# Babies are not cute! **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [March 13, 2005, 2:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324 "2005-03-13T14:01:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Cyros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a698b9/32.png) [@Cyros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyros)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 6:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/41 "2005-03-13T18:56:24Z")
I’m not exactly a big fan of children. I find most of the children I’ve encountered to be irritating beyond belief. Cute rarely enters into it. My crazy husband, on the other hand, thinks ultrasound pictures are cute. I think they look like aliens. I’m told I’ll feel differently about children once my baby is born in September. Let’s hope. And pets? I don’t need or want to see pictures. I don’t want to hear what “cute” thing they did. I will not even try to hide my disgusted face when your slobbering untrained dog jumps on me, barks or pees on the floor. (I think it’s unbelievably irresponsible and ridiculous to get a pet and not train them to behave). And cats and kittens? Uh, no. ---
**Author:** ![Chotii](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/71e660/32.png) [@Chotii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chotii)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/42 "2005-03-13T18:58:39Z")
> [@Unintentionally Blank](#): > > I’ll add that the act of chilbirth really bends a kid outta shape. Ours were c-sectioned and got to bypass that whole watermelon thru a nostril thing. Well, the whole squashy-head thing goes back to normal eventually. Though they do look a bit like Aztecs until then. It’s very strange. I love my children and think they’re cute. I’m certain the youngest is cute as a survival mechanism, because otherwise I’d have killed the little critter by now after the Nth night of broken sleep (she’s 19 months old now). But, tiny babies in general I usually ignore unless they’re crying frantically and then my ‘mommy must rescue baby’ impulse kicks in and I have to fight myself not to interfere. But you know what? Recently all interested in looking at them again. I mean Monday, because somebody had a brand new baby at the homeschooler’s meeting, and I was all melty over it. Friday, I found out I’m pregnant. Gee, I wonder if there’s some connection. :rolleyes: I read somewhere once that “all babies are born ugly and unfinished”. I can’t disagree. They’re also all crumpled up like baby chicks just out of the shell, and they have poker-faces. Blank. No feedback, man, nothing - unless they’re crying. I’m always so grateful when they learn to smile, because at least then you get _some_ kind of feedback. My kids have never been the sort to cry and cry, but we also don’t believe in leaving them to cry. We don’t believe “babies cry, and that’s the way it is”. We’ve always found that bouts of crying mean we’ve missed finding whatever the problem is - a second dirty diaper in 10 minutes, too hot, too cold, needs burping, hungry, clothing pinches, something. Fix that, and the crying has generally stopped. Ignore it - find later that there’s been a problem all along - and serious, deserved guilt ensues. But we’ve been lucky never to have a baby with colic. Touch wood. I like kids a lot better when they can talk, although the 15-20 month range, when they’re cute but don’t know it yet, is really fun. But that’s my kids. I don’t actually have an affinity for kids in general. ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/43 "2005-03-13T19:19:47Z")
Newborns look like Winston Churchill. (Except for my cousin’s second kid, who wasn’t nearly that attractive.) One of **Dr.J** ’s friends from high school just had a baby, and she looks so much like Winston that I had a desperate urge to learn Photoshop, just so I could edit a maritini and a little hat into her hospital picture. ---
**Author:** ![EmeraldGrue](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/dc4da7/32.png) [@EmeraldGrue](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EmeraldGrue)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 8:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/44 "2005-03-13T20:11:56Z")
No, babies are _not_ cute, don’t know what everyone else sees in 'em. I get all mushy over dogs, though. PUPPIES! ---
**Author:** ![Alice\_The\_Goon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ed8c4c/32.png) [@Alice\_The\_Goon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alice_The_Goon)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/45 "2005-03-13T20:26:08Z")
I think most babies are cute, but then I’m a baby kind of gal. I have often wondered, though, if parents of ugly kids know their kids are ugly. Or do they think they’re cute just because they’re theirs? ---
**Author:** ![pepperlandgirl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f17d59/32.png) [@pepperlandgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pepperlandgirl)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 8:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/46 "2005-03-13T20:28:43Z")
I don’t think babies are ugly, but I don’t get all gaw-gaw over them either. I have no urge to fawn over them, hold them, play with them, or otherwise spend time with babies. But I love puppies and kitties. I want a puppy so bad. Stupid “no dogs allowed” apartment _grumble_ ---
