take long to go there. I get so damned tired of that ongoing argument here. > [@eenerms](#): > > Thanks for this, but it isn’t a cold sore it’s on the inside of my lip, where I bit it. There’s something you can get for canker sores, too - I was looking for something else, but I found this - [a cover for canker sore,](http://www.cankercover.com/) which seems like it would work (they are awfully irritating - you can’t keep your tongue out of them, everything you eat bothers them, etc.). > [@Kimballkid](#): > > They even make it illegal for semis to idle? That seems strange. I understand that semi trucks have different idling requirements, but the vehicles I see idling are never semi trucks. ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2012, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/132 "2012-08-06T19:54:04Z")
> [@flatlined](#): > > Bill needs to start small and slow, like most surviving bikers did. Bikes have the controls in different places. The clutch is controlled by the left hand, instead of the left foot. Brakes are controlled differently, front is right hand, back is right foot. Trying to do all of this on an unfamiliar machine while going 80 mph just doesn’t work out well. > > I think Bill needs to get a [scooter](http://www.bing.com/shopping/trike-scooter-moped/p/CD06FE1B168A75135003?q=moped&lpf=0&lpq=moped&FORM=CMSMEE) and put around my neighborhood for a while. > > Bill doesn’t get it. He says that because he is used to handling heavy equipment, he should be able to control a bike. I say that we should get married now so that his obit with have a line about the greaving widow flipping the casket off and shouting I TOLD YOU SO, YOU FUCKING IDIOT!!!" Threaten to put a padlock on his fork until he takes an approved [Motorcycle Training Course](http://www.motorcyclerentalshouston.com/). And then do it. Note that the link is for a class in Houston so no excuses. Classes every weekend. ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2012, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/133 "2012-08-06T20:03:48Z")
> [@Projammer](#): > > Threaten to put a padlock on his fork until he takes an approved [Motorcycle Training Course](http://www.motorcyclerentalshouston.com/). And then do it. > > Note that the link is for a class in Houston so no excuses. Classes every weekend. Not only that, but the web site says an approved course is mandatory before you can get a motorcycle license. Bill pays attention to that sort of thing, right? ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2012, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/134 "2012-08-06T20:22:51Z")
He damn well better! ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2012, 8:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/135 "2012-08-06T20:37:24Z")
Too late for an ETA, but if threatening to padlock the fork or front rotor isn’t sufficient, you might ponder aloud the possibility of making the padlock a Prince Albert. :eek: ---
**Author:** ![StarvingButStrong](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/starvingbutstrong/32/335_2.png) [@StarvingButStrong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StarvingButStrong)\ **Post date:** [August 6, 2012, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/136 "2012-08-06T21:37:04Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > Here’s my mini-rant of the day: apparently my state bar association doesn’t recommend lawyers in my county! What! Maybe all the lawyers in your county are crooked. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2012, 12:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/137 "2012-08-07T00:56:28Z")
NOooooooOOOOOooooOOOOOOO! Debby Boone is doing commercials on TV! And they’re playing THAT SONG again. Make it stop! Please make it stop! Makeitstopmakeitstopmakeitstopmakeitstop. \ I got so fucking. _sick_. of. that. song. It was all anyone ever wanted to sing in middle school chorus (until it was Evergreen). Makeitstopmakeitstopmakeittop. \ ---
**Author:** ![Dr.Girlfriend](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dr.girlfriend/32/193_2.png) [@Dr.Girlfriend](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dr.Girlfriend)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2012, 1:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/138 "2012-08-07T01:12:01Z")
> [@flatlined](#): > > I’m so fucking ticked off by this that I’m going to go mop my floor. Maybe I’ll wash the mini blinds as well. All of the kittehs run off and hide because when mom runs out of things to wash, she looks at them… If you run out of things to clean you can always come over here and help me out. I don’t want your kittehs to freak out! And I have chocolate… 🙂 Not really a rant, just the goofiness of my boyfriend. He got to work this morning only to discover that he had forgotten that he’s working 2nd shift this week. So he goes back home for a while. Then when he gets to work at the proper time he realizes he forgot his lunch. I just got back from delivering a sandwich to him, he’s the only one in his department during 2nd shift and he can’t leave the phone bank. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2012, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/139 "2012-08-07T02:28:37Z")
> [@Morgyn](#): > > \ At least you don’t have to worry about Warren Zevon shilling for “Ronco’s Songwriting Gold of the 80s”. I’ve seen John Sebastian (Lovin’ Spoonful), Beckley and Bunnell (America), Neal Sedaka, Mickey Gilley, and even Smokey Robinson hawking those “20 CD, Cassette or 8-Track” sets of oldies. Always teamed up with someone half their age (and intelligence). And the ads go on and on, filling a whole half hour on one topic. WHY? Is there ANYone who says “Naaah… don’t need to hear ‘American Pie’ again” who then does a 180 and decides to call the 800 number after the 29th minute of hearing snippets of Don McLean (and Jim Croce, and Leo Sayer…and Debby Boone)? ---
**Author:** ![Morgyn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morgyn/32/3041_2.png) [@Morgyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morgyn)\ **Post date:** [August 7, 2012, 3:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068/140 "2012-08-07T03:31:00Z")
> [@digs](#): > > At least you don’t have to worry about Warren Zevon shilling for “Ronco’s Songwriting Gold of the 80s”. > > I’ve seen John Sebastian (Lovin’ Spoonful), Beckley and Bunnell (America), Neal Sedaka, Mickey Gilley, and even Smokey Robinson hawking those “20 CD, Cassette or 8-Track” sets of oldies. Always teamed up with someone half their age (and intelligence). > > And the ads go on and on, filling a whole half hour on one topic. WHY? Is there ANYone who says “Naaah… don’t need to hear ‘American Pie’ again” who then does a 180 and decides to call the 800 number after the 29th minute of hearing snippets of Don McLean (and Jim Croce, and Leo Sayer…and Debby Boone)? \ OK, I’ll cop to it. I’ve bought a couple of those collections (Razor & Tie: Totally 80s and Awesome 80s). What can I say, I enjoy (almost all) the songs they listed and didn’t have the cash or inclination to purchase all the albums those songs were released on. Thankfully, Debby Boooooooone was never on the infomercials I saw, nor is her music. \ Does anyone remember when daddy Pat tried to do heavy metal and started wandering around in a leather jacket with chains? There was a sight needing brain bleach! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068.md?page=6) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/august-august-minirants/630068.md?page=8)