# Aussie's crack me up! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 12, 2007, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aussies-crack-me-up/391917 "2007-02-12T20:30:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 4\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![elbows](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/b3f665/32.png) [@elbows](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elbows)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2007, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aussies-crack-me-up/391917/1 "2007-02-12T20:30:08Z")
Global Terror Levels As many are aware, the French government recently announced a raise in its terror alert level from “Run” to “Hide”. The normal level is “General Arrogance”, and the only two higher levels in France are “Surrender” and “Collaborate”. The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France’s white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country’s military capability. ---
**Author:** ![GreedySmurf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/a698b9/32.png) [@GreedySmurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GreedySmurf)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2007, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aussies-crack-me-up/391917/2 "2007-02-12T22:52:53Z")
[QUOTE=elbows] Global Terror Levels The Australians thought about doing something but have decided that their security level of “She’ll be right mate” is enough ! 😃 [/QUOTE] 😃 Australia’s attempt at Terrorism awareness shortly after 9/11 was a campaign led by a then high profile TV breakfast show host. The catchphrase was **Be alert not alarmed**. And everyone in the country was mailed an information package including a fridge magnet with the number to dial if you saw something suspicous. It was widely met with a ‘meh’ from the population and the catchphrase was the subject of much piss-taking for months after. ---
**Author:** ![Oakminster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/77aa72/32.png) [@Oakminster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oakminster)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2007, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aussies-crack-me-up/391917/3 "2007-02-12T23:05:19Z")
[QUOTE=elbows] Global Terror Levels As many are aware, the French government recently announced a raise in its terror alert level from “Run” to “Hide”. The normal level is “General Arrogance”, and the only two higher levels in France are “Surrender” and “Collaborate”. The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France’s white flag factory, effectively paralysing the country’s military capability. It’s not only the French who are on a heightened level of alert: Italy has increased the alert level from “Shout loudly and excitedly” to “Elaborate military posturing”. Two more levels remain, “Ineffective combat operations” and “Change sides”. The Germans also increased their alert state from “Disdain” to “Dress in uniform and sing marching songs”. They have two higher levels: “Invade a neighbour” and “Lose”. Seeing this reaction in continental Europe the Americans have gone from “Isolationism” to “Find another oil-rich nation for regime change”. Their remaining higher alert states are “Attack random countries (ideally those without any credible military)” and “Beg the British for help”. The British are also feeling the pinch in relation to recent bombings and have raised their security level from “Miffed” to “Peeved”. Soon though, security levels may be raised yet again to “Irritated” or even “A Bit Cross”. Londoners have not been “A Bit Cross” since the Blitz in 1940 when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from “Tiresome” to “Bloody Nuisance”. The last time the British issued a “Bloody Nuisance” warning level was during the Great Fire of 1666. The Australians thought about doing something but have decided that their security level of “She’ll be right mate” is enough ! 😃 [/QUOTE] Nice cut & paste without attribution. [http://humour.200ok.com.au/global\_terror\_levels.html](http://humour.200ok.com.au/global_terror_levels.html) ---
**Author:** ![SkipMagic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skipmagic/32/20706_2.png) [@SkipMagic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SkipMagic)\ **Post date:** [February 12, 2007, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/aussies-crack-me-up/391917/4 "2007-02-12T23:16:32Z")
**elbows** , please do not post copyrighted material, or other writings without an attribution to your source. We don’t want to violate copyrights, or have people misidentify the author. With the OP being cut off at the knees (despite **Oakminster** ’s link), there’s not much left to this thread, so I’m gonna close it.