**Author:** ![Yookeroo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yookeroo/32/323_2.png) [@Yookeroo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yookeroo)\ **Post date:** [March 13, 2005, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/47 "2005-03-13T22:15:04Z")
I’m a guy and totally agree with them “wrinkled, bawling, poop machines”. Once they’re waling & talking, they’re cool, but until then, keep them away from me please. ---
**Author:** ![Oregon\_sunshine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/50afbb/32.png) [@Oregon\_sunshine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Oregon_sunshine)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 1:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/48 "2005-03-14T01:38:43Z")
When I see a baby, I see a tiny, extremely young person who doesn’t know anything and doesn’t know any better. They’re _beautiful_. ---
**Author:** ![WolfpackJeep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpackjeep/32/2921_2.png) [@WolfpackJeep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WolfpackJeep)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/49 "2005-03-14T02:23:42Z")
I’m another woman who doesn’t see what’s so cute about babies. Babies scream, eat, and poo; it takes too long for any cuteness to start showing up. And I can’t say I’ve ever encountered a baby that smelled nice. I love puppies and kittens though. Puppies have a very pleasant smell; it brings back fond memories of a time when I visited a litter of 12 golden retriever puppies, and sat on the ground while they all tried to sit in my lap. ---
**Author:** ![Revtim](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/revtim/32/1042_2.png) [@Revtim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Revtim)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 3:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/50 "2005-03-14T03:26:02Z")
I ran into an ex-girlfriend last weekend, and she had her newborn with her. I swear, I thought the thing was going to bite the ring off my finger and exclaim “myyyyy preciousssssss!”. ---
**Author:** ![Dark\_Side\_of\_the\_Floyd](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bb73d2/32.png) [@Dark\_Side\_of\_the\_Floyd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dark_Side_of_the_Floyd)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/51 "2005-03-14T04:15:57Z")
What have you got in your pocketses? ---
**Author:** ![Ashes\_Ashes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/db5fbb/32.png) [@Ashes\_Ashes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ashes_Ashes)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/52 "2005-03-14T04:20:10Z")
Most of them aren’t, I agree. Even the ones I should like the looks of, because they’re my cousins’ or friends’, nope, sorry. One looks exactly like Louie Anderson, another a blue eyed E.T., and then there’s my friend’s kid who looks just like _her_ father (and he’s much nicer than he is handsome), the poor thing. Heck, \*I \* was an ugly baby, all scrawny and blotchy. My sister looked like a chewed wad of Big Red gum with orange troll doll hair stuck on it. Maybe my standards are too high; I don’t think the Gerber baby is all that adorable, really. I wonder if there’s any correlation between people who don’t want kids and whether they find babies cute? I haven’t wanted kids since I figured out having one wasn’t a requirement that came with my ovaries. ---
**Author:** ![Acaciacath](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/c68b51/32.png) [@Acaciacath](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Acaciacath)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 4:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/53 "2005-03-14T04:35:13Z")
Add another woman to the list who thinks babies = get that thing away from me! I only really begin to like kids when you can have a conversation with them, say from 7 and up. And even then usually only in small doses. I’m 32, childless and staying that way. My SO is in full agreement. We both love dogs though and we are planning on getting at least two puppies when we eventually get the fencing around the house done. I wish it was happening tomorrow. ---
**Author:** ![Mississippienne](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d2c977/32.png) [@Mississippienne](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mississippienne)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/54 "2005-03-14T04:44:38Z")
I think babies are cute, at least most babies. When they’re brand new, all stick-like arms and legs and those little scrunched up faces, they look like little aliens. A few months later they plump out and grow hair and stuff, and then they get really pretty. I don’t think they become very interesting until they start talking, though. ---
**Author:** ![emekthian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/ecae2f/32.png) [@emekthian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/emekthian)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/55 "2005-03-14T04:49:28Z")
Whenever I see a baby or a kitten, I think “Awww, it’s so precious!”. Then I think "But wait! That’s not really cute at all. It’s kinda ugly in fact. What in the devil made me think it was for a second? Oh God! That baby/kitten is screwing with me! It’s screwing with my emotions to make me think it’s cute so I’ll feed it or play with it! _You little bastard!_" Thus I am reminded why I have a deep mistrust of anything small and initially cute. ---
