# Barry Bonds **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [September 8, 2007, 6:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/barry-bonds/418446 "2007-09-08T06:20:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2007, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/barry-bonds/418446/41 "2007-09-09T16:05:46Z")
Um, guys…I think the words “nefarious henchmen” in the OP might be a little tip-off that we’re being whooshed here. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2007, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/barry-bonds/418446/42 "2007-09-09T16:15:43Z")
I vote for “really bad at sarcasm.” See, usually, sarcasm is recognizable because it’s set against a pre-established background of some sort. And your OP kind of appeared out of a vacuum. FTR, I’ve hated Barry Bonds since he was four years old. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2007, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/barry-bonds/418446/43 "2007-09-09T16:32:37Z")
Barry Bonds never flushes the toilet. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2007, 4:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/barry-bonds/418446/44 "2007-09-09T16:36:53Z")
And he leaves the seat up. ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2007, 4:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/barry-bonds/418446/45 "2007-09-09T16:48:44Z")
[QUOTE=AskNott] Many baseballs are instinctively repelled by Barry Bonds. That’s why he gets so many walks. [/QUOTE] They aren’t repelled. They’re afraid that if they get too close to him, they’ll atrophy. ---
**Author:** ![Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troy_mcclure_sf/32/4150_2.png) [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troy_McClure_SF)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2007, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/barry-bonds/418446/46 "2007-09-09T19:11:42Z")
[QUOTE=Diomedes] Did anyone really take the OP seriously that Bonds sold drugs? [/QUOTE] I wouldn’t take the fact seriously, but I admit I did take the accusation seriously. Even though I can see this is a parody now, it’s really not that far off from what people do say about Bonds. ---
**Author:** ![andros](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/e480ec/32.png) [@andros](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/andros)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2007, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/barry-bonds/418446/47 "2007-09-09T22:40:12Z")
[QUOTE=OneCentStamp] They aren’t repelled. They’re afraid that if they get too close to him, they’ll atrophy. [/QUOTE] Just makes 'em harder to hit. . ---
**Author:** ![Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/d9b06d/32.png) [@Boozahol\_Squid\_P.I](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boozahol_Squid_P.I)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2007, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/barry-bonds/418446/48 "2007-09-10T03:24:48Z")
[QUOTE=OneCentStamp] Um, guys…I think the words “nefarious henchmen” in the OP might be a little tip-off that we’re being whooshed here. 😛 [/QUOTE] That was the only bit that rang true to me… doesn’t he have a squad of guys wearing matching shirts saying “Goons” on them to tote his steroids and break the knuckles of pitchers who walk him? ---
**Author:** ![OneCentStamp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/13edae/32.png) [@OneCentStamp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OneCentStamp)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2007, 3:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/barry-bonds/418446/49 "2007-09-10T03:29:45Z")
[QUOTE=Diomedes] That was the only bit that rang true to me… doesn’t he have a squad of guys wearing matching shirts saying “Goons” on them to tote his steroids and break the knuckles of pitchers who walk him? [/QUOTE] Also one to carry his [del]riot gear[/del] elbow guard. Heh…matching goons. Now I’m picturing an episode of the 60s _Batman_ TV show. **POW! BIFF! ZING!** 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Thudlow\_Boink](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thudlow_boink/32/320_2.png) [@Thudlow\_Boink](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thudlow_Boink)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2007, 12:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/barry-bonds/418446/50 "2007-09-10T12:42:26Z")
Wait—why would rock-and-roll singer Barry U. S. Bonds need steroids, anyway? ---
**Author:** ![descamisado](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e480ec/32.png) [@descamisado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/descamisado)\ **Post date:** [September 10, 2007, 1:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/barry-bonds/418446/51 "2007-09-10T13:31:42Z")
[QUOTE=Thudlow Boink] Wait—why would rock-and-roll singer Barry U. S. Bonds need steroids, anyway? [/QUOTE] High notes? _Really_ high notes. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/barry-bonds/418446.md?page=2)