# Awesome Parental Advice **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [June 22, 2023, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awesome-parental-advice/985918 "2023-06-22T03:05:36Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 6\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2023, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awesome-parental-advice/985918/21 "2023-06-23T18:37:59Z")
My mother told me never to pass up a good bathroom. ---
**Author:** ![superwombat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superwombat/32/16616_2.png) [@superwombat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/superwombat)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2023, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awesome-parental-advice/985918/22 "2023-06-23T20:27:10Z")
“Never drink so much that you can’t _enjoy_ a beer on the hottest summer day.” ---
**Author:** ![Dallas\_Jones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dallas_jones/32/3277_2.png) [@Dallas\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dallas_Jones)\ **Post date:** [June 23, 2023, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awesome-parental-advice/985918/23 "2023-06-23T20:38:44Z")
> [@InternetLegend](#): > > “You know how to play piano. You could always be a piano player in a whorehouse rather than resort to politics.” My sister was a whore in a piano house. In between “jobs” she learned to tune, and play a piano. She is now a high school music teacher. Like the old saying goes, when life gives you lemons, learn to drink Tequila. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2023, 4:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awesome-parental-advice/985918/24 "2023-06-25T04:52:35Z")
From my dad to my son: “I’ve lived more than six decades and I’ve learned that there’s one thing that will always be true.” “Farts will always be funny.” ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2023, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awesome-parental-advice/985918/25 "2023-06-25T05:22:21Z")
From my Dad: “If it earns you an honest dollar, it’s a good job.” My Dad had had a few of those less-than-desirable jobs that he fell back on when necessary, and they had got him through. When I fell into thin times, that advice got me through too. Those less-than-desirable honest jobs paying honest dollars kept the rent paid, gas in the tank, food on the table, etc.; just as much as a nice white-collar job did. Maybe they didn’t pay as much, but they paid enough to live on. “Don’t play cards with people you don’t know, don’t piss into the wind, and don’t \_\_\_\_\_.” This was Dad’s typical go-to when he had something profound to include, but he didn’t want to be too overt. The blank was filled in with whatever wisdom Dad wished to impart: “don’t speed, don’t drink and drive, don’t string a girl along, don’t count on a friend paying you back,” and so on. Incidentally, not playing cards with people I don’t know has always come in handy. I’ve observed a few games where … well, let’s just say that things were less than honest, and there was a mark to be plucked. And it was. Following Dad’s advice, I did not participate; I just observed. And what I saw … it wasn’t pretty. My advice to my Doper friends is that you never play cards with people you don’t know, as Dad advised. “You can’t fly on one wing.” Dad’s typical advice before Sunday dinner. We always had a cocktail hour before Sunday dinner, which was actually an hour long, and consisted of two cocktails before dinner. Why? Because you can’t fly on one wing; you need two. Hence, two cocktails in the hour preceding dinner. I still keep to that tradition. ---
**Author:** ![Tripler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripler/32/21807_2.png) [@Tripler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tripler)\ **Post date:** [June 25, 2023, 3:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awesome-parental-advice/985918/26 "2023-06-25T15:50:40Z")
> [@NinthAcolyte](#): > > “Don’t join the bomb squad, kid.” I did, and it worked out for me just fine–clumsiness and all. On the topic of purchasing real estate whilst living a ‘nomadic’ lifestyle, Poppa Trip once said, “_Don’t buy a house unless you are going to settle down there._” I should have listened to him, and should’vr rented while living in Georgia. “Fools in real estate, and their money, are soon parted.” Tripler In retrospect, I learned that negotiation on a price is _a thing._ [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awesome-parental-advice/985918.md?page=1)