# Avatards **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [October 5, 2010, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161 "2010-10-05T19:22:30Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 12
**Author:** ![Tom\_Scud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@Tom\_Scud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Scud)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/221 "2010-10-07T18:56:29Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > Only “actual gods”? Kind of hard when they’re all made up, i’n’it. Is there some base number of required believers we’re going to use to determine which ones are “actual”? Dibs on [Banjo](http://oots.wikia.com/wiki/Banjo_the_Clown). ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/222 "2010-10-07T19:19:58Z")
I want the IPU. Then, I can accuse anyone who doesn’t upload an avatar of trying to copy me. ---
**Author:** ![elmwood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmwood/32/3060_2.png) [@elmwood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elmwood)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/223 "2010-10-07T19:50:15Z")
> [@Peeta\_Mellark](#): > > Oh, nice discussion on BAUT Forums. I really enjoyed reading that one, thanks. You’re welcome. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 7:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/224 "2010-10-07T19:54:09Z")
I believe avatars should not only be allowed, but be mandatory. However, they must be chosen not by the individual, but rather assigned by a consensus of SDMB peers via poll in the Avatar Assignment Forum ( **AAF** ). You’ve got to earn your avatar. How others see you is more relevant than how you see yourself. Newbies would start with a featureless, generic avatar, but after a sufficient number of posts, allowing fellow Dopers get a good “feel” for the Newbie’s personality, one will eventually be inclined to post the candidates name in the **AAF** , along with an avatar they feel best represents them. Other Dopers are then encouraged to upload alternate avatars until, say, a dozen are posted in the candidate’s thread. Then, a poll is called forth and the winning avatar is permanently bonded next to the candidate’s username, for all the world to see, on each and every post they make, from that moment on. Perhaps, as a money making venture, \*Creative Loafing \*can permit disgruntled Dopers to _buy-out_ of particularly distasteful avatar assignments for $100 (in similar fashion to soldiers, with sufficient resources, in various armies throughout history, being permitted to buy their way out of service). Likewise, if a Doper changes over time (e.g. becomes less of an ass), their name may pop back up in the **AAF** and a new avatar may be voted in and assigned. Think of the anticipatory thrill of lurking in your avatar assignment thread, anxiously awaiting the various avatars your peers offer up for you. Sure, you can champion some, discourage others, but in the end, your pleas will carry little sway—if a majority of Dopers think, say, a wilted penis represents you most accurately, a wilted penis avatar you will be assigned. It’s downright democratic. ---
**Author:** ![bucketybuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/898d66/32.png) [@bucketybuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bucketybuck)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/225 "2010-10-07T20:32:56Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > They have a completely irrational dislike of avatars, so they think that no one else should be allowed to have them Thats untrue actually. I think people should be allowed to have them. I just think you would be a bit of a weenie to actually want one. Perhaps I will write a OP sometime expanding on this. ---
**Author:** ![Aji\_de\_Gallina](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/aji_de_gallina/32/260_2.png) [@Aji\_de\_Gallina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aji_de_Gallina)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/226 "2010-10-07T20:38:31Z")
> [@Gustav](#): > > “Smarter than average” is elitist now? Damn, that bar just keeps dropping lower every day. I’d go for “There is a non-zero number of people whose cognitive abilites are lower than mine” ---
**Author:** ![wonky](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wonky/32/393_2.png) [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 8:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/227 "2010-10-07T20:49:04Z")
> [@VinylTurnip](#): > > > [@jsgoddess](#): > > > > Nothing is worse than dope memes. The worst one? “This is the smartest board on the internet!” Yes, if the internet is solely comprised of the [straightdope.com](http://straightdope.com) domain, and even then it’s a tie. > > > [@jsgoddess](#): > > > > It also doesn’t take a huge amount of elitist, arrogant, smug posters who react with kneejerk conservatism to any hint of change and who promote themselves as smarter than average to drag down a forum. This conversation about avatars is illustrative. People actually think posting here is a status symbol. It’s hilarious. > > Ignoring for the moment your hyperbole and strawman-building (“status symbol,” really?), you provide yet another baffling example of a poster whose opinion of this board appears to range from indifference to sneering contempt, and yet— here you remain, day after day, as if unable to tear yourself away. If nothing about this board sets it apart from the others (except what you see as lofty and unsupported claims of intellectualism), why waste your precious time here at all, let alone advocate so strenuously for a feature you can already enjoy on innumerable other discussion boards that are surely more worthy of your presence? I didn’t say the board is worthless, though some of the participants are. I’m saying the board has a vocal contingent of socially retarded misanthropes who genuinely believe they are super special and that this board is remarkable. I’m here because it suits me well enough. That doesn’t mean I think there’s anything particularly brilliant or wonderful about the majority of the posters here, just that it’s generally good enough, and I hardly have to love the lot of you. There’s astonishing room for improvement and no cause for laurel resting even if, you know, there had ever been laurels to start with. But some of you people clutch the board to your breasties like anti-vaxxer mommies protecting their children. Vaccines, and avatars, won’t hurt diddums. ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 9:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/228 "2010-10-07T21:17:17Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > We’re in the Pit, you moron. Since we’re taking ownership of subforums, \*my \*fucking Pit. So you’re saying that the avatars would only be allowed in the Pit, but not GD? No? Then shut up, you idiot. I don’t give a crap if avatars appear in MPSIMS, or IMHO, or even the pit - places where a side discussion of that picture of Cookie Monster would probably _elevate_ the conversation. And I’m only mildly peeved by the notion of avatars in GD, since most people wouldn’t bother mentioning the stupid things. But to the miniscule degree that they would crap up the forum, that’s a minisculity that is better left at zero. > [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > The problem here is that we’re assuming people who don’t want avatars have any logical objection. Which they don’t. As the saying goes, you can’t argue out what wasn’t argued in. They have a completely irrational dislike of avatars, so they think that no one else should be allowed to have them, even though they can’t give you a good reason why, nor can then explain how it will have any negative impact on them since they can leave the damned things turned off and refuse to upload one of their own. When a person has to lie about their opponents’ postions to make their point, that’s pretty good proof that their point is crap and they’re full of shit. Don’t you agree? > [@Tibbytoes](#): > > I believe avatars should not only be allowed, but be mandatory. However, they must be chosen not by the individual, but rather assigned by a consensus of SDMB peers via poll in the Avatar Assignment Forum ( **AAF** ). You’ve got to earn your avatar. How others see you is more relevant than how you see yourself. > > Newbies would start with a featureless, generic avatar, but after a sufficient number of posts, allowing fellow Dopers get a good “feel” for the Newbie’s personality, one will eventually be inclined to post the candidates name in the **AAF** , along with an avatar they feel best represents them. Other Dopers are then encouraged to upload alternate avatars until, say, a dozen are posted in the candidate’s thread. Then, a poll is called forth and the winning avatar is permanently bonded next to the candidate’s username, for all the world to see, on each and every post they make, from that moment on. > > Perhaps, as a money making venture, \*Creative Loafing \*can permit disgruntled Dopers to _buy-out_ of particularly distasteful avatar assignments for $100 (in similar fashion to soldiers, with sufficient resources, in various armies throughout history, being permitted to buy their way out of service). Likewise, if a Doper changes over time (e.g. becomes less of an ass), their name may pop back up in the **AAF** and a new avatar may be voted in and assigned. > > Think of the anticipatory thrill of lurking in your avatar assignment thread, anxiously awaiting the various avatars your peers offer up for you. Sure, you can champion some, discourage others, but in the end, your pleas will carry little sway—if a majority of Dopers think, say, a wilted penis represents you most accurately, a wilted penis avatar you will be assigned. It’s downright democratic. What a terrible idea. ---
**Author:** ![Red\_Barchetta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/da6949/32.png) [@Red\_Barchetta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Red_Barchetta)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/229 "2010-10-07T21:39:34Z")
> [@bucketybuck](#): > > I just think you would be a bit of a weenie to actually want one. But I don’t _want_ one, per se. I want others to have them for the aforementioned reasons. ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/230 "2010-10-07T21:42:53Z")
> [@begbert2](#): > > What a terrible idea. Dopers realizing their posting reputations merit repugnant avatar assignment will indeed consider this idea, “terrible”. You may wish to start saving for the $100 buy-out…😃 ---
**Author:** ![Inner\_Stickler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/inner_stickler/32/318_2.png) [@Inner\_Stickler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Inner_Stickler)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/231 "2010-10-07T21:44:41Z")
I apologize for my fucked up Kindergarten Cop movie analogy. It was offensive and inappropriate and I apologize. Please feel free to substitute Labyrinth and David Bowie’s Package. ---
**Author:** ![bucketybuck](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/898d66/32.png) [@bucketybuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bucketybuck)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/232 "2010-10-07T21:54:19Z")
> [@Red\_Barchetta](#): > > > [@bucketybuck](#): > > > > I just think you would be a bit of a weenie to actually want one. > > But I don’t _want_ one, per se. I want others to have them for the aforementioned reasons. You want them to be weenies? ---
**Author:** ![conway](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ec9cab/32.png) [@conway](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/conway)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 9:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/233 "2010-10-07T21:55:12Z")
> [@Inner\_Stickler](#): > > I apologize for my fucked up Kindergarten Cop movie analogy. It was offensive and inappropriate and I apologize. Please feel free to substitute Labyrinth and David Bowie’s Package. Too late. Your avatar will now be Arnold denying the existence of a tumor. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 10:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/234 "2010-10-07T22:05:18Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#): > > But some of you people clutch the board to your breasties like anti-vaxxer mommies protecting their children. In the interest of maintaining an accurate vilification chart, are these anti-vaxxers the same posters who’d deny gays the right to marry and women the right to vote, or a different group? And I know it’s tempting, but you might consider being a bit more economical with the slanderous comparisons or you’re going to exhaust them before you know it. You’re already burned through “misogynists,” “homophobes,” and now “conspiracy nuts”— I guess you can still use “Nazis,” although I did imply it myself— it’d just be a shame if you ran out of your high-caliber smears and had nothing left but tame curses, like “rascals” or “ninnies,” which would be really anticlimactic. Ooh! I thought of one: people who don’t like message board avatars are like just _slave traders_! You could even get two slurs out of that, using the “Atlantic slave trade” and the “kidnapper/pimp for underage girls” definitions. (If I think of any others, I’ll let you know.) ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/235 "2010-10-07T22:14:56Z")
