# Bad, bad, bad Comatose mistaken ideas

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [June 10, 2022, 5:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984 "2022-06-10T17:36:07Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 4

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**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2022, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/61 "2022-06-11T17:08:26Z")

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“Come see the only Beck (a.k.a. Cherry) in captivity!”

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**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2022, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/62 "2022-06-11T17:09:02Z")

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The Li’l wrekker is mortified.😊

I have a shoe string ball as big as a soccer ball. I tried to talk her into bringing it here  
The tourists couldd get twofer. My signs and a shoestring ball. That’s the ticket.  
Alas, no.  
Her exact statement “Are you outta of your mind. I wouldn’t touch it, much less bring the effing shoestring ball in my car.”

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**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2022, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/63 "2022-06-11T17:11:24Z")

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> [@Beckdawrek](#):
>
> I’m getting kinda famous around here about signs. Seems I’m a tourist attraction.😳

[![](https://i.ytimg.com/vi/iZzVdomYHnI/hqdefault.jpg ""Signs" song by Five Man Electrical Band - Video from 1974/75 by Steve Carlsen") ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iZzVdomYHnI)

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**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2022, 5:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/64 "2022-06-11T17:33:40Z")

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Remind me and I’ll tell y’all the Saga of the Shoestring ball.

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**Author:** ![Mikkel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mikkel/32/13151_2.png) [@Mikkel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mikkel)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2022, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/65 "2022-06-11T17:38:40Z")

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You are hereby reminded. 😉

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**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2022, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/66 "2022-06-11T17:51:18Z")

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Oh, please Auntie Beck. Please tell us the Saga of the Shoestring Ball.  
🙏

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**Author:** ![nelliebly](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/nelliebly/32/5422_2.png) [@nelliebly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nelliebly)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2022, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/67 "2022-06-11T18:01:51Z")

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I want to know about the shoestring ball, too. Oo! You could post a sign, “Ward’s largest shoestring ball!” Too bad you can’t sneak into other patient rooms: you could post signs like Wall Drug.

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**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2022, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/68 "2022-06-11T18:03:48Z")

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Start doing Burma-Shave-style signs, Beck.

Don’t be dumb  
Don’t be sappy  
Bring some corn dogs  
Make me happy  
Beckdawrek

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**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2022, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/69 "2022-06-11T18:55:38Z")

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Wow! What happened to you?!?

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**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2022, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/70 "2022-06-11T19:02:17Z")

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Hey. Gotta study up on that.

I likey

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**Author:** ![thorny\_locust](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thorny_locust/32/431_2.png) [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2022, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/71 "2022-06-11T19:04:26Z")

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> [@Beckdawrek](#):
>
> A man knocked on the door and walked right in. He gave me a basket of stuff and said it was a little gift they give out. I’m mute so I just looked at him and he left.
> 
> Get this, the gift was from a local funeral home. It was, disturbingly, a telescoping fly swatter, a fan with their logo and some deadly(?) peppermint candy.

Say _what_?

That is very very strange.

It is not, however, strange at all that I’m glad you’re still alive and posting. And demanding cats. I hope you get one. Or maybe [an entire 13 kittens](https://www.npr.org/2022/06/09/1104025935/louisiana-man-rescuing-one-kitten-12-more-appeared-13). Just think what they could do to a shoestring ball!

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**Author:** ![OldGuy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/3bc359/32.png) [@OldGuy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OldGuy)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2022, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/72 "2022-06-11T19:04:37Z")

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We want to know about the shoestring ball.  
We need to know about the shoestring ball.  
We **will** know about the shoestring ball.

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**Author:** ![carnut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnut/32/3531_2.png) [@carnut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnut)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2022, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/73 "2022-06-11T22:55:30Z")

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Sign: Please knock on glass if bringing treats. That’ll horrify the nurses. 😁

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**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2022, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/74 "2022-06-11T23:13:52Z")

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Ok.  
**The Saga of the Shoestrings**

After the older 2 of my children were off to the Marines and College, the Li’l wrekker was a senior in highschool planning her departure I decided closet clean out would be a priority.  
I have 5 closets the kids used.

I started with Son-of-a-wreks closet it would be the worst one.  
And I was right. A pile of stinky clothes, straight to the burn barrel.

Toys. Mostly Lego.  
Some action figures and models. 2 school back packs. Omg. They were awful. Tossed.  
We don’t have trash pickup. It’s on me who determines the proper place to put these things. We have a landfill across the county.  
I had Mr.Wrekker take clothing and some toys to the landfill. One closet. 2 trips to the landfill. One to the recycling center. Mr.W said it’s $5 a load. Make sure you fill the truck full. He brought a trailer close to the house so I could use it. Once a week he’d haul it.

