# Bakers Dozen **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [August 4, 2010, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173 "2010-08-04T17:56:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2604
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2017, 4:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52066 "2017-05-13T16:44:59Z")
More alternate histories, and the point at which history changes 1. The Last Ship by William Brinkley - World War III in late 1988 leaves a single U.S. Navy destroyer and a Soviet missile sub to try to establish a safe foothold for humanity somewhere 2. Guns of the South by Harry Turtledove - Time-traveling South African racists bring Lee & Davis late 20th Century technology weapons to win the Civil War and prevent slavery from being outlawed. Slavery is soon abolished anyway. 3. Pavane by Keith Roberts - Queen Elizabeth I is assassinated, the Spanish conquer England, and the Papacy reigns over a technologically-backwards Europe today 4. Iron Sky - Nazis escape to the moon in 1945. 5. Darwinia by Robert Charles Wilson - in 1912, all humans and human artifacts in Europe disappear, replaced by a bizarre and deadly jungle (then things get weird). 6. On the Beach by Nevil Shute - in 1963, after World War III, nuclear radiation is destroying all life on Earth; a group of people in Australia wait as it spreads south. 7. Resurrection Day by Brendan DuBois - The Cuban Missile Crisis goes badly and ends with a limited nuclear war. 8. Gettysburg: An Alternate History by Peter G. Tsouras - George G. Meade is injured and Winfield Scott Hancock takes command of the Army of the Potomac, aggressively counterattacking after Pickett’s Charge, winning the battle even more decisively, and capturing Robert E. Lee. The Civil War is over by late 1863, saving tens of thousands of lives that were lost in our timeline, and Hancock is elected President in 1868. 9. 11/22/63 by Stephen King - Jack Epping prevents Kennedy’s assassination, and the world goes to Hell. He has to go back again and put history as it was and should be. 10. River of Teeth by Sarah Gailey - In the early 20th century, the U.S. imports hippos and they become an invasive species in the South. 11. The Burning Mountain by Alfred Coppel - The 1945 Trinity nuclear-bomb test is a fizzle, and the Allies stage a horrifically costly invasion of Japan ---
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2017, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52067 "2017-05-13T21:23:47Z")
More alternate histories, and the point at which history changes 1. The Last Ship by William Brinkley - World War III in late 1988 leaves a single U.S. Navy destroyer and a Soviet missile sub to try to establish a safe foothold for humanity somewhere 2. Guns of the South by Harry Turtledove - Time-traveling South African racists bring Lee & Davis late 20th Century technology weapons to win the Civil War and prevent slavery from being outlawed. Slavery is soon abolished anyway. 3. Pavane by Keith Roberts - Queen Elizabeth I is assassinated, the Spanish conquer England, and the Papacy reigns over a technologically-backwards Europe today 4. Iron Sky - Nazis escape to the moon in 1945. 5. Darwinia by Robert Charles Wilson - in 1912, all humans and human artifacts in Europe disappear, replaced by a bizarre and deadly jungle (then things get weird). 6. On the Beach by Nevil Shute - in 1963, after World War III, nuclear radiation is destroying all life on Earth; a group of people in Australia wait as it spreads south. 7. Resurrection Day by Brendan DuBois - The Cuban Missile Crisis goes badly and ends with a limited nuclear war. 8. Gettysburg: An Alternate History by Peter G. Tsouras - George G. Meade is injured and Winfield Scott Hancock takes command of the Army of the Potomac, aggressively counterattacking after Pickett’s Charge, winning the battle even more decisively, and capturing Robert E. Lee. The Civil War is over by late 1863, saving tens of thousands of lives that were lost in our timeline, and Hancock is elected President in 1868. 9. 11/22/63 by Stephen King - Jack Epping prevents Kennedy’s assassination, and the world goes to Hell. He has to go back again and put history as it was and should be. 10. River of Teeth by Sarah Gailey - In the early 20th century, the U.S. imports hippos and they become an invasive species in the South. 11. The Burning Mountain by Alfred Coppel - The 1945 Trinity nuclear-bomb test is a fizzle, and the Allies stage a horrifically costly invasion of Japan 12. Days of Infamy by Harry Turtledove - The Japanese follow up their attack on Pearl Harbor in World War II by invading and occupying Hawaii. ---
