# Baker's Dozen II (Part 1)

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938>\
**Category:** Thread Games\
**Created:** [January 25, 2020, 3:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938 "2020-01-25T03:38:46Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 20\
**Page:** 421

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Bicycle\_Bill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bicycle_bill/32/6208_2.png) [@Bicycle\_Bill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bicycle_Bill)\
**Post date:** [January 25, 2022, 8:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8404 "2022-01-25T20:32:22Z")

</div>

**Shakespearean insults**

1. Your brain is as dry as the remainder biscuit after voyage - _As You Like It_
2. Never hung poison on a fouler toad. Out of my sight! thou dost infect my eyes. _Richard III_
3. There’s no more faith in thee than in a stewed prune. - _Henry IV_ , Part 1
4. He has not so much brain as ear-wax. - _Troilus and Cressida_
5. This woman’s an easy glove, my lord, she goes off and on at pleasure. – _All’s Well That Ends Well_

_ **-“BB”-** _

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Skunkdog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c2a13f/32.png) [@Skunkdog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skunkdog)\
**Post date:** [January 25, 2022, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8405 "2022-01-25T21:43:20Z")

</div>

**Shakespearean insults**

1. Your brain is as dry as the remainder biscuit after voyage - _As You Like It_
2. Never hung poison on a fouler toad. Out of my sight! thou dost infect my eyes. _Richard III_
3. There’s no more faith in thee than in a stewed prune. - _Henry IV_ , Part 1
4. He has not so much brain as ear-wax. - _Troilus and Cressida_
5. This woman’s an easy glove, my lord, she goes off and on at pleasure. – _All’s Well That Ends Well_
6. That trunk of humours, that bolting-hutch of beastliness, that swollen parcel of dropsies, that huge bombard of sack, that stuffed cloak-bag of guts, that roasted Manningtree ox with pudding in his belly, that reverend vice, that grey Iniquity, that father ruffian, that vanity in years? - _Henry IV, Part 1_

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Bayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bayaker/32/3454_2.png) [@Bayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bayaker)\
**Post date:** [January 25, 2022, 10:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8406 "2022-01-25T22:23:10Z")

</div>

**Shakespearean insults**

1. Your brain is as dry as the remainder biscuit after voyage - _As You Like It_
2. Never hung poison on a fouler toad. Out of my sight! thou dost infect my eyes. _Richard III_
3. There’s no more faith in thee than in a stewed prune. - _Henry IV_ , Part 1
4. He has not so much brain as ear-wax. - _Troilus and Cressida_
5. This woman’s an easy glove, my lord, she goes off and on at pleasure. - _All’s Well That Ends Well_
6. That trunk of humours, that bolting-hutch of beastliness, that swollen parcel of dropsies, that huge bombard of sack, that stuffed cloak-bag of guts, that roasted Manningtree ox with pudding in his belly, that reverend vice, that grey Iniquity, that father ruffian, that vanity in years? - _Henry IV, Part 1_
7. Would thou wert clean enough to spit upon - _Timon of Athens_

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![gkster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gkster/32/14107_2.png) [@gkster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gkster)\
**Post date:** [January 25, 2022, 11:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8407 "2022-01-25T23:38:47Z")

</div>

**Shakespearean insults**

1. Your brain is as dry as the remainder biscuit after voyage - _As You Like It_
2. Never hung poison on a fouler toad. Out of my sight! thou dost infect my eyes. _Richard III_
3. There’s no more faith in thee than in a stewed prune. - _Henry IV_ , Part 1
4. He has not so much brain as ear-wax. - _Troilus and Cressida_
5. This woman’s an easy glove, my lord, she goes off and on at pleasure. - _All’s Well That Ends Well_
6. That trunk of humours, that bolting-hutch of beastliness, that swollen parcel of dropsies, that huge bombard of sack, that stuffed cloak-bag of guts, that roasted Manningtree ox with pudding in his belly, that reverend vice, that grey Iniquity, that father ruffian, that vanity in years? - _Henry IV, Part 1_
7. Would thou wert clean enough to spit upon - _Timon of Athens_
8. Thou elvish-mark’d, abortive, rooting hog! - _Richard III_

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\
**Post date:** [January 26, 2022, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8408 "2022-01-26T14:25:59Z")

