# Avast me hearties! Prepare for boarding! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 23, 2005, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047 "2005-09-23T13:59:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![ArrMatey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/arrmatey/32/3522_2.png) [@ArrMatey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ArrMatey)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/141 "2005-09-23T21:13:18Z")
_awaits in the hold, pistols at the ready, as the captain drops down. Fifty fresh crewmen, too._ Just playin’ possum, lass. Now, let’s set the sails and take the good captain with us. Her crew can chase if they like. _and Arr!'s crew sails off into the sunset_ ---
**Author:** ![Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/regallag_the_axe/32/445_2.png) [@Regallag\_The\_Axe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regallag_The_Axe)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/142 "2005-09-23T21:14:31Z")
Ok, now I demand my fair share of plunder for services rendered. The total comes to… one thousand dubloons. ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/143 "2005-09-23T21:26:59Z")
> [@ArrMatey!](#): > > _awaits in the hold, pistols at the ready, as the captain drops down. Fifty fresh crewmen, too._ > > Just playin’ possum, lass. Now, let’s set the sails and take the good captain with us. Her crew can chase if they like. > > _and Arr!'s crew sails off into the sunset_ ::runs to cabin. drags out Hemi outboard motor (“damn, that thing’s heavy”):: YaWanna! Here! Let the chase begin! ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/144 "2005-09-23T21:27:41Z")
> [@ArrMatey!](#): > > _awaits in the hold, pistols at the ready, as the captain drops down. Fifty fresh crewmen, too._ > > Just playin’ possum, lass. Now, let’s set the sails and take the good captain with us. Her crew can chase if they like. > > _and Arr!'s crew sails off into the sunset_ ::runs to cabin. drags out Hemi outboard motor (“damn, that thing’s heavy”):: YaWanna! Here! Let the chase begin! The Captain (and I guess Inigo as well) _must_ be rescued! ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/145 "2005-09-23T21:46:30Z")
Cool…duel hemi’s! :: Facing 51 enemies :: Well _this_ is all I have to fight with…which of you shall I run through first? ---
**Author:** ![YaWanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/bbce88/32.png) [@YaWanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YaWanna)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 9:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/146 "2005-09-23T21:51:02Z")
This thing’s got a hemi? ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/147 "2005-09-23T21:55:10Z")
I’m in the hold, fighting too! And as Captain’s prerogative, I’ve got a pistol! _pulls it out and cocks it squarely at **ArrMatey**!_ Turn this ship around, _boyo_. ---
**Author:** ![YaWanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/bbce88/32.png) [@YaWanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YaWanna)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/148 "2005-09-23T21:55:54Z")
All right, mateys, we’re closin’ in on 'em fast. **Mr bus guy** , how’s the new ammo, er, _supply_ coming? Check that litterbox! And somebody stand by with that bucket o’blood(y stuff), just in case! ---
**Author:** ![Anaamika](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5f9b8f/32.png) [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 10:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/149 "2005-09-23T22:09:26Z")
We’ll win this yet! (YaWanna, I am now officially leaving for the weekend. I expect you to take care of things until the Second Mate shows up!) ---
**Author:** ![Inigo\_Montoya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inigo_montoya/32/124_2.png) [@Inigo\_Montoya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inigo_Montoya)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/150 "2005-09-23T22:10:31Z")
> [@Anaamika](#): > > I’m in the hold, fighting too! And as Captain’s prerogative, I’ve got a pistol! _pulls it out and cocks it squarely at **ArrMatey**!_ :: also cocks squarely at **ArrMatey** and prepares to … er … fire :: :smack: ---
**Author:** ![eleanorigby](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ee7513/32.png) [@eleanorigby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eleanorigby)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/151 "2005-09-23T22:14:56Z")
Oy, Captainess! Give Arr Matey a sip from your hip flask! pssst…but soft, my Captainess. I slipped some Viagra in the rum! **Arr Matey** wil only be thinkin’ 'bout his own plank soon… \ Try the rumaki–really, it’s very good. Oy! **anyrose** --bosun’s meat tender yet? Lemme know, and as soon as it is…I’ll try out my own personal recipe on it. Heh. (think am channelling the bawdiest cook in pirate history over here…) ---
