# Batman versus \[blank\] **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 4, 2003, 9:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/batman-versus-blank/186213 "2003-07-04T09:38:09Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 14\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Ranchoth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ranchoth/32/1066_2.png) [@Ranchoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ranchoth)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 9:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/batman-versus-blank/186213/1 "2003-07-04T09:38:09Z")
Well, I’m sure you all have noticed a recent “trend” in threads, recently. Namely, “Batman vs. [blank].” Before that, it was mostly “Wolverine vs. [blank].” I predict that the next trend will be “‘Dum Dum’ Dugan vs. [blank]” In any case, as a public service, I’ve compiled a brief list of all the “Batman vs.” threads in recent board history. This may save some people valuable milliseconds. Batman vs… (Been done, on the boards) •Bailey •The Boy Scouts •The Cast of “Friends” •Da Bears •An eagle and a bucket of water [The ‘Wonder Twins,’ presumably) •The Enterprise •Hannibal Smith •A hyper-intelligent pan-dimensional being manifesting itself as a tapeworm •James Bond •Superman [Several times] •A Tightly Closed Jar of Pickles •Wolverine And if I may be so bold, I offer a list of “suggestions” for future “vs.” debates. Or just for y’all to chuckle over, either way. •Batman (Paralel world Batmen against each other. e.g. Frank Miller’s “Batman vs. the ‘Golden Age’ Batman,” etc.) •Boba or Jango Fett •The “Comics Code” itself •Darth Vader •Dr. Phibes •The Electoral College •God/Jesus •The “God” from a Jack Chick’s tract •Iceman •_The_ Iceman (The mummy from the Alps) •The Immutable Laws of Physics •The Iron Chef •Old Age •Spider-Man •Saint of Killers •The Terminator (T-600, 800, 900, 1000, or" X". Take your pick) •Thomas Crown Ranchoth ---
**Author:** ![Aslan\_of\_Narnia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecd19e/32.png) [@Aslan\_of\_Narnia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aslan_of_Narnia)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 11:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/batman-versus-blank/186213/2 "2003-07-04T11:18:00Z")
Batman versus… [ul] [li]Death[/li][li]Death Star[/li][li]Earth[/li][li]A pointy spoon[/li][li]Every superhero collectively in the DC, Marvel and Image uinverses[/li][li]50 men from a bean eating contest[/li][li]Brick Wall[/li][li]Jack Black[/li][li]Laurel and Hardy[/li][li]Adam and Eve[/li][/ul] ---
**Author:** ![Czarcasm](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/czarcasm/32/4050_2.png) [@Czarcasm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Czarcasm)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 12:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/batman-versus-blank/186213/3 "2003-07-04T12:58:42Z")
Batman versus… The IMHO Moderator. The IMHO Moderator wins this with one hand tied behind his back, moving this thread to Cafe Society. . . . . . . . . . . . .Hey, could someone give me a hand untying my hand? ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 1:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/batman-versus-blank/186213/4 "2003-07-04T13:04:28Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Czarcasm \* > \*\* > . > . > . > . > . > . > . > . > . > . > . > .Hey, could someone give me a hand untying my hand? \*\* Sorry. They used Bat Rope™ ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 1:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/batman-versus-blank/186213/5 "2003-07-04T13:30:10Z")
Batman vs. Robin Batman vs. Hannibal Lechter Batman vs. The Phantom of the Opera Batman vs. the Founding Fathers ---
**Author:** ![hebesphenomegacorona](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b9e5f3/32.png) [@hebesphenomegacorona](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hebesphenomegacorona)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/batman-versus-blank/186213/6 "2003-07-04T14:43:29Z")
Batman vs:Everything. ---
**Author:** ![widdershins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/f0a364/32.png) [@widdershins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/widdershins)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 4:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/batman-versus-blank/186213/7 "2003-07-04T16:15:34Z")
Batman vs. Nobody (the Terence Hill movie character) Batman vs. Everything But The Girl Batman vs. Joel Schumacher Batman vs. Radar O’Reilly Batman vs. Martha Stewart Batman vs. the Illuminati Batman vs. Scientology Batman vs. Wildest Bill Batman vs. R. Lee Ermey Batman vs. the McRib sandwich Batman vs. Michelle Wie Batman vs. Harpo Marx - utility belt vs. coat that holds everything. The winner fights **alice\_in\_wonderland** and her infinite capacity pants! Batman vs…sv namtaB (sorry couldn’t resist) ---
**Author:** ![Vanyel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@Vanyel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Vanyel)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/batman-versus-blank/186213/8 "2003-07-04T16:32:21Z")
Batman vs. Stephen Hawking Batman vs. Cecil Adams ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/batman-versus-blank/186213/9 "2003-07-04T18:18:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by widdershins \* > Batman vs. Joel Schumacher > \*\* I’m afraid that’s one battle Batman lost. Batman vs Ash (The Evil Dead movies) - groovey Batman vs Bender (Futurama) - I think Batman might be pending for a bending Batman vs the Viet Cong - Didi mow!! Batman vs an Inanimate Carbon Rod Batman vs Jet Li Batman vs Bagdad Bob - “Batman is drowning in rivers of his own blood” ---
**Author:** ![Charlie\_Tan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/charlie_tan/32/12582_2.png) [@Charlie\_Tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Charlie_Tan)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 6:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/batman-versus-blank/186213/10 "2003-07-04T18:28:41Z")
I think we need to add location to this: Batman vs The Enterprise (Middle Earth) Batman vs The Enterprise (Tatooine) Batman vs The Enterprise (Victorian London) Another possible permutation is that trend to have the director’s/writer’s name in the title: Mel Brooks’ Batman vs. The kosher dill pickles Batman by _director_ Ron Howard\* vs. Snake Plisken (location: The Endor Moon) \*Why do all trailers for his movies say ‘director Ron Howard’, with heavy emphasism on director? ---
**Author:** ![furryman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/furryman/32/99_2.png) [@furryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/furryman)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/batman-versus-blank/186213/11 "2003-07-04T19:55:21Z")
Batman vs Man Bat vs Man with a bat. Bruce Wayne vs Bruce Banner vs Bruce Jenner vs Bruce The shark vs some gay guy named “Bruce”. Batman vs batmobile (Taken over by AI) Batman vs Punisher “Mel Brook’s Batman”: I’m trying to imagine this but truthfully I can’t think of anything sillier than the '60 Batman TV series. ---
**Author:** ![Charlie\_Tan](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/charlie_tan/32/12582_2.png) [@Charlie\_Tan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Charlie_Tan)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2003, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/batman-versus-blank/186213/12 "2003-07-04T23:11:30Z")
I can: John Waters’ “Batman, featuring Devine as Catwoman vs. Daffy Duck” ---
**Author:** ![Wolfian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/7ea924/32.png) [@Wolfian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wolfian)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2003, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/batman-versus-blank/186213/13 "2003-07-05T02:01:49Z")
Batman v. Ash Ketchem (the Pokemon kid. They actually did a very funny commerical where Terry got his ass kicked by Pikachu.) Batman v. Link (both have a whole lot of gadets) Batman v. every Charlie’s Angel ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2003, 6:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/batman-versus-blank/186213/14 "2003-07-05T06:06:25Z")
Batman vs. Abraham Lincoln flying a ninja mech armed with a can of Febreeze.