</div>

**Shakespearean insults**

1. Your brain is as dry as the remainder biscuit after voyage - _As You Like It_
2. Never hung poison on a fouler toad. Out of my sight! thou dost infect my eyes. _Richard III_
3. There’s no more faith in thee than in a stewed prune. - _Henry IV_ , Part 1
4. He has not so much brain as ear-wax. - _Troilus and Cressida_
5. This woman’s an easy glove, my lord, she goes off and on at pleasure. - _All’s Well That Ends Well_
6. That trunk of humours, that bolting-hutch of beastliness, that swollen parcel of dropsies, that huge bombard of sack, that stuffed cloak-bag of guts, that roasted Manningtree ox with pudding in his belly, that reverend vice, that grey Iniquity, that father ruffian, that vanity in years? - _Henry IV, Part 1_
7. Would thou wert clean enough to spit upon - _Timon of Athens_
8. Thou elvish-mark’d, abortive, rooting hog! - _Richard III_
9. Her face is not worth sunburning. - _Henry V_

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\
**Post date:** [January 26, 2022, 2:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8409 "2022-01-26T14:48:47Z")

</div>

**Shakespearean insults**

1. Your brain is as dry as the remainder biscuit after voyage - _As You Like It_
2. Never hung poison on a fouler toad. Out of my sight! thou dost infect my eyes. _Richard III_
3. There’s no more faith in thee than in a stewed prune. - _Henry IV_ , Part 1
4. He has not so much brain as ear-wax. - _Troilus and Cressida_
5. This woman’s an easy glove, my lord, she goes off and on at pleasure. - _All’s Well That Ends Well_
6. That trunk of humours, that bolting-hutch of beastliness, that swollen parcel of dropsies, that huge bombard of sack, that stuffed cloak-bag of guts, that roasted Manningtree ox with pudding in his belly, that reverend vice, that grey Iniquity, that father ruffian, that vanity in years? - _Henry IV, Part 1_
7. Would thou wert clean enough to spit upon - _Timon of Athens_
8. Thou elvish-mark’d, abortive, rooting hog! - _Richard III_
9. Her face is not worth sunburning. - _Henry V_
10. The tartness of his face sours ripe grapes. - _The Comedy of Errors_

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![gkster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gkster/32/14107_2.png) [@gkster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gkster)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2022, 1:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8410 "2022-01-27T01:02:01Z")

</div>

**Shakespearean insults**

1. Your brain is as dry as the remainder biscuit after voyage - _As You Like It_
2. Never hung poison on a fouler toad. Out of my sight! thou dost infect my eyes. _Richard III_
3. There’s no more faith in thee than in a stewed prune. - _Henry IV_ , Part 1
4. He has not so much brain as ear-wax. - _Troilus and Cressida_
5. This woman’s an easy glove, my lord, she goes off and on at pleasure. - _All’s Well That Ends Well_
6. That trunk of humours, that bolting-hutch of beastliness, that swollen parcel of dropsies, that huge bombard of sack, that stuffed cloak-bag of guts, that roasted Manningtree ox with pudding in his belly, that reverend vice, that grey Iniquity, that father ruffian, that vanity in years? - _Henry IV, Part 1_
7. Would thou wert clean enough to spit upon - _Timon of Athens_
8. Thou elvish-mark’d, abortive, rooting hog! - _Richard III_
9. Her face is not worth sunburning. - _Henry V_
10. The tartness of his face sours ripe grapes. - _The Comedy of Errors_
11. a lily-liver’d, action-taking, whoreson, glass-gazing, superserviceable, finical rogue - _King Lear_

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Cardigan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cardigan/32/187_2.png) [@Cardigan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cardigan)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2022, 2:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8411 "2022-01-27T14:32:37Z")

</div>

**Shakespearean insults**

1. Your brain is as dry as the remainder biscuit after voyage - _As You Like It_
2. Never hung poison on a fouler toad. Out of my sight! thou dost infect my eyes. _Richard III_
3. There’s no more faith in thee than in a stewed prune. - _Henry IV_ , Part 1
4. He has not so much brain as ear-wax. - _Troilus and Cressida_
5. This woman’s an easy glove, my lord, she goes off and on at pleasure. - _All’s Well That Ends Well_
6. That trunk of humours, that bolting-hutch of beastliness, that swollen parcel of dropsies, that huge bombard of sack, that stuffed cloak-bag of guts, that roasted Manningtree ox with pudding in his belly, that reverend vice, that grey Iniquity, that father ruffian, that vanity in years? - _Henry IV, Part 1_
7. Would thou wert clean enough to spit upon - _Timon of Athens_
8. Thou elvish-mark’d, abortive, rooting hog! - _Richard III_
9. Her face is not worth sunburning. - _Henry V_
10. The tartness of his face sours ripe grapes. - _The Comedy of Errors_
11. a lily-liver’d, action-taking, whoreson, glass-gazing, superserviceable, finical rogue - _King Lear_
12. Villain, I have done thy mother. _Titus Andronicus_

the original ‘yo momma’ insult

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2022, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8412 "2022-01-27T19:08:48Z")