**Author:** ![YaWanna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/bbce88/32.png) [@YaWanna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YaWanna)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/152 "2005-09-23T22:17:50Z")
_wonders if **Inigo** has any “ammo” left…_ ---
**Author:** ![Ludy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/d6d6ee/32.png) [@Ludy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludy)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 10:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/153 "2005-09-23T22:26:14Z")
**wakes up, rubs the sleep out of her eyes, looks around.** Oh crap, I kinda missed out on that one. Apparently I am not so good a the lookout thing. _Swings down to the deck with my trusted knife between my teeth_ But I can swing on rigging like nobody’s business. I’m ready for the fight Captain, sorry for the nap. ---
**Author:** ![Anastasaeon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Anastasaeon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anastasaeon)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 10:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/154 "2005-09-23T22:29:59Z")
_also wakes up, slips on her big. big boots and grabs her trusty sai_ _glances around to see if anyone needs a sharp point between their ribs_ ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 11:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/155 "2005-09-23T23:05:49Z")
> [@eleanorigby](#): > > Oy, Captainess! Give Arr Matey a sip from your hip flask! > pssst…but soft, my Captainess. I slipped some Viagra in the rum! **Arr Matey** wil only be thinkin’ 'bout his own plank soon… > \ > > Try the rumaki–really, it’s very good. Oy! **anyrose** --bosun’s meat tender yet? Lemme know, and as soon as it is…I’ll try out my own personal recipe on it. > > Heh. > > (think am channelling the bawdiest cook in pirate history over here…) ::turns around startled, wiping lips:: hmm? what? oh yes! tender! very tender! 😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃😃 ---
**Author:** ![Muffin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muffin/32/4341_2.png) [@Muffin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Muffin)\ **Post date:** [September 23, 2005, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/156 "2005-09-23T23:11:31Z")
[hijack]My crew (a couple of dozen women) and I (a male), are heading off for the weekend tomorrow for our last on-water bash for the season. They are a dragon boat canoe racing team of breast cancer survivors whom I coach, and in all seriousness, they are my heros.[/hijack] ---
**Author:** ![brownie55](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f14d63/32.png) [@brownie55](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brownie55)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2005, 2:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/157 "2005-09-24T02:00:15Z")
> [@Muffin](#): > > [hijack]My crew (a couple of dozen women) and I (a male), are heading off for the weekend tomorrow for our last on-water bash for the season. They are a dragon boat canoe racing team of breast cancer survivors whom I coach, and in all seriousness, they are my heros.[/hijack] What kind of guy calls himself Muffin? OTOH, Captain, Can I shoot something? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Weird\_One](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/7bcc69/32.png) [@The\_Weird\_One](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Weird_One)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2005, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/158 "2005-09-24T13:41:40Z")
Avast, me hearties, I’m back! (but briefly) Whadaya mean, how did I get here? I, uh, I’m a really fast swimmer. Yeah, that’s it! Now, what’ve I missed? The cap’n’s in trouble, you say? _quickly swims over to the enemy ship_ _climbs on deck, dripping wet_ [coyly]Ahoy, boys![/coyly] _procedes to “distract” **ArrMatey** ’s crew_ ---
**Author:** ![Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/cab0a1/32.png) [@Man\_With\_a\_Cat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Man_With_a_Cat)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2005, 8:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/159 "2005-09-24T20:06:07Z")
> [@brownie55](#): > > What kind of guy calls himself Muffin? > > OTOH, Captain, Can I shoot something? Here, have another load of deadly Cuervo/Smokey ammo. I fed them overnight a mix of strong fish, and mild laxative. They’re a bit worn, but sleeping soundly knowing they gave their best (or worst) to the cause! ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2005, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047/160 "2005-09-24T20:11:57Z")
> [@mr bus guy](#): > > Here, have another load of deadly Cuervo/Smokey ammo. I fed them overnight a mix of strong fish, and mild laxative. They’re a bit worn, but sleeping soundly knowing they gave their best (or worst) to the cause! “merrrowrr!!! (fft fft fft)” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avast-me-hearties-prepare-for-boarding/323047.md?page=9)