# Bakers Dozen **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [August 4, 2010, 5:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173 "2010-08-04T17:56:40Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 529
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2012, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10562 "2012-04-19T18:50:02Z")
SFW Websites to kill time at work (with links) 1. [The Straight Dope](http://www.straightdope.com/) 2. [Facebook](http://www.facebook.com) 3. [Cracked](http://www.cracked.com) 4. [TV Tropes](http://tvtropes.org) 5. [Lazylaces](http://www.lazylaces.com/) 6. [The Onion](http://www.theonion.com/) 7. [snopes.com](http://www.snopes.com/) ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [April 19, 2012, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10563 "2012-04-19T19:11:59Z")
SFW Websites to kill time at work (with links) 1. [The Straight Dope](http://www.straightdope.com/) 2. [Facebook](http://www.facebook.com) 3. [Cracked](http://www.cracked.com) 4. [TV Tropes](http://tvtropes.org) 5. [Lazylaces](http://www.lazylaces.com/) 6. [The Onion](http://www.theonion.com/) 7. [snopes.com](http://www.snopes.com/) 8. [icanhascheezburger.com](http://www.icanhascheezburger.com/) ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2012, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10564 "2012-04-20T01:33:41Z")
dup ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2012, 1:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10565 "2012-04-20T01:34:56Z")
SFW Websites to kill time at work (with links) 1. [The Straight Dope](http://www.straightdope.com/) 2. [Facebook](http://www.facebook.com) 3. [Cracked](http://www.cracked.com) 4. [TV Tropes](http://tvtropes.org) 5. [Lazylaces](http://www.lazylaces.com/) 6. [The Onion](http://www.theonion.com/) 7. [snopes.com](http://www.snopes.com/) 8. [icanhascheezburger.com](http://www.icanhascheezburger.com/) 9. [Wikipedia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cecil_Adams) ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2012, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10566 "2012-04-20T02:19:55Z")
SFW Websites to kill time at work (with links) 1. [The Straight Dope](http://www.straightdope.com/) 2. [Facebook](http://www.facebook.com) 3. [Cracked](http://www.cracked.com) 4. [TV Tropes](http://tvtropes.org) 5. [Lazylaces](http://www.lazylaces.com/) 6. [The Onion](http://www.theonion.com/) 7. [snopes.com](http://www.snopes.com/) 8. [icanhascheezburger.com](http://www.icanhascheezburger.com/) 9. [Wikipedia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cecil_Adams) 10. [CNN.com](http://www.cnn.com) ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2012, 2:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10567 "2012-04-20T02:47:18Z")
SFW Websites to kill time at work (with links) 1. [The Straight Dope](http://www.straightdope.com/) 2. [Facebook](http://www.facebook.com) 3. [Cracked](http://www.cracked.com) 4. [TV Tropes](http://tvtropes.org) 5. [Lazylaces](http://www.lazylaces.com/) 6. [The Onion](http://www.theonion.com/) 7. [snopes.com](http://www.snopes.com/) 8. [icanhascheezburger.com](http://www.icanhascheezburger.com/) 9. [Wikipedia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cecil_Adams) 10. [CNN.com](http://www.cnn.com) 11. [Arts & Letters Daily](http://www.aldaily.com/) ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2012, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10568 "2012-04-20T03:57:57Z")
SFW Websites to kill time at work (with links) 1. [The Straight Dope](http://www.straightdope.com/) 2. [Facebook](http://www.facebook.com) 3. [Cracked](http://www.cracked.com) 4. [TV Tropes](http://tvtropes.org) 5. [Lazylaces](http://www.lazylaces.com/) 6. [The Onion](http://www.theonion.com/) 7. [snopes.com](http://www.snopes.com/) 8. [icanhascheezburger.com](http://www.icanhascheezburger.com/) 9. [Wikipedia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cecil_Adams) 10. [CNN.com](http://www.cnn.com) 11. [Arts & Letters Daily](http://www.aldaily.com/) 12. [The AV Club](http://www.avclub.com/articles/characters-we-most-love-to-hate,70192/) ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2012, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10569 "2012-04-20T12:58:23Z")
