# Bakers Dozen **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [August 4, 2010, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173 "2010-08-04T17:56:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 438
**Author:** ![Rebo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rebo/32/13005_2.png) [@Rebo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rebo)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8742 "2011-11-24T21:42:49Z")
Horror Authors 1. HP Lovecraft 2. E.A. Poe 3. Stephen King 4. Graham Masterton 5. Dean Koontz 6. Richard Laymon 7. John Saul 8. Kim Newman 9. Clive Barker 10. Chelsea Quinn Yarbro 11. Peter Straub ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [November 24, 2011, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8743 "2011-11-24T21:54:54Z")
Horror Authors 1. HP Lovecraft 2. E.A. Poe 3. Stephen King 4. Graham Masterton 5. Dean Koontz 6. Richard Laymon 7. John Saul 8. Kim Newman 9. Clive Barker 10. Chelsea Quinn Yarbro 11. Peter Straub 12. William Peter Blatty ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2011, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8744 "2011-11-25T01:34:51Z")
Horror Authors 1. HP Lovecraft 2. E.A. Poe 3. Stephen King 4. Graham Masterton 5. Dean Koontz 6. Richard Laymon 7. John Saul 8. Kim Newman 9. Clive Barker 10. Chelsea Quinn Yarbro 11. Peter Straub 12. William Peter Blatty 13. Robert Bloch Next category: Things you don’t really want to hear around the Thanksgiving table 1. “I thought you said this turkey had some kind of tumor on it…?” ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2011, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8745 "2011-11-25T03:11:51Z")
Things you don’t really want to hear around the Thanksgiving table 1. “I thought you said this turkey had some kind of tumor on it…?” 2. “Mom, Dad, I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you…” ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2011, 2:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8746 "2011-11-25T14:18:10Z")
Things you don’t really want to hear around the Thanksgiving table 1. “I thought you said this turkey had some kind of tumor on it…?” 2. “Mom, Dad, I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you…” 3. “Honey, remember the women that our son married, then adopted her son of unknown paternity, and later divorced? Well, I am that child’s biological father.”–John Clark to wife actress Lynn Redgrave, as she prepared the Thanksgiving dinner. ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2011, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8747 "2011-11-25T17:50:08Z")
Things you don’t really want to hear around the Thanksgiving table 1. “I thought you said this turkey had some kind of tumor on it…?” 2. “Mom, Dad, I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you…” 3. “Honey, remember the women that our son married, then adopted her son of unknown paternity, and later divorced? Well, I am that child’s biological father.”–John Clark to wife actress Lynn Redgrave, as she prepared the Thanksgiving dinner. [/QUOTE] 4. “Wait–you’re supposed to use a meat thermometer on the turkey?” ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2011, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8748 "2011-11-25T19:57:57Z")
Things you don’t really want to hear around the Thanksgiving table 1. “I thought you said this turkey had some kind of tumor on it…?” 2. “Mom, Dad, I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you…” 3. “Honey, remember the women that our son married, then adopted her son of unknown paternity, and later divorced? Well, I am that child’s biological father.”–John Clark to wife actress Lynn Redgrave, as she prepared the Thanksgiving dinner. [/QUOTE] 4. “Wait–you’re supposed to use a meat thermometer on the turkey?” 5. “What I am most thankful for is that unlike the rest of you I have the antidote to the little extra ingredient I put in the dressing…” ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2011, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8749 "2011-11-25T20:07:21Z")
Things you don’t really want to hear around the Thanksgiving table 1. “I thought you said this turkey had some kind of tumor on it…?” 2. “Mom, Dad, I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you…” 3. “Honey, remember the women that our son married, then adopted her son of unknown paternity, and later divorced? Well, I am that child’s biological father.”–John Clark to wife actress Lynn Redgrave, as she prepared the Thanksgiving dinner. [/quote] 4. “Wait–you’re supposed to use a meat thermometer on the turkey?” 5. “What I am most thankful for is that unlike the rest of you I have the antidote to the little extra ingredient I put in the dressing…” 6. “And now, it’s time for the airing of grievances, followed by the feats of strength!” Of course, this one is expected around the Festivus table… ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2011, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8750 "2011-11-25T20:09:23Z")