**Author:** ![SCAdian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scadian/32/3292_2.png) [@SCAdian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SCAdian)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2017, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52068 "2017-05-13T23:41:39Z")
More alternate histories, and the point at which history changes 1. The Last Ship by William Brinkley - World War III in late 1988 leaves a single U.S. Navy destroyer and a Soviet missile sub to try to establish a safe foothold for humanity somewhere 2. Guns of the South by Harry Turtledove - Time-traveling South African racists bring Lee & Davis late 20th Century technology weapons to win the Civil War and prevent slavery from being outlawed. Slavery is soon abolished anyway. 3. Pavane by Keith Roberts - Queen Elizabeth I is assassinated, the Spanish conquer England, and the Papacy reigns over a technologically-backwards Europe today 4. Iron Sky - Nazis escape to the moon in 1945. 5. Darwinia by Robert Charles Wilson - in 1912, all humans and human artifacts in Europe disappear, replaced by a bizarre and deadly jungle (then things get weird). 6. On the Beach by Nevil Shute - in 1963, after World War III, nuclear radiation is destroying all life on Earth; a group of people in Australia wait as it spreads south. 7. Resurrection Day by Brendan DuBois - The Cuban Missile Crisis goes badly and ends with a limited nuclear war. 8. Gettysburg: An Alternate History by Peter G. Tsouras - George G. Meade is injured and Winfield Scott Hancock takes command of the Army of the Potomac, aggressively counterattacking after Pickett’s Charge, winning the battle even more decisively, and capturing Robert E. Lee. The Civil War is over by late 1863, saving tens of thousands of lives that were lost in our timeline, and Hancock is elected President in 1868. 9. 11/22/63 by Stephen King - Jack Epping prevents Kennedy’s assassination, and the world goes to Hell. He has to go back again and put history as it was and should be. 10. River of Teeth by Sarah Gailey - In the early 20th century, the U.S. imports hippos and they become an invasive species in the South. 11. The Burning Mountain by Alfred Coppel - The 1945 Trinity nuclear-bomb test is a fizzle, and the Allies stage a horrifically costly invasion of Japan 12. Days of Infamy by Harry Turtledove - The Japanese follow up their attack on Pearl Harbor in World War II by invading and occupying Hawaii. 13. The Moscow Option: An Alternative Second World War, by David Downing - Hitler in in a coma after a plane crash in 1941, and his generals run the war in an intelligent manner. Pass. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2017, 11:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52069 "2017-05-13T23:51:18Z")
New! Historians worth reading 1. Daniel J. Boorstin, Librarian of Congress, author of _The Image_, The Americans trilogy & the Knowledge trilogy ---
**Author:** ![SCAdian](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/scadian/32/3292_2.png) [@SCAdian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SCAdian)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2017, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52070 "2017-05-14T01:14:20Z")
Historians worth reading 1. Daniel J. Boorstin, Librarian of Congress, author of _The Image_, The Americans trilogy & the Knowledge trilogy 2. Barry Cunliffe, emeritus professor of European archaeology at Oxford, author of _Europe Between the Oceans_ and _By Steppe, Desert, and Ocean_ ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2017, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52071 "2017-05-14T01:18:25Z")
Historians worth reading 1. Daniel J. Boorstin, Librarian of Congress, author of The Image, The Americans trilogy & the Knowledge trilogy 2. Barry Cunliffe, emeritus professor of European archaeology at Oxford, author of Europe Between the Oceans and By Steppe, Desert, and Ocean 3. David McCullough, Pulitzer-winning biographer and historian And a graduate (many years before me) of my prep school! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2017, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52072 "2017-05-14T02:03:45Z")
