# Auuuuughhhhhh! They're onto me!

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auuuuughhhhhh-theyre-onto-me/104756>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [April 21, 2002, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auuuuughhhhhh-theyre-onto-me/104756 "2002-04-21T02:53:14Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 3\
**Page:** 1

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**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\
**Post date:** [April 21, 2002, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auuuuughhhhhh-theyre-onto-me/104756/1 "2002-04-21T02:53:14Z")

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I was doing a Google search and clicked on one of the links they provided. Almost immediately, it changed from a humor site to a porn site, the kind that won’t let you backpage out without a fight.

Then I got this “Windows Alert”, telling me,

\*\*"Alert! You just visited porn site !  
Cleaning your browser cash will not help to hide it !  
Windows log every step that you make during serf !

You can use special software to [link]eliminate special tracks[/link]  
of sites which you visited and **save your privacy**.

Don’t you want that your wife, childrens , friends or boss find what sites did you just visit ?

So,[link]download evidance eliminator for free[/link] now."\*\*

Charming, I thought. But the sign wouldn’t go away. It’s not a pop-up; it’s kind of superimposed over the screen images. I couldn’t close it out (I found out afterwards that I can minimize it by clicking elsewhere on the screen. But I still can’t close it out completely.). So I clicked on their stupid link, thinking they had it rigged so you couldn’t close out without at least seeing their pitch. (Why didn’t I just reboot, you ask? Because I’d been doing this search in order to put a link in an MPSIMS reply, and I didn’t want to wait that long.)

So I’m looking at this window. Title bar says, \*\*“YOU HAVE A BIG PROBLEM”.

"401 Browser Problem — Please Wait.  
Your computer has been tracked.

Your IP is under investigation: xx.xxx.xx.xx  
Your ISP is co-operating: “WIDGET”  
They know you are using: BillGatesIsARichGeek v5.x  
Your computer is: Picosht XX  
Evidence of your activities: [http://badnastydirty.html](http://badnastydirty.html)"\*\*

Now, underneath the URL and other answers is this:

**"porn body body porn body child privacy"**

😕

It goes on to say:

\*\*"The authorities know about you.  
Do your family know this is what you  
have been looking at?  
Your Internet habits are being investigated.

Your risk status for further investigation: VERY HIGH RISK."\*\*

I think I’ll go hide under the bed…

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**Author:** ![lorinada](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/b5e925/32.png) [@lorinada](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lorinada)\
**Post date:** [April 21, 2002, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auuuuughhhhhh-theyre-onto-me/104756/2 "2002-04-21T03:03:10Z")

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> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by Rilchiam \*  
> **Cleaning your browser cash will not help to hide it !  
> Windows log every step that you make during serf !**

So, what they’re trying to tell you is they know you’ve been laundering money?

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**Author:** ![Tinkertoy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f19dbf/32.png) [@Tinkertoy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tinkertoy)\
**Post date:** [April 21, 2002, 3:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/auuuuughhhhhh-theyre-onto-me/104756/3 "2002-04-21T03:14:39Z")

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So you post it here.

Great now everyone who opens your OP will be tracked also.

Where the heck did I put my Aluminum hat?