# Bakers Dozen **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [August 4, 2010, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173 "2010-08-04T17:56:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1738
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2015, 8:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34744 "2015-05-10T20:03:47Z")
Fairy Tales/Fables for a more modern generation of kids 1. Little Red, Ridin’ in da Hood 2. Sleeping Beauty is Smart, Strong, and Perfectly Capable of Leading a Rewarding, Fulfilling Life On Her Own Without Waiting for Some Damn Prince Charming to Come Wake Her With a Kiss 3. Snow White and the Seven Height-Challenged People 4. Hansel and Gretel, Two Little Aryan Brats Who Oppressed and Murdered a Wiccan, Then Stole Her House 5. Three Appropriately-Sized Pigs and the Big Bad Wolf’s Sequential Home Invasions 6. Rastalocks and the Three Joints 7. The Little Boy Who Cried “Mr. Sandusky” ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2015, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34745 "2015-05-10T22:57:55Z")
Fairy Tales/Fables for a more modern generation of kids 1. Little Red, Ridin’ in da Hood 2. Sleeping Beauty is Smart, Strong, and Perfectly Capable of Leading a Rewarding, Fulfilling Life On Her Own Without Waiting for Some Damn Prince Charming to Come Wake Her With a Kiss 3. Snow White and the Seven Height-Challenged People 4. Hansel and Gretel, Two Little Aryan Brats Who Oppressed and Murdered a Wiccan, Then Stole Her House 5. Three Appropriately-Sized Pigs and the Big Bad Wolf’s Sequential Home Invasions 6. Rastalocks and the Three Joints 7. The Little Boy Who Cried “Mr. Sandusky” 8. The Little Transhuman - The story of Ariel, a young person who identified as a human but was born in a mermaid’s body. ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2015, 11:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34746 "2015-05-10T23:03:12Z")
Fairy Tales/Fables for a more modern generation of kids 1. Little Red, Ridin’ in da Hood 2. Sleeping Beauty is Smart, Strong, and Perfectly Capable of Leading a Rewarding, Fulfilling Life On Her Own Without Waiting for Some Damn Prince Charming to Come Wake Her With a Kiss 3. Snow White and the Seven Height-Challenged People 4. Hansel and Gretel, Two Little Aryan Brats Who Oppressed and Murdered a Wiccan, Then Stole Her House 5. Three Appropriately-Sized Pigs and the Big Bad Wolf’s Sequential Home Invasions 6. Rastalocks and the Three Joints 7. The Little Boy Who Cried “Mr. Sandusky” 8. The Little Transhuman - The story of Ariel, a young person who identified as a human but was born in a mermaid’s body. 9. Rumpleforeskin, a cautionary tale about botched circumcision ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2015, 11:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34747 "2015-05-10T23:09:49Z")
Fairy Tales/Fables for a more modern generation of kids 1. Little Red, Ridin’ in da Hood 2. Sleeping Beauty is Smart, Strong, and Perfectly Capable of Leading a Rewarding, Fulfilling Life On Her Own Without Waiting for Some Damn Prince Charming to Come Wake Her With a Kiss 3. Snow White and the Seven Height-Challenged People 4. Hansel and Gretel, Two Little Aryan Brats Who Oppressed and Murdered a Wiccan, Then Stole Her House 5. Three Appropriately-Sized Pigs and the Big Bad Wolf’s Sequential Home Invasions 6. Rastalocks and the Three Joints 7. The Little Boy Who Cried “Mr. Sandusky” 8. The Little Transhuman - The story of Ariel, a young person who identified as a human but was born in a mermaid’s body. 9. Rumpleforeskin, a cautionary tale about botched circumcision 10. The Lion Prime Minister ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2015, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34748 "2015-05-11T01:57:26Z")
Fairy Tales/Fables for a more modern generation of kids 1. Little Red, Ridin’ in da Hood 2. Sleeping Beauty is Smart, Strong, and Perfectly Capable of Leading a Rewarding, Fulfilling Life On Her Own Without Waiting for Some Damn Prince Charming to Come Wake Her With a Kiss 3. Snow White and the Seven Height-Challenged People 4. Hansel and Gretel, Two Little Aryan Brats Who Oppressed and Murdered a Wiccan, Then Stole Her House 5. Three Appropriately-Sized Pigs and the Big Bad Wolf’s Sequential Home Invasions 6. Rastalocks and the Three Joints 7. The Little Boy Who Cried “Mr. Sandusky” 8. The Little Transhuman - The story of Ariel, a young person who identified as a human but was born in a mermaid’s body. 9. Rumpleforeskin, a cautionary tale about botched circumcision 10. The Lion Prime Minister 11. The Princess and the Peanut Allergy ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2015, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34749 "2015-05-11T04:05:43Z")