> [@Tibbytoes](#): > > > [@begbert2](#): > > > > What a terrible idea. > > Dopers realizing their posting reputations merit repugnant avatar assignment will indeed consider this idea, “terrible”. > > You may wish to start saving for the $100 buy-out…😃 Why yes, that’s certainly the only possible objection I could possibly have to this brilliant idea. Obviously, if I don’t think it’s a brilliant idea to slap images on people against their will, based on the opinions of the handful of people on the board who care about any given poster’s image (a list that doubtlessly starts with the people who _hate_ them, whoever they are), then it must be because I am of the opinion that I myself am universally hated. I only post here because I’m a masochist, see. ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/236 "2010-10-07T22:57:01Z")
> [@begbert2](#): > > > [@Tibbytoes](#): > > > > Dopers realizing their posting reputations merit repugnant avatar assignment will indeed consider this idea, “terrible”. > > > > You may wish to start saving for the $100 buy-out…😃 > > Why yes, that’s certainly the only possible objection I could possibly have to this brilliant idea. Obviously, if I don’t think it’s a brilliant idea to slap images on people against their will, based on the opinions of the handful of people on the board who care about any given poster’s image (a list that doubtlessly starts with the people who _hate_ them, whoever they are), then it must be because I am of the opinion that I myself am universally hated. > > I only post here because I’m a masochist, see. Yes, I see perfectly clear… …would you like to be assigned [this](http://www.thebcclan.com/forums/Smileys/default/PANTIES_IN_A_BUNCH.jpg) avatar, or [this](http://vidiot.typepad.com/telescreen/files/poop.jpg) one? ---
**Author:** ![begbert2](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/begbert2/32/3357_2.png) [@begbert2](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/begbert2)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/237 "2010-10-07T23:00:31Z")
> [@Tibbytoes](#): > > > [@begbert2](#): > > > > Why yes, that’s certainly the only possible objection I could possibly have to this brilliant idea. Obviously, if I don’t think it’s a brilliant idea to slap images on people against their will, based on the opinions of the handful of people on the board who care about any given poster’s image (a list that doubtlessly starts with the people who _hate_ them, whoever they are), then it must be because I am of the opinion that I myself am universally hated. > > > > I only post here because I’m a masochist, see. > > Yes, I see perfectly clear… > …would you like to be assigned [this](http://www.thebcclan.com/forums/Smileys/default/PANTIES_IN_A_BUNCH.jpg) avatar, or [this](http://vidiot.typepad.com/telescreen/files/poop.jpg) one? Wouldn’t much matter _what_ I liked, under your proposed plan, now would it? ETA: Were I _forced_ to pick an icon, it would actually be [this](http://www.stoneville.co.uk/images/stones/marble/White_Crystal.jpg). Since you asked. ---
**Author:** ![Tibby](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tibby/32/17030_2.png) [@Tibby](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tibby)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/238 "2010-10-07T23:11:05Z")
> [@begbert2](#): > > > [@Tibbytoes](#): > > > > Yes, I see perfectly clear… > > …would you like to be assigned [this](http://www.thebcclan.com/forums/Smileys/default/PANTIES_IN_A_BUNCH.jpg) avatar, or [this](http://vidiot.typepad.com/telescreen/files/poop.jpg) one? > > Wouldn’t much matter _what_ I liked, under your proposed plan, now would it? Well….no, but I thought it would be advantageous for me to at least give the appearance of benevolence and let you believe you have a say in the matter (I am,after all,campaigning for a Mother Theresa-ish type avatar). ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 11:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/239 "2010-10-07T23:14:56Z")
> [@bucketybuck](#): > > > [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > > > They have a completely irrational dislike of avatars, so they think that no one else should be allowed to have them > > Thats untrue actually. I think people should be allowed to have them. > > I just think you would be a bit of a weenie to actually want one. I think you would have to be a bit of a weenie to freak out at the idea of someone seeing your picture on the internet – when you actually posted it there to begin with. But that’s just me. (Besides, you needed an entire thread to tell people this? “Heeeheee, you’re all a bunch of dorks!!!”) ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [October 7, 2010, 11:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161/240 "2010-10-07T23:19:55Z")
> [@Tibbytoes](#): > > > [@begbert2](#): > > > > Wouldn’t much matter _what_ I liked, under your proposed plan, now would it? > > Well….no, but I thought it would be advantageous for me to at least give the appearance of benevolence and let you believe you have a say in the matter (I am,after all,campaigning for a Mother Theresa-ish type avatar). I actually somewhat prefer your idea, because there’s at least a chance it would lead to a “mutually assured destruction” scenario where nobody would post anything too cutesy or obnoxious for fear of instantaneous and catastrophic reprisal. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161.md?page=11) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/avatards/556161.md?page=13)