# Bakers Dozen **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [August 4, 2010, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173 "2010-08-04T17:56:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1870
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 2:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37384 "2015-08-31T14:46:06Z")
Pretty useless super powers. 1. X-Ray vision that only works on glass. 2. The ability to crawl up floors 3. Perfect 20-20 Hindsight 4. Time travel: I can go an hour into the future in just 60 minutes! 5. The ability to convert water into Miller Lite ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 2:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37385 "2015-08-31T14:59:30Z")
Pretty useless super powers. 1. X-Ray vision that only works on glass. 2. The ability to crawl up floors 3. Perfect 20-20 Hindsight 4. Time travel: I can go an hour into the future in just 60 minutes! 5. The ability to convert water into Miller Lite 6. The ability to convert Miller Lite into urine. ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37386 "2015-08-31T15:33:06Z")
Pretty useless super powers. 1. X-Ray vision that only works on glass. 2. The ability to crawl up floors 3. Perfect 20-20 Hindsight 4. Time travel: I can go an hour into the future in just 60 minutes! 5. The ability to convert water into Miller Lite 6. The ability to convert Miller Lite into urine. 7. Super strength on planets with green suns ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37387 "2015-08-31T15:44:35Z")
Pretty useless super powers. 1. X-Ray vision that only works on glass. 2. The ability to crawl up floors 3. Perfect 20-20 Hindsight 4. Time travel: I can go an hour into the future in just 60 minutes! 5. The ability to convert water into Miller Lite 6. The ability to convert Miller Lite into urine. 7. Super strength on planets with green suns 8. Can transform into Jell-O for 30 seconds at a time ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37388 "2015-08-31T16:00:27Z")
Pretty useless super powers. 1. X-Ray vision that only works on glass. 2. The ability to crawl up floors 3. Perfect 20-20 Hindsight 4. Time travel: I can go an hour into the future in just 60 minutes! 5. The ability to convert water into Miller Lite 6. The ability to convert Miller Lite into urine. 7. Super strength on planets with green suns 8. Can transform into Jell-O for 30 seconds at a time 9. Retractable, razor sharp toenails ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37389 "2015-08-31T16:36:57Z")
Pretty useless super powers. 1. X-Ray vision that only works on glass. 2. The ability to crawl up floors 3. Perfect 20-20 Hindsight 4. Time travel: I can go an hour into the future in just 60 minutes! 5. The ability to convert water into Miller Lite 6. The ability to convert Miller Lite into urine. 7. Super strength on planets with green suns 8. Can transform into Jell-O for 30 seconds at a time 9. Retractable, razor sharp toenails 10. Invisibility, but only in total darkness ---
**Author:** ![swampspruce](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampspruce/32/261_2.png) [@swampspruce](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampspruce)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37390 "2015-08-31T17:12:43Z")
Pretty useless super powers. 1. X-Ray vision that only works on glass. 2. The ability to crawl up floors 3. Perfect 20-20 Hindsight 4. Time travel: I can go an hour into the future in just 60 minutes! 5. The ability to convert water into Miller Lite 6. The ability to convert Miller Lite into urine. 7. Super strength on planets with green suns 8. Can transform into Jell-O for 30 seconds at a time 9. Retractable, razor sharp toenails 10. Invisibility, but only in total darkness 11. Can change eye colour at will. - I don’t know, Prof. Being invisible to infrared could be a pretty useful thing unless total darkness means no spectrum whatsoever…\* ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37391 "2015-08-31T17:15:26Z")
> [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](#): > > 1. Invisibility, but only in total darkness In _Mystery Men_, there was a character whose superpower was invisibility. But it only worked when nobody was looking at him. ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37392 "2015-08-31T17:17:41Z")
Pretty useless super powers. 1. X-Ray vision that only works on glass. 2. The ability to crawl up floors 3. Perfect 20-20 Hindsight 4. Time travel: I can go an hour into the future in just 60 minutes! 5. The ability to convert water into Miller Lite 6. The ability to convert Miller Lite into urine. 7. Super strength on planets with green suns 8. Can transform into Jell-O for 30 seconds at a time 9. Retractable, razor sharp toenails 10. Invisibility, but only in total darkness 11. Can change eye colour at will. 12. Can sleep through any noise, however loud (I really do have this power, btw) ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 7:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37393 "2015-08-31T19:06:05Z")
Pretty useless super powers. 1. X-Ray vision that only works on glass. 2. The ability to crawl up floors 3. Perfect 20-20 Hindsight 4. Time travel: I can go an hour into the future in just 60 minutes! 5. The ability to convert water into Miller Lite 6. The ability to convert Miller Lite into urine. 7. Super strength on planets with green suns 8. Can transform into Jell-O for 30 seconds at a time 9. Retractable, razor sharp toenails 10. Invisibility, but only in total darkness 11. Can change eye colour at will. 12. Can sleep through any noise, however loud (I really do have this power, btw) 13. Can increase amount of dandruff scalp produces by up to 300% Things heard at the MTV VMA’s: 1. No way that was a wardrobe malfunction; it has to have been planned. ---
**Author:** ![swampspruce](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampspruce/32/261_2.png) [@swampspruce](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampspruce)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37394 "2015-08-31T19:11:15Z")
Things heard at the MTV VMA’s: 1. No way that was a wardrobe malfunction; it has to have been planned. 2. So I have Miley and Nicki pencilled in for next season’s Celebrity Big Brother… ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37395 "2015-08-31T19:32:38Z")
