# Awkward erections **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 10, 2013, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131 "2013-07-10T13:03:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Johnny\_L.A](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnny_l.a/32/1084_2.png) [@Johnny\_L.A](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_L.A)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/41 "2013-07-11T03:41:32Z")
This thread is not what I was expecting. I was thinking more along the lines of the Tower of Pisa, and other erections that went wrong. ---
**Author:** ![\_Olive](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/_/4af34b/32.png) [@\_Olive](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/_Olive)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 3:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/42 "2013-07-11T03:47:45Z")
no pictures? ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/43 "2013-07-11T03:59:50Z")
Awkward? Not in my vocabulary. Stand proud godammit! That’s what _I_ say. ---
**Author:** ![Curiosity\_Kills\_Her](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8c91f0/32.png) [@Curiosity\_Kills\_Her](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Curiosity_Kills_Her)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 4:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/44 "2013-07-11T04:32:30Z")
I ended up sitting on the lap of a manager once. He got an erection. It was awkward. I pretended it never happened, like any decent woman should. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 4:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/45 "2013-07-11T04:37:38Z")
> [@Curiosity\_Kills\_Her](#): > > I ended up sitting on the lap of a manager once. He got an erection. It was awkward. I pretended it never happened, like any decent woman should. We’ll assume this was not a lap-dance situation. ---
**Author:** ![Rick](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/9f8e36/32.png) [@Rick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rick)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/46 "2013-07-11T04:44:51Z")
Middle school. Had to carry book in front of me way more often then I cared to. ---
**Author:** ![Procrustus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/procrustus/32/2994_2.png) [@Procrustus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Procrustus)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 4:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/47 "2013-07-11T04:48:05Z")
> [@Senegoid](#): > > Nevertheless, there’s nothing uncommon about male clients getting a hard-on during a massage, and drapery notwithstanding, it’s obvious. > > In professional massage classes, the student are explicitly taught to simply ignore it. > > – Senegoid, CMT (yes, really) Yeah, not uncommon. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/48 "2013-07-11T04:49:33Z")
> [@Longshanks](#): > > Depends. No, that’s for a different awkward problem. ---
**Author:** ![Rodgers01](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b19c9b/32.png) [@Rodgers01](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rodgers01)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/49 "2013-07-11T06:06:12Z")
In 8th grade Catholic school we had to go to mass twice a week, and god knows why (well, aside from the fact that I was, you know, _in 8th grade_) but every time we had to kneel it seemed I got a hard on for the rest of the service. Awkward. ---
**Author:** ![LouisB](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/dfb087/32.png) [@LouisB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LouisB)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 7:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/50 "2013-07-11T07:17:12Z")
> [@panache45](#): > > No, that’s for a different awkward problem. I got your meaning instantly. Not that I’ve ever been in an awkward situation. ---
**Author:** ![si\_blakely](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d9b06d/32.png) [@si\_blakely](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/si_blakely)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 9:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/51 "2013-07-11T09:20:00Z")
How about when getting your vasectomy stitches removed? :eek: ---
**Author:** ![Locrian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/locrian/32/14146_2.png) [@Locrian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Locrian)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 9:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/52 "2013-07-11T09:41:04Z")
It hasn’t happened yet, but I work in captions/subtitles/localization. Mostly it’s TV broadcast in any genre, major (theatrical) film reformats, I’ve done 100 different films a month consistently. I’ve only worked on soft porn-- meaning, just consensual sex or self-pleasuring-- about twice every three months. Hey, it pays the office electricity, I suppose. You know, drunk/drugged girl, 19-20, gets on bus, bed, in shower, sometimes takes off clothes, sometimes masturbates, sometimes hooks up with BFF, etc. And it’s SOOOO fucking annoying to caption, because of the dumb-ass cameramen who feel the need to repeat everything the girl says, which causes every girl to repeat the cameraman! (1,200 captions? Really??) Still, there’s a few minutes each file where there’s no dialogue other than " ( moaning, panting, loud moaning )", and here I am at my comfy desk, and POP! There he is! 😃 With my luck, I’m expecting the fire alarm to blare whenever I get something like this to work on. I’ll hear, “Locrian! We gotta get outta here! Quick! Stand up and run outside!” and then everyone will notice Mr. Happy trying to break free of my Levis. I’ll probably run into the nearest girl and accidentally poke her leg with Locrianpenis and get a sex harassment write-up, having to unsuccessfully claim that loud ringing bells is what turned me on. ---
**Author:** ![Longshanks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Longshanks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Longshanks)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 10:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/53 "2013-07-11T10:28:28Z")
> [@\_Olive](#): > > no pictures? [![](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/8/84/Leaning_Tower_of_Pisa_(April_2012).jpg/250px-Leaning_Tower_of_Pisa_(April_2012).jpg) ](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/8/84/Leaning_Tower_of_Pisa_(April_2012).jpg/250px-Leaning_Tower_of_Pisa_(April_2012).jpg) ---
**Author:** ![Locrian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/locrian/32/14146_2.png) [@Locrian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Locrian)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 10:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/54 "2013-07-11T10:42:47Z")
> [@Longshanks](#): > > [https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/8/84/Leaning\_Tower\_of\_Pisa\_(April\_2012).jpg/250px-Leaning\_Tower\_of\_Pisa\_(April\_2012).jpg](https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/8/84/Leaning_Tower_of_Pisa_(April_2012).jpg/250px-Leaning_Tower_of_Pisa_(April_2012).jpg) Yeah, pretty much matches my angle… ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 11:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/55 "2013-07-11T11:12:08Z")
> [@Rodgers01](#): > > In 8th grade Catholic school we had to go to mass twice a week, and god knows why (well, aside from the fact that I was, you know, _in 8th grade_) but every time we had to kneel it seemed I got a hard on for the rest of the service. Awkward. That was the work of the Holy Spirit. ---
**Author:** ![twickster](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/ec9cab/32.png) [@twickster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/twickster)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/56 "2013-07-11T12:03:13Z")
> [@\_Olive](#): > > no pictures? This is out of line. Knock it off. (sic) **twickster** , MPSIMS moderator ---
**Author:** ![Longshanks](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Longshanks](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Longshanks)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 12:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/57 "2013-07-11T12:18:52Z")
Calm down mod you can take off your jackboots once in a while. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 12:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/58 "2013-07-11T12:24:58Z")
> [@Longshanks](#): > > Calm down mod you can take off your jackboots once in a while. I smell a joke, dude. > [@](#): > > (sic) woosh much? ---
**Author:** ![Chief\_Pedant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a6a055/32.png) [@Chief\_Pedant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chief_Pedant)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/59 "2013-07-11T14:06:43Z")
Well it would be awkward to get an erection so diminutive she didn’t realize you were ready. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [July 11, 2013, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131/60 "2013-07-11T14:08:23Z")
> [@Hermitian](#): > > I feel awkward already, and all I did was read this thread. What’s awkward, is the OP wants us to tell him our penis stories, yet he gives none of his own. It kind of makes my wary of why he started this thread. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/awkward-erections/663131.md?page=4)