The girls rooms were just as bad.  
I got to the bottom of these closets and found shoes. Lots of shoes. Lots! I paid for all those shoes. Wow!

I got a large box. 3x4 ft. About 3ft tall. Filled it with so many shoes, we couldn’t lift it. So we tossed all the shoes in the truck bed.  
Several hours later Mr.W comes home. I see the giant box was gone. But the shoes remain. I asked “What the heck?”

He said the landfill said “No” to go recycle.He went to the recycling center. They also, say “No” the Shoestrings jam up the machinery.  
Go to the landfill.  
Mr.W tried to explain they said “No”  
to no avail.

So he comes home and says to take all the Shoestrings out.  
Holy mackerel.  
It took a week of doing it during all my free time. I started making ball of strings.  
Mr.W junks several pairs of hunting boots. I got all those strings as well.

The ball was very big. Anybody who came here laughed and said why don’t you just dump them at the county landfill. I’d say “Yeah?, Y’all go try that one.”

Finally I got them all out. The ball is the size of a soccer ball.

So we tossed all the shoes in the truck again. Mr.W goes to the landfill.  
Nope. We had used his alotment of times you can visit the landfill, that month.  
Lordy mercy. I had been into this a good month.

So he sneaks over to the recycling center. He shows them, 'No strings attached ’  
Well. They said “No” again. They can’t be sure of the soles some are composite, some are rubber. Plus rivets for the Shoestrings are metal. Can’t take them.

He comes home once again. No go.

Now see here, if I had trash pickup I could put 2 or 3 shoes in each trash bag and no one would be the wiser.

I get, what I think is a brilliant idea. I won’t burn trash for a awhile. I’ll put shoes in every bag and haul it to the landfill as soon as were in the first of the month.

He gets away with 2 times.  
The 3rd time they catch him.  
He comes home with the bag o’shoes. Lighter in his wallet for the 3 times.  
He got in the mail, a day or two later a fine for $25 for dumping inappropriate items. He puts it in file 13.

A few days ago by and he decided to try the other landfill. (We live on the county line, pay taxes on both)

He gets one load dumped. For an exorbitant fee of $7.00.  
When he gets home he’s fuming. Smoke coming out of his ears.

He gets in and tells me the price. We’re gonna have to find another way. His cell phone rings. It is the new landfill he has to come back and pick up the bag of shoes. They don’t take tennis shoes, strings or not. He told the guy “Stick them up your ass!!”

2 days later they were delivered to us and placed on the driveway.

Mr. W was livid. He stomped around for 2 days grumbling.

I was watching him outside once and I noticed the lightbulb turn on above his head. Uh oh.

He gets the tractor and starts doing some escavating. Wasn’t deep enough. He goes to his friends place who rent out backhoes and other stuff and brought a thingy home that scoops out holes.

He pushed all the shoes in it. Buried it over. Planted grass seed and promptly forgot about the debacle and went fishing.

He never paid the fine of $25.  
The county sued him. Of course he lost. He had to pay court costs. His fine and judgement and he had to pay $167. No strings attached.

This is how I got a shoestring ball.

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**Author:** ![nightshadea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/7ba0ec/32.png) [@nightshadea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nightshadea)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2022, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/75 "2022-06-11T23:22:28Z")

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i can see the exact same thing happening since that tale sums up my families thinking to a tee lol

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**Author:** ![VOW](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/vow/32/3043_2.png) [@VOW](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VOW)\
**Post date:** [June 11, 2022, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/76 "2022-06-11T23:59:16Z")

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It would probably be easier to dump a dead body at the landfill than garbage bag of shoes!

~VOW

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**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2022, 12:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/77 "2022-06-12T00:08:26Z")

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> [@VOW](#):
>
> It would probably be easier to dump a dead body at the landfill than garbage bag of shoes!

So long as the dead body in question doesn’t have shoes on.

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**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2022, 12:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/78 "2022-06-12T00:13:09Z")

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> [@kenobi\_65](#):
>
> > [@VOW](#):
> >
> > It would probably be easier to dump a dead body at the landfill than garbage bag of shoes!
> 
> So long as the dead body in question doesn’t have shoes on. -

And you use zip ties rather than rope to bind up the corpse.

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**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2022, 12:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/79 "2022-06-12T00:17:20Z")

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They have a sign at the gate of what cannot be dumped. I often wondered exactly what they will take.  
Paper?  
I guess. Boxes have to be broken down, tho’

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**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\
**Post date:** [June 12, 2022, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-comatose-mistaken-ideas/965984/80 "2022-06-12T00:28:08Z")

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You can’t be the only person who needed to throw away shoes. Was the problem that the quantity brought it to their attention? Or is everyone in two counties having to bury shoes?

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