SFW Websites to kill time at work (with links) 1. [The Straight Dope](http://www.straightdope.com/) 2. [Facebook](http://www.facebook.com) 3. [Cracked](http://www.cracked.com) 4. [TV Tropes](http://tvtropes.org) 5. [Lazylaces](http://www.lazylaces.com/) 6. [The Onion](http://www.theonion.com/) 7. [snopes.com](http://www.snopes.com/) 8. [icanhascheezburger.com](http://www.icanhascheezburger.com/) 9. [Wikipedia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cecil_Adams) 10. [CNN.com](http://www.cnn.com) 11. [Arts & Letters Daily](http://www.aldaily.com/) 12. [The AV Club](http://www.avclub.com/articles/characters-we-most-love-to-hate,70192/) 13. [Memory Alpha](http://en.memory-alpha.org/wiki/Portal:Main) Next category: Things you never, ever want to say to your mistress 1. “Wow. Have you put on weight?” ---
**Author:** ![Sparky812](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eb9ed0/32.png) [@Sparky812](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sparky812)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2012, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10570 "2012-04-20T14:43:59Z")
Things you never, ever want to say to your mistress 1. “Wow. Have you put on weight?” 2. “Safe word!? … I don’t need no stinking safe word!” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2012, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10571 "2012-04-20T15:46:30Z")
Things you never, ever want to say to your mistress 1. “Wow. Have you put on weight?” 2. “Safe word!? … I don’t need no stinking safe word!” 3. “You never told me I couldn’t have another mistress.” ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2012, 5:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10572 "2012-04-20T17:15:25Z")
Things you never, ever want to say to your mistress 1. “Wow. Have you put on weight?” 2. “Safe word!? … I don’t need no stinking safe word!” 3. “You never told me I couldn’t have another mistress.” 4. “What we have is special. When I drop you for a younger mistress in a couple years, I’m really going to miss you.” ---
**Author:** ![Blkshp](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blkshp/32/7135_2.png) [@Blkshp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blkshp)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2012, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10573 "2012-04-20T17:31:22Z")
Things you never, ever want to say to your mistress 1. “Wow. Have you put on weight?” 2. “Safe word!? … I don’t need no stinking safe word!” 3. “You never told me I couldn’t have another mistress.” 4. “What we have is special. When I drop you for a younger mistress in a couple years, I’m really going to miss you.” 5. “Call me at home. Just leave a message if I’m not there”. ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2012, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10574 "2012-04-20T17:43:03Z")
Things you never, ever want to say to your mistress 1. “Wow. Have you put on weight?” 2. “Safe word!? … I don’t need no stinking safe word!” 3. “You never told me I couldn’t have another mistress.” 4. “What we have is special. When I drop you for a younger mistress in a couple years, I’m really going to miss you.” 5. “Call me at home. Just leave a message if I’m not there”. 6. “My wife really gets me and we have great sex. Why?” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2012, 5:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10575 "2012-04-20T17:58:00Z")
Things you never, ever want to say to your mistress 1. “Wow. Have you put on weight?” 2. “Safe word!? … I don’t need no stinking safe word!” 3. “You never told me I couldn’t have another mistress.” 4. “What we have is special. When I drop you for a younger mistress in a couple years, I’m really going to miss you.” 5. “Call me at home. Just leave a message if I’m not there.” 6. “My wife really gets me and we have great sex. Why?” 7. “So… do you have a younger, prettier sister?” ---
**Author:** ![Blkshp](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blkshp/32/7135_2.png) [@Blkshp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blkshp)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2012, 5:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10576 "2012-04-20T17:59:34Z")
Things you never, ever want to say to your mistress 1. “Wow. Have you put on weight?” 2. “Safe word!? … I don’t need no stinking safe word!” 3. “You never told me I couldn’t have another mistress.” 4. “What we have is special. When I drop you for a younger mistress in a couple years, I’m really going to miss you.” 5. “Call me at home. Just leave a message if I’m not there”. 6. "My wife really gets me and we have great sex. Why? 7. “I’m married to a great therapist, here’s her number” ---