</div>

[quote=“Cardigan, post:8411, topic:846938, full:true”]  
**Shakespearean insults**

1. Your brain is as dry as the remainder biscuit after voyage - _As You Like It_
2. Never hung poison on a fouler toad. Out of my sight! thou dost infect my eyes. _Richard III_
3. There’s no more faith in thee than in a stewed prune. - _Henry IV_ , Part 1
4. He has not so much brain as ear-wax. - _Troilus and Cressida_
5. This woman’s an easy glove, my lord, she goes off and on at pleasure. - _All’s Well That Ends Well_
6. That trunk of humours, that bolting-hutch of beastliness, that swollen parcel of dropsies, that huge bombard of sack, that stuffed cloak-bag of guts, that roasted Manningtree ox with pudding in his belly, that reverend vice, that grey Iniquity, that father ruffian, that vanity in years? - _Henry IV, Part 1_
7. Would thou wert clean enough to spit upon - _Timon of Athens_
8. Thou elvish-mark’d, abortive, rooting hog! - _Richard III_
9. Her face is not worth sunburning. - _Henry V_
10. The tartness of his face sours ripe grapes. - _The Comedy of Errors_
11. a lily-liver’d, action-taking, whoreson, glass-gazing, superserviceable, finical rogue - _King Lear_
12. Villain, I have done thy mother - _Titus Andronicus_
13. His wit’s as thick as a Tewkesbury mustard - _Henry IV, Part 2_

Next up:

**Heard around the White House lately**

1. “This isn’t nearly as much fun as _The West Wing_ made it look.”

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Skunkdog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c2a13f/32.png) [@Skunkdog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skunkdog)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2022, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8413 "2022-01-27T22:30:31Z")

</div>

**Heard around the White House lately**

1. “This isn’t nearly as much fun as _The West Wing_ made it look.”
2. “Why shouldn’t I call him a stupid son of a bitch? He is one.”

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\
**Post date:** [January 27, 2022, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8414 "2022-01-27T23:10:45Z")

</div>

**Heard around the White House lately**

1. “This isn’t nearly as much fun as _The West Wing_ made it look.”
2. “Why shouldn’t I call him a stupid son of a bitch? He is one.”
3. “Uh, why is a black female candidate for the Supreme Court intrinsically a far-left radical?”

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\
**Post date:** [January 28, 2022, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8415 "2022-01-28T01:10:40Z")

</div>

**Heard around the White House lately**

1. “This isn’t nearly as much fun as _The West Wing_ made it look.”
2. “Why shouldn’t I call him a stupid son of a bitch? He is one.”
3. “Uh, why is a black female candidate for the Supreme Court intrinsically a far-left radical?”
4. “How can we make one of the Rightwing justices retire? Turn one of _them_ into a black woman!”

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![gkster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gkster/32/14107_2.png) [@gkster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gkster)\
**Post date:** [January 28, 2022, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8416 "2022-01-28T01:28:27Z")

</div>

**Heard around the White House lately**

1. “This isn’t nearly as much fun as _The West Wing_ made it look.”
2. “Why shouldn’t I call him a stupid son of a bitch? He is one.”
3. “Uh, why is a black female candidate for the Supreme Court intrinsically a far-left radical?”
4. “How can we make one of the Rightwing justices retire? Turn one of _them_ into a black woman!”
5. “Commander, good dog! Don’t bite unless you want to get re-homed!”

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\
**Post date:** [January 28, 2022, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8417 "2022-01-28T16:16:07Z")

</div>

**Heard around the White House lately**

1. “This isn’t nearly as much fun as _The West Wing_ made it look.”
2. “Why shouldn’t I call him a stupid son of a bitch? He is one.”
3. “Uh, why is a black female candidate for the Supreme Court intrinsically a far-left radical?”
4. “How can we make one of the Rightwing justices retire? Turn one of _them_ into a black woman!”
5. “Commander, good dog! Don’t bite unless you want to get re-homed!”
6. “I hear the January 6th Commission’s going after Rupert Murdoch next.”

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\
**Post date:** [January 28, 2022, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8418 "2022-01-28T18:00:39Z")

</div>

**Heard around the White House lately**

1. “This isn’t nearly as much fun as _The West Wing_ made it look.”
2. “Why shouldn’t I call him a stupid son of a bitch? He is one.”
3. “Uh, why is a black female candidate for the Supreme Court intrinsically a far-left radical?”
4. “How can we make one of the Rightwing justices retire? Turn one of _them_ into a black woman!”
5. “Commander, good dog! Don’t bite unless you want to get re-homed!”
6. “I hear the January 6th Commission’s going after Rupert Murdoch next.”
7. “Aww, nice kitteh!”

