# Bad Santa (2003) **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Tags:** movies\ **Created:** [December 14, 2023, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611 "2023-12-14T18:13:00Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![DCnDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dcndc/32/2842_2.png) [@DCnDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DCnDC)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 6:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/1 "2023-12-14T18:13:00Z")
I don’t know about you, but I _love_ this movie. I love it more than I love **A Christmas Story**. I love it more than I love **Christmas Vacation** or **Die Hard**. Someday I’ll get tired of those movies. This one will forever remain fresh. Apparently Brett Kelly, who played Thurman Merman (and was 8 years old at the time) has had a nice little career, but as far as I’m concerned this is his masterpiece. He was _brilliant_. He deserved an award just for the checkers “Wanna play again?” scene. Shit happens when you party naked. Should I fix you some sandwiches? Christmas time we get the shit, because we are men, and Lois. Marcus: Willie, this has been a long time coming. Every year, you’re worse. Every year, you’re less reliable. More booze, more bullshit, more buttfuckin’. Willie: Sure, the “three B’s” You ain’t gonna shit right for a week! ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/2 "2023-12-14T18:15:12Z")
“Well, they can’t all be winners, kid” ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/3 "2023-12-14T18:23:22Z")
_“I’ve never Fornicated anybody!”_ ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 6:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/4 "2023-12-14T18:49:01Z")
It’s one of my favorite Christmas traditions, watching it with a bottle of Old Grandad. “I can’t help it, the guy makes me uneasy.” “Well sure, Santa fucking someone in the ass.” ---
**Author:** ![Beckdawrek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/beckdawrek/32/3647_2.png) [@Beckdawrek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beckdawrek)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 6:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/5 "2023-12-14T18:55:43Z")
It’s actually kind of a touching movie. But the belly laughs will hurt, in the end(oof, I didn’t say that) Bad Santa 2 is not on the mark. There are a few good lines in there. But it’s mostly disappointing. I would have never watched the first one without encouragement. It’s not my usual movie choice type. I was surprised how fun it was. I will never, ever, for the whole of my life watch “A Christmas Story” again. My kids loved it. We had to watch it so much when they were young it sickens me to even see that kids face. ---
**Author:** ![Gatopescado](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gatopescado/32/5711_2.png) [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/6 "2023-12-14T19:35:43Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > I would have never watched the first one without encouragement. Bayliss is such a bad bad bad influence! ---
**Author:** ![Stephe96](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bbe5ce/32.png) [@Stephe96](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stephe96)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 7:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/7 "2023-12-14T19:36:34Z")
“Haaaalf.” ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/8 "2023-12-14T19:59:38Z")
“How’d you get sick?” “I loved a woman that wasn’t clean.” “Mrs. Santa?” “No, it was her sister.” ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/9 "2023-12-14T20:13:28Z")
One of my few Christmas traditions: get hammered watching this movie. My favorite scene, though, is - to me - quite touching (not in the “back off, Santa!” sort of touching way) and somehow best of all, there’s zero dialogue. It’s just a bedraggled Santa, dragging himself down the sidewalk, but damn if he isn’t gonna light those @#$! candelabras. Slowly shuffling along with his lighter … … and accidentally sets one on fire, and has to wearily stomp it out. You can’t _hear_ any cursing, yet somehow, it’s definitely there. ---
**Author:** ![SwissMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e79b87/32.png) [@SwissMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwissMan)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 8:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/10 "2023-12-14T20:24:59Z")
Chipeska: “Oh, no, this is not a handicapped thing! I have nothing against you people!” Willie (mock outrage): “You people? Didya hear that Marcus? He said ‘you people’” Marcus: “Who the hell is us people?” Also love Willie’s utterly contemptuous “you’re pathetic” as he takes a candy cane at the end of that scene. ---
**Author:** ![joebuck20](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/74df32/32.png) [@joebuck20](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/joebuck20)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/11 "2023-12-14T20:32:08Z")
> [@muldoonthief](#): > > It’s one of my favorite Christmas traditions, watching it with a bottle of Old Grandad. > > “I can’t help it, the guy makes me uneasy.” > “Well sure, Santa fucking someone in the ass.” John Ritter is also brilliant in this. His facial expressions during this scene never fail to make me laugh my ass off. ---
**Author:** ![TreacherousCretin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treacherouscretin/32/476_2.png) [@TreacherousCretin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TreacherousCretin)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 8:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/12 "2023-12-14T20:36:06Z")
Since we’re all being so brave and honest I’ll also admit to loving this movie. And me too regarding John Ritter’s performance. ---
**Author:** ![Sherrerd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sherrerd/32/8_2.png) [@Sherrerd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sherrerd)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 8:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/13 "2023-12-14T20:42:01Z")
> [@Beckdawrek](#): > > It’s actually kind of a touching movie. I agree. I like the movie, though perhaps not as much as some in the thread do. It’s got a real humanity. And the jokes pretty much all land. (The kid is great, as some have said.) I always wonder if the makers were inspired by Dan Ackroyd’s “eating his Santa beard along with the smoked salmon he stole” scene in _Trading Places_. ---
**Author:** ![muldoonthief](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/muldoonthief/32/3188_2.png) [@muldoonthief](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/muldoonthief)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 9:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/14 "2023-12-14T21:04:14Z")
It’s so sad now watching those John Ritter & Bernie Mac scenes knowing they’ve both gone to that great mall security office in the sky. ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/15 "2023-12-14T21:32:44Z")
“I’m on my f\*cking lunch break, ok?!” ---
**Author:** ![SuntanLotion](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suntanlotion/32/16165_2.png) [@SuntanLotion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuntanLotion)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/16 "2023-12-14T21:54:42Z")
Love the movie! Normal fingers, not the fat…sausage fingers. Are you off your meds? Yes, but that is not what this is about. Oh Granny. ---
**Author:** ![SwissMan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e79b87/32.png) [@SwissMan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SwissMan)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 10:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/17 "2023-12-14T22:06:14Z")
Also love the very subtle running gag that Bernie Mac’s character is suffering from constipation. ---
**Author:** ![DCnDC](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dcndc/32/2842_2.png) [@DCnDC](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DCnDC)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/18 "2023-12-14T22:12:45Z")
I always found something mildly disturbing about the way Bernie Mac is eating that orange in that first scene with him and Ritter. ---
**Author:** ![madmonk28](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/madmonk28/32/20811_2.png) [@madmonk28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/madmonk28)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2023, 11:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/19 "2023-12-14T23:24:05Z")
It’s my favorite Christmas movie. Actually, its the only Christmas movie I like. ---
**Author:** ![Spice\_Weasel](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spice_weasel/32/5435_2.png) [@Spice\_Weasel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spice_Weasel)\ **Post date:** [December 16, 2023, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611/20 "2023-12-16T01:03:06Z")
So, I have never seen this movie. I suppose I oughta correct that. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bad-santa-2003/994611.md?page=2)