Things heard at the MTV VMA’s: 1. No way that was a wardrobe malfunction; it has to have been planned. 2. So I have Miley and Nicki pencilled in for next season’s Celebrity Big Brother… 3. Holy crap… Justin Bieber didn’t suck nearly as bad as I expected. ---
**Author:** ![Thin\_Ice](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/aeb1de/32.png) [@Thin\_Ice](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thin_Ice)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37396 "2015-08-31T20:15:53Z")
Things heard at the MTV VMA’s: 1. No way that was a wardrobe malfunction; it has to have been planned. 2. So I have Miley and Nicki pencilled in for next season’s Celebrity Big Brother… 3. Holy crap… Justin Bieber didn’t suck nearly as bad as I expected. 4. On the other hand, if I run next year I can get Trump as my VP. ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37397 "2015-08-31T20:38:58Z")
Things heard at the MTV VMA’s: 1. No way that was a wardrobe malfunction; it has to have been planned. 2. So I have Miley and Nicki pencilled in for next season’s Celebrity Big Brother… 3. Holy crap… Justin Bieber didn’t suck nearly as bad as I expected. 4. On the other hand, if I run next year I can get Trump as my VP. 5. “And the award for Best Video goes to… wait, they still make videos?” ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37398 "2015-08-31T21:03:26Z")
Things heard at the MTV VMA’s: 1. No way that was a wardrobe malfunction; it has to have been planned. 2. So I have Miley and Nicki pencilled in for next season’s Celebrity Big Brother… 3. Holy crap… Justin Bieber didn’t suck nearly as bad as I expected. 4. On the other hand, if I run next year I can get Trump as my VP. 5. “And the award for Best Video goes to… wait, they still make videos?” 6. So, Kim Kardashian’s gonna be the First Lady? ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [August 31, 2015, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37399 "2015-08-31T21:49:23Z")
Things heard at the MTV VMA’s: 1. No way that was a wardrobe malfunction; it has to have been planned. 2. So I have Miley and Nicki pencilled in for next season’s Celebrity Big Brother… 3. Holy crap… Justin Bieber didn’t suck nearly as bad as I expected. 4. On the other hand, if I run next year I can get Trump as my VP. 5. “And the award for Best Video goes to… wait, they still make videos?” 6. So, Kim Kardashian’s gonna be the First Lady? 7. Yeah, Jared Leto’s definitely hammered. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2015, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37400 "2015-09-01T01:36:23Z")
Things heard at the MTV VMA’s: 1. No way that was a wardrobe malfunction; it has to have been planned. 2. So I have Miley and Nicki pencilled in for next season’s Celebrity Big Brother… 3. Holy crap… Justin Bieber didn’t suck nearly as bad as I expected. 4. On the other hand, if I run next year I can get Trump as my VP. 5. “And the award for Best Video goes to… wait, they still make videos?” 6. So, Kim Kardashian’s gonna be the First Lady? 7. Yeah, Jared Leto’s definitely hammered. 8. You know, I’d never have guessed that Kim Jong-Un was such a Taylor Swift fanboy. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2015, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37401 "2015-09-01T03:17:28Z")
Things heard at the MTV VMA’s: 1. No way that was a wardrobe malfunction; it has to have been planned. 2. So I have Miley and Nicki pencilled in for next season’s Celebrity Big Brother… 3. Holy crap… Justin Bieber didn’t suck nearly as bad as I expected. 4. On the other hand, if I run next year I can get Trump as my VP. 5. “And the award for Best Video goes to… wait, they still make videos?” 6. So, Kim Kardashian’s gonna be the First Lady? 7. Yeah, Jared Leto’s definitely hammered. 8. You know, I’d never have guessed that Kim Jong-Un was such a Taylor Swift fanboy. 9. Taylor and Kanye just need to hook up already so they can get out of each other’s heads… ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2015, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37402 "2015-09-01T13:33:46Z")
Things heard at the MTV VMA’s: 1. No way that was a wardrobe malfunction; it has to have been planned. 2. So I have Miley and Nicki pencilled in for next season’s Celebrity Big Brother… 3. Holy crap… Justin Bieber didn’t suck nearly as bad as I expected. 4. On the other hand, if I run next year I can get Trump as my VP. 5. “And the award for Best Video goes to… wait, they still make videos?” 6. So, Kim Kardashian’s gonna be the First Lady? 7. Yeah, Jared Leto’s definitely hammered. 8. You know, I’d never have guessed that Kim Jong-Un was such a Taylor Swift fanboy. 9. Taylor and Kanye just need to hook up already so they can get out of each other’s heads… 10. Keith Richards just had to be defibrillated. AGAIN. ---
**Author:** ![Sparky812](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eb9ed0/32.png) [@Sparky812](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sparky812)\ **Post date:** [September 1, 2015, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/37403 "2015-09-01T14:52:49Z")
Things heard at the MTV VMA’s: 1. No way that was a wardrobe malfunction; it has to have been planned. 2. So I have Miley and Nicki pencilled in for next season’s Celebrity Big Brother… 3. Holy crap… Justin Bieber didn’t suck nearly as bad as I expected. 4. On the other hand, if I run next year I can get Trump as my VP. 5. “And the award for Best Video goes to… wait, they still make videos?” 6. So, Kim Kardashian’s gonna be the First Lady? 7. Yeah, Jared Leto’s definitely hammered. 8. You know, I’d never have guessed that Kim Jong-Un was such a Taylor Swift fanboy. 9. Taylor and Kanye just need to hook up already so they can get out of each other’s heads… 10. Keith Richards just had to be defibrillated. AGAIN. 11. I don’t care if she has a new album out, I’m not making out with Madge! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173.md?page=1869) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173.md?page=1871)