# Autistic child has birthday party, nobody comes, police department saves the day **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 14, 2016, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553 "2016-10-14T21:04:03Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/21 "2016-10-18T01:04:46Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > I swear, I hear at least one of these stories a week. I’m starting to think that some parents (OK, mothers) of kids with autism, or other special needs, are setting this up so they can get a free party and a gift grab for their kid, and some sympathetic TV coverage too. And it’s always the police who show up, and often pay for the parties out of their own pockets. The latest one from my area involved renting an entire paintball facility for the child, his family, and the police and their families. " Hello and thank you for calling. You have reached the office of the New York City Police Department’s Autism Spectrum Party Unit. , or ASPU. All of our ASPU Reservations Officers are currently assisting other deserving parents. If your ASPU request involves a birthday party, please press #1. If your ASPU request involves a Christening or Baptism, please press #2. For a Bris, Bar Mitzvah or just a nice afternoon with some kreplach and stollen, press #3. For an elementary school party, please press #4. For a middle school party, you’re on your own. Those kids are lunatics. For a high school party, please press #5. To coordinate your ASPU party with city-wide press coverage, please have a major credit card or PayPal account information available. ``` APSU: Our motto is " You've Tried The Rest, Now Buy The Best. " ``` 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Cartooniverse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cartooniverse/32/3084_2.png) [@Cartooniverse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cartooniverse)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/22 "2016-10-18T01:16:43Z")
> [@Helena330](#): > > The school needs to be doing a lot more for that kid. My boyfriend’s grandson is severely autistic (he’s also brilliant) and not social, but the school has done a wonderful job of mainstreaming him. He’s not bullied, the other kids include him in activities and they show up at his birthday parties. Good thing I slipped on my [Nomex™ Suit](http://2.imimg.com/data2/DW/PN/MY-1018603/fire-proximity-suit-250x250.jpg) before posting up there. 🙂 **Helena330** ’s post rings beautifully true. Find me a school that makes an effort. Where the admin, staff and students are at least marginally on board with the idea that EVERY single person in the building is a human of value, deserving of respect. Found that school? I’d be stunned to find a marginalized or ostracized child in that school. It doesn’t take a village to raise a child, IMHO. But it sure as hell takes a community. That’s defined, where I come from, as the fellow children and adults that any child comes into contact with in their daily existence. Finding the right methods of slowly turning a community towards a more embracing mindset is the stuff of a life’s work for many parents. Not just of kids on the spectrum. But for many parents. See, from what I have witnessed in my life, it’s not the parents who run to social media and try to create a storm of attention who deserve the attention. It’s the countless families that work hard every day in complete anonymity, making their child know she/ he is beloved. That’s the gift. Not a paintball party. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/23 "2016-10-18T01:41:27Z")
> [@Cartooniverse](#): > > " Hello and thank you for calling. You have reached the office of the New York City Police Department’s Autism Spectrum Party Unit. , or ASPU. All of our ASPU Reservations Officers are currently assisting other deserving parents. > > If your ASPU request involves a birthday party, please press #1. > If your ASPU request involves a Christening or Baptism, please press #2. > For a Bris, Bar Mitzvah or just a nice afternoon with some kreplach and stollen, press #3. > For an elementary school party, please press #4. > For a middle school party, you’re on your own. Those kids are lunatics. > For a high school party, please press #5. > > To coordinate your ASPU party with city-wide press coverage, please have a major credit card or PayPal account information available. > > ``` > APSU: Our motto is " You've Tried The Rest, Now Buy The Best. " > > ``` > > 😃 😛 I don’t think autism is diagnosable at 8 days of age; maybe people are staying away from the bris because of the baby’s autistic sibling(s)? :o ---
**Author:** ![China\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/779978/32.png) [@China\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/China_Guy)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/24 "2016-10-18T03:59:36Z")
> [@Cartooniverse](#): > > **Helena330** ’s post rings beautifully true. Find me a school that makes an effort. Where the admin, staff and students are at least marginally on board with the idea that EVERY single person in the building is a human of value, deserving of respect. Found that school? I’d be stunned to find a marginalized or ostracized child in that school. All three of my daughters go to such a school. It’s wonderful for all of them. And its truly wonderful for my spectrum daughter. PE teacher makes sure she’s included in the less serious group and gets to score a goal. Choir teacher says she’s better than some of the mainstream kids at paying attention and following directions. French teacher says she’s a joy to have in class. Special needs teacher loves having her. The principal asked that we consider our daughter to attend, both for her being with her peers in mainstream classes, and to help her teach diversity and acceptance at the school. \*\*\*Every \*\*\*kid should have such an opportunity and environment ---
**Author:** ![Amateur\_Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/59ef9b/32.png) [@Amateur\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amateur_Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 2:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/25 "2016-10-18T14:22:50Z")
> [@Helena330](#): > > My boyfriend’s grandson is severely autistic (he’s also brilliant) and not social, but the school has done a wonderful job of mainstreaming him. He’s not bullied, the other kids include him in activities and they show up at his birthday parties. Private or public school? Include relevant details. ---
**Author:** ![brainstall](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/35a633/32.png) [@brainstall](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brainstall)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/26 "2016-10-18T14:46:34Z")
I have to wonder about the parents planning big parties every year, and year after year being disappointed when hardly anyone, or no one, shows up. Why get your child stoked that this year is going to be different, then crushed, when it’s not? There has to be a better way to handle birthday parties for kids who don’t have a lot of friends. ---
**Author:** ![Helena330](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/helena330/32/531_2.png) [@Helena330](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Helena330)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/27 "2016-10-18T23:14:24Z")
> [@Amateur\_Barbarian](#): > > Private or public school? Include relevant details. It’s a public elementary school in the Fort Worth, TX area. ---