Fairy Tales/Fables for a more modern generation of kids 1. Little Red, Ridin’ in da Hood 2. Sleeping Beauty is Smart, Strong, and Perfectly Capable of Leading a Rewarding, Fulfilling Life On Her Own Without Waiting for Some Damn Prince Charming to Come Wake Her With a Kiss 3. Snow White and the Seven Height-Challenged People 4. Hansel and Gretel, Two Little Aryan Brats Who Oppressed and Murdered a Wiccan, Then Stole Her House 5. Three Appropriately-Sized Pigs and the Big Bad Wolf’s Sequential Home Invasions 6. Rastalocks and the Three Joints 7. The Little Boy Who Cried “Mr. Sandusky” 8. The Little Transhuman - The story of Ariel, a young person who identified as a human but was born in a mermaid’s body. 9. Rumpleforeskin, a cautionary tale about botched circumcision 10. The Lion Prime Minister 11. The Princess and the Peanut Allergy 12. The Three Nanny Goats Gruff ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2015, 4:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34750 "2015-05-11T04:53:52Z")
Fairy Tales/Fables for a more modern generation of kids 1. Little Red, Ridin’ in da Hood 2. Sleeping Beauty is Smart, Strong, and Perfectly Capable of Leading a Rewarding, Fulfilling Life On Her Own Without Waiting for Some Damn Prince Charming to Come Wake Her With a Kiss 3. Snow White and the Seven Height-Challenged People 4. Hansel and Gretel, Two Little Aryan Brats Who Oppressed and Murdered a Wiccan, Then Stole Her House 5. Three Appropriately-Sized Pigs and the Big Bad Wolf’s Sequential Home Invasions 6. Rastalocks and the Three Joints 7. The Little Boy Who Cried “Mr. Sandusky” 8. The Little Transhuman - The story of Ariel, a young person who identified as a human but was born in a mermaid’s body. 9. Rumpleforeskin, a cautionary tale about botched circumcision 10. The Lion Prime Minister 11. The Princess and the Peanut Allergy 12. The Three Nanny Goats Gruff 13. Jack the Negotiator of a Fair and Just Treaty of Co-Existence with the Giants I’ll pass. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2015, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34751 "2015-05-11T16:20:25Z")
Fictional Artificial Intelligences: 1. Turing Hopper, from Donna Andrews’ **You’ve Got Murder!** and other novels. ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2015, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34752 "2015-05-11T16:34:37Z")
Fictional Artificial Intelligences: 1. Turing Hopper, from Donna Andrews’ **You’ve Got Murder!** and other novels. 2. HAL 9000 from Arthur C. Clarke’s **Space Odyssey** books and films. ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2015, 4:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34753 "2015-05-11T16:41:42Z")
Fictional Artificial Intelligences: 1. Turing Hopper, from Donna Andrews’ You’ve Got Murder! and other novels. 2. HAL 9000 from Arthur C. Clarke’s Space Odyssey books and films. 3. Deus, from Shadowrun’s Renraku Arcology: Shutdown ---
**Author:** ![Leo\_Bloom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/leo_bloom/32/10377_2.png) [@Leo\_Bloom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Leo_Bloom)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2015, 4:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34754 "2015-05-11T16:52:04Z")
Fictional Artificial Intelligences: 1. Turing Hopper, from Donna Andrews’ You’ve Got Murder! and other novels. 2. HAL 9000 from Arthur C. Clarke’s Space Odyssey books and films. 3. Deus, from Shadowrun’s Renraku Arcology: Shutdown 4. I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E., from Team America: World Police If you send your kids to college for $40,000 dollars a year they can post this on the Internet (no cite because they don’t deserve one): The forced irreverence and iconoclasm of Team America World Police extends to the portrayal of a supercomputer named I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E. but unfortunately the acronym is never deciphered. The affectation of a surfer dude vernacular is unique among computer voice interfaces in the cinematic imaginary. ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2015, 4:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34755 "2015-05-11T16:56:23Z")
Fictional Artificial Intelligences: 1. Turing Hopper, from Donna Andrews’ You’ve Got Murder! and other novels. 2. HAL 9000 from Arthur C. Clarke’s Space Odyssey books and films. 3. Deus, from Shadowrun’s Renraku Arcology: Shutdown 4. I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E., from Team America: World Police 5. Marvin, the paranoid android (frmo HHGttG) ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2015, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34756 "2015-05-11T17:15:37Z")
Fictional Artificial Intelligences: 1. Turing Hopper, from Donna Andrews’ You’ve Got Murder! and other novels. 2. HAL 9000 from Arthur C. Clarke’s Space Odyssey books and films. 3. Deus, from Shadowrun’s Renraku Arcology: Shutdown 4. I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E., from Team America: World Police 5. Marvin, the paranoid android (frmo HHGttG) 6. Master Control Program (MCP), from Tron ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2015, 5:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34757 "2015-05-11T17:20:21Z")
