# Bad fake names. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [April 4, 2004, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214 "2004-04-04T19:04:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Lamia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Lamia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lamia)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2004, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/41 "2004-04-06T13:56:21Z")
> [@CandidGamera](#): > > That wouldn’t have been _Dharma and Greg_, would it? It sounds like a joke they’d do. Hmmm, I don’t think so. This was a _really_ long time ago, and I don’t think the show (whatever it was) lasted long. But since I can’t remember anything about it except this one scene, I could be wrong! ---
**Author:** ![Gunslinger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/4491bb/32.png) [@Gunslinger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gunslinger)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2004, 7:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/42 "2004-04-06T19:49:51Z")
I have several plausible pseudonyms prepared in case I need one. Everybody should. “Jack Brown” is my favorite obscure-reference fake name. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2004, 8:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/43 "2004-04-06T20:47:01Z")
A lot of my junk mail ends up addressed to Jacob Q. Allworthy, an alias I have used for decades. Lately I have been using Agamemnon P. Fuschtwanger. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Raymond\_Luxury\_Yacht](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raymond_luxury_yacht/32/4099_2.png) [@Raymond\_Luxury\_Yacht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raymond_Luxury_Yacht)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2004, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/44 "2004-04-06T21:23:11Z")
From an episode of _Taxi_, Elaine picks up a high school rival in her cab and says that she’s dating a great guy…named…Bill…Board. Later, Alex, acting as Bill Board, comments that his brothers Clip and Switch have it much worse. From _The Simpsons_, I submit Santos L. Halper. ---
**Author:** ![Balance](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ccd318/32.png) [@Balance](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Balance)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2004, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/45 "2004-04-06T21:24:54Z")
> [@Gunslinger](#): > > I have several plausible pseudonyms prepared in case I need one. Everybody should. > > “Jack Brown” is my favorite obscure-reference fake name. Precisely. It’s even better to have a sketchy history to go with some of the names. Fake documentation is nice, but good fakes are increasingly difficult to arrange. In my younger days, I passed myself off as “Richard Grayson” on several occasions. Fortunately, people apparently feel no impulse to refer to me by a nickname, so no one ever made the connection. I’ve retired the name, as I’m far past any age at which I could consider myself a “Boy Wonder”. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Feit\_C\_Taj](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/ee59a6/32.png) [@Feit\_C\_Taj](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Feit_C_Taj)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2004, 10:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/46 "2004-04-06T22:54:41Z")
Q Fluffy Windbreakers II 1/2. (Which is why Doktor Fluff is so much easier) ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [April 6, 2004, 11:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/47 "2004-04-06T23:56:14Z")
The Friends with Princess Consuela Banana-Hammock, what did her husband threaten to change his name to? Bag Of Crap or something like that? ---
**Author:** ![vl\_mungo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/bc8723/32.png) [@vl\_mungo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vl_mungo)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2004, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/48 "2004-04-07T00:02:20Z")
From **A Fish Called Wanda** … Mr. Manfredjinsinjin… from the CIA ---
**Author:** ![Bambi\_Hassenpfeffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Bambi\_Hassenpfeffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bambi_Hassenpfeffer)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2004, 12:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/49 "2004-04-07T00:02:21Z")
> [@Biggirl](#): > > The Friends with Princess Consuela Banana-Hammock, what did her husband threaten to change his name to? Bag Of Crap or something like that? “Crap Bag”. She in fact had to introduce him as such to someone before she consented to changing her name back to Phoebe. I didn’t know black people watched _Friends_. They certainly don’t appear in it. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2004, 12:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/50 "2004-04-07T00:30:27Z")
I’ve been using the fake name **Abijah T Bindersnatch** for different things for about 20 years now. ---
**Author:** ![buns3000](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c89c15/32.png) [@buns3000](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buns3000)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2004, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/51 "2004-04-07T00:37:14Z")
Fred Phillips is the fake name I opt for - generally only on the internet. In terms of the OP, its beauty is it so obviously fake, real people with this name notwithstanding. Evidently, I am the only poster to this thread who know a real-life Bill Carr… ---
**Author:** ![verbenabeast](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/c4cdca/32.png) [@verbenabeast](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/verbenabeast)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2004, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/52 "2004-04-07T01:02:04Z")
I friend of mine and I used the name Aloyishus Andronicus Andromedus in high school… nobody ever bought it… I can’t imagine why ---