Historians worth reading 1. Daniel J. Boorstin, Librarian of Congress, author of The Image, The Americans trilogy & the Knowledge trilogy 2. Barry Cunliffe, emeritus professor of European archaeology at Oxford, author of Europe Between the Oceans and By Steppe, Desert, and Ocean 3. David McCullough, Pulitzer-winning biographer and historian 4. Barbara Tuchman, double Pulitzer winner ---
**Author:** ![gkster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gkster/32/14107_2.png) [@gkster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gkster)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2017, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52073 "2017-05-14T02:17:25Z")
Historians worth reading 1. Daniel J. Boorstin, Librarian of Congress, author of The Image, The Americans trilogy & the Knowledge trilogy 2. Barry Cunliffe, emeritus professor of European archaeology at Oxford, author of Europe Between the Oceans and By Steppe, Desert, and Ocean 3. David McCullough, Pulitzer-winning biographer and historian 4. Barbara Tuchman, double Pulitzer winner 5. Candice Millard, author of _The River of Doubt_ and winner of the PEN Center USA award for Research Nonfiction ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2017, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52074 "2017-05-14T02:24:09Z")
Historians worth reading 1. Daniel J. Boorstin, Librarian of Congress, author of The Image, The Americans trilogy & the Knowledge trilogy 2. Barry Cunliffe, emeritus professor of European archaeology at Oxford, author of Europe Between the Oceans and By Steppe, Desert, and Ocean 3. David McCullough, Pulitzer-winning biographer and historian 4. Barbara Tuchman, double Pulitzer winner 5. Candice Millard, author of The River of Doubt and winner of the PEN Center USA award for Research Nonfiction 6. Ron Chernow, author of Hamilton (from which the hit musical was developed), Washington: A Life, and Titan, about John D. Rockefeller, among other best-selling books McCullough also has two Pulitzer Prizes, and the National Book Award, and is a recipient of the Presidential Medal of Freedom, the nation’s highest civilian award. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2017, 4:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52075 "2017-05-14T04:08:16Z")
Historians worth reading 1. Daniel J. Boorstin, Librarian of Congress, author of The Image, The Americans trilogy & the Knowledge trilogy 2. Barry Cunliffe, emeritus professor of European archaeology at Oxford, author of Europe Between the Oceans and By Steppe, Desert, and Ocean 3. David McCullough, Pulitzer-winning biographer and historian 4. Barbara Tuchman, double Pulitzer winner 5. Candice Millard, author of The River of Doubt and winner of the PEN Center USA award for Research Nonfiction 6. Ron Chernow, author of Hamilton (from which the hit musical was developed), Washington: A Life, and Titan, about John D. Rockefeller, among other best-selling books 7. H.W. Brands, one of my personal favorites. If you’re looking to check him out, I recommend _American Dreams: The United States Since 1945_. ---
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2017, 9:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52076 "2017-05-14T09:16:54Z")
Historians worth reading 1. Daniel J. Boorstin, Librarian of Congress, author of The Image, The Americans trilogy & the Knowledge trilogy 2. Barry Cunliffe, emeritus professor of European archaeology at Oxford, author of Europe Between the Oceans and By Steppe, Desert, and Ocean 3. David McCullough, Pulitzer-winning biographer and historian 4. Barbara Tuchman, double Pulitzer winner 5. Candice Millard, author of The River of Doubt and winner of the PEN Center USA award for Research Nonfiction 6. Ron Chernow, author of Hamilton (from which the hit musical was developed), Washington: A Life, and Titan, about John D. Rockefeller, among other best-selling books 7. H.W. Brands, one of my personal favorites. If you’re looking to check him out, I recommend _American Dreams: The United States Since 1945_. 1. Jeremy Lott, author of _The Warm Bucket Brigade,_ a book about the U.S. vice presidency. A fascinating and entertaining read. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2017, 12:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52077 "2017-05-14T12:04:20Z")