Fictional Artificial Intelligences: 1. Turing Hopper, from Donna Andrews’ You’ve Got Murder! and other novels. 2. HAL 9000 from Arthur C. Clarke’s Space Odyssey books and films. 3. Deus, from Shadowrun’s Renraku Arcology: Shutdown 4. I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E., from Team America: World Police 5. Marvin, the paranoid android (frmo HHGttG) 6. Master Control Program (MCP), from Tron 7. Colossus, from D.F. Jones’s “Colossus: The Forbin Project” ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2015, 5:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34758 "2015-05-11T17:23:20Z")
Fictional Artificial Intelligences: 1. Turing Hopper, from Donna Andrews’ You’ve Got Murder! and other novels. 2. HAL 9000 from Arthur C. Clarke’s Space Odyssey books and films. 3. Deus, from Shadowrun’s Renraku Arcology: Shutdown 4. I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E., from Team America: World Police 5. Marvin, the paranoid android (frmo HHGttG) 6. Master Control Program (MCP), from Tron 7. Colossus, from D.F. Jones’s “Colossus: The Forbin Project” 8. Agent Smith, from the Matrix franchise ---
**Author:** ![Eutychus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Eutychus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eutychus)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2015, 5:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34759 "2015-05-11T17:51:04Z")
Fictional Artificial Intelligences: 1. Turing Hopper, from Donna Andrews’ You’ve Got Murder! and other novels. 2. HAL 9000 from Arthur C. Clarke’s Space Odyssey books and films. 3. Deus, from Shadowrun’s Renraku Arcology: Shutdown 4. I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E., from Team America: World Police 5. Marvin, the paranoid android (frmo HHGttG) 6. Master Control Program (MCP), from Tron 7. Colossus, from D.F. Jones’s “Colossus: The Forbin Project” 8. Agent Smith, from the Matrix franchise 9. AM from “I have No Mouth and I Must Scream” by Harlan Ellison ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2015, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34760 "2015-05-11T18:31:24Z")
Fictional Artificial Intelligences: 1. Turing Hopper, from Donna Andrews’ You’ve Got Murder! and other novels. 2. HAL 9000 from Arthur C. Clarke’s Space Odyssey books and films. 3. Deus, from Shadowrun’s Renraku Arcology: Shutdown 4. I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E., from Team America: World Police 5. Marvin, the paranoid android (frmo HHGttG) 6. Master Control Program (MCP), from Tron 7. Colossus, from D.F. Jones’s “Colossus: The Forbin Project” 8. Agent Smith, from the Matrix franchise 9. AM from “I have No Mouth and I Must Scream” by Harlan Ellison 10. Mike from Robert Heinlein’s The Moon Is a Harsh Mistress ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2015, 6:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34761 "2015-05-11T18:39:52Z")
Fictional Artificial Intelligences: 1. Turing Hopper, from Donna Andrews’ You’ve Got Murder! and other novels. 2. HAL 9000 from Arthur C. Clarke’s Space Odyssey books and films. 3. Deus, from Shadowrun’s Renraku Arcology: Shutdown 4. I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E., from Team America: World Police 5. Marvin, the paranoid android (frmo HHGttG) 6. Master Control Program (MCP), from Tron 7. Colossus, from D.F. Jones’s “Colossus: The Forbin Project” 8. Agent Smith, from the Matrix franchise 9. AM from “I have No Mouth and I Must Scream” by Harlan Ellison 10. Mike from Robert Heinlein’s The Moon Is a Harsh Mistress 11. Andrew Martin, Bicentennial Man ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2015, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34762 "2015-05-11T19:05:23Z")
Fictional Artificial Intelligences: 1. Turing Hopper, from Donna Andrews’ You’ve Got Murder! and other novels. 2. HAL 9000 from Arthur C. Clarke’s Space Odyssey books and films. 3. Deus, from Shadowrun’s Renraku Arcology: Shutdown 4. I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E., from Team America: World Police 5. Marvin, the paranoid android (frmo HHGttG) 6. Master Control Program (MCP), from Tron 7. Colossus, from D.F. Jones’s “Colossus: The Forbin Project” 8. Agent Smith, from the Matrix franchise 9. AM from “I have No Mouth and I Must Scream” by Harlan Ellison 10. Mike from Robert Heinlein’s The Moon Is a Harsh Mistress 11. Andrew Martin, Bicentennial Man 12. Brainiac, from Superman comics ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [May 11, 2015, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/34763 "2015-05-11T19:07:47Z")
Fictional Artificial Intelligences: 1. Turing Hopper, from Donna Andrews’ You’ve Got Murder! and other novels. 2. HAL 9000 from Arthur C. Clarke’s Space Odyssey books and films. 3. Deus, from Shadowrun’s Renraku Arcology: Shutdown 4. I.N.T.E.L.L.I.G.E.N.C.E., from Team America: World Police 5. Marvin, the paranoid android (frmo HHGttG) 6. Master Control Program (MCP), from Tron 7. Colossus, from D.F. Jones’s “Colossus: The Forbin Project” 8. Agent Smith, from the Matrix franchise 9. AM from “I have No Mouth and I Must Scream” by Harlan Ellison 10. Mike from Robert Heinlein’s The Moon Is a Harsh Mistress 11. Andrew Martin, Bicentennial Man 12. Brainiac, from Superman comics 13. JARVIS, in Iron Man movies [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173.md?page=1737) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173.md?page=1739)