Things you don’t really want to hear around the Thanksgiving table 1. “I thought you said this turkey had some kind of tumor on it…?” 2. “Mom, Dad, I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you…” 3. “Honey, remember the women that our son married, then adopted her son of unknown paternity, and later divorced? Well, I am that child’s biological father.”–John Clark to wife actress Lynn Redgrave, as she prepared the Thanksgiving dinner. [/quote] 4. “Wait–you’re supposed to use a meat thermometer on the turkey?” 5. “What I am most thankful for is that unlike the rest of you I have the antidote to the little extra ingredient I put in the dressing…” 6. “And now, it’s time for the airing of grievances, followed by the feats of strength!” 7. “What? In some countries that’s considered good manners!” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2011, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8751 "2011-11-25T20:15:25Z")
Things you don’t really want to hear around the Thanksgiving table 1. “I thought you said this turkey had some kind of tumor on it…?” 2. “Mom, Dad, I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you…” 3. “Honey, remember the women that our son married, then adopted her son of unknown paternity, and later divorced? Well, I am that child’s biological father.”–John Clark to wife actress Lynn Redgrave, as she prepared the Thanksgiving dinner. 4. “Wait–you’re supposed to use a meat thermometer on the turkey?” 5. “What I am most thankful for is that unlike the rest of you I have the antidote to the little extra ingredient I put in the dressing…” 6. “And now, it’s time for the airing of grievances, followed by the feats of strength!” 7. “What? In some countries that’s considered good manners!” 8. “Sorry, I ate the pie already. Yes, all of it.” ---
**Author:** ![YoDoc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/e68b1a/32.png) [@YoDoc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YoDoc)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2011, 8:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8752 "2011-11-25T20:33:24Z")
Things you don’t really want to hear around the Thanksgiving table 1. “I thought you said this turkey had some kind of tumor on it…?” 2. “Mom, Dad, I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you…” 3. “Honey, remember the women that our son married, then adopted her son of unknown paternity, and later divorced? Well, I am that child’s biological father.”–John Clark to wife actress Lynn Redgrave, as she prepared the Thanksgiving dinner. 4. “Wait–you’re supposed to use a meat thermometer on the turkey?” 5. “What I am most thankful for is that unlike the rest of you I have the antidote to the little extra ingredient I put in the dressing…” 6. “And now, it’s time for the airing of grievances, followed by the feats of strength!” 7. “What? In some countries that’s considered good manners!” 8. “Sorry, I ate the pie already. Yes, all of it.” 9. "What do you mean, ‘turtle, not turkey’? – my mom to my grandpa two years ago. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2011, 10:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8753 "2011-11-25T22:52:23Z")
Things you don’t really want to hear around the Thanksgiving table 1. “I thought you said this turkey had some kind of tumor on it…?” 2. “Mom, Dad, I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you…” 3. “Honey, remember the women that our son married, then adopted her son of unknown paternity, and later divorced? Well, I am that child’s biological father.”–John Clark to wife actress Lynn Redgrave, as she prepared the Thanksgiving dinner. 4. “Wait–you’re supposed to use a meat thermometer on the turkey?” 5. “What I am most thankful for is that unlike the rest of you I have the antidote to the little extra ingredient I put in the dressing…” 6. “And now, it’s time for the airing of grievances, followed by the feats of strength!” 7. “What? In some countries that’s considered good manners!” 8. “Sorry, I ate the pie already. Yes, all of it.” 9. "What do you mean, ‘turtle, not turkey’? – my mom to my grandpa two years ago. 10. “He brought ninety five tribe members with him? We were expecting maybe a dozen, two dozen max! How the hell are we supposed to feed ninety five!?” The Pilgrims when Chief Massassoit arrived at the 1621 feast ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [November 25, 2011, 10:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8754 "2011-11-25T22:56:13Z")
[QUOTE=Annie-Xmas] 3. “Honey, remember the women that our son married, then adopted her son of unknown paternity, and later divorced? Well, I am that child’s biological father.”–John Clark to wife actress Lynn Redgrave, as she prepared the Thanksgiving dinner. [/QUOTE] When she died last year he was physically barred from attending her funeral. So he faked a heart attack. He sounds like a real piece of work. ---
