# Auto Fellatio - A guy at work said he can. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 11, 2002, 11:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445 "2002-08-11T23:30:33Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2018, 4:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/61 "2018-08-23T16:51:46Z")
> [@Sunny\_Daze](#): > > Cumming? No, I’m just breathing hard. Thanks for asking though. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2018, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/62 "2018-08-23T16:52:56Z")
I think this topic is just about spent. ---
**Author:** ![Shodan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9f8e36/32.png) [@Shodan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shodan)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2018, 4:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/63 "2018-08-23T16:54:23Z")
> [@Czarcasm](#): > > I think this topic is just about spent. I prefer to believe it played itself out. Regards, Shodan ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2018, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/64 "2018-08-23T16:56:25Z")
> [@Shodan](#): > > I prefer to believe it played itself out. > > Regards, > Shodan There is just no blood left in it. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2018, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/65 "2018-08-23T17:45:26Z")
Why did I have to read this? I cannot unsee the image of a man bending over himself. ---
**Author:** ![Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ba9def/32.png) [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Just_Asking_Questions)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2018, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/66 "2018-08-23T17:52:53Z")
> [@Projammer](#): > > Zombie fellatio. Nothing like it. > > Fortunately. Shoot 'em in the…er…head! ---
**Author:** ![DocCathode](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doccathode/32/18773_2.png) [@DocCathode](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DocCathode)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2018, 7:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/67 "2018-08-23T19:46:21Z")
I used to be able to do so. I am nowhere near that flexible anymore. As Meatloaf said “A wasted youth is better by far than a wise and productive old age.” ---
**Author:** ![Doctor\_Jackson](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctor_jackson/32/32_2.png) [@Doctor\_Jackson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Doctor_Jackson)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2018, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/68 "2018-08-23T20:09:23Z")
It’s never to late for a little head to head competition. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2018, 8:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/69 "2018-08-23T20:12:50Z")
This thread sucks. :mad: ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2018, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/70 "2018-08-23T20:47:41Z")
> [@Gatopescado](#): > > This thread sucks. :mad: Well, that right there is succinct. (And it made me laugh:)) ---
**Author:** ![AskNott](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/asknott/32/5790_2.png) [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2018, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/71 "2018-08-23T22:14:55Z")
Years ago, a woman I knew lent me a copy of a flick called _Lips._ I watched it at home, and it certainly showed a scene where a fellow sucked his own. Even when I was younger and more flexible, I tried but couldn’t do it myself. ---
**Author:** ![clairobscur](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/839c29/32.png) [@clairobscur](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clairobscur)\ **Post date:** [August 23, 2018, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/72 "2018-08-23T22:15:08Z")
> [@dantheman](#): > > Why would a straight male (and not presuming the guy you know is) want to do this? The general reaction I’ve seen is along the lines of “because he can.” Because he would want to enjoy the experience and there’s nobody else available who would be willing to give him head? (This is a complete guess, and doesn’t at all imply that I tried and failed to give myself head when I was a teenager) (It also doesn’t imply that at the time I would have been equally satisfied with a boy or a girl giving me head, since I would have found both equally attractive sexually) More seriously, even the most homophobic of the most purely heterosexual men aren’t likely to have an issue with self-whatever. For instance, I’m pretty sure that even if idea of having their cock being touched by another man disgust them to the point of throwing up, they probably have no issue with masturbation. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2018, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/73 "2018-08-25T21:17:08Z")
My husband can do it. Easily. ---
**Author:** ![Colibri](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/colibri/32/1841_2.png) [@Colibri](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Colibri)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2018, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/74 "2018-08-25T22:08:26Z")
> [@kambuckta](#): > > WHAT? AND NOBODY HAS COME UP WITH THE CLASSIC YET?? > Q: Why do dogs lick their balls? > > A: Because they can Or, as George Carlin said about watching his dog lick himself, “If I could do that I’d never have to leave the house.” ---
**Author:** ![E-DUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/e-dub/32/403_2.png) [@E-DUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/E-DUB)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2018, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/75 "2018-08-25T22:17:00Z")
I saw Ron Jeremy do it in a movie once. (They won’t let him back in now.) ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2018, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/76 "2018-10-09T04:27:44Z")
I knew there was a thread about this somewhere. Last night, I was watching some bat videos, and of course there were bat mating videos in the mix. A bat’s penis expands about 10 times in size when it’s erect, and they can indeed blow themselves, especially if they’re hanging upside down and have gravity on their side. :eek: One video was taken at a zoo, and this white stuff splattered all over the window, and the woman filming said she wondered for a split second where all that white paint came from. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2018, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/77 "2018-10-09T04:36:08Z")
> [@Sunny\_Daze](#): > > Cumming? One wonders if anyone has ever done this, successfully or otherwise, in a small town outside Des Moines, Iowa, or a larger town near Atlanta? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Sicks\_Ate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Sicks\_Ate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sicks_Ate)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2018, 8:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/78 "2018-10-09T08:26:08Z")
> [@Sunny\_Daze](#): > > Cumming? > [@nearwildheaven](#): > > One wonders if anyone has ever done this, successfully or otherwise, in a small town outside Des Moines, Iowa, or a larger town near Atlanta? > > 😃 I want to do this event just for the name: [http://ridinggravel.com/event/24-hours-of-cumming/](http://ridinggravel.com/event/24-hours-of-cumming/) ---
**Author:** ![Darren\_Garrison](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/darren_garrison/32/92_2.png) [@Darren\_Garrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darren_Garrison)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2018, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/79 "2018-10-09T12:22:21Z")
> [@TVGuy](#): > > in my, um, experience, it’s really been a matter of a very flexible back and … er … how do you say this politely … um, “magnitude” [Pop pop](https://youtube.com/watch?v=dyp9Qw12boI). (There–you’ll never watch reruns of _Community_ the same again.) ---
**Author:** ![Shagnasty](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9dc877/32.png) [@Shagnasty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shagnasty)\ **Post date:** [October 9, 2018, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445/80 "2018-10-09T15:25:14Z")
I used to be able to do it when I was a skinny gymnast just to see if I could. It is just a novelty and doesn’t feel like much. It is like trying to tickle yourself. It doesn’t work that well even if you can pull it off. I was able to do it the last time I tried about 10 years ago. It is a cool yoga move but not much more than that. I wish it worked. I love blowjobs more than anything especially from my priest girlfriend - holy shit! - I still haven’t gotten her to tell me her rate and I wish I could get the same effect myself but it doesn’t work that way. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auto-fellatio-a-guy-at-work-said-he-can/123445.md?page=5)