**Author:** ![Sparky812](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/eb9ed0/32.png) [@Sparky812](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sparky812)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2012, 7:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10577 "2012-04-20T19:48:38Z")
Things you never, ever want to say to your mistress 1. “Wow. Have you put on weight?” 2. “Safe word!? … I don’t need no stinking safe word!” 3. “You never told me I couldn’t have another mistress.” 4. “What we have is special. When I drop you for a younger mistress in a couple years, I’m really going to miss you.” 5. “Call me at home. Just leave a message if I’m not there”. 6. "My wife really gets me and we have great sex. Why? 7. “I’m married to a great therapist, here’s her number” 8. “I love my wife and kids and have decided to work things out.” Probably the worst thing you can say because it can turn mistress into Amy Fisher. ---
**Author:** ![JohnT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/johnt/32/15048_2.png) [@JohnT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnT)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2012, 8:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10578 "2012-04-20T20:00:34Z")
Things you never, ever want to say to your mistress 1. “Wow. Have you put on weight?” 2. “Safe word!? … I don’t need no stinking safe word!” 3. “You never told me I couldn’t have another mistress.” 4. “What we have is special. When I drop you for a younger mistress in a couple years, I’m really going to miss you.” 5. “Call me at home. Just leave a message if I’m not there”. 6. "My wife really gets me and we have great sex. Why? 7. “I’m married to a great therapist, here’s her number” 8. “I love my wife and kids and have decided to work things out.” 9. “I love you.” ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [April 20, 2012, 8:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10579 "2012-04-20T20:05:21Z")
Things you never, ever want to say to your mistress 1. “Wow. Have you put on weight?” 2. “Safe word!? … I don’t need no stinking safe word!” 3. “You never told me I couldn’t have another mistress.” 4. “What we have is special. When I drop you for a younger mistress in a couple years, I’m really going to miss you.” 5. “Call me at home. Just leave a message if I’m not there”. 6. "My wife really gets me and we have great sex. Why? 7. “I’m married to a great therapist, here’s her number” 8. “I love my wife and kids and have decided to work things out.” 9. “I love you.” 10. “Talk? If I wanted to talk to somebody, I’d go home to my wife.” ---
**Author:** ![Blkshp](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blkshp/32/7135_2.png) [@Blkshp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blkshp)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2012, 1:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10580 "2012-04-21T01:27:56Z")
Things you never, ever want to say to your mistress 1. “Wow. Have you put on weight?” 2. “Safe word!? … I don’t need no stinking safe word!” 3. “You never told me I couldn’t have another mistress.” 4. “What we have is special. When I drop you for a younger mistress in a couple years, I’m really going to miss you.” 5. “Call me at home. Just leave a message if I’m not there”. 6. "My wife really gets me and we have great sex. Why? 7. “I’m married to a great therapist, here’s her number” 8. “I love my wife and kids and have decided to work things out.” 9. “I love you.” 10. “Talk? If I wanted to talk to somebody, I’d go home to my wife.” 11. “My wife is out of town why don’t you come over; I’m out of clean socks and the dishes are piling up.” ---
**Author:** ![Age\_Quod\_Agis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/d07c76/32.png) [@Age\_Quod\_Agis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Age_Quod_Agis)\ **Post date:** [April 21, 2012, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173/10581 "2012-04-21T01:47:02Z")
Things you never, ever want to say to your mistress 1. “Wow. Have you put on weight?” 2. “Safe word!? … I don’t need no stinking safe word!” 3. “You never told me I couldn’t have another mistress.” 4. “What we have is special. When I drop you for a younger mistress in a couple years, I’m really going to miss you.” 5. “Call me at home. Just leave a message if I’m not there”. 6. "My wife really gets me and we have great sex. Why? 7. “I’m married to a great therapist, here’s her number” 8. “I love my wife and kids and have decided to work things out.” 9. “I love you.” 10. “Talk? If I wanted to talk to somebody, I’d go home to my wife.” 11. “My wife is out of town why don’t you come over; I’m out of clean socks and the dishes are piling up.” 12. “Seeing you in that lingerie reminds me of my wife … 's mom.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173.md?page=528) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/bakers-dozen/549173.md?page=530)