**Author:** ![jz78817](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jz78817/32/1028_2.png) [@jz78817](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jz78817)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2016, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/28 "2016-10-18T23:47:24Z")
> [@brainstall](#): > > I have to wonder about the parents planning big parties every year, and year after year being disappointed when hardly anyone, or no one, shows up. Why get your child stoked that this year is going to be different, then crushed, when it’s not? I don’t get it at all. for me birthday parties were a family thing, I never once had one where kids I knew (I hesitate to say “friends” anymore) were invited. ---
**Author:** ![Amateur\_Barbarian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/59ef9b/32.png) [@Amateur\_Barbarian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Amateur_Barbarian)\ **Post date:** [October 19, 2016, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/29 "2016-10-19T01:55:17Z")
> [@Helena330](#): > > It’s a public elementary school in the Fort Worth, TX area. Ah. It’s a recent revelation that TX is apparently blessed with a surfeit of qualified and experienced autism providers and specialists. (I wouldn’t have guessed.) ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2017, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/30 "2017-12-02T03:22:26Z")
Tonight’s NBC News ended with one of these “heartwarming” stories, although in this case, it was the fire department. > **[How a fire department saved a 7-year-old’s birthday](https://www.nbcnews.com/nightly-news/video/how-a-fire-department-saved-a-7-year-old-s-birthday-1107974211577)** > > When no one showed up to celebrate the birthday of a boy with autism, the Waycross, Georgia Fire Department threw him a party he’ll never forget. I called BS on it when the dad said he flagged down a fire truck. :o Like they don’t have anything else to do while they’re on duty? And why didn’t they bring their own kids? Anyway, I hadn’t realized this thread was that old. It’s been a while since I’ve seen a story like this, on either my local or national news. ---
**Author:** ![Captain\_Amazing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/6de8d8/32.png) [@Captain\_Amazing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Captain_Amazing)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2017, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/31 "2017-12-02T04:54:32Z")
I don’t understand how this happens? Did people RSVP? Because, if they did, you’d know how many people are coming before you rent the paintball place. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2017, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/32 "2017-12-02T05:01:35Z")
> [@Captain\_Amazing](#): > > I don’t understand how this happens? Did people RSVP? Because, if they did, you’d know how many people are coming before you rent the paintball place. Or in the case of the boy in today’s story, his entire class said they would come to his party which was going to be held at a church (or so his parents said) and NONE of them showed up. Who does this, anyway - say they’ll be there and then not show up? And especially doing that to little kids - in this case, a 7-year-old? ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [October 26, 2018, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/33 "2018-10-26T00:39:13Z")
Here’s another story, although it doesn’t say anything about the child being autistic. A large percentage of the comments say there has to be more to the story. TL : DR - A family planned a 6th-birthday pizza party for 15 classmates who RSVP’ed, and none of them showed up. This was such a big deal that the father flew in from Alaska, where he works. However, the boy was so excited about all the arcade games, he soon forgot about the guests not showing up. :dubious: The mom posted the story on Facebook, and said she immediately regretted it when, among other things, a TV crew showed up. > **['We don't want all the attention': Mother of 6-year-old boy whose birthday...](https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/dont-want-attention-mother-6-year-old-boy-whose-birthday-party-guests-no-shows-speaks-185110033.html?.tsrc=daily_mail&uh_test=1_13)** > > When Sil Mazzini shared a photo of her son alone at his birthday party, she says she never expected so much attention. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [November 28, 2020, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/34 "2020-11-28T23:34:36Z")
Update: Now, the stories are about the police and fire department doing a drive-by parade for a child who’s getting their last chemo or radiation treatment. Not a bad thing, but once again, how many of them had chronically ill children whose appointments they don’t bother attending, etc.? ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2020, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/35 "2020-11-29T00:57:50Z")
Are you saying there’s a problem with parents of chronically ill children not bothering to attend their appointments? And police/fire departments are unwittingly doing drive-by parades for these seriously ill children of such undeserving parents? How are the children getting to these last chemo or radiation appointments if their parents aren’t bothering to attend? The mind boggles. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2020, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/36 "2020-11-29T02:45:58Z")
No, I meant that some of the police or fire personnel may have ill or disabled children whose appointments they didn’t attend, didn’t know about their treatments, etc. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2020, 2:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/37 "2020-11-29T02:52:05Z")
Hosting 20-plus families - hope we can go back to that being an option, anywhere, soon. ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2020, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/38 "2020-11-29T03:26:21Z")
Aren’t we supposed to hate all cops now? ---
**Author:** ![needscoffee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/needscoffee/32/1076_2.png) [@needscoffee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/needscoffee)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2020, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/39 "2020-11-29T03:42:51Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > No, I meant that some of the police or fire personnel may have ill or disabled children whose appointments they didn’t attend, didn’t know about their treatments, etc But you’re begrudging the children who got the drive-by parade over these theoretical overlooked children??? Do you have any reason to fear that these cops or fire fighters have children who are undergoing chemo and radiation treatments and whose co-workers aren’t aware of it? I feel like I’m missing something. ---
**Author:** ![crowmanyclouds](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/crowmanyclouds/32/19884_2.png) [@crowmanyclouds](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/crowmanyclouds)\ **Post date:** [November 29, 2020, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553/40 "2020-11-29T05:05:34Z")
I bet those police and fire personnel paid those kids to get the 'tism and the cancer just so they could neglect their own children! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/autistic-child-has-birthday-party-nobody-comes-police-department-saves-the-day/768553.md?page=3)