# Bad Christian Bumper Stickers **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [September 25, 2000, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-christian-bumper-stickers/34478 "2000-09-25T17:04:18Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 10
**Author:** ![Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Tapioca\_Dextrin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tapioca_Dextrin)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2002, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-christian-bumper-stickers/34478/181 "2002-03-23T02:44:57Z")
Well my fave take on the fish thingy was one the read **CTHULU** instead of Darwin. And my current sig was taken from a church noticeboard somewhere on the LA/TX border ---
**Author:** ![Beardedcrow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a4c791/32.png) [@Beardedcrow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beardedcrow)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2002, 5:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-christian-bumper-stickers/34478/182 "2002-03-23T05:03:06Z")
I think all the Xtian bumper stickers are funnier when you add the phrase “With a Condom”. Jesus Saves, With a Condom. Real Men love Jesus With a Condom. When the Going gets Tough, The Tough turn to Jesus With a Condom. God is my Co-pilot With a Condom. By the way, Dobbs says those Chrome Fishes will be real Important, come the Rapture. The Regular Jesus will take the Xtians, the Chrome Jesus will pick up their Cars. They’ll be driving their Cars in Chrome Heaven! ---
**Author:** ![DoctorJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/doctorj/32/2904_2.png) [@DoctorJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DoctorJ)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2002, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-christian-bumper-stickers/34478/183 "2002-03-23T17:26:45Z")
[http://members.aol.com/JesusImages/imagesJPG/Surgeon.JPG](http://members.aol.com/JesusImages/imagesJPG/Surgeon.JPG) I guess if you’re the Son of God, the sterile field doesn’t apply to you. (What this picture really needs is a scrub nurse freaking out in the background. “Where’s your hat and mask! Get your hands off the field, you freak! Aaah!”) Dr. J ---
**Author:** ![mapsmith](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/848f3c/32.png) [@mapsmith](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mapsmith)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2002, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-christian-bumper-stickers/34478/184 "2002-03-23T17:30:59Z")
I have always said that the Bumper Stickers that simply say “Jesus” are there for you to know what to say when you see how bad a driver they are. ---
**Author:** ![red\_dragon60](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ce73a5/32.png) [@red\_dragon60](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/red_dragon60)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2002, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-christian-bumper-stickers/34478/185 "2002-03-23T18:36:13Z")
[http://members.aol.com/JesusImages/imagesJPG/Guitarist.JPG](http://members.aol.com/JesusImages/imagesJPG/Guitarist.JPG) Jesus looks like Ron Jeremy in this one. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Cheatem\_Undhow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/13edae/32.png) [@Dewey\_Cheatem\_Undhow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Cheatem_Undhow)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2002, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-christian-bumper-stickers/34478/186 "2002-03-23T20:32:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by red\_dragon60 \* > \*\*Jesus looks like Ron Jeremy in this one. \*\* Just what the world needs: a well-hung messiah. ---
**Author:** ![Pixiegrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/94ad74/32.png) [@Pixiegrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pixiegrrl)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2002, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-christian-bumper-stickers/34478/187 "2002-03-23T21:41:16Z")
This was my favorite **TRY JESUS FOR 30 DAYS. SATAN WILL ALWAYS TAKE YOU BACK** It’s a bad infomercial. ---
**Author:** ![erislover](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/71e660/32.png) [@erislover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/erislover)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2002, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-christian-bumper-stickers/34478/188 "2002-03-23T22:22:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Tattva \* > \*\* > > IIRC from my Spanish class, Yo quiero is more directly translated as “I want” or “I desire”. Amar is the verb for “to love”. \*\* I think it might be a regional thing. I learned that “quiero” would be used for standard expression of love, while “amo” would be much more… deep? Formal? Poetic? :shrug: Madonna would use “quiero” and Manilow would use “amo” or something. I have seen cheesy valentines which had a little frog with hearts around it saying, “Te quiero.” YMMV. ---
**Author:** ![5\_time\_champ](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/5/278dde/32.png) [@5\_time\_champ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5_time_champ)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2002, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-christian-bumper-stickers/34478/189 "2002-03-24T01:08:49Z")
Jesus saves. . . S & H Green Stamps I am surprised no one has mentioned this one. It is not a bumper sticker but-- A server in a restaurant walks up to the table after the guest has left. Along with, or sometimes in place of the tip there is a piece of paper that looks like a MasterCard. But it says “Give Christ charge of your life” ---
**Author:** ![Regina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/d78d45/32.png) [@Regina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Regina)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2002, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-christian-bumper-stickers/34478/190 "2002-03-24T01:11:58Z")
Oh goodie, this thread is still running and I get to make my first post. Hope I do this right. This isn’t a bumper sticker, but there is a sign on I-65 from Montgomery to Birmingham, Alabama, that says “Go to Church or the Devil Will Get You!” with a picture of a devil and a pitchfork. That sign has been there (with one short, mysterious hiatus) at least since I started driving, and it has never failed to crack me up. ---
**Author:** ![ElwoodCuse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/edb3f5/32.png) [@ElwoodCuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ElwoodCuse)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2002, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-christian-bumper-stickers/34478/191 "2002-03-24T01:53:01Z")
My Karma Ran Over My Dogma ---
**Author:** ![Ennui](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ennui/32/3396_2.png) [@Ennui](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ennui)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2002, 2:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-christian-bumper-stickers/34478/192 "2002-03-24T02:21:20Z")
I can’t believe we’ve gone four pages without mentioning (forgive me if I missed it): “To Get to Heaven : Turn Right and Go Straight.” :rolleyes: ---
**Author:** ![MsRobyn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/90ced4/32.png) [@MsRobyn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsRobyn)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2002, 4:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-christian-bumper-stickers/34478/193 "2002-03-24T04:23:32Z")
I saw one in a parking lot: Surprise! Your mother chose LIFE! No, you asshole. My mother had no choice. I was born prior to 1973, when Roe v. Wade was decided. As for me, I chose to be pregnant. So don’t tell me what’s going on, OK? Robin [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-christian-bumper-stickers/34478.md?page=9)