**Author:** ![EllisDee](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ellisdee/32/4531_2.png) [@EllisDee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/EllisDee)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2004, 1:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/53 "2004-04-07T01:23:46Z")
> [@buns3000](#): > > Fred Phillips is the fake name I opt for - generally only on the internet. In terms of the OP, its beauty is it so obviously fake, real people with this name notwithstanding. > > Evidently, I am the only poster to this thread who know a real-life Bill Carr… David Carr is an instantly recognizable name to any NFL fan, seeing as he was the #1 overall pick in the draft for the expansion Houston Texans, and continues to be their franchise QB. ---
**Author:** ![Brainiac4](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/brainiac4/32/3534_2.png) [@Brainiac4](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Brainiac4)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2004, 1:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/54 "2004-04-07T01:45:36Z")
In “The Tick vs. Pineapple Pokopo” episode (of the cartoon version, thank you very much), The Tick, Arthur and American Maid go undercover in Pokoponesia. The Tick falls asleep during the briefing (“Sideshow… boring… losing… consciousness…”) and so is less prepared than might be desired. When checking into the hotel in Pokoponesia, Tick is asked his name. He’s prepared with “Nick” but when asked for a last name, he panics. “Nobody said anything about last names!” He then comes up with “Nick… Soapdish.” Desk Clerk: “What kind of a name is that?” Tick, bravely: “It’s French!” Desk Clerk “Really? It sounds _made up_ to me!” Bwa ha ha! ---
**Author:** ![mouthbreather](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a698b9/32.png) [@mouthbreather](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mouthbreather)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2004, 6:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/55 "2004-04-07T06:01:08Z")
Lance Uppercut ---
**Author:** ![Odinoneeye](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/97f17d/32.png) [@Odinoneeye](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Odinoneeye)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2004, 7:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/56 "2004-04-07T07:37:38Z")
On _That 70s Show_, there’s a scene where Fez is trying to get advice from Kitty on his first sexual encounter. He says it’s about his friend Johnny… (looking around) Table. The funniest part is when he can’t remember the name and Kitty has to point to the table to remind him. And in the movie _Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure_, Bill is introducing the historical figures to his stepmom and making up names for them to hide their identities. Not being very creative, he comes up with Socrates Johnson and Bob Genghis Khan. Finally, he runs out of ideas and finshes with Abraham Lincoln. ---
**Author:** ![Beauty\_Personified](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e480ec/32.png) [@Beauty\_Personified](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beauty_Personified)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2004, 10:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/57 "2004-04-07T10:38:04Z")
For some people, it might not be a good idea to reveal fake names they’ve used in the past on these boards. And it might not be a good idea to post fake names you are currently using or seriously intend to use in the future. I’m just saying… 😉 That said \*, at times when I’ve not wanted to use my legal name - in a public forum, for correspondence, or online - I’ve often used my birth name - Todd Matchett. Not many people really know that I wasn’t born with the name I have now. Well, not many people used to know. 😉 Someone in an earlier post mentioned someone using the name “Cindy Crawford” as an alias, and someone else not recognizing the name being that of a celebrity’s. I just have one question. Which celebrity Cindy Crawford were you alluding to? The model/actress Cindy Crawford, or the porn-star Cindy Crawford? - (Yes, I realize I say “that said” quite a bit.) Anyhoo… ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2004, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/58 "2004-04-07T13:31:32Z")
> [@Beauty Personified](#): > > For some people, it might not be a good idea to reveal fake names they’ve used in the past on these boards. And it might not be a good idea to post fake names you are currently using or seriously intend to use in the future. > > I’m just saying… 😉 Just FYI, in case you (or any others reading this) don’t know, socks are forbidden on this board. Your buddy, Snakepuppy Jones ---
**Author:** ![DaToad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/67e7ee/32.png) [@DaToad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DaToad)\ **Post date:** [April 7, 2004, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/59 "2004-04-07T19:45:59Z")
I always thought Remo Williams takes first prize for worst fake name. “REMO WILLIAMS is an above-average thriller, offering a fresh hero based on “The Destroyer” series of novels (at least 120 of which are currently available). A New York City cop finds himself shanghaied by a group of American secret agents led by Harold Smith and given a new face and identity. Now known as Remo Williams (the name was taken from a bedpan in a hospital that read “The Williams Company of Remo, Arkansas”), the new agent is placed under the tutelage of a persnickety Korean martial arts expert, Chiun…” ---
**Author:** ![tornapart1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b5e925/32.png) [@tornapart1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tornapart1)\ **Post date:** [April 8, 2004, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214/60 "2004-04-08T00:10:54Z")
how about on the simpsons when homer changed his name to Max Power [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-fake-names/238214.md?page=4)