**Author:** ![Tikki](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/5daacb/32.png) [@Tikki](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tikki)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/56 "2005-03-14T04:50:31Z")
I’m not alone? Yay! I don’t mind the way they look. They just don’t do anything fun. And, other than the crying and pooping thing, they just don’t do much at all. They just lay or sit there, watching the world around them. And they don’t talk. They can’t tell you what they’re thinking or share their ideas. Cats are better at communicating than babies are. Give me a 2 or 3 year old who wants to play or explore the back yard or turn the couch, cushions and a blanket into a hidey-hole and I’m much happier. When kids start using their imaginations is when they’re the most fun to be around. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/57 "2005-03-14T05:02:57Z")
Chalk up another woman who doesn’t find babies, toddlers or children cute. At 38, I still have absolutely no impulse to have any. A friend once told me that holding babies made her want one so bad her uterus contracted - :eek: Oh, put my husband down as a man who doesn’t find babies, toddlers or children cute. At 36, he also has no interest in having children. What really bugs me about feeling the way we do is that I feel we are not allowed to be honest about it in public. ---
**Author:** ![Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stranger_On_A_Train)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 5:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/58 "2005-03-14T05:11:22Z")
I’m not a chick either, and I don’t really did infants (about whom I agree with the OP and others who compared them to particuarlly hideous alien spawn) but boy do they like me. Slight hijack, but: A few years ago, I dated a girl who was like-minded about children. However, on a visit with her family on Thanksgiving we went to her brother’s house near Boston. Her brother and his wife had three kids, all girls, all under the age of three. (Yeah, they’re from an Irish-Catholic background, even though they aren’t “practicing”.) Anyway, the two older girls are all over me, like I’m some kind of favored uncle. I used to be really uncomfortable about this sort of thing, never having had siblings or younger relatives, but I’ve gotten used to the idea that people don’t instantly think I’m a child molester, and now just take the normal precautions (i.e. staying in the presence of the parents) not to be suspected of anything untoward. Anyway, come time to leave and the middle girl wants me to hold the baby. Now, this is a fussy, fussy baby. She doesn’t like to interact with her sisters yet, and doesn’t like to be held by anyone else; not Grandma (either of them) not my girlfriend (who could care less) and definitely not the girlfriend’s sister (M), who could care…um, not care…ah, hell, who wants kids badly and in lieu wants to play good aunt to her nieces. When M picks up the baby she starts screeching immediately, so I’m expecting when the infant is handed to me she’ll make a racket and I can just hand her back, problem solved. No such luck. She looked up at me with large, round eyes, turned her head to my chest, and immediately fell asleep. I think I earned M’s undying animosity after that. (Seriously, she seemed resentful to me in every further interaction.) It’s like a gift…that I have absolutely no use for whatsoever. I have a former coworker whose boys think I’m toasted cheese, as well, though there’s some measure of validity there as I always send them Christmas and birthday gifts (carefully selected books which apparently get read over and over…I guess kids still like Barbar.) In general, kids just seem to like me. I don’t dislike kids, and frankly, at least with the little 'uns, I’m often more comfortable than with adults, who want to talk about the weather and sports and work instead of play hide and seek or Go Fish, but I have a definite limit to how long I like to be around kids, and it seems to stop at about the four hour mark. I agree that puppies are much cuter from the word go, and a heck of a lot less trouble, too. Man, I wish I could have a dog. Kids? Not a chance. Stranger ---
**Author:** ![Essured](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Essured](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Essured)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/59 "2005-03-14T05:47:00Z")
I’ve never found babies to be cute. I just can’t see the appeal. I’m just neutral, until someone wants me to hold it, it starts screaming or it smells, and then I just want to get far, far away. Toddlers aren’t cute either, IMO. They make the same random, screechy noises as babies (but you’re expected to engage in toddler-conversation, and I can’t speak toddler), but worse, they’re _sticky_ and _mobile_ too! ---
**Author:** ![Shana](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3bc359/32.png) [@Shana](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shana)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2005, 6:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324/60 "2005-03-14T06:57:27Z")
I’m glad another pregnant woman came in to express her lack of enthusiasm over babies (thanks **Cyros**!)…Gosh, I don’t feel so horrible now! I’m due in September as well…and worried about the whole baby thing as I’ve never been terribly drawn to them. I think I will love the baby because she/he is mine. And I’m sure after that wrinkled up Churchhill stage passes I will even think the child is cute…here’s hoping! 😉 Now, if I see a dog across the street I have to control myself not to start screaming “Ooooooo may I PET him??? PLLLLEEEEAAASSSEEEE??” Puppies and kitties rule. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/babies-are-not-cute/294324.md?page=4)