Historians worth reading 1. Daniel J. Boorstin, Librarian of Congress, author of The Image, The Americans trilogy & the Knowledge trilogy 2. Barry Cunliffe, emeritus professor of European archaeology at Oxford, author of Europe Between the Oceans and By Steppe, Desert, and Ocean 3. David McCullough, Pulitzer-winning biographer and historian 4. Barbara Tuchman, double Pulitzer winner 5. Candice Millard, author of The River of Doubt and winner of the PEN Center USA award for Research Nonfiction 6. Ron Chernow, author of Hamilton (from which the hit musical was developed), Washington: A Life, and Titan, about John D. Rockefeller, among other best-selling books 7. H.W. Brands, one of my personal favorites. If you’re looking to check him out, I recommend _American Dreams: The United States Since 1945_. 1. Jeremy Lott, author of _The Warm Bucket Brigade,_ a book about the U.S. vice presidency. A fascinating and entertaining read. 2. Sam Kean, author of books about the history of science ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2017, 1:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52078 "2017-05-14T13:23:39Z")
Historians worth reading 1. Daniel J. Boorstin, Librarian of Congress, author of The Image, The Americans trilogy & the Knowledge trilogy 2. Barry Cunliffe, emeritus professor of European archaeology at Oxford, author of Europe Between the Oceans and By Steppe, Desert, and Ocean 3. David McCullough, Pulitzer-winning biographer and historian 4. Barbara Tuchman, double Pulitzer winner 5. Candice Millard, author of The River of Doubt and winner of the PEN Center USA award for Research Nonfiction 6. Ron Chernow, author of Hamilton (from which the hit musical was developed), Washington: A Life, and Titan, about John D. Rockefeller, among other best-selling books 7. H.W. Brands, one of my personal favorites. If you’re looking to check him out, I recommend American Dreams: The United States Since 1945. 1. Jeremy Lott, author of The Warm Bucket Brigade, a book about the U.S. vice presidency. A fascinating and entertaining read. 2. Sam Kean, author of books about the history of science 3. Cecil Adams, if you want the Straight Dope about history. ---
**Author:** ![gkster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gkster/32/14107_2.png) [@gkster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gkster)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2017, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52079 "2017-05-15T03:05:42Z")
Historians worth reading 1. Daniel J. Boorstin, Librarian of Congress, author of The Image, The Americans trilogy & the Knowledge trilogy 2. Barry Cunliffe, emeritus professor of European archaeology at Oxford, author of Europe Between the Oceans and By Steppe, Desert, and Ocean 3. David McCullough, Pulitzer-winning biographer and historian 4. Barbara Tuchman, double Pulitzer winner 5. Candice Millard, author of The River of Doubt and winner of the PEN Center USA award for Research Nonfiction 6. Ron Chernow, author of Hamilton (from which the hit musical was developed), Washington: A Life, and Titan, about John D. Rockefeller, among other best-selling books 7. H.W. Brands, one of my personal favorites. If you’re looking to check him out, I recommend American Dreams: The United States Since 1945. 1. Jeremy Lott, author of The Warm Bucket Brigade, a book about the U.S. vice presidency. A fascinating and entertaining read. 2. Sam Kean, author of books about the history of science 3. Cecil Adams, if you want the Straight Dope about history. 4. Doris Kearns Goodwin, Pulitzer winner ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2017, 4:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52080 "2017-05-15T04:05:30Z")
Historians worth reading 1. Daniel J. Boorstin, Librarian of Congress, author of The Image, The Americans trilogy & the Knowledge trilogy 2. Barry Cunliffe, emeritus professor of European archaeology at Oxford, author of Europe Between the Oceans and By Steppe, Desert, and Ocean 3. David McCullough, Pulitzer-winning biographer and historian 4. Barbara Tuchman, double Pulitzer winner 5. Candice Millard, author of The River of Doubt and winner of the PEN Center USA award for Research Nonfiction 6. Ron Chernow, author of Hamilton (from which the hit musical was developed), Washington: A Life, and Titan, about John D. Rockefeller, among other best-selling books 7. H.W. Brands, one of my personal favorites. If you’re looking to check him out, I recommend American Dreams: The United States Since 1945. 1. Jeremy Lott, author of The Warm Bucket Brigade, a book about the U.S. vice presidency. A fascinating and entertaining read. 2. Sam Kean, author of books about the history of science 3. Cecil Adams, if you want the Straight Dope about history. 4. Doris Kearns Goodwin, Pulitzer winner 5. William Manchester, USMC ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2017, 4:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52081 "2017-05-15T04:11:44Z")
