# Bad, bad, bad, Teddy Bear murder. Sherlock-beck is on the case. No worries **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [August 14, 2022, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626 "2022-08-14T00:49:06Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 12:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/1 "2022-08-14T00:49:06Z")
So …I have, again walked up on a murder. From all the clues I’ve discovered, I deduced a Teddy was indeed murdered. I’m out in the courtyard walking and deep into the trees I see a bear arm and one plastic eye. Nothing to finger print but I see small footprints. Size 3. It’s imprinted in the moist dirt. Hey I saw a kid visiting someone this morning. He was sitting in the dayroom. He was fussing cause he wanted outside. Gramma finally let him. Thank the Lord that boy was aggravating. I can’t remember if he was toting a Teddy. Poor Teddy, he had a horrible life, I’ll bet. So … I decided to investigate the Dayroom for clues. I looked under the chairs. In one corner I found a lump of Teddy guts. It’s was very clean except the one spot of pink. Smelled like a Capri Sun kids drink. I determined Teddy was a gift to the boy from the grandparent he came to visit. And the little aggravating boy tore it up. What a brat!! So …I have a suspect. He’s not even remorseful. From my secret lair I can watch and see who’s sneaking up and down hall. The game’s afoot!!! ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/2 "2022-08-14T01:16:46Z")
This is why we need the right to arm bears. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/3 "2022-08-14T01:22:19Z")
OMG! That was great! ---
**Author:** ![SuntanLotion](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suntanlotion/32/16165_2.png) [@SuntanLotion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuntanLotion)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 1:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/4 "2022-08-14T01:26:09Z")
My first thought was a cat got em!😼🐻 ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/5 "2022-08-14T01:30:40Z")
Oh no. They ran from the kid. I’m seeing a pattern here. This is a clue. He’s must be bad kid. If he came to my house for a week I promise that kid will be a better little boy. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 1:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/6 "2022-08-14T01:31:18Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > If he came to my house for a week I promise that kid will be a better little boy. He would have been licked to death by dogs and cats, that much is certain. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/7 "2022-08-14T01:32:08Z")
That’s true, except the Siamese. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/8 "2022-08-14T01:32:40Z")
So this dame walks into my office. Former dancer, I figure, as she’s got legs that start somewhere under her armpits. “Dead teddy bear. I think it’s murder,” she says, as she takes a chair. “Please, Miss …” I stop, not knowing her name. “Beck,” she says. “That’s all you need to know.” “Fine. Have a seat.” I took a look. In addition to the legs, she had eyes you could drown in. A hat, slightly tilted, tailored suit, stockings, and heels. Better looking than most dames that walk through my door, who just want evidence of cheating husbands. “So, Miss Beck, talk to me. What happened?” [Could be continued.] ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/9 "2022-08-14T01:33:39Z")
You are good! ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/10 "2022-08-14T01:33:48Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > That’s true, except the Siamese. Yes, but the Meezers are a special case. ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/11 "2022-08-14T01:34:32Z")
Hateful, more likely. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/12 "2022-08-14T01:35:49Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > You are good! “That’s what they say, Miss Beck. But I need more information before I can get started. Tell me about the teddy bear.” ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 1:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/13 "2022-08-14T01:52:42Z")
And thus began “The Maltese Teddy.” ---
**Author:** ![SuntanLotion](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suntanlotion/32/16165_2.png) [@SuntanLotion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuntanLotion)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/14 "2022-08-14T01:58:28Z")
I am subscribing to this mystery. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/15 "2022-08-14T02:10:26Z")
Miss Beck was silent, but her expression told me that she was thinking. Finally, she spoke. “Maggie, my neighbor, is a grandmother. She loves her grandkids, and loves spoiling them. So she told me that her grandson was coming for the weekend. He’s five years old.” Miss Beck opened her purse and pulled out an engraved cigarette case. I was about to point out the “No Smoking” sign on the wall, until she extracted a breath mint. “Cigarette cases are good for more than just cigarettes,” she said. “You want one?” I declined. “Please continue, Miss Beck.” ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/16 "2022-08-14T03:17:24Z")
I do my last walk in the hallway and I met the Gramma. I said, “Sorry for your Teddybear loss.” She says “I don’t know what you mean” Ok now maybe I was wrong targeting Master Dennis the menace, so quick. I think Gramma may be up to something illegal. Bad Granny! There’s only one reason to open a Teddy so brutally. Something is hidden there. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/17 "2022-08-14T03:29:38Z")
“Something is hidden there,” said Miss Beck. That told me that something was missing–the link between the murder and the suspects. Suspects? Yes, because now there were two: Grandma and Dennis, the grandson. “Okay, Miss Beck, tell me what you think is hidden.” I leaned back in my chair, and waited. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 3:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/18 "2022-08-14T03:40:48Z")
Miss Beck took her time to answer. Meanwhile, I wondered. Did the bear contain jewels? Possibly, but what use would Dennis have for those? At age 5, he’d likely just think them shiny stones, and put them with his baby teeth, waiting for the Tooth Fairy. Cash? Both Dennis and Grandma would recognize that, but there’s only so my one can put into a teddy bear before it becomes misshapen. Drugs? I don’t even want to go there. “Miss Beck. I’m waiting.” ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/19 "2022-08-14T04:41:18Z")
Yes diamonds. Blood diamonds from the only Diamond Mine in this country. Murphreesboro, Ark. I reckon those cats are implicated is this. They like sparklies. ---
**Author:** ![Spoons](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spoons/32/3141_2.png) [@Spoons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spoons)\ **Post date:** [August 14, 2022, 4:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626/20 "2022-08-14T04:57:23Z")
“Diamonds,” said Miss Beck. It was diamonds in the bear." Made me wonder some more. “Miss Beck, I’ve got to look further.” I stood up. “Oh, you don’t need to investigate.” “Miss Beck, I do.” She gave me a look that could curdle milk. “Miss Beck, it’s time to look at the crime scene.” I opened the door. Miss Beck was still seated. “After you,” I offered. With a “Hmph,” she got up and followed. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-bad-bad-teddy-bear-murder-sherlock-beck-is-on-the-case-no-worries/969626.md?page=2)