> **[Bidens welcome new family cat to the White House | CNN Politics](https://www.cnn.com/2022/01/28/politics/biden-family-cat-willow/index.html)**
>
> First lady Jill Biden has revealed the long-awaited Biden family cat.

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\
**Post date:** [January 29, 2022, 11:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8419 "2022-01-29T11:47:23Z")

</div>

**Heard around the White House lately**

1. “This isn’t nearly as much fun as _The West Wing_ made it look.”
2. “Why shouldn’t I call him a stupid son of a bitch? He is one.”
3. “Uh, why is a black female candidate for the Supreme Court intrinsically a far-left radical?”
4. “How can we make one of the Rightwing justices retire? Turn one of _them_ into a black woman!”
5. “Commander, good dog! Don’t bite unless you want to get re-homed!”
6. “I hear the January 6th Commission’s going after Rupert Murdoch next.”
7. “Aww, nice kitteh!”
8. “Meow!”

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\
**Post date:** [January 29, 2022, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8420 "2022-01-29T14:31:25Z")

</div>

**Heard around the White House lately**

1. “This isn’t nearly as much fun as _The West Wing_ made it look.”
2. “Why shouldn’t I call him a stupid son of a bitch? He is one.”
3. “Uh, why is a black female candidate for the Supreme Court intrinsically a far-left radical?”
4. “How can we make one of the Rightwing justices retire? Turn one of _them_ into a black woman!”
5. “Commander, good dog! Don’t bite unless you want to get re-homed!”
6. “I hear the January 6th Commission’s going after Rupert Murdoch next.”
7. “Aww, nice kitteh!”
8. “Meow!”
9. “If Joe puts Manchin on the Supreme Court, maybe the Democrats can pass something.”

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![gkster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gkster/32/14107_2.png) [@gkster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gkster)\
**Post date:** [January 29, 2022, 10:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8421 "2022-01-29T22:50:20Z")

</div>

**Heard around the White House lately**

1. “This isn’t nearly as much fun as _The West Wing_ made it look.”
2. “Why shouldn’t I call him a stupid son of a bitch? He is one.”
3. “Uh, why is a black female candidate for the Supreme Court intrinsically a far-left radical?”
4. “How can we make one of the Rightwing justices retire? Turn one of _them_ into a black woman!”
5. “Commander, good dog! Don’t bite unless you want to get re-homed!”
6. “I hear the January 6th Commission’s going after Rupert Murdoch next.”
7. “Aww, nice kitteh!”
8. “Meow!”
9. “If Joe puts Manchin on the Supreme Court, maybe the Democrats can pass something.”
10. “It’s freezing! Who’s taking Commander for his walk?”

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Skunkdog](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c2a13f/32.png) [@Skunkdog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skunkdog)\
**Post date:** [January 30, 2022, 3:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8422 "2022-01-30T03:35:17Z")

</div>

**Heard around the White House lately**

1. “This isn’t nearly as much fun as _The West Wing_ made it look.”
2. “Why shouldn’t I call him a stupid son of a bitch? He is one.”
3. “Uh, why is a black female candidate for the Supreme Court intrinsically a far-left radical?”
4. “How can we make one of the Rightwing justices retire? Turn one of _them_ into a black woman!”
5. “Commander, good dog! Don’t bite unless you want to get re-homed!”
6. “I hear the January 6th Commission’s going after Rupert Murdoch next.”
7. “Aww, nice kitteh!”
8. “Meow!”
9. “If Joe puts Manchin on the Supreme Court, maybe the Democrats can pass something.”
10. “It’s freezing! Who’s taking Commander for his walk?”
11. “It could be worse. You could have Kamala’s numbers”

---

<div class="post-metadata">

**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\
**Post date:** [January 30, 2022, 1:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen-ii-part-1/846938/8423 "2022-01-30T13:34:16Z")

</div>

**Heard around the White House lately**

1. “This isn’t nearly as much fun as _The West Wing_ made it look.”
2. “Why shouldn’t I call him a stupid son of a bitch? He is one.”
3. “Uh, why is a black female candidate for the Supreme Court intrinsically a far-left radical?”
4. “How can we make one of the Rightwing justices retire? Turn one of _them_ into a black woman!”
5. “Commander, good dog! Don’t bite unless you want to get re-homed!”
6. “I hear the January 6th Commission’s going after Rupert Murdoch next.”
7. “Aww, nice kitteh!”
8. “Meow!”
9. “If Joe puts Manchin on the Supreme Court, maybe the Democrats can pass something.”
10. “It’s freezing! Who’s taking Commander for his walk?”
11. “It could be worse. You could have Kamala’s numbers”
12. “I am the freaking Vice President of the United States! I am not taking Commander for his walk. Again.”

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