Historians worth reading 1. Daniel J. Boorstin, Librarian of Congress, author of The Image, The Americans trilogy & the Knowledge trilogy 2. Barry Cunliffe, emeritus professor of European archaeology at Oxford, author of Europe Between the Oceans and By Steppe, Desert, and Ocean 3. David McCullough, Pulitzer-winning biographer and historian 4. Barbara Tuchman, double Pulitzer winner 5. Candice Millard, author of The River of Doubt and winner of the PEN Center USA award for Research Nonfiction 6. Ron Chernow, author of Hamilton (from which the hit musical was developed), Washington: A Life, and Titan, about John D. Rockefeller, among other best-selling books 7. H.W. Brands, one of my personal favorites. If you’re looking to check him out, I recommend American Dreams: The United States Since 1945. 1. Jeremy Lott, author of The Warm Bucket Brigade, a book about the U.S. vice presidency. A fascinating and entertaining read. 2. Sam Kean, author of books about the history of science 3. Cecil Adams, if you want the Straight Dope about history. 4. Doris Kearns Goodwin, Pulitzer winner 5. William Manchester, USMC 6. Joseph Ellis, Pulitzer Prize-winner for Founding Brothers, an excellent account of the Framers in their relationships with one another as friends, allies, frenemies and outright foes Next category: Donald Trump’s next tweet 1. I actually fired Comey because he made a pass at Melania. True story! ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2017, 7:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52082 "2017-05-15T07:35:48Z")
Donald Trump’s next tweet 1. I actually fired Comey because he made a pass at Melania. True story! 2. Okay, forget the wall- we’re putting up an invisible fence. Now all we have to do is get 125 million Mexicans to wear these electronic dog collars. ---
**Author:** ![ekedolphin](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ekedolphin/32/10003_2.png) [@ekedolphin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ekedolphin)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2017, 7:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52083 "2017-05-15T07:38:33Z")
Donald Trump’s next tweet 1. I actually fired Comey because he made a pass at Melania. True story! 2. Okay, forget the wall- we’re putting up an invisible fence. Now all we have to do is get 125 million Mexicans to wear these electronic dog collars. 3. Kim Jong-un is actually a stand-up guy. He’s got a bad reputation here in America, though. Sad! ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2017, 9:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52084 "2017-05-15T09:47:18Z")
Donald Trump’s next tweet 1. I actually fired Comey because he made a pass at Melania. True story! 2. Okay, forget the wall- we’re putting up an invisible fence. Now all we have to do is get 125 million Mexicans to wear these electronic dog collars. 3. Kim Jong-un is actually a stand-up guy. He’s got a bad reputation here in America, though. Sad! 4. I’m naming my son, Barron, to head the FBI. Well, as soon as school is out. How hard can it be? ---
**Author:** ![astorian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ad7895/32.png) [@astorian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astorian)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2017, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/52085 "2017-05-15T18:34:41Z")
Donald Trump’s next tweet 1. I actually fired Comey because he made a pass at Melania. True story! 2. Okay, forget the wall- we’re putting up an invisible fence. Now all we have to do is get 125 million Mexicans to wear these electronic dog collars. 3. Kim Jong-un is actually a stand-up guy. He’s got a bad reputation here in America, though. Sad! 4. I’m naming my son, Barron, to head the FBI. Well, as soon as school is out. How hard can it be? 5. I’ll have all the contenders for the next Supreme Court vacancy open a lemonade stand, and whoever sells the most lemonade gets the job [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173.md?page=2603) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173.md?page=2605)