**Author:** ![notfrommensa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/f14d63/32.png) [@notfrommensa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/notfrommensa)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2011, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8755 "2011-11-26T00:38:58Z")
Things you don’t really want to hear around the Thanksgiving table 1. “I thought you said this turkey had some kind of tumor on it…?” 2. “Mom, Dad, I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you…” 3. “Honey, remember the women that our son married, then adopted her son of unknown paternity, and later divorced? Well, I am that child’s biological father.”–John Clark to wife actress Lynn Redgrave, as she prepared the Thanksgiving dinner. 4. “Wait–you’re supposed to use a meat thermometer on the turkey?” 5. “What I am most thankful for is that unlike the rest of you I have the antidote to the little extra ingredient I put in the dressing…” 6. “And now, it’s time for the airing of grievances, followed by the feats of strength!” 7. “What? In some countries that’s considered good manners!” 8. “Sorry, I ate the pie already. Yes, all of it.” 9. "What do you mean, ‘turtle, not turkey’? – my mom to my grandpa two years ago. 10. “He brought ninety five tribe members with him? We were expecting maybe a dozen, two dozen max! How the hell are we supposed to feed ninety five!?” 11. “Is it time to cut the cheese” ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2011, 1:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8756 "2011-11-26T01:22:10Z")
Things you don’t really want to hear around the Thanksgiving table 1. “I thought you said this turkey had some kind of tumor on it…?” 2. “Mom, Dad, I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you…” 3. “Honey, remember the women that our son married, then adopted her son of unknown paternity, and later divorced? Well, I am that child’s biological father.”–John Clark to wife actress Lynn Redgrave, as she prepared the Thanksgiving dinner. 4. “Wait–you’re supposed to use a meat thermometer on the turkey?” 5. “What I am most thankful for is that unlike the rest of you I have the antidote to the little extra ingredient I put in the dressing…” 6. “And now, it’s time for the airing of grievances, followed by the feats of strength!” 7. “What? In some countries that’s considered good manners!” 8. “Sorry, I ate the pie already. Yes, all of it.” 9. "What do you mean, ‘turtle, not turkey’? – my mom to my grandpa two years ago. 10. “He brought ninety five tribe members with him? We were expecting maybe a dozen, two dozen max! How the hell are we supposed to feed ninety five!?” 11. “Is it time to cut the cheese” 12. “Well, everyone’s here. I guess I better get started on the turkey. By the way, there were no instructions so does anyone know how long it takes to nuke a frozen turkey?” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2011, 1:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8757 "2011-11-26T01:49:49Z")
Things you don’t really want to hear around the Thanksgiving table 1. “I thought you said this turkey had some kind of tumor on it…?” 2. “Mom, Dad, I’ve been waiting for the right time to tell you…” 3. “Honey, remember the women that our son married, then adopted her son of unknown paternity, and later divorced? Well, I am that child’s biological father.”–John Clark to wife actress Lynn Redgrave, as she prepared the Thanksgiving dinner. 4. “Wait–you’re supposed to use a meat thermometer on the turkey?” 5. “What I am most thankful for is that unlike the rest of you I have the antidote to the little extra ingredient I put in the dressing…” 6. “And now, it’s time for the airing of grievances, followed by the feats of strength!” 7. “What? In some countries that’s considered good manners!” 8. “Sorry, I ate the pie already. Yes, all of it.” 9. "What do you mean, ‘turtle, not turkey’? – my mom to my grandpa two years ago. 10. “He brought ninety five tribe members with him? We were expecting maybe a dozen, two dozen max! How the hell are we supposed to feed ninety five!?” 11. “Is it time to cut the cheese” 12. “Well, everyone’s here. I guess I better get started on the turkey. By the way, there were no instructions so does anyone know how long it takes to nuke a frozen turkey?” 13. “Mom, Dad, I wanted to bring my five wives home for you to meet. And here they are…!” I started this category, so I’ll let someone else start the next one. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2011, 4:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8758 "2011-11-26T04:24:05Z")
Famous people who believe/believed in reincarnation 1. General George S. Patton ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2011, 4:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8759 "2011-11-26T04:29:26Z")
Famous people who believe/believed in reincarnation 1. General George S. Patton 2. Shirley MacLaine ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2011, 4:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8760 "2011-11-26T04:46:28Z")
Famous people who believe/believed in reincarnation 1. General George S. Patton 2. Shirley MacLaine 3. Carl Jung ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2011, 4:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/8761 "2011-11-26T04:51:29Z")
Famous people who believe/believed in reincarnation 1. General George S. Patton 2. Shirley MacLaine 3. Carl Jung 4. William James [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173.md?page=437) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173.md?page=439)