# Balrog vs Smaug - Who wins? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 11, 2017, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/balrog-vs-smaug-who-wins/786376 "2017-05-11T18:03:34Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![FloatyGimpy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/floatygimpy/32/7750_2.png) [@FloatyGimpy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FloatyGimpy)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2017, 6:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/balrog-vs-smaug-who-wins/786376/81 "2017-05-15T18:12:18Z")
Can I just say this thread is giving me a nerdgasm! Especially because I’m re-reading The Silmarillion right now. Also my bet is totally on a Balrog over Smaug. ---
**Author:** ![DSYoungEsq](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c6cbf5/32.png) [@DSYoungEsq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DSYoungEsq)\ **Post date:** [May 15, 2017, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/balrog-vs-smaug-who-wins/786376/82 "2017-05-15T21:13:05Z")
The whole thread has been a flight of fantasy. ---
**Author:** ![marshmallow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/df705f/32.png) [@marshmallow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/marshmallow)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2017, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/balrog-vs-smaug-who-wins/786376/83 "2017-05-16T01:58:18Z")
How strong are Balrogs? Strong enough so Smaug can’t pick one up and tear them in half? ---
**Author:** ![simster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/simster/32/1047_2.png) [@simster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/simster)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2017, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/balrog-vs-smaug-who-wins/786376/84 "2017-05-16T02:55:52Z")
> [@marshmallow](#): > > How strong are Balrogs? Strong enough so Smaug can’t pick one up and tear them in half? One does not simply pick up a Balrog. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [May 16, 2017, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/balrog-vs-smaug-who-wins/786376/85 "2017-05-16T03:03:08Z")
> [@simster](#): > > One does not simply pick up a Balrog. Give me a long enough lever… ---
**Author:** ![Marci\_Al](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e47c2d/32.png) [@Marci\_Al](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marci_Al)\ **Post date:** [June 14, 2017, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/balrog-vs-smaug-who-wins/786376/86 "2017-06-14T23:43:04Z")
To kill a dragon, all you need is a well-timed thrust underneath. Even a dwarf’s dagger is enough to make it retreat. The trouble is its senses are very acute. It can detect you (when it’s not lazy or careless.) Second, its weapons have a wider kill zone. It’s very difficult to defend against it but it has been done (Earendil, Bard and Azaghal.) Better to attack it with stealth (Turin.) To kill a balrog, you first need a lot of water. Second, it’s desirable to fight it from a high place as it obviously has issues with heights. The trouble is when you’re defending against it, which was the case with Gandalf, Echtelion, and Glorfindel, it has a power of fear over its foes that only Maiar or high elves can overcome that fear. But other than that, it’s just an over-sized human form. ---
**Author:** ![Weisshund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ba8739/32.png) [@Weisshund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weisshund)\ **Post date:** [June 16, 2017, 1:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/balrog-vs-smaug-who-wins/786376/87 "2017-06-16T01:46:13Z")
> [@Filbert](#): > > It’s a Maia, plural Maiar. > > Sorry. Turn around You’re welcome 😃 ---
**Author:** ![The\_Piranha\_Brothers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/aca169/32.png) [@The\_Piranha\_Brothers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Piranha_Brothers)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2017, 10:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/balrog-vs-smaug-who-wins/786376/88 "2017-06-17T22:08:21Z")
> [@snfaulkner](#): > > What if they fought on a treadmill? And a pissed off Teddy Roosevelt shows up? What if one of them has a catapult? > [@Filbert](#): > > It’s really not very clear- I have not seen the third Hobbit [del]abomination[/del] movie, but my interpretation from the book, as someone who kept reptiles for years, was always of an old damaged bit on Smaug, as there isn’t a ‘hollow’ on a lizard belly. From your experience, do they all run away in the middle of a fight to torch the nearest settlement, before they’ve even killed their original attackers? I read Von Clausewitz _and_ The Art of War three times, hoping to find a proper explanation, but this strategy - let’s call it: the non sequitur stratagem - is one that they never mentioned. ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [June 17, 2017, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/balrog-vs-smaug-who-wins/786376/89 "2017-06-17T23:20:24Z")
Victory goes to whichever one has a 1920s Style Death Ray. In the ancient tradition. ---
**Author:** ![Weisshund](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ba8739/32.png) [@Weisshund](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Weisshund)\ **Post date:** [June 18, 2017, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/balrog-vs-smaug-who-wins/786376/90 "2017-06-18T19:38:28Z")
> [@The\_Piranha\_Brothers](#): > > From your experience, do they all run away in the middle of a fight to torch the nearest settlement, before they’ve even killed their original attackers? “_I yield where my enemy is, to attack where my enemy is not_” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2017, 2:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/balrog-vs-smaug-who-wins/786376/91 "2017-06-26T02:14:05Z")
Just found, in _The Fellowship of the Ring_, in the chapter “The Mirror of Galadriel,” this passage (p. 347 of my HoughtonMifflin 1994 edition), when Legolas is asked what killed Gandalf: \*“It was a Balrog of Morgoth,” said Legolas, “of all elf-banes the most deadly, save the One who sits in the Dark Tower.” \* So Gimli’s pal, at least, seemed to rank balrogs as more dangerous than dragons. ---
**Author:** ![TYphoonSignal8](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e99b99/32.png) [@TYphoonSignal8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TYphoonSignal8)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2017, 8:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/balrog-vs-smaug-who-wins/786376/92 "2017-06-26T08:31:31Z")
Smaug eats him as a breath freshener. ---
**Author:** ![Drunky\_Smurf](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/drunky_smurf/32/449_2.png) [@Drunky\_Smurf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Drunky_Smurf)\ **Post date:** [June 26, 2017, 5:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/balrog-vs-smaug-who-wins/786376/93 "2017-06-26T17:07:14Z")
> [@snfaulkner](#): > > [Glamdring](https://youtu.be/BS3ybMWQ_s8), the foe hammer. Why is a sword called a hammer? That doesn’t even make sense. It calls into question the factual basis of this history. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2017, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/balrog-vs-smaug-who-wins/786376/94 "2017-06-27T13:26:22Z")
:: indignantly points at **Drunky Smurf** :: Heretic! [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/balrog-vs-smaug-who-wins/786376.md?page=4)